Chapter Twenty-Four
Iwas frozen in my spot when he pulled away. My eyes snapped open and I could see his self-assured smile as he turned away with his meal.
If I could die right this second, I would.
Well, well, well. Nix’s voice was amused. I thought you said you weren’t interested in him?
Amy, are you okay? Megan’s soft question caught me off guard.
Why wouldn’t she be? Nix was just as confused as I was.
Megan came closer and started to rub her side against the wall in my mind.
Because… She started. She didn’t want to like Rowan because of us.
We are waiting for your mate, Nix. You, yourself, are interested in Erubus.
Falling for a man, specifically our king, would be hard.
Knowing he will be selecting a queen, or finding his mate, is even worse.
Megan paused. No matter what happens, Rowan isn’t for her and she knows it.
Nix was quiet. I didn’t think of that. I felt her following Megan, pressing herself against the wall.
If Rowan is who you want, I would give his wolf a shot.
He is the king, so he will be strong. I haven’t set myself on Erubus, yes I like him, but I won’t force you to be with a man you don’t want to be with.
I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. “I won’t do that to you again.” Brandon had taught me that if we were going to end up with any man, I want all of us to agree with him. Plus, Rowan, like Megan said, was destined for someone else.
I could feel the burn of tears behind my eyes, but I was being stupid. He is just a man, a man who obviously doesn’t like me.
You don’t know if he likes you or not. Nix offered.
“If he liked me, he would have kissed me.” I shook my head and grabbed the meals.
I took a deep breath before walking out.
“Choose a meal.” I laid the choices on the table and everyone grabbed their choice.
I brought the rest back to the kitchen and picked one I wanted. “Does anyone need theirs heated up?”
I put mine to the side and went back into the living room to heat everyone’s dinner up. After everything was done, I passed out utensils and turned the tv on for background noise.
When I sat down with my meal, I slid off the loveseat and onto the floor. Rowan looked at me weirdly, but I put my food on the table and ignored his look as I ate.
I felt him shift closer, and I wanted to pull away. I don’t know what he was playing at. If he just liked the attention or what, but I didn’t enjoy being toyed with. But I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of knowing he was bothering me.
Sooner or later, he would have his mate, and I would fade from his mind.
It might not be what you are thinking, Amy. Megan tried to comfort me. Not everyone is like Vince and Brandon.
All I could do was nod. In my head, I knew that. But with everything that happened in my first life. I wasn’t going to trust any man. They would have to prove their intentions with action.
And Rowan proved that he wasn’t really interested in me.
Again, the thought made me want to cry. I couldn’t understand why I was so emotional today.
My phone rang when I had that thought, and I checked the caller ID. It was my mom.
I answered. “Mom?” Her sobs hit me in my chest and I closed my eyes. “Mom, what’s wrong?”
“Your father is gone, baby.”
“What?” I just talked to him. What did she mean he was gone?
“There was an attack today, and the pack was wiped out.” The words hit me in my chest. She didn’t know the truth and I couldn’t tell her over the phone, either. Fuck. “Come home. I need you to come home.”
“I can’t leave mom.” I whispered the words. I could feel everyone’s eyes on me. “No one is allowed to leave school without an armed guard now.”
“Then I’m coming to you.”
“I moved out of my dorm.” I explained that some of us were being moved to the apartment building.
“Come here, mom. I’ll tell Sterling to send you up to my apartment.
” People would know soon enough that I moved in here.
But I didn’t want them to know I was in the penthouse. No one but the ones in here would know.
“Okay baby. I’m on my way.” Her sobs ripped my chest open as she hung up. I looked down at my phone for a moment, a little lost. The silence that followed was deafening.
I looked up, surprised when I found everyone’s eyes on me. “Sorry, my mom is heading this way.”
Toya stood and collected all the garbage and brought it into the kitchen. “Let’s go ladies.” Toya called as she dumped everything into the trash.
“What?” Wendy called out as she stood.
Toya stepped out of the kitchen and looked back at me.
“I don’t know how long we have, but Amy is about to have a very hysterical woman who lost her mate in her hands.
” Toya gave a soft smile. “She gets to explain to her devastated mother that her dad is still alive and then she is going to have a very livid Luna on her hands.”
“Oh fuck.” Hanna jumped up. “No offense Amy, I don’t have the ability to deal with a distraught Luna that might rampage at any moment.”
I just nodded. “Yeah. It won’t be pretty.” I stood and smiled. “Honestly, it’s fine. We can work out all the details tomorrow about training and figure out a time that works for everyone.” I looked around as everyone stood. “Can you all meet me in the cafeteria at seven thirty tomorrow morning?”
“That works for me.” Wendy stood and walked to the door.
Everyone else nodded as they headed that way. I walked everyone to the door. “Make sure you bring your schedules.” I turned to look back at Rowan, who was still seated on the loveseat, but I turned back to the girls. “Thank you for coming. Toya?”
“Yeah?”
“Can you tell Sterling that my mother will be here soon and to send her up?”
“Of course.” She leaned in and whispered into my ear. “Good luck with him.” She nodded towards Rowan and smirked.
My heart wanted to speed, but I knew I had to keep my head on straight. This would not end the way I wanted it to end.
“Have a good night.” Rowan called back to everyone, and they waved as they walked out.
I shut the door and turned back to Rowan. I awkwardly pointed to the kitchen. “I’m just going to see if I have something to clean up.” I hurried away and didn’t see the smirk that hit his face.
“Tonight was interesting.” He started, and I heard his voice moving closer as I looked up. He rounded the fridge.
“Oh?”
“Yeah. It gave me more insight into everything going on.”
I nodded. He was right; it illuminated everything. “Yeah.” I agreed. I bent down and found sponges and dish soap under the counter. “This place has everything.” I thought I whispered, but Rowan’s voice sounded above me.
“That’s because I had Sterling stock this place with basic things we had in my place, so you had enough to survive until you went shopping tomorrow.”
I stood, backing up, so I didn’t hit my head on the counter, and I nearly screamed as my butt backed into his legs. I jolted forward and hit my hips off the counter, hissing from the pain as I hit.
“Fuck, that hurt.” I dropped the sponge and soap into the sink and then I was turned around. His fingers lifted my shirt and tugged down my pants a little, baring my hips to his eyes.
“Are you okay? Let me see.” The concern in his voice was surprising, but I felt my face burn when his fingers trailed over the bare skin.
I tried to back away, but he held my side.
“Stay still. I’m trying to see how bad it is.
” His voice was distracted as he knelt in front of me.
I could feel his breath on my skin as he leaned closer.
“I don’t see any bruises yet, but the redness looks painful.
” I stared down at him and I could feel my lower half clench, grow damp.
I bit my lip. Please, goddess, don’t do this when he is right there.
I felt my mouth dry up as he leaned in. I could hear his soft, rhythmic breathing change, and I knew he noticed. My face grew hotter, and I wanted to die. “It’s okay.” I tried to turn again, but he held me tight.
I closed my eyes briefly and clamped my hands on the counter before I talked myself into looking down again. When I finally worked up the courage, I looked down and I met his eyes.
He was staring up at me, and I could see the subtle flaring of his nostrils as he breathed my scent in. I wanted to run away. I could tell by his blown out pupils he could scent my arousal.
“You look like you’re about to run.” His voice was soft, his breath heated my skin, and I grew feverish as excitement pulsed from my core.
“Are you going to run, little rabbit?” His hands slid up my sides as he stood, and I shivered.
I leaned back as he pressed against me. He leaned into me.
His lips coming against mine, but not touching.
“If you run, little rabbit, I will chase you.”
The knock on the door has the two of us jumping apart.
I stared up at him with wide eyes. What the fuck was that?
Was he toying with me now? I shook my head to clear the muddled thoughts racing through my mind.
I needed to take a few steps back, but the counter was behind me.
I wanted to push him away, but I knew if I touched him, I would fall apart.
I would jump into his arms and I would allow him to walk over my heart like I did with Brandon.
He isn’t him. Megan’s soft voice countered my inner thoughts. He is nice, and just, and-
And not mine. I stopped her. If I allow myself to think about him in any other way, I think I will shatter this time.
He might not be Brandon, but I never really liked him as a person.
I loved him as my mate because we were destined to be together.
As the moon goddess intended, but I never viewed him as a friend, a partner.
Someone I could grow with. I felt the burn of tears. I can see that with Rowan.
Then why not? Nix’s voice was softer than I had ever heard her. Why not see where this could go?
Because. I looked up into his eyes that were searching mine.
Because he doesn’t actually want me. I have to be smarter than I was in my last life.
We need to be smarter. I coughed as I realized we were just staring at each other.
“I should get that.” I looked away as I reached back to turn off the water.
I trailed against the cupboards, trying my best not to touch him, but his eyes trailed me the entire time.
I rounded the corner and wiped away the tear that finally fell as I straightened my shoulders.
“Yeah. Sure.” Rowan’s voice trailed me and I closed my eyes for a second, leaning against the wall to collect myself.
But I didn’t have long as the knock sounded again and I could hear the faint sniffles coming from my mother.
I think Rowan heard her too. His voice came closer.
“I should actually get going.” I felt a punch to my gut, but I shook it off.
This was for the best. This is what I needed.
“Of course.” I smiled as he rounded the corner.
He stared at my face for a second too long, and I knew he probably caught the slight redness in my eyes from fighting the tears.
I coughed again and turned back to the door.
“Thank you for coming. I appreciated the backup when talking to everyone. You aren’t mad that I told them? That I’m going to tell my mother?”
“No.” Rowan’s voice was soft. I felt a slight breeze near my shoulder and I closed my eyes. Please, Goddess, don’t let him touch me. I prayed. “I won’t be around, and I want you to have people you can trust around you.”
“Good.” I smiled. “Thank you for the apartment. It is amazing.” I smiled over my shoulder.
“No worries.” Rowan ran a hand through his hair. “Amy?” I could tell he wanted to discuss it. But I cut my eyes away before he caught the sheen of tears in my eyes.
Please don’t. I begged. Not right now. “Yeah?” I turned as we reached the door.
“Nothing.” His eyes cut away as he tucked his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. “I’m heading back out tonight, and I don’t know when I will get to see you next.”
“Oh.” I felt hollow as his words hit me like physical blows. “I understand. You are the king.”
He nodded. “And from the looks of what happened today, I have a lot of things I need to clean up.” He closed his eyes. “About today…”
“Don’t even worry about it. It’s my fault.” I smiled up at him and opened the door, effectively cutting off any conversation we would have had. I don’t think I would survive him telling me he couldn’t or wouldn’t be with me.
He is not your mate. He is not your mate. I ran the words through my mind on repeat. The tears were getting closer to spilling over and I really didn’t want him here to witness it.
“Baby.” My mom’s voice broke the tension, and we both turned to face her.
Her dark brown hair was a mess, her face swollen and red from her sobs.
Her eyes shifted to her wolf’s, and I knew she was about to break apart.
“He…” She stumbled over her words when she saw Rowan.
But her grief won out. “He’s gone baby. You dad is gone.
” She practically ran into my arms and as I wrapped my arms around her waist, she shattered.