Chapter 11
A Beautiful Mess
Kiki
Ipivot in front of the mirror, trying to decide if my hair looks better up or down.
Honestly, I should have gotten a haircut, because it’s seriously overgrown.
But let’s be real—even though life is far better than it was, I still don’t trust the people around Sparkwood not to butcher my hair, and I’m definitely not brave enough to attempt it myself.
Also, while my boyfriend is a very talented contractor, I’m sure as hell not handing him scissors, so this is as good as it gets, folks.
Actually, I look pretty damn good, if I do say so myself. My hair looks healthy and shiny. My cheeks aren’t gaunt hollows anymore, and there’s actual color in them, a soft pink that makes me look less like a Victorian ghost and more like a real live human. Imagine that.
Then there are my clothes. For months, everything in my closet looked like it belonged to someone else.
Someone two sizes bigger than me. This was especially true with my favorite pair of jeans, lovingly dubbed my ‘ass jeans’.
They were amazing, and shockingly expensive, but worth it.
They made my backside as plump and juicy as a peach, until I decided to forgo eating for 24/7 stress.
Now, the suckers fit the way God and tailors intended.
And, cue the drumroll, my boobs are back. No joke, I fill out my bras again. Hell, they’re damn near overflowing at this point. Not that I’m complaining.
“Well, hello girls,” I murmur, cupping my breasts. “Nice of you to return. Let me tell you, Eddie is going to have a ton of fun with you two. Seems dating a younger man is seriously good for all aspects of my health.”
Gus barks at the living room window, alerting me to Eddie’s truck as it pulls into the driveway.
Speaking of my gorgeous man, there he is now.
Yes, I get a little giddy every time I see him. Sue me. It’s been forever since I’ve felt any emotion beyond fear and shame. But Eddie and Theo have brought me back to life. I only hope I bring some modicum of happiness to them.
Eddie strolls inside without knocking, a habit he’s picked up over the last month, his son hot on his heels as he makes a beeline for Gus.
Eddie makes a beeline for me. He drags a slow, appreciative gaze over my body, and damn if it doesn’t linger right where I knew it would.
See? Told you he’d have fun with them.
“God, you look spectacular.” He doesn’t waste a second wrapping his arms around me, that decadent mouth claiming mine and sending a delicious shudder through my bones. “Just wait until I have you all to myself tomorrow night.”
Fuck, but this man can kiss, and trust me, he’s not the only one counting down the minutes to playtime.
“Are you sure I don’t look too curvy? Full disclosure, I’ve put on some weight in the last month.”
He grabs me from behind, wrapping his arms around my waist. “You. Look. Spectacular. Never apologize for these incredible curves. Trust me, I love every one.” He stills, running his hands along the flare of my hips. “You look happy and healthy, Kiki. That’s most important.”
This man. He’s got a ridiculous sex drive, but he makes sure I know it’s way more than physical with him. Every time, he has my best interests at heart.
Still getting used to that concept.
I shrug, squealing as his scruff tickles my skin. “I’m dating this guy and he’s been pretty damn good for me.”
No, it’s not a declaration of love. Not yet, anyway. I’m not brave enough to utter those three little words, especially when I have zero idea how Eddie might respond.
Him screaming and running away is at the top of my list of things to avoid.
But if my words bother him, he doesn’t let on as his grip tightens. “Can’t compare to my woman. She’s incredible.”
My besotted little heart flips at his words, but before I can delve too deeply into it, Theo glances up from his spot on the floor next to Gus, wearing an expression that tells me he’s deeply unimpressed with our affectionate exchange.
“Can we bring Gus with us?” he asks.
Gus, always ready for an adventure, thumps his tail excitedly. Too bad I have bad news for them both.
“Your Aunt Ori and Uncle Ash have a cat, and I’m pretty sure Merlin doesn’t want to entertain Gus tonight.”
Theo considers my words, then nods, giving Gus a scratch behind the ears. “Okay. Sorry, Gus.”
Eddie snaps his fingers. “Oh—before I forget, Deirdre asked about all of us getting together again so she can meet you.”
I blink at him, one word sticking in my craw. “Again?”
He winces, dragging a hand through his hair. “Yeah. I forgot to mention it. Life got busy.”
His explanation doesn’t exactly help matters.
I cross my arms over my chest, trying desperately to appear casual. “How many times has she asked to meet me?”
“Twice now,” he admits. “I figured maybe we could all grab lunch or something.”
The smile drops from my lips as that all-too-familiar feeling of dread claws its way back into the foreground.
No, I’m not freaking out over meeting Deirdre because she was married to Eddie. That’s definitely not the problem. The problem… is me. My name and likeness are well known around here, and not for anything good. At least, not anymore.
Drake and his goddamn band of monsters made certain of that.
“I need a minute.” Escaping to the kitchen, I pace the floor, wringing my hands as I wonder if I still have that Xanax hiding in the drawer.
But Eddie has no intention of giving me space. His boots sound against the floor as he follows me, spinning me around and forcing me to meet his gaze. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
I chew my lip, uncertain how to broach the topic. “What if Deirdre hates me?”
“Why would she hate you?”
I shrug out of his grip. “Oh, I don’t know. Because my ex is a piece of shit.”
Eddie pulls me to him again, looping his arms around my waist. “Yeah, he is, but that’s not you, Kiki. But she knows you’re fantastic with Theo, that I trust you implicitly, and that I’m ridiculously happy with you. That’s what matters.”
In theory, he’s right. But truth and opinion vary wildly in our little slice of the Hudson Valley, especially when it comes to me. The pariah. The monster’s wife.
Seems the uncertainty plays across my face, as Eddie reaches down to steal a kiss, his lips featherlight against mine. “Hey, she’s going to love you. Just like I do.”
I wipe my eyes and do my best to shake it off. “Let’s hope so.”
“Come on. We have to get going. Ori will have my head if we’re late for dinner.”
Nodding, I motion to the bedroom. “Let me grab my purse and I’ll meet you in the truck.”
With a final spin in the mirror and a blot to my cheeks, I’m ready to go.
And then Eddie’s words float up in my mind. She’s going to love you. Just like I do.
Wait a second. Does that mean… no, that’s just something you say, right?
But, what if he does love me? What kind of love? And what does that mean for our future?
Wonderful. My brain has decided to engage in a rapid-fire exchange of ideas, volleying between concern over meeting Deirdre and the latent thrill of Eddie’s casual declaration of love.
Will you please cease and desist, for Christ’s sake?
Damn, I need a glass of wine to shut down the infernal internal chatter.
Dropping a pat on Gus’s head, I follow Eddie and Theo to the truck, determined to act like a normal human being.
Let me tell you, the harder you try to act unaffected, the more affected you appear, and Eddie picks up on it immediately.
He glances at me from the driver’s seat. “Stop worrying.”
“Sure, I’ll tell my brain to switch gears immediately,” I mutter, shooting him a wry grin. “Take my mind off it, please.”
Eddie smirks, glancing in the rearview mirror. “Kinda hard to do with Theo in the backseat.”
At least that drags a laugh out of me. “Men and their one-track minds.”
“Hey, when you have as gorgeous a woman as I do, it’s a damn fine track.”
“Best answer ever.” I lean over, linking my fingers in his. He never pulls back, another difference between him and Drake. If anything, Eddie seems to enjoy the affection, public or otherwise.
He squeezes my hand and presses a quick kiss to my fingers. “True, too. Let’s see, you want a different topic? How about work?”
“Perfect.”
“It’s slower than I’d prefer, but that’s what happens this time of year. I got a call from Mr. Montague last week about that giant restoration up on the hillside. He’s narrowed it down to me and a couple other firms, so here’s hoping.”
“Montague,” I repeat, the name ticking at something in my brain. “Why does that name sound familiar?”
“Because he’s Nolan Montague, the Hollywood director.”
Damn, Eddie wasn’t joking when he said he was a hot shot. “The Oscar winner?”
Eddie nods, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel. “So I’ve heard. He’s been on fire with his last few movies. Has more money than God, which he’ll need for that house.”
Reaching over, I give his thigh a gentle squeeze. “You’re going to get this job, Eddie Landry, and you’re going to make that place shine.”
“There are some really big names in the running, but I’m hopeful. Besides, I think those mock-ups you made put me a few paces ahead. Mr. Montague commented on them the last time we spoke.”
His words send a quiet thrill through me. “I’m always happy to help you.”
“Who knows,” he replies, his words edged with warmth. “It might wind up being a job for you, too. I’ll handle the contracting end and you handle the design.”
Wouldn’t that be a dream? Hell, landing a job of that caliber would be a new beginning.
I know Eddie’s just talking, and I’ll likely never get a call about the house. But I sure hope he does.
Still, a woman can dream a little, right?
I settle back and flip on my heated seat, earning one of Eddie’s infamous smirks. He never uses the damn things, but I love nothing more than a toasty bum.
Fine, I love Eddie more than that, but… there’s that word again.