Chapter 33
Maple
‘Hey, is this a maple tree?’ Dylan asks, inspecting the jagged edges of the leaves as he shuffles back against a thick branch.
My face blushes. I don’t know why. It’s the only tree at the intersection of our road. But now that he’s noticed, I feel like I’m aura farming.
‘I don’t know,’ I lie. ‘Maybe.’
He smiles. ‘Nature really isn’t your thing, hey?’
‘I guess not.’
He laughs. ‘So what is your thing, Maybe Maple?’
The bark on the tree is smooth, almost shiny, and as I lean back against the branch to consider Dylan’s question, I feel its warmth on my back.
It’s true that maple trees don’t usually require much skill or nerve to climb.
But there was one in the park near our last house, and I would love climbing that when I was a little kid.
Does that mean I was into nature like the twins back then? Did we all miss that about me?
‘I guess clothes mainly,’ I say, knowing it’s not true. My mom provides my wardrobe – with Maddie’s help. ‘Makeup, skin products, jewelry, you know,’ I continue, as though it might help convince us both.
Dylan nods. ‘Well, I guess that makes sense, with how your channel is.’
His words are neutral, but he looks disappointed, and it makes me want to tell him the truth.
That I don’t really care about any of that stuff.
But then he would ask what I do care about, and I’d have to admit there’s nothing.
That I’m so busy being Maybe Maple for my subscribers, and my mom, and Maddie, and our mortgage payments, that I don’t have time to think about who I really am.
‘How do you think the twins will take the news about their social media ban?’ Dylan asks, reading the silence – correctly – as a sign to move on. ‘Not sure I’d have loved a no YouTube rule when I was their age.’
‘If it gets that far,’ I say. ‘In our family, Mom always gets her way.’ I think about that video again, the sticker – FIRST KISS!!
‘Well, I hope your dad gets a win on this,’ Dylan says quietly.
He drops his head forward, ruffles his hair.
I’ve noticed he does this when he’s embarrassed, or unsure about something, like when he told me he wants to be a human rights lawyer.
I built up a certain picture of Dylan Dope from his Instagram posts, but he’s not really that guy at all.
‘Are you going to talk to your dad?’ I ask. ‘About making less content and having more time to study?’
He shakes his head, then looks up at the higher branches and smiles.
‘Sadly, my dad is nothing like yours. Not exactly the introspective type. He’d never think about how social media could be damaging, especially not when there’s all those dollars to be made.
Shit knows what he’s going to think about your mom’s latest prank.
He might love it; he might hate it. Either way though, he’s gonna have an opinion. ’
‘You make out like my dad’s a saint,’ I say.
‘But I’m in the same boat you are. And at least your dad has a job.
I’m the only one earning anything in my family.
’ From nowhere, I feel my eyes grow hot and I blink to fan them cool.
‘You know, it’s weird,’ I go on. ‘Hearing him so desperate to protect the twins when he said nothing like that about me when I was their age.’ I swallow.
‘It’s almost like he loves them more than me. ’
Dylan drops his gaze to look at me. ‘Listen, it won’t be that,’ he says.
‘Remember, six years ago, when you were eight, kids being on social media was only about the upsides. The fun, the popularity, and the “oh wait, we can make money out of this too?” Your dad had no reason to worry back then, did he? No context for it.’
‘And now?’ I push.
‘Well, you’re older now. And you heard him. He thinks that you love it too much to stop. He probably thinks you’re a pro too, that you can handle the bad shit.’
‘I’m not sure I can,’ I admit in a whisper.
‘No, of course you can’t. Because it’s impossible to. Social media is a colossus. No one can control it or outsmart it, and especially not a bunch of minors. Just look at what happened to Ella Hart.’
Ella Hart. I know the name, of course, but I haven’t heard it spoken in a while.
Ella is the eldest child of the Hart family, who are huge influencers on YouTube – their @7Harts channel has got over eight million subscribers.
They live in Austin, Texas, and are all blond-haired, blue-eyed and super cute.
Ella’s a talented dancer, and she went to London in England to follow her dreams.
‘What do you mean?’ I ask. ‘What happened to Ella Hart?’