Chapter 10
10
B ree needed to talk to Kade about the baby and explain her relationship with Zeke. She didn’t even know where to start. However, she didn’t want to do it here, not like this. “Me not wanting you to go is selfish. I don’t want you to rearrange your life for me.”
“I’m not leaving you alone while that…” he seemed to be biting his tongue, “sick jerk is out there.”
A shiver raced down Bree’s spine thinking about him . About the fact that she’d most likely been right about him being inside her home. That he’d slipped inside her neighborhood unnoticed. How could she ever go back there? How would she ever feel safe again? “I’ll get an alarm and a dog. Something big and protective. A Rottweiler.”
“Dogs take time to train.” It was hard enough to turn Kade down with him there, being her support. She feared he was going to resent her when she told him the truth that Zeke knew Kade was the baby’s father all along.
“I can’t imagine going back there.” She hated the shakiness in her voice. “You’ve already done so much for me. I wouldn’t be alive if not for you, Kade. I can’t ask you to give up your future to babysit me. I’ll stay with a friend until I get my sea legs back.”
The look—of protectiveness? determination? possessiveness?—he gave her sent tingles of electricity swirling through her.
“You didn’t ask, sweetheart.” He squeezed her hand. “And I’m not leaving unless you tell me to.”
She couldn’t. Not when there was so much left unsaid between them. “Then okay.” A couple of days might give her time to find the words that had escaped her up until now. Despite Zeke’s adamant warning otherwise, Kade deserved to know the truth. All of it.
Bree had no idea how many hours had passed between waking up and being cleared to leave the hospital. It was seven o’clock in the morning when the nurse brought in a wheelchair and announced Bree had been cleared to go home. Kade had insisted that he be the one to drive her.
Pulling in front of her house—the place she used to feel like was home—Bree’s chest seized with panic.
Kade stopped his truck and turned to her. “You’ll be fine. You know that. Right?”
There was no feeling behind Bree’s nod of agreement. He was trying to offer reassurance, and she appreciated him for it. Her heart thundered in her chest.
The air thinned, and Bree gasped. It was like she couldn’t breathe. “I can’t do it.”
“You don’t have to.” Kade shifted the gear into reverse and backed out of the driveway. Silence sat between them as he navigated onto the farm road.
“Where are we going?” Bree asked after a long silence.
“Considering I’m in the process of selling all my stuff and my apartment is a wreck, I thought it might be best if we borrowed one of my buddy’s fishing cabins instead. It shouldn’t be a problem this time of year. I know the code to get inside, and he said I could use the place whenever I wanted. He knew I might need a place to escape for a few days and recoup. Does that sound okay?”
“I don’t care where we go, as long as it’s not my place.” Those words sounded foreign. Her home had been sacred ground. It was the first place she’d rented on her own with money she’d made.
“Deal. We should stop off and buy some necessities on the way out of town. Do you mind grabbing my phone and texting my sister to let her know where we’re headed? No one in the family will suspect anything when I’m suddenly not around. I’m known for my disappearing acts. And people will most likely think you went to stay with your family.”
“My dad.” Bree gasped. In all the exhaustion Bree hadn’t thought about calling home. Her father was dealing with so much already with the medical diagnosis. “I should call him.”
“Travis called last night, and my sister has been in contact ever since. Your dad wanted to drop everything and come. Chloe reassured him that nothing else could be done here except sit and watch you sleep.”
“Did Chloe say how my father sounded?”
“He was upset but grateful you were found in time. I’m supposed to pass on the message that he loves you.” Hearing those last two words from Kade stirred a reaction in her chest—a reaction she couldn’t afford under the circumstances. He was the one person who could shatter her heart into a thousand tiny specks of dust.
“He requested that you call when you’re up to it. He also said not to come home unless you were ready to travel. He volunteered to come here to take care of you, but Chloe promised that wasn’t necessary.”
“My dad took your sister at her word?” Surprising.
“Chloe told him I planned to stick around to make sure nothing else happened until the guy was caught.” He white-knuckled the steering wheel. “Now you see my problem. I already promised your father, and I’m a man of my word.” A cocky grin upturned the corners of his mouth.
The break in tension was a much-needed relief. Bree allowed herself a small smile. “You’re right. You win.” It was probably the stress of recent events that caused her to break out laughing. She sounded a little hysterical, even to herself. But it was like she was sighing relief for the first time. “I’ll let your sister know where we’re headed so she doesn’t worry.”
Bree located his phone and sent the text. A response immediately came back. “She said she’ll drop off the dog you told her about. She just picked him up from the airport and will redirect so she can drop him off at the cabin. Said she his name is Kimbro, and he has food.”
“She doesn’t fight fair.” He shook his head in mock disgust. “He’s being retired from his military service, and one of the men in my unit rescued him. If you’re thinking about a pet, and I use that term loosely because he’s a trained fighter, maybe he’s the right one.”
“Sounds like it would save me the work of training a puppy. I’m willing to give him a try if you think it might be a good fit.”
“All I know is that he’s a seven-year-old German Sheppard named Kimbro. He’s been through a lot. He lost hearing in one ear.” Kade’s deep baritone washed over her, bringing to life parts of her body she ought to ignore.
“Sounds like he deserves a good home.” One she could provide. Kade making sure she would be okay brought on a reaction she couldn’t afford…comfort.
He glanced over at her stomach. “At least until the baby’s born. Young kids and highly trained military dogs don’t usually mix well.”
“We can take a wait-and-see approach.” Bree settled back in her seat and fixed her gaze on the patch of road before her. She needed to remind herself he was only there because she was in trouble, not because he wanted to be with her. After what she considered the best weekend of her life, she’d been devastated when he’d been clear that he had no desire for anything more to develop between them. She’d never been one-night-stand material. It worked for some, but not for her. She needed to feel an emotional connection with someone. She’d been embarrassed to realize that had been a one-way street with Kade.
To be fair, Kade hadn’t made any promises. She’d known what she was getting into. Sort of. He’d been crystal clear. No commitments. No strings. Just mutually agreed-upon, great sex. Why had she thought it would be different with her? She’d been na?ve to think there could be more between them than smokin’ hot sex. And, damn…it had been the best sex of her life. Which would’ve been fine if her heart hadn’t gotten in the way, sending her confusing desires.
Her feelings for Kade dated back to high school when they’d started spending time together with the group. She thought maybe things were going down a path where the next logical step would be for him to ask her out. He hadn’t. Instead, graduation had come, and he’d signed up for the military. She’d figured that was that. Life moved on. She’d seen him a few times when he’d come home on leave to visit his sister. He’d rented a small apartment—big enough for one—over the Huckabee’s garage. Even in high school, there’d always been something unreachable, something distant about him. Was that the attraction?
And then he’d come home a few months ago. He’d saved her on the side of the road. The two had talked, and the next thing she knew, it was one o’clock in the morning. She’d invited him over for coffee, which had turned into three days and nights of the best conversation and food—and the most incredible sex both at her house and the fishing cabin. He’d disappeared just as quickly.
One of her closest high school friends, Zeke, had been there to pick up the pieces when she’d realized she was pregnant. She’d loved Zeke. He’d loved her but in a different way. She’d quickly realized his love was the kind that led to a proposal—the words she’d wanted to hear from Kade. Tears welled, thinking about Zeke being gone. An ache formed in her chest at his life being cut short. She thought about never seeing his smiling face walk through the front door, where he’d drop his rucksack and crack a joke that made her belly laugh. The loss was too much. The stress caused by thinking about him was probably bad for the baby, so she carefully tucked away those memories for a time when she could really grieve.
What she’d had with Zeke was totally different from what she felt for Kade. But then, she’d never felt that for anyone but him. She’d dated around and had almost gotten engaged once. But then Kade had come home to visit his sister, and she’d bumped into him at the park. Chloe had just had her child, and he was holding her son in his arms. The sight of that man with a baby in his arms had released a thousand butterflies in her stomach. He had—still had—one of those devastating smiles that proved lethal when it came to seducing her. One look from Kade sent her pulse racing. Not feeling anything close to that with the man whose proposal she’d been considering had made her realize she would never be able to take his ring.
Glancing at Kade now, her heart stuttered. She needed to let him in on the secret Zeke convinced her to keep from his best friend. She only prayed she could find the right words and not shatter his world a second time. Finding out his best friend had lied would add insult to injury.
She had to find a way to tell him.
When the time was right.
Bree had been quiet most of the way to the fishing cabin. Kade couldn’t tell whether she was too tired for conversation or at a loss for words. There was so much he needed to know about her, her and Zeke’s relationship, and about the child she was carrying. He wasn’t usually much for words when spending time with the opposite sex, but it had always been different with Bree.
He pulled into the convenience store parking lot and parked. “I’d rather you stay in the truck. I’ll lock up. It’s best if no one sees you.”
“Okay.” She leaned the seat back.
He hesitated.
“I’ll be okay.” Even with her chin up, her voice said the opposite was true. He admired her courage, and his heart took another hit at her bravery.
“This won’t take long.” Kade hopped out of the truck and hit the key fob to lock the doors. He gathered a few necessities: coffee, milk, that blueberry parfait yogurt she liked. He picked out something to make for dinner before checking out in record time and returning to his vehicle.
For those few minutes Bree was out of sight, his heart thundered in his chest, and he could hardly breathe. Leaving town at any point in the future didn’t seem like the best idea anymore. Maybe he could stay through the holidays until Bree got settled again, and he had enough time to spend with Chloe before moving on. It would give him a chance to figure out this co-parenting arrangement that needed to happen.
“That was quick.” Bree sat up and glanced around at the parking lot, which was thankfully empty.
“Got enough to get us through the night.” The thought they’d be spending the night under the same roof hit him. It should seem odd, especially under the circumstances, but it felt like the most natural thing. Seeing the vulnerability in those beautiful eyes of hers and how much his heart ached being with her again reminded him just how much of a jerk he’d been when he’d had the chance with her months ago. He’d blown that all to hell, which wasn’t a shock. Kade handled serious relationships about as often as a hot stove. He didn’t touch either one. However, this feeling of regret was new to him. Kade had always stayed in the now. He didn’t look back, didn’t regret—not until her.
Kade navigated back onto the farm road. Twenty minutes later, he pulled up next to the cabin.
“Are there any other cabins nearby?” Bree asked.
“Not for miles. The lake is a ten-minute walk, and my buddy owns three acres. We have no neighbors, which should give you and Kimbro a chance to get to know each other without other distractions.” He hopped out of the cab and hurried around to the passenger side to help her out. Bruised and cut, her face was still as beautiful as ever. Her shiny blond hair cascaded down her back. Her eyes were his favorite color of brown—dark, rich—and they faltered when she took his outstretched hand. She was smart and successful. Funny when times were lighter. And she had this smile that beamed and made him think the world was a better place than it was. Made him think he was a better person than he was when it was aimed at him.
The proof he was losing what was left of his mind came in the form of the fact that he had feelings—real feelings—for his dead best friend’s fiancée. To make matters worse, she was pregnant with Kade’s baby even though her heart belonged to Zeke. And here, Kade believed he didn’t “do” complicated.
After helping her out of the vehicle, he walked her to the door and punched in the code to unlock it. “I better go in first, just in case Kimbro isn’t happy to see us.”
Bree was practically glued to his back as he linked their fingers together. He flipped on the light and took a couple of steps into the open-concept living, dining, and kitchen, all the while searching for Kimbro.
A low growl sounded from a dark corner of the living room. Kade led Bree into the kitchen where his sister had left some dog food and treats.
“He’s in a new environment. His injury most likely makes him feel vulnerable.” Kade noticed his sister had put out a water bowl. The food bowl was on the counter, empty.
He poured the kibble into the bowl. The dry chunks made a chink, chink noise against the metal bowl. He lifted the bowl to his nose and took a sniff. “That’s God-awful. We can do a helluva lot better than this.”
He retrieved the food bags from the truck and cooked up some of the ground beef he’d bought. He sprinkled the beef on top of the dry food as he scanned the room.
The dog had stopped growling but was in a defensive posture curled up in the corner. He looked tired and a little scared. From what Kade could tell, Kimbro was a beautiful animal. He had the markings of a German Shepherd, an all-black snout, and serious eyes.
“Easy, boy,” Kade summoned his most calming voice. Any sudden movement might put the dog back on guard. He glanced toward Bree, who was putting away food items. She moved fluidly and easily despite the basketball-sized belly she carried around.
“He needs a new name.” Bree had stopped and was studying the animal. “For a new life.”
“Good idea.” The animal was alert and had that concerned look on his face that Kade figured came standard with German Shepherds.
Halfway across the room, Kade crouched low on his heels. The dog had started his low growl again, and Kade didn’t want the animal to feel cornered. That’s when a frightened dog became a dangerous one. Growing up in Saddle Junction, he’d spent his childhood around animals. He knew when to push and when to back off.
Kade set the food bowl down and slid it toward the seventy-five-pound animal. Hungry eyes stared back at him, taking in Kade and Bree with caution. “I know, big guy. You’ve had a long day. But you’re fine now. You’re gonna be okay.”
“He’s beautiful. I can’t help but think he looks so dignified and regal. I’ve always thought German Shepherds were the most beautiful dogs. What do you think about calling him Rinty after Rin Tin Tin?”
“Wasn’t he rescued during a World War by an American soldier?” Kade asked.
“That’s the one,” Bree said. “Then, he became famous in the movies.”
“Rinty.” Kade let the name sit on his tongue. He rocked his head. “It’s a good name with an even better history.”
“I thought so, too,” she said with a satisfied smile that brightened the damn room.
Slowly, purposely, Kade leaned back on his heels as Rinty inched forward toward the bowl. “That’s right, Rinty. Come on and eat. No one’s going to hurt you here.”
Rinty kept his gaze on Kade, who slowly backed away to give the dog space. Returning to the kitchen, he joined Bree. “I’d planned on making burgers with that meat.”
“I’m not hungry. I saw yogurt in the bag. I’ll probably just grab some of that.”
Kade crossed the kitchen until he was standing in front of Bree. Her hip was leaning against the counter, her hand planted behind her. And when her gaze locked onto his, all rational thought flew out the window. He brought the back of his hand up to her cheekbone. “I should’ve told you this before, but I couldn’t stand it if something worse had happened to you.”
She stared up at him with those beautiful dark roast-colored eyes that he wanted to get lost in. “I’m here now because you saved me.”
He ran his finger along her jawline, noticing how husky his own voice had just become. He’d thought of her too many times since that weekend. He’d wanted to be here, holding her, lying in bed in a tangle of sheets instead of in the desert. The only thing that had stopped him from contacting her had been the fact he’d known on a bone-deep level he would end up hurting her. She deserved better.
He could feel her rapid pulse as he traced his finger along her jawline and then down the tender skin of her throat. He cupped the nape of her neck and rubbed circles with the pad of his thumb. “I think about you, about us—”
A mix of emotions played out behind those brown eyes. Frustration? Sadness? “You were pretty clear about what you wanted, Kade. Or should I say what you didn’t want— me .”
“I never said I didn’t want you.” Only that he didn’t “do” more than a weekend here and there. Only that she deserved better.
Bree’s full pink lips parted. Her tongue darted across her bottom lip, her nervous tell. And her eyes blinked up at him. “Kiss me, Kade.”
He shouldn’t. All rationale for why this would be a bad idea went up in smoke the minute his hungry lips touched hers. He pressed his mouth to hers, gently at first, afraid he’d hurt her. But then her hands came up to his chest, and she grabbed fistfuls of his shirt, pulling him closer to her soft, curvy body.
His muscles strung so taut he thought they might snap from contact. Breathing in her clean, flowery scent caused his body to ache for her. When she deepened the kiss, teasing his tongue inside her mouth, Kade’s self-control detonated. He pulled her to him, remembering how sweet her creamy skin felt under his rough hands. How much he wanted to drive himself deep inside her and forget the world around him. How much he wanted to go back in time and act differently after the weekend they’d shared. He’d tell her he could change if it meant hearing her voice next to him when he went to sleep at night.
It might be a lie, but it felt so true, so real when he got lost in that sweet kiss and her flower bouquet scent. He brought his hands up to her face to position her mouth for better access. How many times had he thought about doing this very thing in the past few months? Too many?
A lightning bolt of guilt slammed into him for what was happening between them, for what he was helpless to fight. This tide, this current was too damn strong.
Guilt fought and won.
Kade took a step back. He could think more clearly when he wasn’t breathing in the woman he loved.
Loved?
Shit. He needed to erase that word from his vocabulary when it came to Bree. Her heart still belonged to Zeke, and Kade was being the worst possible friend right now. Selfish.
“Not a good idea,” he said, forcing his gaze away from the hurt and confusion in Bree’s eyes. “I just can’t.”