Chapter 37 #2
“I wanted to,” I admitted, lacing my arms around his neck.
“There were some times I wanted to so badly. But I managed to convince myself that if it was what I thought, if we were mates, you would have acted on it. And so I was just a duty to you, just another one of your responsibilities.” I laughed lightly.
“I guess we were both waiting for the other.”
“To my eternal shame.” His lips met mine.
I pressed myself against him, craving more of him, craving all of him.
This feeling was insanity. I couldn’t get enough.
And he seemed to feel exactly the same, as he deepened the kiss, his hands digging into my hips and holding me tightly, so tightly.
Eventually, we pulled apart, and he tucked me back into his side as we continued our walk up the mountain.
Talk turned to other, lighter things. Every so often, one of us would pull the other into an alley or courtyard and steal kisses. We were laughing as we approached the end of the path, the large gates open ahead of us. I still hadn’t brought up the one thing we needed to talk about.
I paused, my hand tightening on his arm, the weight of what we were returning to pressing down on me. “We can’t tell anyone,” I said slowly, hating the words coming out of my mouth.
He went completely still beside me. Through the bond, I felt his shock turn to something darker. Hurt. Anger. Shame.
“No, no. Griff, look at me.” I hastened to explain, my hands cradling his scratchy face.
“I’m not ashamed of this. I want to shout it from every tower in Valdris.
I want everyone to know you’re mine.” I kissed him fiercely, pouring every ounce of truth into both the kiss and our bond until I felt some of his tension ease.
“Then why?” His voice was rough.
“Because… Finn.” My voice broke on the name. “I can’t bear to see his face when he realizes what this is. I care about him too much to hurt him like that without warning. We need time to figure out how to tell him gently.”
Griff closed his eyes, exhaling heavily. Through the bond, I could tell his brotherly instincts were warring with his possessive need to claim me publicly. “I hate this,” he ground out finally.
“I hate it too.”
He backed me against the stone wall beside the gates, tucking my body tightly against his. “Understand this—even if we delay telling the world, I will be in your bed every night, claiming you so thoroughly that no one could ever question you’re mine.”
The ardor in his voice sent heat spiraling through me. “Is that a promise?”
“Yes.”
As soon as we entered the castle walls, Andrei appeared, some sort of instinct informing him when his wayward patient appeared.
Probably his soul channel. We managed to avoid everyone as he steered us toward his office.
Ushering me in, he blocked Griff’s entrance. “You can come in once I examine her.”
Griff’s mask had returned but I felt him bristle through the bond as Andrei shut the door in his face.
Andrei rested his fingertips against my head and my heart, eyes closed, reading whatever signs he had access to.
Shaking his head, he pulled his hands away.
“You’re in surprisingly good shape for someone who was buffeted through time, survived an ancient battle, lived through magical stasis, and…
” His eyes flicked meaningfully toward the door.
“Whatever recent activities have left you glowing like that.”
I blushed, but he ignored it and kept going. “I would tell you to stop overdoing it but I know it would fall on deaf ears.”
“I’m shocked you think I’d overdo it,” I replied innocently.
“Drink this.” He handed me a small glass of clear liquid.
I sniffed it suspiciously. It smelled overwhelming of peppermint. “What is it?”
“A contraceptive. You’ll need it until your channels develop enough for you to control your fertility naturally.” He paused, noting my flaming cheeks, eyebrows raised. “Unless I misread the situation?”
I felt myself turn an even brighter red.
“Drink up.”
“Hurry it up there, Princess.” Griff’s impatience blazed through the bond.
“Got somewhere urgent to be?”
The answer was not in words but in vivid imagery that made my knees weak—me perched on Andrei’s desk, Griff kneeling between my spread thighs, his mouth…
I choked on my next breath as I clamped my legs together.
Thank Erde I was already blushing.
“Stop that,” I flung down the bond as I drank the contents of the glass in one gulp, spluttering as it burned going down. I think it was supposed to be sipped.
Andrei’s eyes narrowed shrewdly. “What aren’t you telling me?”
Trying and failing to ignore the images Griff was sending—images that were now of my body moving under his—I shifted my weight from side to side. There was certainly too much to convey before Griff lost what was left of his patience and broke down the door.
“Don’t think I haven’t already contemplated it.”
Andrei was staring at me, probably wondering why I was taking so long to answer. Or maybe not. He was astute.
“I have Violet’s memories,” I answered him.
His hand was on my head before I could draw back. His eyes shot wide. “How did that happen?”
I shrugged. “She did it. I needed answers and we didn’t have time. So she gave me everything.”
“How are you not insane?” he breathed. I wasn’t sure if he’d meant to say it out loud.
I cracked a wry grin. “I imagine I have you and Freya to thank for that. I felt you both while I was in stasis. But it’s similar to flipping through a book now, instead of having two identities.”
I felt Griff pacing outside the door. “You have thirty more seconds, Princess, before I come in there and get you.”
“Aren’t you known kingdom wide for your patience and control?”
“Not when it comes to you.”
As if Andrei knew what was happening between us, he went to the door. Before he opened it, he gave me a long look and said sharply, “We’re not done discussing this.”
As soon as the door opened, Griff strode in, his eyes sweeping over me, checking for any change that had occurred in the last ten minutes while I was locked in a healer’s room before wrapping an arm around my waist.
“I take it you both accepted the bond?” Andrei stated mildly, taking in Griff’s protective stance.
I nodded as Griff simply tucked me tighter against him.
“When did you become such a possessive asshole?” I asked him.
“Less than ten minutes after I met you.”
Andrei cocked his head to one side, as though listening to something. “I’ll keep it secret until you two decide to share.”
“Thank you,” I whispered. Griff just stood stiffly at my side.
“You could be a little nicer to him. He’s just trying to help,” I told Griff.
“Princess, I’ve spent months holding myself back from touching you, from acting on these thoughts. I’m out of patience. And right now, I can’t get out of my head how good you taste. And how wet you currently are. So wrap up this conversation. Now.”
I thanked Andrei again, a bit abruptly, and walked out of his office, Griff following so close behind me, I could feel his breath on my neck, his hand, as usual, on my lower back.
“You know there’s a desk in our suite right?” I reminded him.
I felt a wave of desire crash through the bond again. “After you.”
But before we could take more than a few steps, I heard my name called out.
Shit.
“Shit,” he echoed, his hand dropping from my waist.
I closed my eyes. “My thoughts exactly.”
“Lexie, you’re up!” Freya bounded down the hallway, Finn close behind. “How are you feeling?”
Right. I was supposed to be recovering from magical exhaustion, not being thoroughly debauched by my secret mate.
I caught Finn’s concerned look and felt a stab of guilt. Freya’s eyes narrowed, her face settling into her healer expression as she looked between us, before a knowing gleam entered her eyes.
“I’m good, Freya.” My eyes met Griff’s, and the heat hidden there nearly undid me. “Really, really good.”
I quickly filled Finn and Freya in on everything that had happened—well, almost everything.
The omission sat heavy in my chest as I watched Finn’s face, waiting for some hint of awkwardness after our last encounter when he’d kissed me.
But he simply listened with the same focused intensity he always brought to these puzzles, as if that moment had never happened.
Perhaps it hadn’t mattered as much to him as I’d feared.
Beyond mild surprise at my tale of time travel and witnessing the battle of Valdris, he immediately zeroed in on what mattered most. “Violet’s memories?” he said, leaning forward with excitement in his eyes. “Maybe you did get all the answers, Lexie.”
It was time to find out. Which was how I found myself cross-legged on my bed twenty minutes later.
Griff sat beside me, close enough that his familiar warmth steadied my nerves.
His hand came to rest on my thigh, grounding me on the chance that I lost myself in Violet’s mind.
I opened all of my channels, feeling the familiar rush of power course through me.
Deep in my mind, I found the segmented area where Violet’s memories were kept, organized but overwhelming in scale.
Here we go.