Chapter 10 Giselle
GISELLE
When we arrived to the log cabin—make that log mansion—Kincaid had rented for Kason, we were greeted by two massive security guards in black cargo pants and black long-sleeve shirts.
They informed Kason that they’d just swept the interior of the home and assured him that one of them would be with us at all times, while the other would remain outside in an unmarked vehicle.
Their presence definitely eased my trepidation about entering the unfamiliar home.
Inside the house, everything was modern-rustic. The wide-open floor plan—complete with kitchen, dining room, and living room—took up the entire main floor. Three overstuffed leather sofas formed a U in front of the huge brick fireplace.
Shay scurried toward the bathroom while Kason and Thayer dropped onto the sofas.
“Gotta love Kincaid,” Jesse said as he opened the fridge that was stocked with food and beverages. He took three bottles of beer into the living room and passed them out to Kason and Thayer. They cracked open their bottles and lifted them in a silent-cheers before tipping them back.
I stood there, feeling awkward with my bag in my hand and my headphones on despite my music being off. “I’m gonna go find my room,” I said, before making my way toward the stairs.
“Hold up,” Kason called. “What’s the plan for tonight?” he asked everyone.
“Pick up girls?” Jesse mused.
Thayer laughed as he looked to Kason. “Did you say you wanted to get some runs in tonight?”
“Could grab some killer footage,” Kason said.
The thought of them leaving the house sent alarm bells wailing in my head. I didn’t want the boys to go. And, though I’d never admit it to them, I needed them around.
Realistically, I knew Shay and I were strong. I also knew security was right outside. But it didn’t mean I didn’t jump at every noise or worry that a masked man would step out from every closed door.
“Wanna go find our room?” Kason asked Shay as she came out of the bathroom.
“Sure,” she smiled as Kason jumped to his feet and they made their way upstairs with me on their heels.
Safety in numbers.
“I guess that leaves you and me, bro,” Jesse said to Thayer.
Once we reached the second floor, Kason pointed to the room at the end of the hallway. “That one’s yours.”
“Where are you guys staying?” I asked, trying not to sound as alarmed as I suddenly felt in this unfamiliar place.
He nodded to the first room on the right. “This is where the magic happens.”
Shay playfully bumped him with her shoulder, but he didn’t budge. “Don’t be crude.”
He laughed, and I couldn’t be sure it was her words or the fact that she thought she could move him with her shoulder.
“We could watch a movie or something while they’re out,” Shay said to me.
I tilted my head. “I’m kinda beat.”
She forced an understanding smile. “Yeah. Of course. Get some rest. If you change your mind, I’ll be downstairs.”
I nodded, appreciating her offer but knowing once I was inside that room, there was no chance I’d be leaving it. I hadn’t been lying when I said I was beat. I just left out the fact that I was also overwhelmed, overstimulated, and terrified of my own shadow.
Thayer
We stumbled into the house a little after one. Snowboarding, then drinking in the lodge, had proven to be a lethal combination.
“Shhhh,” Kason said, closing the door quietly behind us. “Let’s not wake the girls.”
The security guard, who’d remained at the house with the girls, ignored us. I wondered if he was silently cursing his job.
I glanced at the stairs, knowing that Giselle was likely sound asleep upstairs. Once Kason got into his room, there was little chance she’d be able to sleep. Kason was a loud drunk.
To be honest, I was shocked she even agreed to come on this trip. She’d kept her headphones on the entire plane and car ride, then disappeared upstairs as quickly as she could. For her, this trip was not about having fun. It was about escaping Colorado.
“I’m exhausted,” I said, shedding my coat and hanging it on a coat hook by the front door. “What time are we heading out in the morning?”
“Let’s aim for eight. Lifts don’t run until then anyway,” Kason said, before disappearing upstairs.
“Want a beer?” Jesse asked on his way over to the fridge.
“Nah, man. I’m beat. I’m gonna sleep this off so I’m ready to shred in the morning.” I hadn’t tried any tricks on the mountain, but I’d eyed the jump, knowing I’d attempt some in the morning, and hoping like hell I didn’t break anything.
“I’m stoked I’m getting a front row seat to Thayer Caruthers’ comeback tour,” Jesse said, twisting off the cap and taking a pull of his beer.
“I just want to get out there and see what happens.”
“There’s no doubt that Kincaid’ll offer you a sponsorship deal if you’re serious.”
“I think that ship has sailed.” At one time, it was me who had sponsors watching. Now I was just a has-been.
“Dude, you’re as rad on a board as Kason. You just gotta shake off some of the rust.”
I held my hand to my heart. “Jesse? Are we having a moment?”
“Fuck off.”
“And just like that, the moment’s over,” I said.
Jesse laughed as I took off for the stairs. “See you in the AM.”
“Night.”
I headed down the second-floor hallway, where Shay’s soft laughter trickled out from behind the closed door on my right.
I shook my head and kept moving. The open door on the left belonged to Jesse, who’d likely pass out on the sofa and never make it upstairs.
I noticed Giselle’s door was closed at the end of the hallway.
I moved toward the room next to hers. It was the smallest one, but I didn’t need more than the queen-size bed and dresser.
As soon as I stepped over the threshold of my room, I heard a whimper.
I froze, listening to see if I heard it again or if I’d imagined it.
I didn’t hear it again, so I figured it was nothing.
I took two more steps into my room when another whimper stopped me.
I backed out of my room and went to Giselle’s door, pressing my ear gently against it.
When I heard another whimper, I clutched the knob and cracked open the door, surprised to find it unlocked.
Giselle lay in the center of the king-sized bed, curled into a ball on her side, facing away from me. As if she was crying—or worse—terrified, another whimper escaped her.
I closed the door quietly behind me and crept over to the bed. I stood there staring down at her, having no idea what I should do. Scratch that. What I should’ve done was turn around and get Kason. But then, I’d need to explain why the hell I was in his sister’s room to begin with.
Another whimper escaped her.
Fuck it.
I pushed off my sneakers and lifted the covers, so fucking worried I was going to startle her.
Everything in me told me to stop what I was doing.
To get out of that room. But I couldn’t.
I carefully slipped under the covers and moved closer.
“I’ve got you, G,” I said as I wrapped my arms around her.
She tensed for a beat, and then relaxed in my arms.
A long silence passed, and I prayed she’d fallen back asleep. I hadn’t expected to do this all night. I just knew I needed to make her pain stop.
“You don’t call me that anymore,” she whispered.
“You don’t like it,” I reminded her.
“I didn’t like it in high school in front of the senior boys,” she said. “But I liked that you chose it for me.”
More silence passed. “Is it okay I came in here? You sounded like you were crying.”
She sighed. “I was having a nightmare.”
“Do they happen often?”
I felt her shrug.
“Do you want me to leave?” I offered.
“Do you wanna leave?” she asked.
“I wanna know you’re okay.”
“I’m not sure I’ll ever be okay,” she admitted.
Fuck me. I tightened my arms around her, inhaling her scent. “You’re gonna be okay, G. Kason and I won’t ever let anyone hurt you again.”
“That’s an impossible assurance.”
“Don’t you know your brother?”
A small chuckle left her lips.
“He made you come away with us, didn’t he?” I continued.
“You mean, I wasn’t invited because I bring the fun?” she asked, trying to make a joke.
“Well, that too.”
“Liar.”
I didn’t respond.
“My mom told me you stopped by to check on me,” she said.
“Yeah. I just wanted to make sure you were…you know.”
“Did she tell you where I was?”
“No.”
“I was able to get in to see a therapist,” she admitted.
“Oh.”
“Yeah, oh,” she said, and I wondered how many people she’d shared that information with.
“Did it help?”
“I’m not sure anything’s going to help me to forget.”
The thought of her never being able to move on seemed impossible to me.
Especially since she was always so strong and confident.
How could one experience crush her spirit indefinitely?
“I don’t think the therapist’s job is to help you forget.
I think they’re supposed to show you that you’re strong enough to persevere despite what happened to you. ”
She didn’t respond right away, so I wondered if she was calling bullshit on my thought. “Can I tell you something?” she eventually asked.
“Of course.”
“When I was on the floor with the belt around my wrists…” her voice drifted off.
“Jesus,” I whispered, hating that he’d fucking bound her. I coasted my thumbs over her wrists, needing to soothe whatever pain the memory elicited.
“I was sure I wasn’t getting out of there alive.”
I closed my eyes, hating that those terrible thoughts had crossed her mind.
“I was praying that someone would see me on the floor and come in and save me…”
“Of course you did,” I said, understanding it’s what anyone would have been praying for.
“I thought about the police…and Kason…and you,” she admitted.
My stomach dipped. “Me?”
I felt her nod next to me.
So many questions sat at the ready. Why had she wanted me there? Why not her boyfriend? “I wish I would’ve been there.”
“You make me feel safe, Thayer,” Giselle said, her voice growing quieter. “You always have.”
“I didn’t know that,” I said, blindsided by her admission.