Chapter 5 #2
Jayden gives me a sidelong look. “Your Mom cheated and now you think you need to spice things up to keep me faithful too? You don’t need to do that, Lexi.”
I don’t want to fight with him, ever, but especially not now, and I want to just apologize profusely and end this, but I also want to tell him to stop overanalyzing.
“If I could take back talking dirty to you, I would, believe me. You’re making this into such a big deal.
” I don’t mean to sound cruel—I just wish we could stop picking everything apart.
A long moment of silence follows. I want to get up now and go home to my own apartment where I don’t have to dance around my words and there’s no cat plotting my death.
“I’m sorry,” Jayden finally says. “I got into my head about your parents. It wasn’t you, it was me, and my outburst was annoying.”
“It’s okay,” I say, because honestly, I’m too emotionally drained to spend even another moment talking about a sentence that had no ill intent behind it.
Jayden rolls back onto his side and wraps me up in his arms. “I’m going to take a shower. Wanna join me?”
I kiss my finger and press it against his forehead, which is something he usually does to me, and he smiles at the gesture. “You go ahead. I’ll shower later.”
When he leaves the room, I stare at the ceiling thinking about how I’m going to tell my sister that I think our mom’s too far in lust to be swayed away from Nicholas.
I imagine Gia’s tears tonight. Her sadness about most likely not having the crucial number two on her list. My dad’s tears when I finally feel like I can face him.
Am I willing to back down without even trying at all?
Is one experience of seeing Mom looking happy and satisfied enough for me to just give up on my mission altogether?
I sit up and grab my phone from the nightstand.
I can’t keep avoiding this. Someone needs to check on Dad.
He could be a complete heartbroken mess right now.
I pull up my contacts and my finger hovers over his name.
I’ve never hesitated this long to call my dad or agonized this much over what I was going to say to him.
I suck in a deep breath, click on his name, and call him.
It rings four times and I’m ready to end the call knowing that I gave it somewhat of a try, but then I hear his voice. “Hello?”
“Dad.”
“Hi, Lexi. How are you doing?”
“Okay . . .” I say tentatively. Mom made me break the news to Gia and there’s no way in hell I’m going to break the news to Dad too. I’ll be able to tell within a few minutes if he knows, and if he doesn’t, I’m going to make sure Mom fills him in on that small little detail. Today.
“Are you okay?” Dad asks. “Is something happening?”
“Are you okay?” I say pointedly.
“Oh . . . she told you.” Dad’s voice wavers slightly and it hurts my heart.
I pull on a stray thread hanging from the corner of Jayden’s comforter. “She did. How are you . . . doing?”
“It’s hard . . .” Dad begins. “I’m trying to keep busy.”
“I can’t believe it. She’s going through something. It’ll pass, don’t you think? She’ll realize she’s making a mistake.”
Dad sighs and for a few quiet seconds I think he might be crying.
“Dad?” I say softly.
“There’s a lot you don’t know . . .” Dad begins.
“Mom said that too. What do you mean by that?”
“I don’t really know how to say it. I feel like I need to talk to you face-to-face.”
Okay, good. I’ve been putting this off, but it’ll be good to see him in person and gauge how he’s really doing. “How about today?” I suggest.
“I can’t. I have to figure some things out first . . . but another day?”
I can’t believe this. Dad’s probably trying to make sure he can compose himself before he agrees to meet me.
The only time I’ve seen Dad cry was when his father passed away.
He tried to hide it by staying in his and Mom’s room but I could hear him crying through the wall, and my heart broke for him.
He’s always tried to be strong and stoic but something major like this . . . ? It’s obviously too much for him.
“Dad. It’s okay to be emotional. If I come see you and you’re sad, it’s more than understandable. You know that, right?”
“And you’re the best. You know that, Lexi?” he responds, his voice almost breaking. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
“Talk to you again soon. Bye.”
I stare at my phone. My parents and I are incredibly close, and the past few months without seeing them have felt lonely and strange. Our Sunday dinners were always the highlight of my week, and I barely ever missed one. I’m just realizing that two months ago had been our last.
Nothing seemed particularly off that day, but now that I think about it, Dad seemed a little distracted, though he kept insisting he hadn’t slept well.
Mom usually baked a meat pie and made garlic mashed potatoes and grilled asparagus, but for that last dinner, she ordered in pizza, and I remember thinking it was strange because she barely ever ordered food and when she did, it was always the same type: Deluxe, with cheese, pepperoni, mushrooms, and green peppers, from Nonna’s Secret.
This time, she ordered gourmet pizzas: Neapolitan, Caprese, and Tuscan, from some place I’ve never heard of before called Crust Issues . . . which figures.
The water’s still running, and I can hear Jayden singing in the shower, an off-key version of “We Are the Champions,” from what it sounds like. I sit cross-legged on the bed, the resolve to fix stuff with my family coming back to me in a rush of adrenaline.
I’m going to find out as much as I can about this Nicholas Wrenford guy.
If I scour the web long enough, will I dig up dirt on him?
Most likely. Criminal convictions? Hopefully.
Dating in the twenty-first century is less about romance than it is about dodging jailbirds, mobsters, and anyone with a suspiciously perfect Instagram feed.
If Mom finds out that her lover boy has a checkered past, I’m positive she’ll realize that she’s making a mistake. Why would she want to jeopardize what she has with her husband for a potential criminal?
I’m going to find some dirt on this jerk if it’s the last thing I do.