Chapter Nine
The three walked silently back to the cabin. Jayla walked directly to the fire and sat down in the chair, still wrapped in her borrowed coat. She saw the men walk in and out a few times, carrying sacks and a few boxes, but otherwise, she ignored them and lay her head back against the cushion.
The rustle of the logs in the fire woke her from a light sleep. She looked up to find Diego staring at her as he poked at the logs.
“Beau got you some clothes when he was in town. It’s not much. Just sweats and socks.”
She nodded. “Thank you.”
“Are you a virgin?”
Jayla sputtered, sat up quickly, and turned bright red. “Where the hell did that come from?”
“Answer my question,” he growled.
Jayla crossed her arms and raised her chin. “It’s none of your business.”
Diego bent forward, putting his hands on both sides of the chair, caging her in. “I’m making it my business.”
“I don’t fucking care.”
Beau walked in on them, sparring again, and rolled his eyes. “Diego, how about we talk this over with her, calmly?”
Jayla didn’t back down. She just stared right back at him.
She was not going to show him she cared about anything.
She never wanted them to know her feelings for them, as outrageous as they were.
She waited until Diego walked over and sat beside Beau on the sofa.
“I want you to take me to the nearest town. Preferably today.”
Diego ignored her statement. “We haven’t checked your burn in a while.”
Jayla’s gaze landed on Diego. “I’ve been taking care of it. It’s healing nicely.”
He looked doubtful but let it go for the time being. “Ribs?”
“I get a twinge every so often, and they’re tender if you push on them, but otherwise, they’re good.” She looked back and forth. Both men were scowling. “What do you want to say? Because I really need to get going.”
Beau held up the note she left. “Would you like to tell us what the ‘drive people away’ is about?”
Jayla’s throat burned, and her eyes stung as a swirl of emotions bombarded her. She took a minute to get herself under control. “Lis...” she cleared her throat. “Listen, I was just being overdramatic. I don’t see why we need to talk about this unless you just want to embarrass me or something?”
Beau’s stomach tightened. He could tell she was fighting to stay calm. He could also tell this note was more than just words. “I don’t believe you.”
A ball of fury grew inside her. She stood abruptly and turned away. Goddamn them. She spun around to face them again. She was gritting her teeth so hard her jaw hurt. “Why are you doing this? What did I ever do to you guys?”
Beau stood and took a step toward her, but stopped when her body jerked violently back. He held out his arm. “Easy.”
Jayla held her hand up, palm out. “Just stay away from me.”
“Tell us right now if you’re a virgin,” Diego growled.
Jayla threw her arms out. “Yes. There. Are you happy now? I know I’m different. I know I’m not someone people want to be around. I’ve known for a long time, but why does this matter to you guys?”
Diego stood and turned his back to them as he rubbed the back of his neck. “It matters because we both want you,” he said, but didn’t turn.
Jayla stood shocked for a complete minute before a strangled laugh burst out, then quickly turned into tears she’d held in too long. Her hands covered her face, and she bent forward as the emotional pain ripped through her.
Beau swept her up, and despite her struggles, sat down with her on the sofa and on his lap.
One of his arms was around her back, supporting her, and the other swept the hair from her face.
“We have a lot to talk about, and it sounds like there are a lot of issues we need to go over.” He pressed her against his chest and let her cry.
Diego sat down and then maneuvered himself until her legs were draped over his.
“Sshh, honey. Everything is going to be okay,” Beau crooned to her.
She started winding down a few minutes later. “Can I get up?”
Beau tightened his arms. “Not yet.”
“Can I at least have the Kleenex box?” she mumbled against his chest.
Diego leaned to the side and snatched the box off the table next to the sofa. “Here you go.”
Jayla didn’t say anything as she wiped her face and blew her nose. “I just want to say I’m sorry for the tears. Your joke caught me off guard, and I couldn’t seem to stop my laugh from turning into tears. It’s been a tiring few days.” She looked down at her hands as they twisted a tissue.
“What joke?” Beau frowned.
“About you wanting me. I would like to understand why you find it humorous to poke fun at me? Not only do I know you don’t want me, but we also wouldn’t be able to have a relationship like that.”
Diego used the side of his hand to tilt her head up. “We’ll get into the relationship aspect later, but he wasn’t lying about wanting you.”
Jayla pulled her head away. “I don’t want to play this game anymo...” her voice broke. “Please just leave me in peace and take me to town.”
Beau looked at Diego over her head. “It looks like we did more damage than we thought.”
Diego’s worried gaze stayed on her. “Jayla, when you walked out of the bathroom for the first time, it felt like someone sucker punched me. I’ve never wanted a woman—” He held up a hand when she opened her mouth.
“Wait. Just listen.” He continued when she shut her mouth.
“I have never wanted a woman the way I want you. Something you said or did tipped Beau off that you might be a virgin.” He cleared his throat.
“When I was eighteen, I met a girl I worked with, and we hit it off. She was very sweet, and I couldn’t believe she was talking to me.
You see, both Beau and I grew up in an orphanage outside of Waco, Texas. ”
“I’m sorry to hear that. I know what it’s like to be an orphan.”
“But you at least had the director,” Beau reminded her.
“No, I didn’t. Within a week of my parents’ deaths, he shipped me off to an all-girls boarding school on the opposite end of the US.”
The men looked at each other and wondered what reason he had to do that. Beau glanced at Diego quickly before putting his gaze on her. “Maybe he had reason.”
Jayla laughed without a bit of humor. “Oh, he did. He didn’t want me around.”
“I can’t see it. The director sounded very concerned about your welfare.” Diego bent to see her eyes. “I don’t think we imagined it.”
“Well, I have fifteen years to show how much he didn’t care. But I don’t want to talk about it anymore. Go on.”
“Anyway, the girl’s name was Trisha, and everything seemed to be going well for several months. The only thing I was sad about was Beau, and I always said we’d want to share our women. The few times I hinted at it, she blew up.”
Jayla’s shocked gaze went from one to the other. “Let me get this straight. You both, together, want a relationship with one woman at the same time?”
Beau nodded. “It happens more than you think, Jayla. Just keep an open mind for now.”
Diego cleared his throat. “She finally got comfortable enough for us to have sex. Just her and I. She was a virgin. I’d never had sex with a virgin, and I was really careful, or so I thought. Everything seemed normal. We had sex a few more times over the course of a few weeks.
“I stopped at her apartment on a Sunday. We’d seen each other the night before. Everything looked fine until I found her in the tub. She’d cut her wrists and bled out. She was cold and stiff, so I knew she’d done it soon after I left the night before.”
Jayla gripped one of his hands. Her heart broke for him. No one should have to see that, especially if you cared for them. “I’m so sorry, Diego. She must have been really troubled.”
“She left a note.”
Jayla knew it wasn’t good from the tone of his voice.
“She said she couldn’t take being with me anymore, that everything was too painful.”
“That’s sad. Something was going on in her life for her to take such drastic measures. Did she have family around?”
“Yeah, a mother, stepdad, and little sister. Why?”
“What did they say?”
Diego shrugged. “I don’t know. They never knew about me.”
“So, what about her being a virgin has to do with this?”
“She talked about how painful the first time was a few weeks before she took her life.”
“What about the times after you had sex for the first time?”
Diego thought back. “She always acted as if she enjoyed it.”
Jayla relaxed against Beau without realizing it. “Have you ever thought about her not talking about physical pain, but mental?”
Diego’s chest visibly jerked. “What do you mean?”
“Women are more emotionally sensitive than men. We handle physical pain a lot better than emotional. Ask yourself this. Why would she continue to have sex with you if it hurt so much?”
Diego frowned. “I asked myself that many times, but I just never figured it out.”
“I wasn’t there, but I took enough psychology courses to guess it had nothing to do with you. She was a very depressed woman to do something so drastic.”
Diego sat silently for a long moment. “Jesus. I’ve been thinking it was something I did all this time. Maybe I could have prevented...”
Jayla shook her head. “No. She would have done it again. You couldn’t fix her. She would have needed an extensive amount of therapy for it to help. I’m sorry.”
The three sat quietly, lost in their own thoughts.