Chapter 44
“Love, you don’t have to dress up if you don’t want to,” I whisper into his hair as he bites his lip, staring at the closet with growing panic.
“This is the first family dinner in a long time. I want to look presentable.” Stepping even closer until our skin touches, since neither of us has gotten dressed yet, I hold him tight, trying to soothe his worry with my steadiness.
With a huff, he turns his head and lightly kisses me before saying, “I’m being ridiculous, aren’t I? ”
Being a wise man, I don’t agree. “No, you’re worried, and that’s natural. But…while this is the first family dinner, that’s exactly what it is: family. Not the Martellis. Not the Amatos. Our family, the one the Council has brought together.”
A smile finally breaks loose, and I almost sigh in relief. I was almost at my breaking point between dealing with his stress and missing Marcus.
Speaking of Marcus, I almost drop to the floor in relief when he enters our bedroom.
His eyes appear tired, and grief ravages his face, even though he tries to grin through it.
I turn our Love to face him, so I can open my arms wider, showing my Tease there’s enough room for him too.
My heart carries space for them both, and from the brief flash of gratefulness on his face, my Tease must have needed that reassurance.
“Oomph.” Carter laughs as he embraces Marcus with me, both of us barely staying on our feet from the force of my unruly submissive’s exuberant greeting.
“Have you come to get dressed?” I ask as I firmly steer Carter back to his task, slapping his ass for good measure just to see him jump. The giggle he gives me is worth it.
Marcus’s tired grin holds some of his old cockiness, and it’s enough for now. I tuck it inside my heart, a reminder of what we fight for every day. “I suppose getting dressed is the better option if we actually need to show up…”
“Alright, troublemaker, no joining forces against me. If you both behave, I may let you have a special treat tonight.”
Marcus’s grin disappears as he steps away from us, his arms wrapping around himself. “Javi wants me back…there…after dinner.”
My heart thumps hard as I mentally curse myself. Fucking hell. Of course. Before I can do anything, Carter swoops in, opening his arms as he steps toward Marcus, who stiffly allows himself to be held.
Clearing my throat, I join them. With a rough voice, I say, “Tease, it doesn’t matter where you are. Whether you’re in the medical wing or in this bed, your place is always in our hearts. And we’ll be here for you every step of the way. I promise.”
A sob catches in his throat, but he pushes it down, refusing to give in to the tears as he leaves our embrace. He forces a tight smile, and it breaks my heart, but I let it go…for now. Carter and I will be there for him—we’ll all be there for each other, because that’s who we are now.
“Alright, let’s get dressed and go enjoy the family dinner. Did Cole already eat?” Marcus frowns at the clock, as the family dinner is set for far later than Cole’s usual dinner time.
“Yes. In fact, he just went down for the night.”
Marcus nods, but doesn’t say anything, wariness rolling off him.
With a heavy sigh, I reach out, touching Marcus’s arm in silent encouragement, wishing there was more I could do.
Fucking demons. I’m impatient for Brannigan to get here, because while the medications seem to be helping Marcus, they’re not going to be enough in this battle.
And what I wouldn’t give to fight it for him…
We all dress quickly, and I lead them out of the suite so we can join the others in the dining room.
It’s a fully packed table. Hell, I’m actually surprised they found a table that will fit everyone, as the one in the Martelli mansion never would have.
I’m relieved that it’s round, because I can’t even begin to wrap my head around who would be sitting at the head of the table.
Guiding my loves to the only three empty spaces left, I position Carter between Marcus and myself.
Yes, I’m making a damn point; I’m not blind to the looks Cristian sends his way.
And neither is Carter, who is becoming increasingly upset by them.
He is taking all the guilt onto himself, instead of understanding that Cristian needs to deal with his own bullshit, not put it on his ex.
I’m situated next to Jude, who has the twins sandwiched between him and his Boy. His Shining Stars. They’ve certainly blossomed under Jude and Antonio’s care.
Next to Antonio is Ignacio, who thankfully looks better, but his movements are still somewhat choppy. It doesn’t escape my notice that he’s carefully avoiding looking at Cristian. There seems to be a lot of that going on.
Roman, unsurprisingly, is next to Ignacio. His tactile love is on full display, as he leans into Ignacio, who relaxes incrementally each time he does it. However, from the brief glances I give Benjamin, he appears less than pleased. His fucking jealousy is going to get him stabbed.
Next to Roman is Leandro, with Boston nearby. Tennant is beside his son, likely to keep him alive. Possibly in line…
And then there's the troublemaker—Benjamin. He’s sitting between his lover, Tennant, and from the vibes I’m picking up, his possible jailer, Hollis, who does not look thrilled anytime he has to interact with Benjamin. Strengthening my point that Benjamin could possibly get stabbed.
Thankfully, Lio is next to Hollis. He’s at least looking better. I note that the bandages on his wrists are smaller, even though he hides his hands under the table as much as possible.
That nightmare of almost losing him may never leave me. It’s why I’m grateful Marcus went in voluntarily.
It takes me a moment to locate Midas, but I find him lying down slightly away from the table. The proper distance not to encroach, but close enough to watch his person. Between the training he underwent as a puppy, and with Leandro, he’s become quite the security asset.
Lio is sandwiched between Hollis and his Master.
I’m not sure how Hollis can stand it, although I understand that Sandro has changed.
I’ve seen it myself with Cole. Between that and the way Sandro has always loved that Boy…
Well, hopefully, Hollis and Sandro find a place of peace.
Still, I’m cautious. Hope wars with worry, the complex feeling of needing to protect him, even though Lio can defend himself if he chooses.
My hands clench into fists at the sight of Cristian at the dinner table, leaning toward Sandro.
I want to hate him, and normally, I do. But the way he’s been wandering aimlessly around the mansion pricks at my conscience, calling to the Dom in me to solve the problem.
Javi better get on top of it soon. If he doesn’t, I’ll have to get involved, which could end…
messily. I probably shouldn’t kill one of my new son’s fathers. Maybe.
Thankfully, Soren is right beside Cristian.
I can trust the Daddy Dom to keep him in line.
I briefly wonder how Cristian would react to a Daddy, and the thought relaxes me because I’d find it hilarious.
Although, I do wonder if it would help him.
Someone to give him instruction, and take away the power he’s always felt the need to buckle under.
Soren’s Boy is right next to him. Doc’s face shows his absolute lack of enthusiasm for being here, even as Sarah, sitting to his right and therefore my left, whispers something in his ear. Whatever it is lightens his mood for a brief moment before his normal surly attitude kicks in.
Fuck. I have major respect for Soren, because there's no way in hell I would want that. I’ll keep my Love and Tease. Although, knowing I’ll lose Sarah soon…that hurts. As if she can sense my darkening thoughts, she nudges me.
“Stop glaring at people,” she whispers to me. “You’re not nearly as scary as you think, and you will not be successful.”
Doc snorts, overhearing her. I wish I could say she’s wrong, but the truth is, my glare does not compare to hers. Although, she’s had years of dealing with Sandro, back when he was Il Padrone. She had reason to hone that attitude.
Thankfully, we’re given a break in the atmosphere when the staff start bringing out the food.
Unlike past dinners, the meals aren’t served plated.
Instead, they’re slid onto the dining room table, family style.
I can see the Council’s point about trying to set ourselves apart from the past, but once the kitchen staff leave, nobody makes a move to serve themselves.
That thick tension starts to invade the room again, but nobody moves, despite the delectable looking feast. Carter reaches for me, grabbing my hand in a tight grip.
I know he’s wondering if, as one of the leaders, he should speak up, but it’s awkward for him with Cristian here.
Neither Roman nor Lio seem up to it either.
Jude’s signing something to Roman, who is firmly ignoring it.
Just when I’m about to give in, a break comes from the person I least expected.
Sandro clears his throat and draws all eyes to him.
Cristian’s hand finds his, as if he's providing comfort. Sandro’s eyes soften as he glances over at him, and I wonder if we shouldn’t have insisted they put space between themselves.
Trusting those two together…it’s not high on my list.
“I just want to say how incredibly proud I am of this family and of the Council for everything you do. And to thank you for the invitation to dinner. It all looks wonderful, and I know the staff have worked hard to develop the menu with Roman’s guidance.”
It’s short, but enough. It breaks us from the formality, the stiffness of waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Really, it’s the transition we all needed.
The acknowledgement that we’re all in different places compared to where we were months ago.
That Il Padrone is gone, and that Cristian is no longer at the helm either.
Sandro may be taking his first shaky steps toward finding his place, but Tennant’s nod has him straightening.
A flash of what looks like pride transforms him, for a moment, into the man I used to know, before it slips away and uncertainty lingers.
It’s going to be a long process, and hell, I’m not even sure the empire of therapists will be enough, but at least this dinner is a start.
We all pile our plates with food, but nothing work-related is discussed.
Whether by design or not, we spend the night reconnecting as family, as friends, and, in certain cases, in grudging acceptance that the other person is alive.
Fuck if I’m not exhausted by the end of it.
Although, I have to admit that Javi was correct about these meals needing to restart.
The sense of normalcy was nice, even if it felt partially like a facade with everything else still pressing against us.
Though, I still don’t trust it enough to bring Cole.
When I gather Marcus and Carter, we walk slowly toward the medical wing, so that Marcus can check back in.
From the way he’s drooping, it's clear he’s spent too.
Worry pricks at me, and the undercurrent of pain in Marcus’s lines is so fresh that I’m not sure how to handle it.
For a Dom, it’s the shittiest feeling in the world.
He stops us before we can enter the medical wing.
His pleading eyes meet mine, and I give him a hard kiss before stepping back.
I hate that he’s convinced he needs to do this by himself, that he’s putting distance between us, but I won’t fight him on it.
I can only hope that when he starts therapy, Brannigan will help him to see that we can be there for him.
He doesn’t need to carry this by himself.
“Oh,” he says, in a forced, nonchalant way. “By the way, the child psychologist should be here tomorrow. Uh, Javi said that since I’m doing well on my meds, I could be there?”
I blink, not expecting that. Mainly because Javi, once again, didn’t bother to tell us ahead of time. He seems to like springing things on Jude and me. Fucking hell. But when my brain finally puts everything together, I smile in relief.
“Of course. All of Cole’s dads will be there.
” I grab Carter’s hand before bringing Marcus in for a hug, which Carter joins in on.
The exhaustion that was seeping into me finally settles slightly, because this is what I live for.
The three of us. Together. Dealing with life’s problems, leaning on each other, and being there for one another.
Marcus kisses both Carter and me before he turns and walks away, leaving us staring after him. We may be separated momentarily, but this was a solid reminder of what we’re fighting for.
Our family. The three of us together with our sons. And the children still to come, because I know we all want more kids in our lives. As always, we fight for the Council that truly has revolutionized everything.