Chapter 27
27
GUY ‘FOSTER’
The timing of this baby is truly terrible, as most babies’ grand entrances tend to be. Just as I was about to pour my heart out to Eve and tell her that I would do everything all over again, without any hesitation or regret, we were interrupted. It seems to be a recurring theme for us lately.
‘You don’t have to stay,’ Eve says as we follow a hospital guide through the maze-like hallways on our way to Labor and Delivery. Despite Eve telling the woman that she works here and knows her way around, the guide insisted on directing us. ‘You can drive my car home and I’ll have my mom bring me back,’ she says.
‘Don’t be ridiculous,’ I reply with a shake of my head. ‘You came here for me, now it’s my turn to return the favor.’
She gives me a slight smile. ‘Are you sure? My family aren’t exactly your biggest fans.’
I look down at her walking at my side, still wondering how she pulls off the cowgirl get-up so freaking well. ‘And why’s that?’
She shrugs, guilt written all over her face. ‘A girl’s got to confide in someone about her problems. Plus, let’s not forget that you missed every important event they planned to celebrate us after our last-minute nuptials.’
I frown, ashamed that I did indeed do that. I was so obsessed with my career that I figured the five-minute ceremony was enough for us to live happily ever after. Now I’m realizing it wasn’t. Was I even trying?
‘Well, considering the little I know about what Cayden did in front of them, I’d wager they hate him more than they hate me for not being around. So, I’ll take my chances,’ I reply, hoping that these people can eventually forgive me for hurting their daughter.
And I get that she was hurt. But I didn’t come out of this relationship unphased. No. I was a mess. Matty is taking things to the grave I was so torn up. Now, with Eve in my presence again, all I want to do is make it right.
The elderly guide leads us to a stop outside of room 411, Jess’s birthing suite. ‘Here we are,’ she says with a kind smile. ‘The family waiting room is just down the hall near the fire exit if you’d rather wait there.’
‘We’re good for now, thank you,’ I reply, pushing open the heavy door for Eve to enter. I follow closely behind her.
The Labor and Delivery suite greets us with an air of sterility – white walls, floors, and furnishings. The air is thick with the smell of bleach, mixed with the faint aroma of disinfectant and the underlying musk of baby powder – the scent of a new life. I hear the steady beeping of a monitor, but it’s slightly muffled by the chatter of Eve’s parents, sister, and Kait, who’s decked out in a pair of light blue scrubs.
‘Hi, you guys!’ Eve greets everyone enthusiastically, walking straight to Jess and gently patting her swollen belly. ‘He’s on his way, huh?’
The room falls eerily silent as everyone turns to look when they spot me.
‘Foster.’ Kait’s eyes widen as she acknowledges my presence. Her gaze flickers over to Eve, then back to me as she mutters under her breath, ‘You brought him?’
‘I’m right here,’ I remind her with a smile.
‘Yes, you are,’ she says, crossing her arms over her chest.
Eve could be right. These people may hate my guts.
Luckily, Kait’s gaze moves over to Eve, and half a smirk creeps up on her. ‘Where were you guys? At a rodeo?’
‘In my condition?’ I ask with a laugh, shaking my head. ‘No, your sister brought me to a country bar,’ I say, tipping my hat playfully.
‘We went with Gen,’ Eve explains. ‘You know that guy she pretends she’s not into, Brady? He works there. And I figured Foster was getting stir-crazy in my apartment and he missed the fun we used to have together, so I brought him with.’ She suddenly turns to me, still a bit glassy-eyed. ‘Shoot! I never got to prove to you that I can ride that bull!’
I chuckle. Clearly, she’s still a little tipsy. ‘There will be other chances for bull-riding,’ I say, patting her back.
Eve’s mother, who has been watching our exchange with mild confusion, finally speaks up. ‘You two are back together?’
Eve shoots a panicked look at her sister. ‘You didn’t tell her?’
‘Why would I? He’s not my problem.’ Her words hang heavy in the air, revealing the underlying tension amongst us all.
‘Did, uh—did she do this to you?’ her father asks, his eyes crinkling in a hint of a proud smile as he takes in the sight of my bruised and bandaged body.
I shake my head, wincing at the pain that’s now breaking through, considering I’ve dialed back on the morphine and didn’t take any at all this evening, just to make sure we made it to and from the bar.
‘Motorcycle stunt gone wrong.’
‘You know Foster,’ Eve says with a fond smirk. ‘He’s a true adrenaline junkie, always pushing the limits of gravity.’
‘Not just gravity,’ Jess adds in a low murmur.
‘She wasn’t enough for you to show up before, but you came to her while you’re hurt?’ Jean – Eve’s mom – asks.
She’s never really been a beat-around-the-bush sort of woman. If she has a question, she’s asking it. The first thing she asked me when we met was how much money dirt biking could possibly make. So I pulled up my bank account and showed it to her. If that was her only worry, I had it covered.
‘Mom,’ Eve interjects, shaking her head in exasperation. ‘It wasn’t like that. I volunteered to help.’ The air around us seems tense as we wait for her mom’s response, the only sound coming from the fetal monitor. The baby’s heart thumps steadily, a soothing rhythm amid chaos. But mine feels like it’s galloping through my chest, desperately trying to escape. That family waiting room has never sounded better.
Jess groans loudly, grasping tightly onto the bed railings as she writhes in pain. ‘What’s with this breakthrough pain?’ she cries out, her eyes pleading with Kait for relief. ‘Can’t you up the meds? Is there a friend and family extra dosage that you forgot?’
‘This isn’t an oil change,’ Kait says, shaking her head. ‘Now, I’m not usually this honest with patients, but because you’re my best friend I feel the need to warn you – you’re not having a baby and feeling nothing, even with medication,’ Kait says, looking at the printout scrolling from the monitor. ‘Contractions are getting closer, though. I should probably prep the room.’
‘I’m here! I’m here!’ Suddenly, a tall blond man bursts through the doorway, his movements frantic like he’s been running. In one hand, he holds a vibrant bouquet, and over his shoulder is a bag packed to the brim. ‘I can’t believe we forgot the bags!’ he exclaims, setting them down on a nearby chair before turning toward the room and spotting me – a stranger. He furrows his brow in confusion, before blurting out, ‘Who are you?’
The attention of the entire group shifts toward me again.
‘Scott,’ Eve says, stepping closer and sliding her hand around my bicep. ‘Meet Foster, an old friend of mine. Foster, this is Jess’s baby’s daddy, Scott.’
Jess lets out an exasperated sigh and interjects. ‘Old friend my ass. Foster’s her ex -husband, the one I told you about.’
A flicker of discomfort crosses Eve’s face but she quickly regains composure, forcing a tight smile onto her lips.
‘This is the FMX star?’ Scott asks, pointing at me.
My reputation precedes me, probably in more ways than just the one, too.
The whole room nods.
Scott turns to face me, his hand extended in greeting. ‘Well, howdy, partner.’ His eyes shift to my head, then to Eve, confusion filling his face.
‘We were at Achy Breaky Heart when we got the call,’ Eve informs him, flouncing her skirt with her fingertips as she explains our ‘looks’.
‘I’ve heard so much about you,’ he remarks, causing Eve’s jaw to visibly clench.
‘All good, I’m sure,’ I tease playfully, glancing at a glaring Jess while earning a hearty laugh from Scott.
Eve grins, relief painted across her face. Maybe they don’t all hate me? All this guy knows is that I showed up during an important event in Eve’s life – the birth of her nephew.
A low, guttural moan escapes Jess’s lips and she immediately clutches Scott’s hand, pressing it tightly against her chest. The pain etched on her face is evident as she lets out another cry of agony.
‘That anesthesiologist said he could hit me in the leg with a hammer and I wouldn’t care. Lies!’ she exclaims loudly, frustration and discomfort clear in her voice. ‘Get. Him. In. Here!’
‘Relax, Jessie,’ her husband says. ‘And maybe loosen the grip on my h—aahhaaha,’ he squeals, obviously getting the opposite of his request.
Feeling helpless, and a tad unwelcome, I turn to Eve and say, ‘I think that’s my cue. I’ll be waiting for you down the hall.’ As I leave the room, the sound of Jess’s cries echoes through the corridor – the sound of birth control.
The waiting room of the hospital is decently sized. A couple of tables and chairs sit mid-room. The overhead lights are off and only small table lamps emit a warm glow in each corner. The walls are painted a crisp white, and on one side, a large window overlooks the city lights below and the Willamette River. You’d pay a million dollars for a home with this view. Along the walls, there are comfortable couches arranged for seating, as well as a flat-screen television playing sports highlights on mute. The only other occupant is a slight man, his eyes transfixed on the TV screen. It’s hard to tell if he’s actually waiting for someone or just catching up on the sports stats.
There’s a faint smell of disinfectant lingering in the air, a reminder of the seriousness of the place. Posters promoting pregnancy and infant care line the walls instead of artwork. In one corner, multiple vending machines stand ready to provide sustenance and a Keurig promises a cup of hot coffee to those in need. I choose a spot on one of the couches and sink into its cushioned embrace, removing my cowboy hat and placing it gently over my face – like they do in the movies – then close my eyes and allow myself to rest.
After weeks of being confined to a bed for most of the day, I suddenly feel like I’ve just run a marathon. Everything hurts and I could sleep until tomorrow night, if I wanted. Instead, as I lie here, my mind races with thoughts of all the things I should have done differently. I should have brought her on tour with me, but the guys were against it because we’d only known each other thirty days – why should they have to change their lives while we lived together because I couldn’t wait? They were scared it’d change the vibe of our group, and that creates a bit of havoc when you’re doing daredevil things in front of a crowd. And how the fuck have I not considered having to make amends with her family if I ever tried to fix this mess? God, I wish things could be as easy as they were at first. I’d give anything to get that back.
Five Years Ago
As I pull into my driveway, she’s standing on the porch, waving like a psychopath. A beautiful, fun-loving psychopath. I laugh, waving back as I park my car.
‘Hi, handsome husband!’ she exclaims, waving her left hand, now sporting a sparkling diamond as perfect as she is. She refused to let me pick the size because she didn’t want to ‘stand out’ – that’s not her, so she ‘settled’ for a .75 carat emerald-cut diamond, flanked by two smaller triangular-cut sky blue topazes that she claims remind her of my eyes. Sweet as sugar – that’s my girl.
‘Hello, beautiful wife,’ I say, planting a kiss on her as I wrap my arms around her, carrying her up the porch and through the front door. Our usual, very ‘casual’ greeting anytime I arrive home, whether I’ve been gone ten minutes or ten days.
‘I missed you!’ she says, running a hand down my chest.
‘Missed you too,’ I reply, grinning as I set her down in the cozy living room. The scent of her favorite vanilla candle fills the space, mixing with the aroma of…
‘Do I smell Chinese food?’
‘Yes!’ she says. ‘I slaved in that hot kitchen all day for you.’
I laugh, patting her ass as we walk into the kitchen. ‘I’ll pay you back for that lie later…’
We sit at the island across from each other, because she wants to see my handsome face when she talks to me. Her words.
‘Nobody on the road is this pretty,’ I say, looking at her between each potsticker I eat.
She chuckles. ‘Are you declaring me the prettiest girl on the planet?’
‘I am.’ I hop off the bar-stool and grab the trophy I just won from my bag and set it between us. ‘I’ll have my name and title buffed out. Tomorrow this will say, “Prettiest Girl on Earth – Eve Foster”.’
She lets out a soft giggle – it’s adorable – one of the many things I love about this girl. I really mean it too. I’m feeling things I’ve never felt before when I’m around her. Sometimes I can’t even believe she fell for me. I’m usually covered in grease, reek of gasoline and exhaust, and trek dirt into the laundry with my clothing – and she sees right through it.
As we eat, we fall into our usual easy rhythm of conversation, sharing stories of our day with laughter and affectionate teasing. Sure, it’s only been two weeks since we got married, but it’s only going to get better. God damn. How lucky am I to have found a woman who can make even the mundane moments feel like magic?
Now
‘Here we are.’ Kait’s voice cuts through my thoughts and pulls me out of a deep nap that felt like hours had passed. To my surprise, I see her helping a frail and weak-looking Eve over to the couch where I am sitting.
‘What happened?’ I ask, concerned.
‘Birth is not a beautiful process,’ Eve says with a small smile as she sits next to me on the couch, leaning her head against my shoulder.
‘She fainted,’ Kait explains, a slight grin on her face. ‘It’s interesting how she can handle trauma situations but gets overwhelmed by childbirth.’
‘I’m not usually looking up my sister’s hoo-ha,’ she snaps. ‘I’m complicated,’ she continues with a sigh, closing her eyes as if to block out the memories of what she’s just experienced. ‘And the two moonshine drinks are not helping.’
Kait’s nose wrinkles in disapproval. ‘Moonshine? Is that what I smell on your breath?’ She shoots a glance at me – as if the moonshine was my idea – before returning her gaze to Eve, who is now slumped against my side.
‘Maybe grab her something to eat and drink,’ Kait suggests, motioning toward the vending machines. ‘It’ll help with her blood sugar.’
Eve shakes her head stubbornly, burying her face deeper into my one good shoulder. ‘No,’ she mumbles, voice muffled. ‘I can’t eat after that.’
A smile tugs at the corner of my lips as I wrap my arm around Eve protectively. ‘Don’t worry, I’ll take care of her,’ I assure Kait as she slowly backs out of the waiting room, concern on her face but finally leaving us in peaceful silence.
I feel Eve’s tension beside me as she leans into me, seeking solace from the ordeal she just went through. An image I don’t want to tempt even a little bit. As I trace my fingertips gently up and down the back of her arm, I feel her muscles slowly relax under my touch. Her forehead is pressed into my neck, and it sends a shiver down my spine. It’s been so long since I’ve held her like this, and I can’t help but wonder how I ever let her go. Damn that Famous 15 side of me. The cocky – ‘I have to win’ – Guy who put that ahead of a life with her and she didn’t want to wait – to put it shortly. We’re in this situation because of me.
The glow of the table lamps casts a warm light on her delicate features, accentuating the curve of her cheekbones and the flutter of her lashes. How did I ever fuck things up with this incredible woman?
‘Kait insisted I look to see my nephew crowning,’ she says with a shudder. Just mentioning it causes her body to tremble against mine. ‘Be glad you left when you did and didn’t have to witness that. I’d rather be back at the playground in a less than safe neighborhood.’
‘Me too, if I’m being honest,’ I reply, my voice low as I inhale deeply, taking in her familiar scent. ‘At least then we could finish a conversation.’
The room is so quiet you can hear the seconds tick by on the wall clock.
‘What would you do if you could go back?’ she asks, her tone hesitant. ‘That’s what you were about to tell me when my mom called.’
A sharp pang of regret pierces my heart as I recall the words I probably shouldn’t have said, now realizing their potential to change our relationship in ways I can’t predict. Will it be for better or for worse? Looks like we’re about to find out.
‘I would marry you again, properly this time, without hesitation,’ I declare, my voice steady because I do not doubt this. I still want it.
Silence hangs in the air for a moment before she responds, her voice barely above a whisper, ‘You would?’
‘In a heartbeat,’ I say, meaning it so much I hope she hears it. ‘Evie, you’re the only girl I’ve ever truly loved.’
She gazes up at me with tear-filled eyes, still nestled against my shoulder. ‘Even now, after I broke up with you via a handwritten note?’
I nod emphatically. I’d forgotten she gets emotional when she drinks. ‘Did that note break me?’ I pause, allowing the heaving sigh to say it for me. ‘Yes. But till death do us part, girl. Every word I spoke that day – hell, every word I ever said – was true. I was absolutely besotted with you, Jellybean.’
Her lips are parted as she listens, now sitting on her knees and facing me, her eyes focused on me intently as if I’m telling her a bedtime story.
‘But I understand if you can’t forgive me,’ I say softly, my voice laced with genuine remorse. ‘A good husband puts his wife and their relationship above all else. I didn’t even try to do that. Instead, I was caught up in a career I was already dominating. In hindsight, I should have taken the time off to start our life together right. I can’t change the past. But I am in control of my present.’
Eve’s eyes shimmer with unshed tears as she searches my face, as though looking for any hint of insincerity. She places her hand on my cheek like she would when I was in the hospital, her fingers warm against my skin – just like then, instant tingles under my skin.
‘I wish you’d have figured this out sooner,’ she whispers. ‘Maybe things would have been different?’
It’s as if the entire world has narrowed down to just the two of us on that couch because she is all I see. I reach for her hand, entwining our fingers gently, giving her time to process everything that’s been said.
‘Things could be so different this time around,’ I reassure her. ‘Trust me, I’ve been obsessing over it since you left.’
‘But you never even texted me.’
Shameful. Jesus, Foster.
‘I know. We’ve discovered my fatal flaw. I shut down when things don’t go my way, and I’ve worked on that.’
Her jaw drops, but she snaps it shut quickly.
‘Also, I did just sort of lay this on you so don’t think I expect you to respond to any of this tonight. We’ve got time to talk.’
Her eyes meet mine, filled with a mixture of emotions – uncertainty, longing, and a flicker of something that resembles hope. Or maybe I’m just wanting to see that last part. Please, let it be hope.
‘I just need to think about things,’ she says. ‘My heart is beyond confused and the moonshine is making me cloudy.’
‘Cloudy’. How is she this cute? With that I lift her hand, feeling the softness of her skin against my lips as I press them gently to her knuckles. All those dreams of our past I’ve been having lately come at me all at once and there isn’t anything I want more than to get that back.
‘I’m not going anywhere, Jellybean,’ I whisper, hoping to convey all the love and reassurance that words can’t express. And there it is. I know, without a doubt, that I am completely in love with this woman – since the moment we met and not a second less.
A gentle rap on the wooden doorframe of the waiting room draws our attention. Kait’s face lights up with a soft smile. ‘Your nephew’s here,’ she says, almost whispering in excitement. ‘Would you like to meet him?’