Chapter 12
Kennedy
That day I stayed in my bedroom thinking about the fact that in a couple of hours I'd be back home to my depressing life. That meant I wouldn't see Elijah and Jasper every day when I woke up, and sex would be a thing of the past.
Back to being the daughter who disappointed everyone. Back to pretending I didn't know what it felt like to be wanted.
I couldn't see myself joining the dating pool anytime soon after what I shared with these two men.
In fact, I hoped that we'd become more than friends eventually.
That they'd stay true to their word about keeping the connection.
I couldn't help fearing that once they got back to their normal lives, I'd be just a memory to them.
A vacation fling. Nothing more.
"Knock knock." I looked up to find Elijah standing at my door.
"Hi," I said, sitting up in bed.
"Hey." He stepped inside. "You hiding in here?"
"Maybe."
"From us or from leaving?"
"Both. Neither. I'm not sure."
He came to sit beside me on the bed. "What's got you staring at the ceiling in thought?"
I smiled. "Just thinking that today is our last day together."
"Last day here," he corrected gently.
"Right."
"Does that make you sad?"
I looked over at his gentle blue eyes. "Well, if I'm being honest, yes it does."
"How sad? Scale of one to ten."
"Eleven."
He pulled in a breath. "Yeah. Me too."
"You mean it?"
"Absolutely."
He put his arm around me and pulled me close. "Don't be. This isn't goodbye, and if you decide to work in the city, we could see each other a lot more often."
Never once thinking about that part, I nodded. "You're right."
But would I have the courage to choose that? To move to the city, away from my parents' expectations?
"What are you thinking?"
"Just... wondering if I'll actually have the guts to make that choice. To take this seriously."
"Take us seriously, you mean."
"Yeah. You and Jasper."
He shifted closer to me. "I don't plan on staying away, Kennedy."
"Even if I stay with my parents? Work at my dad's firm?"
"Even then. We'll make it work."
"Promise?"
"I promise."
Staring into his blue eyes, I nodded. "I'm happy to hear that because that's exactly what I feared."
That you'd forget me. That this week meant more to me than it did to you.
He reached for my face and traced his thumb across my cheek.
I swallowed, lowering my gaze. "I had sex with Jasper earlier," I confessed, feeling the need to let him know.
The words tumbled out before I could stop them. I needed to know if this changed things, if wanting both of them was too much.
Elijah paused, his throat bobbing. "You did?"
I nodded. "It all happened so fast…"
"This morning?"
"Yeah. On our walk."
"On the trail?"
"In the forest."
His eyes darkened slightly. "Jesus."
"Are you mad?"
He met my gaze. "Did you enjoy it?"
My cheeks flamed. "I did."
"Then why would I be mad?"
"I thought you might—"
"Good."
"Good?"
"Yeah. Good. I'm glad you enjoyed it."
"You're not jealous?"
"Of Jasper? No. He's my best friend. And you..." He paused. "You can have both of us, Kennedy. That's the point."
I bit my lip. "I wish I was ready to take both of you at once."
The fantasy I'd written about. The one that got me here in the first place.
"You will be. When you're ready."
"What if I'm never ready?"
"Then we'll figure something else out."
"You'd be okay with that?"
"There's no rush. We'll always be here for when you are. There's no pressure, Kennedy."
"None?"
"None."
I smiled, leaning into him. He trailed his hands down my shoulders and then to my bare legs. "I bet you're sore now. I know Jasper likes it rough."
My heart skipped a beat. "I am, but I love the feeling. At least when I get home there'll be a physical reminder that I had the best week of my life."
"Just a week?" he asked quietly.
"What do you mean?"
"I'm hoping it's more than just a week. That this is the start of something, not the finish."
My throat tightened. "Me too."
He pulled in a breath and sighed. "I hate that I'm hard for you right now."
Surprised, I sat up, my eyes widening when I saw the bulge in his shorts. My gaze snapped up to him, and I raised a brow.
"I'm too sore to have sex, but I can go down on you."
He shook his head. "As tempting as it sounds, I think I'll just have a cold shower."
"Elijah."
"Kennedy."
"I want to."
I got up from the bed and pulled my hair into a ponytail.
"No, let me. I want to taste you in my mouth before I leave."
One last time. One last memory to take with me.
"Kennedy…"
"Please."
He searched my face. "You're sure?"
"I'm sure."
I was already reaching for the hem of his shorts, a smile on my face.