Chapter 10
10
Even after all Zach had said at the first Romeo and Juliet rehearsal, nothing changed. He didn’t come to any more and Esme only saw him from a distance for the rest of the week. On one of those occasions, it was post-lunch and he was heading back into the castle with Lucille who wore a stunning, if rather wide, bejewelled satin gown in pale blue, cinched in at the waist and with a fitted bodice that gave her the appearance of a heaving bosom, synonymous with Georgian-era fashion. Her hair was covered by an ornate white-powdered wig that stood so high atop her head she seemed to be having difficulty keeping herself upright. Zach was holding onto her arm, and she clung to his. He released himself from her grip momentarily to wave and he smiled when he spotted her. Esme waved back but this resulted in a sour glare from the usually dark blonde actress walking beside him. From that one glance, Esme now clearly understood what he’d meant about the issues they had as a former couple working together.
Esme had seen interviews with the famous actress where she had come across as sickly sweet and most people adored her, but where Ruby Locke seemed genuine, Lucille Delgado lacked the sincerity in her eyes. To Esme, who had been fascinated by actors and their interactions with people for many years, she always seemed to be on TV shows or meeting fans under duress, glancing around for an exit, and her smiles were fake, never quite reaching her eyes. Esme thought it must be exhausting to be so filled with disdain, especially for those people who had helped to get her to where she was. After all, she had everything she could possibly want handed to her on a platter. She’d even had Zach but had dumped him for someone else, so she clearly was crazy.
* * *
Bryce, aka Romeo, made a full recovery from his bout of food poisoning and attended the rest of the rehearsals. He did so sporting two delightful (and not at all amusing) new additions; a chestnut-coloured toupee – that reminded Esme of some poor creature that had been run over and discovered at the side of a road – and ill-fitting false teeth that dropped from his top jaw every time he moved his mouth to recite a line. This resulted in a constant smacking of his lips as he tried to keep them in place or, alternatively, soliloquising through clenched teeth, meaning he appeared angry every time he spoke, regardless of the content of his speech – both very disconcerting situations. His delivery of the lines was a little clunky to begin with but he soon relaxed into the part and even paid Esme a compliment at the end of one of the rehearsals.
‘I’m taking all my cues from your acting, you know, Esme. You make it so easy to understand the gobbledegook that Shakespeare wrote, and I can almost understand it. I mean, talk about why use three words when thirty-three will do .’
‘That’s very kind of you, Bryce, thank you,’ Esme replied.
‘By the way, I’m sorry about these things.’ He pointed to his mouth. ‘I’m having Turkey teeth soon.’
A bizarre image popped into Esme’s head of a dark grey winged bird with broad tail feathers, a pink jowly neck and a full set of pearly whites, shouting ‘ Gobbleobble! ’ as its teeth fell from its top jaw like Bryce’s did. Her expression must have shown her utter confusion because he added, ‘Aye, you know, I was hoping I’d have my op in Turkey for my implant dentures before we opened but my flight was changed so I had to rearrange things, which means I’m stuck with these things until afterwards.’ He jabbed a finger towards his falsies again and rolled his eyes.
Ah, that makes more sense! Esme thought as she stifled a giggle.
On the final rehearsal of that week, Sylvia made an unwelcome and devastating announcement that due to scheduling conflicts – she didn’t say whose – their performance had been brought forward by a couple of months and would now be a ‘one-date-only’ thing, which horrified Esme. This meant that they had only had three weeks of rehearsals that would culminate in a single day of performances; a matinee and an evening. Gone was the prospect of months to prepare and instead the whole cast was thrust into a frenzy of learning lines, trying on countless hired costumes, dodging the volunteer set builders and endeavouring not to leg each other up on stage as they learned their marks. Their play now possessed most of the ingredients for a comedy of errors, even though that wasn’t old Will Shakespeare’s initial intention.
From that point on, the rehearsals were gruelling, and Sylvia lost her temper on more than one occasion, stating that she ‘wouldn’t have to put up with this level of amateurism in the West End’. Parker responded, albeit under his breath, that in the West End they’d ‘all be getting paid astronomical amounts for this shit so would probably try much harder’ and Esme tried not to laugh – he did have a point.
* * *
April arrived and along with it there seemed to be an indubitable air of spring about the place. The sun was a frequent guest in the sky and the mood on site at the castle was buzzing. She had met Judd for coffee breaks a few times in a bid to get to know her soon-to-be new housemate. They chatted easily and Esme began to wonder why she’d been so anxious. The more she got to know him, the more she really liked him. He made her laugh and was so incredibly kind and thoughtful. But for reasons she had tried to ignore she had been putting off moving in with him. For all the initial desperation to be independent, she was nervous about stepping out on her own again, especially after the disaster her first time living away from home had ended up being.
‘So, do you cook? I love cooking but I’m not the best,’ he said as he placed his mug down.
Esme rolled her eyes. ‘I do like to cook but my mum always beats me to it. She’s a freelance book editor so she works from home.’
‘That must be nice, to be so well looked after. Are you sure you want to move out?’ He smiled and his eyes lit up. He had such bright, happy eyes. Ugh, I make him sound like a puppy.
‘As lovely as it is, it can be quite stifling. So yes, I’m sure.’
‘So, when are you moving in? Not that I’m rushing you. I’m just looking forward to having some company,’ he told her with a shy smile.
‘Ugh, sorry, I’m almost ready. Just a few more bits to get,’ she lied. She’d had everything she’d needed for ages. Right there on the spot, however, she made a decision. ‘In fact, I think I’ll move in on Friday night, if that’s okay with you?’
A wide, handsome smile spread across Judd’s face. ‘Perfect.’
On Thursday afternoon, when they met to go over the bookings for the art space and to collate some other castle admin, Olivia told Esme that she had been chatting to Eilidh and that the shoot was back on schedule and going really well. ‘They’re so happy with the castle as their location, Esme, and to be honest there hasn’t been as much disruption as I’d expected,’ Olivia said. ‘And I want you to know I’m so grateful to you for all the hours you’ve been putting in to make sure it’s all running smoothly; it hasn’t gone unnoticed.’ Esme loved the fact that she was appreciated. ‘Oh, and I had coffee with Ruby and Lucille yesterday lunchtime. They’re both so lovely,’ she gushed.
‘First name basis already, huh?’ Esme replied. ‘That’s really good to hear.’ She didn’t mention the fact that Lucille would have happily killed her with a stare à la a Georgian Darth Vader when she had seen her earlier in the day.
Olivia’s smile disappeared and a look of concern crumpled her brow and then came something she had hoped not to hear. ‘The only problem that’s occurred, or that that they made me aware of at least, is something Lucille mentioned.’
Esme swallowed a lump of discomfort that had lodged in her throat. ‘Oh? W-what was that?’
‘She said one of the staff had offered to help Zach rehearse his lines a couple of times and he had tried to let them down gently, but she said they’d kept bothering him. Apparently they were quite insistent. She said he hadn’t had the heart to tell them how irritating it was and that they should leave him to it. After that he just had to stop going to that part of the castle grounds to avoid them. I don’t suppose there’s any point asking the team who it was because they usually all stick together. They’re all friends, which is great, of course; however, on this occasion I could do with knowing. I have to be honest that I’m a little annoyed a member of my team is bothering the actor when everyone was warned at the start of this whole thing to get on with their work and not make a fuss, so I’m not sure which part of that instruction someone has misunderstood. I don’t think I could have been much clearer. Anyway, I apologised, and she was really sweet about it, thankfully, but I think I might get you to send an email to all staff members to reiterate to everyone that this is currently a working film set and that they shouldn’t get in the way.’
Esme felt her face heating and her heart played a drum solo worthy of Roger Taylor from Queen. So, Lucille was now trying to drop her in it, was she? She had never even spoken to the woman, but it was clear that the green-eyed monster was at play.
Esme was on the verge of confessing when Brodie appeared in the doorway with Freya. ‘Look, there’s your beautiful mummy,’ he said, pointing at Olivia. ‘I’m sure she must’ve almost finished work, and that means we get her to ourselves for the whole evening,’ he said with a wink at Olivia.
She stood and crossed the room to kiss her husband and her daughter. ‘What a lovely surprise. And yes, I think we’re all done here, aren’t we, Esme? Can I leave you to send the email about what we discussed?’
Esme nodded. ‘Sure, I’ll get to it before I head home.’
Olivia waved a hand. ‘Oh, no, do it tomorrow. It’ll be fine then. Get yourself off home.’
* * *
On Friday morning, Esme got to work early and caught Parker as he was making himself a coffee in the castle kitchen – one of the few rooms that wasn’t being used for filming. As she made a drink for herself, she explained about the lies Lucille had told Olivia.
‘The cheeky bitch!’ Parker whispered, albeit a little too loudly. ‘I knew she was a nasty piece of work. She could give Rachel McAdams and Amanda Seyfried from Mean Girls a run for their money.’ Esme stifled a smile at his ability to once again mix up the actor with the character they played, as he continued, ‘The ones who look like her always tend to be like that; never a hair out of place, pristine makeup, perfect clothing, gleaming white teeth. They’re always false just like their boobs. And bitchy to boot.’ His eyebrows shot up. ‘You didn’t admit that it was you who had been helping him, did you?’
Esme glanced over her shoulder to check the coast was clear. ‘I didn’t get a chance,’ she whispered. ‘She wants me to send out the email this morning, but I feel like I’m getting everyone in trouble for something I did.’
Parker reached out and squeezed her arm. ‘Just send it. Don’t go admitting to anything when you did nothing wrong. Lucille’s version is bull, and she knows it. And okay, people will no doubt play detective, and try to figure out who the culprit is, so prepare yourself to be asked twenty questions, but they won’t hear anything from me, I can assure you.’
Esme smiled. ‘Thanks, Parker. I really appreciate that. I mean, it’s not like it’ll happen again anyway. Zach hinted as much when he apologised for not turning up the day after, when we’d agreed to meet up to go through his lines again.’
Parker narrowed his eyes and pursed his lips while crossing his arms over his chest. ‘And all because of Lucille, I bet.’ Esme simply nodded so he added, ‘That conniving cow. Who the hell does she think she is?’
‘A rich, beautiful actor who can get any man she wants and who everyone thinks is wonderful?’ Esme replied with a shrug.
‘Yeah, well, I wouldn’t touch her with someone else’s, even if I was straight. Just because someone’s beautiful on the outside and portrays a sweet and innocent persona doesn’t mean they’re the same on the inside.’
He had a point. And later that morning, with no small amount of trepidation, Esme hit send on the email. She was as tactful as possible, but the guilt made her stomach do somersaults and eventually stole her appetite too. She knew that, at some point, she would have to tell Olivia she was the culprit in question, even if it didn’t go down exactly as Lucille had explained it. She just hoped she didn’t get into too much trouble or worse still, get fired.
* * *
After work on Friday, Esme, along with her mum and dad, loaded up both of their cars with her belongings and once Betty was secured into her car seat they set off for Garden Cottage. It was finally happening; Esme was moving out and couldn’t have been happier.
The drive from Dores to Drumblair was as picturesque as ever. The hedgerows were alive with butterflies fluttering hurriedly about their work, and birds collecting twigs to build their nests, and the sky overhead was the kind of blue you usually saw in places like Spain in the summer months. There’s one in the eye to all those who think it rains all the time in Scotland , Esme thought. In a small way she was going to miss this short commute to the castle but in so many others she was happy that she wouldn’t need to make it unless she was visiting her parents.
Judd met them at the door of Garden Cottage. ‘Hey, Mr and Mrs Cassidy, good to see you both. Evening, roomie!’ he called out with a wave, his attention focused on Betty. ‘Oh, and hi to you too, Esme,’ he added with a wink.
‘Very funny, Judd,’ Esme replied as she lifted Betty down to the ground. ‘Betty’s excited about her new house, aren’t you, princess?’ The little dog ran towards Judd with her curly tail wagging a wild rhythm all of its own.
‘Aye, it’ll be great to have a wee dug around the place,’ Judd said as he helped them carry the boxes inside and up to Esme’s new room. As they worked, Betty sniffed her way around the place, familiarising herself with her new surroundings.
‘This sofa’s a bit too small though. Not sure we’ll both fit on it,’ Judd said with a chuckle as he carried Betty’s new bed under his arm. He still was a little hit and miss with his eye contact, but Esme put it down to him being shy and the fact that they didn’t yet really know one another that well.
‘I’m not sure Betty will want to share anyway,’ Esme replied, laughing.
A new mattress and a rug had been delivered to her room so all she needed to do now was unpack, make her bed with the new dark green forest creatures bedding she had found – it was rather special with its fox, rabbit, stag and toadstool print – and settle in.
On the window ledge of her room stood a simple glass vase filled with sunny yellow roses; their sweet fragrance filled the cosy space. She hadn’t seen either of her parents bring them in so that could only mean one thing. She smiled as she turned to face Judd. He was placing a pile of boxes on the floor in the corner of the room by the fireplace.
She pointed to the vase. ‘Did you get these for me?’
His face coloured pink and he nodded, scratching his chin. ‘I did, aye. Yellow roses for friendship,’ he stated matter-of-factly, before he turned and headed back down the stairs with no further comment.
‘What a thoughtful young man,’ her mum said, a hint of surprise to her voice.
Esme tilted her head with intrigue as she watched Judd walk away. ‘He is. And what he doesn’t know about flowers isn’t worth knowing.’
Once the boxes were in situ, she walked down the stairs with her parents.
Judd was waiting in the hallway. ‘I’ll make a cuppa, shall I?’ he said, gesturing to the kitchen.
‘Thanks, Judd, but not for us,’ Esme’s dad said before turning his attention to his daughter. ‘We’ll get going and let you unpack, pet. You know where we are if you need us.’ He hugged her tightly.
‘Thanks, Dad,’ she said as she hugged him back.
Then her mum wrapped her arms around her. ‘You can always come home if it doesn’t work out. You’ll always have a place to live with us, sweetheart,’ she said as her voice wavered.
Esme held her mum at arm’s length. ‘I know, thank you. But remember I’m only up the road this time. Not in a whole other country thousands of miles away.’
Her mum laughed and swiped at tears that had escaped and trickled down her cheeks. ‘I know, I know. I’m being ridiculous. I’ll just miss your grumpy face at breakfast,’ she teased.
‘Charming!’ Esme said, laughing. ‘I can’t help not being a morning person.’
‘Ooh, noted!’ Judd said as he walked back through to the lounge from the kitchen. ‘I’ll be sure to avoid you until you’ve had coffee.’
Esme laughed and called after him, ‘I’m not that bad, honestly.’
Her mum hugged her again and kissed the side of her head. ‘I’ll message you tomorrow and we’ll come and see you after the weekend to check out your room once it’s all sorted. Love you.’
‘Love you too. And you, Dad.’
Once both her parents’ vehicles were out of sight, Esme closed the front door and a wave of sadness tugged at her insides, but she mentally shrugged it off. This was a whole new, very positive chapter to her life.
Judd called through from the lounge, ‘Come and have a break. I’ve made fresh coffee, and I even got some nice biscuits in honour of you moving in. You can sort your stuff later.’
When she walked into the room, she was surprised to find Betty snuggled up beside Judd on the sofa. ‘Looks like you’ve got a new friend,’ she said, nodding towards the snoozing pug.
He laughed. ‘Aye, I seem to have an affinity with dugs,’ he said as he gently stroked Betty. ‘I was on the verge of getting a golden retriever pup from the same mother as Brodie’s dog, Wilf, seeing as she’s had a new litter. But when you decided to move in with Betty I changed my plans.’
Esme felt a little bad. ‘Oh, no, you should get a pup if that’s what you want. Please don’t let us stop you.’
‘No, don’t worry, you didn’t stop me, it’s not like that. I just felt like it was the kind of thing we should maybe agree on.’
His words didn’t help to ease her guilty conscience. ‘But I have Betty, and we didn’t agree on her, so…’
‘Yeah but you already had her and anyway, I wasn’t sure if she liked other dogs, so I thought it best to wait. But she’s a wee sweetie, aren’t you, Betty?’ he said as the pug rolled onto her back, and he rubbed her belly.
‘I’m just glad you didn’t mind me bringing her. She’s my little saviour.’
Judd crumpled his brow. ‘Oh? How so?’
Esme picked up her mug and took a sip of the steaming aromatic coffee. ‘Oh… I don’t want to bore you with my problems on night one. Surely that’s a night seven topic.’ She laughed, trying to make light of things.
Judd shrugged. ‘Hey, sorry, I don’t mean to pry. You don’t have to tell me anything you don’t feel comfortable with. I just think if we’re going to share a house it would be good to get to know each other a bit. And I’d like us to be friends. If-if you’re comfortable with that, of course.’
Says the man who won’t make eye contact , she thought but didn’t say it aloud. ‘Oh, absolutely. Me too.’ She pursed her lips and pondered for a moment. ‘Let’s just say I experienced a pretty rough heartbreak and when my dad brought Betty home for me, I finally started to heal.’
Judd nodded but didn’t speak for a few moments, he simply stared straight ahead and tapped his fingernails on his mug, a rhythmic drumming sound but not one to any tune she could recognise. After a pause, he said, ‘I was never allowed a pet when I was younger because we spent a lot of time moving around. Dad was in the army, and Brigadier General Fergus Alec Cowan was of the opinion that dogs were akin to vermin. The only dog he tolerated were the ones trained to sniff out bombs and even then he wouldn’t have one in the house. Plus, we moved back and forth overseas a fair bit, so I suppose it wouldn’t have been fair… or easy. The houses we lived in were always spotless just the way he liked it and even since Dad died my mum has kept her place as pristine as when he was alive, so I didn’t bother suggesting we got a dug before I left, even though I think it would have been excellent company for her. I worry about her being alone.’
‘Was he quite strict then, your dad?’
Judd huffed. ‘And then some. I’m an only child, even though they tried for years for more kids after me. Probably because I was a disappointing son for my dad.’
Esme was shocked at this admission. ‘How?’
He sighed. ‘I had loads of issues with settling in at all those different schools when we moved around, and as a result I didn’t have many friends.’ He laughed without humour. ‘I got in trouble a lot too and Dad said I wasn’t disciplined enough, which was totally untrue if you’d witnessed my homelife growing up. Everything was so regimented. Get up at this time, eat at this time, go to bed at this time, repeat, ad infinitum.’ He stared off as if he was talking to himself and scratched his chin. ‘I knew from early on there was something different about me and I spent a lot of time googling when I was younger, heard about ADHD and autism and thought, “Ooh, maybe that’s me,” because there were so many similar traits I recognised in myself back then. In fact, I’m still convinced now, but back then things like that were just weaknesses and made-up conditions to my dad, so when I mentioned it he refused to have me tested, telling me I was looking for excuses to behave badly. His answer to the whole thing was more discipline and even more shouting, like I was one of his subordinates. And it didn’t matter who was around so there’s no wonder I couldn’t keep friends really, when he was at home, when you think about it.’
Esme’s heart sank at the apparently lonely childhood Judd must have experienced. But now some of his little foibles made a lot more sense. ‘I’m so sorry to hear that, Judd. Have you thought about seeing someone now about a diagnosis? Would it help?’
He sighed. ‘Nah. There’s not a lot of point trying to get diagnosed these days. It takes so long to even be seen for consultation unless you can afford to go private, and who has that kind of money? And anyway, sadly, folks seem to think it’s some trendy bandwagon that people like me jump on, so I fear they would take me even less seriously than they already do.’ He chuckled but, again, there was no humour visible in his stoic expression. ‘I would’ve loved a canine companion so much, and I actually think it would’ve helped me to no end. You hear about people having dugs for anxiety and other health issues, so I’m sure it would have been great company and comfort. No judgement, you know? Just unconditional love. Anyway, I always swore I’d get one when I moved out.’
When Esme didn’t speak, he chewed his lip and covered his face with one hand, rubbing roughly before giving a deep sigh. ‘Shit, sorry. That was what you’d call a serious unintentional info dump, eh? In case you hadn’t noticed, I have a tendency to overshare too.’
Esme smiled. ‘Not at all.’ She wasn’t sure what she could say to ease his mind but went with, ‘And you’re not alone with the dog thing. I always wanted one when I was little, but my mum was never a fan either. After I arrived back home from travelling, Dad got me Betty without even consulting her when I was living at home, so I’m guessing he got in plenty of trouble about that. You should have seen her face.’
Judd laughed. ‘I do love a rebel.’ He took a gulp of his coffee and munched on a fancy biscuit for a moment. ‘So… you’re single now then?’
Esme almost choked on the mouthful she had just drunk. ‘Pfft, come right out with it, why don’t you?’
Judd cringed. ‘Sorry. I really don’t have a filter, do I? Feel free to tell me to get lost if I ever ask things out of turn.’
She found she couldn’t be annoyed at him. He was pretty straightforward kind of guy. ‘No, you’re fine. And yes. I’m single. I’ve sworn off men, actually. At least for a while anyway.’
‘Can’t say I blame you. We can be a shitty and unpredictable bunch.’ He picked up another biscuit and took a big bite.
‘What about you? Are you seeing anyone?’
Judd chewed for a moment then sighed. ‘Alas, no. I get the impression women think I’m a bit odd. But come to think of it, in all honesty I don’t think I’d know if someone fancied me even if they came and danced naked in front of me.’
Esme giggled. ‘I think in that particular case it may be pretty obvious, depending on where you were, of course.’
He laughed. ‘Actually, I think I may wait until that really happens. The last time I took the plunge and asked someone out was an utter debacle involving one of the waitresses in the café. She was so pretty, and I really liked her. We’d been chatting and she was super friendly and did that tucking her hair behind her ear thing loads, and she touched my arm a few times which, according to what you see on YouTube, means someone fancies you, apparently. So of course, I stupidly, and very wrongly as it happens, thought that meant she was flirting with me, so I asked her if she fancied going out some time. After she’d finished looking at me like I’d suddenly grown a second head she declined and never spoke to me again. Then she left a week later, and I haven’t seen her since.’
‘Aww. I’m sure that was just a coincidence.’
He shrugged. ‘Who the hell knows? Although, I suppose it would help if I could read people better. I don’t know.’
As they chatted, Esme warmed to Judd more and more. He was quirky and had a wicked sense of humour but was quite blunt in some ways too. If he wondered it, he asked it. It was weirdly refreshing. And at least, she figured, she’d always know where she stood with him. She could definitely see them being friends as well as housemates.
‘What type of music do you like?’ she asked.
‘A bit of everything, to be honest. Mostly rock music though. I like Queen, Kiss, you know, all the older stuff where people actually played their instruments. You?’
‘I do like Queen and Kiss. My dad loves all that kind of thing so it’s what I was brought up on, but I’m more of a Taylor Swift kind of girl.’
Judd stood abruptly and pointed to the door. ‘Right, that’s it, get out!’
Esme gasped and for a split second she thought he was being serious, and she felt the colour drain from her face. She made to stand up, but he burst out laughing.
‘Oh, God, Esme, I’m joking, you wee dafty! Sit down!’ She slumped quickly back onto the sofa and relief flooded her body. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, his expression a mask of seriousness again. ‘Now, what I’m going to say can go no further, okay?’ She nodded so he continued, ‘Don’t tell anyone but I’m a bit of a closet Swiftie myself. I arrived late to the party, but she impresses me. Not just her music but her business acumen and her charitable works. And her lyrics are pretty poetical which is cool. But,’ he wagged his finger at her, ‘if word gets out about any of this I’ll tell everyone you have false teeth. I have a reputation to uphold as a mean and moody type.’
Esme laughed. ‘I wouldn’t call you mean or moody, and I don’t have false teeth.’
‘No, that’s as may be but I’ll still tell people you do. And you’ve seen how convincing I can be with the whole get out thing.’ He grinned.
Esme stood and walked over to him, her hand held out. ‘My lips are sealed, and my teeth are real. Deal?’
Judd shook it. ‘Deal. Blimey, with poetry like that you could give Miss Swift a run for her money.’ He laughed. ‘So, what’s your favourite Swift era?’ he asked.
She sat again and pursed her lips. ‘Oh, I love them all but honestly I think I’m a Folklore girl. You?’
He shrugged. ‘Hate them all. Remember?’ He gave a theatrical wink.
Esme tapped her nose. ‘Got it.’
* * *
Sleeping in a new room shouldn’t have been so strange considering her travels but Esme found herself lying awake for what felt like hours. And every time she began to nod off, a noise would startle her awake. The house was old and of course this meant it creaked a little as the wood expanded and contracted in the changing temperature. Betty didn’t have any such problems and snuggled up on her new sofa, snoring her little head off.
Esme glanced at the screen of her phone to find it was half three in the morning and rather than fighting with herself she decided to go down to the kitchen and get a drink of milk or tea; anything so she wouldn’t associate her bed with insomnia. As she closed her bedroom door and turned, she almost jumped out of her skin as she came face to bare chest with someone in the hallway.
She stifled a squeal and covered her mouth. ‘Oof!’
‘Oh, shit, sorry! Are you okay?’ Judd asked, grabbing onto her arms to steady her. The second time this had happened.
In the dim moonlight coming through the landing window, she could see the striations of the taut muscles of his body. The skin of his biceps and his stomach was smooth and flawless, and she realised she was staring. She shook her head to dislodge the wave of whatever the heck had just washed over her. ‘I’m fine, yes, sorry about that. I was just going to get a drink.’
‘Can’t sleep?’ he asked.
‘No. Maybe the new mattress, I don’t know.’
‘I can’t sleep either but my insomnia’s a fairly common occurrence. I tend to be a bit of a night owl, but I made an effort to try and sleep tonight. Didn’t want to be clanging around when you were sleeping. Come on, I’ll make us some hot chocolate, that might help.’ He flicked on the light, and she was greeted by the clear sight of his muscular torso and thick, bare thighs that were barely covered by the tight-fitting boxers he wore. ‘Nice PJs,’ he said and when she didn’t reply he glanced down at his body and state of undress, and his face coloured a similar shade to what she was wearing. ‘I’ll, erm, go stick some clothes on first.’ He disappeared back into his room and Esme made her way down the stairs to the kitchen. Thankfully the cottage was toasty warm, and she sat at the little bistro table in her cerise satin pyjamas waiting for Judd.
When he reappeared, he was wearing joggers and a t-shirt. ‘Sorry about that. Didn’t mean to scare you half to death with my pasty flesh.’ He chuckled.
‘No, it’s fine. I think we both may take a while to adjust to this situation.’
‘I’m just glad I remembered to put some boxers on. I’m a naked sleeper.’ He closed his eyes briefly. ‘Not that you needed that mental image. You’ll never sleep now.’
She laughed and shook her head. ‘Honestly, it’s fine.’
He set about making their drinks with hot milk in a pan. ‘I’m guessing your wee pal is sleeping well in her new bed.’
‘Oh, yes. Betty can sleep through most things. I was expecting her to be a little disconcerted by the move but she’s obviously tougher than me.’
‘You’ve lived away from home before, though, haven’t you? Didn’t you say you’d been travelling?’
‘I did. I sort of lived with someone though, as in the same bedroom, so it’s a bit different.’
He raised his eyebrows. ‘The heartbreaker?’
She nodded. ‘The very same,’ she replied dramatically, trying to make light of things.
‘I’m so sorry that happened to you.’ She lifted her face to find his gaze fixed on her and sincerity in his kind eyes.
She smiled and looked away. Sympathy had a way of making her emotional usually but coming from Judd it was different. Her heart skipped. ‘Thank you but I’m getting over it now.’
‘Good. Anyway, here’s your drink.’ He placed a mug before her on the table. ‘I’m pretty bloody good at hot chocolate if I do say so myself.’
She took a tentative sip of the steaming liquid and inhaled the sweet aroma. ‘Mmm… delicious.’
‘Told you, didn’t I?’
‘You weren’t wrong.’
Eventually Esme went back to bed and, before sleep took her, Judd’s body and his smile whirred around her mind in a repetitive loop. His smooth skin, angular jaw with a smattering of stubble, his smiling eyes, his smooth skin, angular jaw…
Nope. Stop it. You’re not going to find him attractive, Esme Cassidy. You can’t. Stop it now.