Tiny Things
REESE
Reese: Just pulled into Buy, Buy Baby.
Miles: Godspeed.
Reese: If I don’t make it out, tell people I walked into their board book section and died trying to decide if they needed to be sorted alphabetically or by shape and size.
Miles: You say that like you wouldn’t enjoy it.
Igrin as I slide my phone into my purse, leave my Cipher Springs Middle School lanyard in my car, and head inside. He knows me entirely too well.
The automatic doors whoosh open, carrying with them that unmistakable baby-store smell of new plastic, baby powder, and expensive dreams. Charlie is already inside, bouncing on the balls of her feet, holding a clipboard and a pastel pink folder, radiating enough excitement to power the store’s lighting.
She’s been in charge of the baby shower for her brother, Jace, and his wife Mackenzie for all of three days, and she already has a color-coded planning system that I suspect includes tabs, sub-tabs, and emergency tabs.
I give her a quick hug, then she says, “Okay, so we’re helping Mackenzie decide on things to finish her registry, and while we’re shopping, we’ll be finalizing the shower. Theme, food, games, favors, decorations, who’s bringing what—the whole thing.”
“I heard ‘shopping,’” Mackenzie’s best friend, Livi, says as she joins us. “The rest of those words felt less important.”
Zoe, who is dating Miles’s twin, Ledger, comes next, and finally Mackenzie.
We all drift around her like planets settling into orbit around the very pregnant center of this little solar system.
Baby Lancaster is about four weeks from making her appearance, and Mackenzie somehow looks both adorable and exhausted at the same time.
“How are you feeling?” I ask.
She rests a hand on her stomach and smiles. “Like this child has recently discovered elbows.”
“I bet she’ll be a kickboxer,” Zoe says.
“She’s sure been practicing for it. Yesterday, one of her feet managed to find a rib.”
“Okay,” Livi says, clapping her hands together once. “Should we get this party started?”
We all look out at what feels like acres of baby items. It blows my mind that there are enough baby things to fill a store this big.
Livi already has the store’s app open, and Zoe scoots in close to study the store’s layout. As she’s pointing at different things, she says, “Entrance. Emergency exits. Bathrooms. Baby gadgets.”
Charlie is holding back a smile as she says, “We’re not trying to case the joint.”
Zoe looks up and mumbles. “Sorry. Old habits.”
Old habits? Zoe works as a corporate investigator. Something to do with internal fraud and workplace misconduct. When we all head off toward the nursery section, I get into step with Charlie and lean in to ask, “Did Zoe used to be a thief or something?”
She laughs quietly. “No. Her job just used to involve a lot more… on-site investigations and situational awareness.”
I only vaguely understand what Zoe’s profession even is. I just nod.
We head off toward the baby clothes first, because what’s more fun than looking at miniature versions of pajamas and sundresses and swimsuits?
Mackenzie gasps when we reach a rack of little zippered footies on tiny hangers. “I love when the little feet part sticks straight out like this! How are babies’ feet just the cutest?”
They must be, because I found some pink and red Nikes that look like they might fit a newborn.
The fluttering at taking in the cuteness lasts about four seconds before it starts to hurt, and I turn away.
Mackenzie finds quite a few things to scan for her registry before we move on to comparing diaper bags, pushing around a bunch of different strollers, and then marveling (and laughing at) so many of the baby gadgets.
Charlie holds up a box. “Check this out—it’s a warmer for baby wipes!”
I lean in to look at it. “Oof. A sixty-dollar warmer for wipes. Who knew babies were so expensive?”
Zoe takes one look at it and shrugs. “Cold wipes build character.”
“This is a white noise machine,” Mackenzie says as she picks up a box.
“It’ll probably come in handy, because then the baby won’t wake up from a nap every time you vacuum.
” She reads the box for a moment, then says, “Huh. One of the sounds is a vacuum. And a hair dryer?! Who even discovered using a hair dryer would help a baby sleep? Was I supposed to know this? Did you guys know this?”
I shake my head. “I didn’t even know that diaper cream applicator spatulas and shopping cart hammocks were a thing until this moment.”
Livi is just looking at Mackenzie, smiling. “Ahh. I think this might be the expression of a woman who just realized that she might not know as much as she thought she knew about taking care of babies.”
Mackenzie sets the box back on the shelf and scans its code to add it to her registry. “I help with my little niece so much I thought I would be a pro. I’m going to fail at this, aren’t I?”
“I think that’s probably normal,” Charlie says as she pulls out her phone, typing a text. “I’m pretty sure every parent hits this stage and worries they’re going to fail at it.”
“So, it’s going to get better then?”
Charlie looks at her phone as a text response comes in. “My mom says she hasn’t stopped worrying that she’s going to fail at it yet, but she’s sure it’ll pass before too much longer.”
I chuckle as Mackenzie’s eyes go comically wide. Then I pull out my own phone when I feel the buzz of a text.
Miles: How is shopping going?
Reese: Hypothetically…
How many stuffed bees is too many stuffed bees?
You know. For Jace and Mackenzie’s baby.
Miles: Hypothetically? Three.
Reese: …
Miles: How many have you found?
Reese: That’s not important right now.
But they are adorable, and I am definitely coming back to get them before the shower. Every baby should have some stuffed bees in his or her nursery.
We wander down another aisle, and I stop to pick up a package that confused me at first glance. “Oh, these are pacifier wipes! Huh. I thought you were just supposed to wash them.”
Zoe picks up an object near the pacifier wipes, turning it around and around. “No, apparently you’re supposed to also sanitize them. It’s like they have their own little tanning bed.”
Miles is going to get a kick out of this. I pull my phone back out to text him.
Reese: Zoe found something that sterilizes pacifiers using lasers.
Miles: If it starts asking for a retinal scan, walk away quickly.
Reese: [saluting emoji]
Miles: It sounds like you’re all having fun.
Reese: We are. Zoe is evaluating everything for how it would hold up in extreme circumstances. The turning radius of strollers. The weight distribution of baby carriers. How fast you’d be able to find something in one of the pockets in a diaper bag.
Miles: Sounds about right.
Reese: Charlie is aww-ing at every miniature version of everything. Sunglasses. Rain boots. Bathrobes. Hair (or head, since most babies are bald) accessories. All while trying to get everyone to decide on details for the shower.
I notice through my peripheral vision that the group is moving toward the cribs, and I follow along as I text.
Reese: Livi is the master at giving shopping advice. When each of the big things will go on sale next, if something is a good price, which brand has the best ratings, and if another store would be better for some items.
Reese: I asked her how she knows so much about shopping for babies, and she said she has spreadsheets for her research. That made Charlie get choked up and look at Livi like she was seeing her in a whole new light before throwing her arms around her in a hug.
Reese: Then Livi admitted that the spreadsheets are all just stored in her head, and now Charlie is eyeing her like she can’t figure out whether that still counts or if it is extra impressive.
Miles: My money’s on “Extra impressive.”
Reese: Charlie still looks undecided.
Miles: Give her a minute. She’s recalibrating.
Reese: Oh, and Mackenzie is scanning away.
I think her registry is at the point of needing chapters by now.
Not to mention her list of things to come back and get when Jace is with her.
That, and she’s second-guessing how ready she is to take care of the baby when it’s on the outside and not nearly as easy to care for as when it’s on the inside.
Miles: Has anyone reminded her that the baby has literally never done this before either?
I laugh and look up to see all four women just standing there, not moving, looking at me. Mackenzie has a jar of nipple cream in her hand that I’m not even sure she realizes she’s holding.
“What?”
None of them say anything for a moment, then Zoe puts a hand on her hip. “When are you and Miles going to just admit you’re in love and start dating already?”
“Zoe, I’m not in love with Miles. He’s just my best friend.”
Zoe raises an eyebrow.
She clearly doesn’t believe me, and I suddenly feel the need to defend myself. “I’m not.”
“Okay.”
“I’m not. If I were in love with Miles, would I be fine with him dating other women?” Mic drop right there. “I’m always fine with him dating.”
“Of course you are,” Charlie says. “Because Miles never actually keeps dating anyone.”
“But would you be fine if he dated someone for real?” Livi asks. “If he had an actual girlfriend?”
I have a hard time even picturing it. My go-to is to not picture it or even think about it, and instead, joke it away. It always works for me. “Sure. As long as she appreciates color-coded library shelves.”
“We’re not talking one dinner or one gala date,” Mackenzie says. “A real relationship. Someone he calls first with news, or because he wants to hang out, or because he wants to talk about his day.”
“Someone he brings to Monday night family dinners,” Zoe says.
“Or,” Livi says, “someone whose texts he responds to before yours.”
“Someone who becomes his new favorite person,” Charlie says in a quieter voice.