CHAPTER TWENTY
I watched Jokah walk toward the bleachers and rolled my eyes.
This nigga was the same rude-ass Jokah. I didn't know why I expected anything different.
Still, seeing him there did something to me.
When Cody told me Jokah promised he'd be at his game, I wasn't sure if he would keep that promise now that things between us were over.
But there he was. Looking good as fuck while acting like I barely existed.
I sat a few feet away from him and tried not to pay attention to the fact that he never looked my way. Not once. His attention stayed on Cody.
Every time Cody made a good play, the first place he looked was towards Jokah. And every single time, Jokah was watching. Meanwhile, the nigga never looked my way.
As much as Jokah got on my fucking nerves, I could never take away the way he'd treated my son.
He had been there for years. That was part of what made losing him so hard. Jokah hadn't just become a part of my life. He'd become part of Cody's too.
By the time the game ended, Cody's team had won, and somehow Jokah was the first person he wanted to celebrate with. I stood there watching the two of them together, trying not to let it bother me. But I ain’t gone lie, I was kind of jealous.
Then Cody left with him. I watched Jokah's car pull out of the parking lot with my son sitting in the passenger seat.
He never looked back and that bothered me more than anything else had.
Because nothing about today felt different for him.
He showed up for Cody, kept his promise and took him with him.
But when it came to me, there was nothing.
There were no lingering looks, jealousy or no sign that seeing me had stirred up anything.
Jokah really was moving on and I fucking hated it.
When I got home, the package was sitting where I left it.
I picked it up and carried it into my bedroom.
For a few seconds, I just stood there looking at it.
Then I tore it open. I took the box into the bathroom, opened it and pulled out the test. A few minutes later, I sat it on the counter and waited.
My heartbeat faster as I watched the little window.
One line appeared and then another, as expected.
I stared at it, laughing when it read pregnant.
I picked up my phone and took a picture.
Then I sat on the edge of my bed and looked at it again. Those two lines were about to change everything. All I had to do now was wait for Jokah to bring Cody home.
Two hours later, Jokah's car pulled into my driveway.
I looked through the blinds with a smile on my face.
Cody climbed out with a GameStop bag in one hand and his Chick-fil-A cup in the other.
Whatever he felt about me, he loved Cody.
Eleven years old or not, my son had gotten attached to him, and Jokah had gotten just as attached to Cody.
I stepped away from the window and opened the door for him. "Ma! Look what Jokah got me.”
He had a big smile on his face, as he pulled the game out of the bag.
"That's the one you wanted?"
"Yeah. And we went to Chick-fil-A."
"I see."
"I'm about to play it."
"Go ahead."
Cody took off toward his room, and I walked outside holding the pregnancy test in my hand.
Jokah was still sitting there. Maybe he was waiting on me.
I ordered the test the same day I saw that picture of him and Kaior at the ranch.
Her sitting on that horse and Jokah beside her smiling like his ass had never smiled a day in his life.
Was this crazy? Probably. Did I give a fuck?
No. But this nigga let Kaior get too comfortable.
And Jokah needed a reason to remember that I wasn't going anywhere.
I was putting my car in reverse when Shania came walking out of the house. I stopped. Here we fucking go. She walked over and motioned for me to roll the window down, so I did.
"What?"
"I need to show you something."
"If this about Cody—"
She cut me off midsentence. "It's not."
She pulled out a pregnancy test, and I looked at the bitch like she was crazy. I glanced at the lines of the test, then at her.
"What I'm looking at?"
She frowned.
"You know what you're looking at."
"I know what a pregnancy test looks like. I'm asking why the fuck you showing it to me."
"Because I'm pregnant."
"Congratulations."
Her mouth fell open.
"Jokah."
"What?"
"It's yours."
I looked at the test again, then back at her.
"I know you fuckin’ lying."
Her eyes widened.
"Excuse me?"
"You heard me."
"Why the fuck would I lie about being pregnant?"
"I don't know, Shania. Why the fuck do you do half the shit you do?"
"I'm serious."
"So am I."
She shook her head.
"You really think I would make this up?"
"I think you standing at my window holding a positive pregnancy test like that's supposed to prove I'm the daddy."
"You the only person I've been sleeping with!"
"According to you."
"Jokah, I haven't been with anybody else!"
"Yeah a’ight."
"A’ight? That's all you have to say?"
"What else you want?"
"I just told you we're having a baby!"
"We ain't having shit yet."
Her face twisted.
"What the fuck does that mean?"
"It means go to the doctor."
"I took a test! You're looking at it."
"And I'm looking at you too. Still don't mean I believe your ass."
She stared at me. I nodded toward the test.
"Go get that shit confirmed."
"And when the doctor confirms it?"
"Then we get a DNA test."
Her mouth fell open again.
"A DNA test?"
"That's what I said."
"You know damn well this baby is yours."
"No. You know who you been fucking. I know who I been fucking."
She looked like she wanted to slap the shit out of me. I almost wished she would.
"So, after everything we've been through, you really gonna stand here and treat me like some random bitch?"
"You the one standing at my window with a pregnancy test. I ain't come looking for you."
Her lips pressed together.
"Is this because of her?"
"Kaior ain't got shit to do with whether that baby mine."
"But that's why you're acting like this."
"Nah. I'm acting like this because me and you ain't together, and you popped up talking about you pregnant. I'm supposed to take your word for it?"
"You used to trust me."
"Used to."
That shut her up. I put the car in reverse for the second time.
"Go to the doctor."
"Jokah—"
"And don't say shit to Cody."
"I wasn't going to."
"Good."
She stepped back from the car, still holding the test, as I started backing out.
"Jokah!"
I stopped and looked at her.
"What?"
"If I'm pregnant with your baby, she's not gonna be okay with that."
I stared at her.
"That's for me and my woman to deal with."
Shania frowned when I said my woman. Yeah, I meant that shit.
"And if that baby turns out to be mine, I'll handle mine. Don't confuse that with me handling you."
I backed out of the driveway and left her ass standing there.