Chapter 50
Daniela
“How’s it going, J?” I tease my brother, pulling him into a hug.
He hugs me back, laughing, and for a moment it feels like we’re young again. Like no time has passed, and all the bad shit from the last few years is temporarily forgotten.
But as he sits down, I take in the way his face has aged, how skinny he still is despite being here in recovery for a month, and all of the bad comes trickling in again.
“Missed you,” he says with a melancholy smile.
“Missed you too.”
As the older sister, I’ve always felt the need to protect him from the world. Especially after our dad left, plunging Jason into a depression I’m not sure he ever really climbed out of. Sometimes, I feel like I failed. Like he slipped through my fingers, and I couldn’t do anything to stop it.
But the more rational side of me knows that’s not true. Adults make their own choices. You can give them all the help and support in the world, but at the end of the day, they’re still going to do what they’re going to do. You can’t lock them up in a tower and shake it out of them.
That’s also what makes this extra gratifying, though. He chose to come here. He wanted it for himself.
“So,” I begin, “I met someone pretty great.”
His mouth drops, and there’s a spark in his eye.
“I know. Shocking, right? I always said I would never settle down. Then possibly the most selfless doofus ever had to come stomping into my life, ruining all my solid plans. So rude of him.”
I shake my head in mock dismay. My brother smiles.
“I’m happy for you, D. You deserve it. More than anyone.”
“Thank you.”
He lowers his head. “Thank you for always taking care of me. I know you’ll deny it, but I know you were always watching me with one eye open. You’ve always been so protective of me.” His voice gets quiet. “I’m sorry I let you down. ”
“Hey,” I say firmly. “Don’t say that. You’re doing great now, and I’m so proud of you. Keep it up, okay? I don’t want to have to drive down to Southern California again to kick your ass.”
He nods, somber. “Okay.”
We visit for a little while longer, until my time is up. Apparently, he’s in a very strict place. They’re not allotted a lot of visiting hours.
When I return to the truck, Dex wraps me in a warm hug and opens my door.
“How was it?” he asks as I settle back in the passenger seat.
“Great,” I say honestly. “It almost seems like…he’s my brother again.”
“I’m glad.” Dex smiles. “Ready to head home?”
“Which home?” I ask.
“Good point,” he replies, his expression faltering slightly. But he doesn’t comment further on it.
It does feel like we’re in limbo a little bit, bouncing back and forth between Sacramento and Tahoe City. Eventually, we’ll have to figure something else out.