Chapter 10 #3
I rolled my eyes, taking my beer from Faris and leaving them at the bar while I went upstairs. I texted Diesel to make sure Skeeter had arrived, and once I knew he wasn’t alone, I got to work trying to figure out which cop I could bribe to get me some goddamn answers.
Skeeter
“Don’t shoot, it’s just me,” I called out as I opened the door at Diesel’s.
“Living room,” he replied, and I walked towards the sound of his voice, not remembering the last time I’d even been here. It was his sanctuary, and the Sasha shrine in the living room was definitely new.
Diesel looked like absolute hell, and I could tell he’d been crying. Nothing around the house looked broken, so he must have just had a meltdown not a crash out kind of breakdown.
“Hey. You should have told me,” I murmured, sitting beside him and sensing him pull back a little. “I’m sorry you felt like you couldn’t.”
“I can’t though.”
“You can.”
He laughed, but it sounded bitter. “Every time I ask about her, you lose your shit like I personally betrayed you. You pushed me and pushed me to let her in, so you can’t take her away from me now.
I’ve got all these feelings and I don’t know what to do with them,” he scowled, reaching for a beer in front of him.
He probably shouldn’t have been drinking, but I’d let him have it.
“I’m hurting too. We need to stick together and—”
“No. You need to realize your hurt and my hurt are different. You’ve made up your mind about her, but so have I.
You chose to believe she fucked you over, but I didn’t decide that for me.
I want to go and see her. You can either let me, or you can fucking kill me, Skeet, because I’m fucking done,” he growled, eyeing me.
He was completely serious, and slight fear tugged in my chest. I needed him, he was the only other person apart from Brick that I could trust one hundred percent.
He was my family when my crew wanted to turn on me, always standing by me without question.
“She’s only going to suck you in deeper, D. What happens when it goes to shit?” I asked calmly.
“Everything’s already gone to shit. She pulled me out of that dark place I’d buried myself in, and I’ll be damned if I let you shove me back into it all because of your pride and your own damn feelings.
I’m not asking you to forgive her, or to let her hang out at the Shed, but you don’t get to decide if I get to see or talk to her in my own time.
So, either get out of my way or execute me,” he answered, pulling his gun out and pushing it at me. “Go on. Fucking do it.”
“Stop it,” I growled, but he just shook his head, putting the gun to his own head.
“I’m your brother, not your bitch. I respect you as my boss, but you don’t respect me as one of your men. This bullshit ends now.”
“Jesus Christ, put that down,” I warned, snatching it from him before the asshole could shoot himself. “You can go and see her.”
“Swear it? Because if you go back on it later, I won’t ask you to have this conversation again. I’ll just—”
“Look at me,” I said gently, grabbing his jaw firmly. “In your own time, do what you want. I’ll remind you of this if she fucks you over though. You don’t get to check out just because she breaks your heart later. If she does, she’s dead. Do you understand?”
“She won’t, but sure.”
I stared at him for a moment, a little envious of how easily he trusted her. I wished I could, wanting to believe she’d never hurt me, but I just couldn’t.
“You take this week to get your shit together. Go see her, get her to call you every night if you have to, but you’d better be at the Shed Monday morning well rested and no mention of Aurora.”
“Thank you,” he practically whispered, making me feel like a fucking asshole when I realized how badly his hands were shaking.
I sighed, draping an arm around his shoulders and hauling him closer. “C’mon. Go pack a bag. You’re crashing with me tonight.”
He hugged me, not letting go for a while until he decided he was ready, and I waited for him while he headed off to his room to pack a bag.
I glanced around, moving towards the shrine in the corner to look at all the photos. There were so many, my heart hurting for him. Sasha really had been his soulmate.
I smiled when I saw the photo of all of us that was taken not long before Sasha was assaulted. That damage caused a ripple effect among the group.
Sasha died, Diesel pulled away, Marco fucked me over and left, Hunter shot me and went not long after that, and after everything, we had to bury Slash.
It felt like a lifetime ago.
I caught myself wondering how Rory was. Despite what I thought, guilt nipped at me. What if she’d been killed yesterday? My head was a mess, so thinking about her right now was pointless.
Hunter was right, she was his problem now, so there was no need to worry about her.
Even if part of what Diesel said was bugging me.
What if she really hadn’t fucked us over? That wasn’t possible, right?
Frustration built inside me, so I shut that shit down fast. It was easier to block it all out.