2
I head to my cabin first, put away my truck keys, then start toward the admin building. On the way, I see Sister Madysen.
“Brother King!” she calls excitedly, moving in for a hug.
“Sister Madysen. How are you?” I ask.
“Awesome. It’s so good to have you back. Everybody’s missed you,” she replies with that bright smile of hers, her skin looking a little darker.
“It’s good to be back,” I tell her.
We catch up with some small talk, things they did here at the youth camp, activities, and how Cole has been asking for me for the most part. After I thank her again for the food she dropped off and for checking in on me, I make my way to the cafeteria area.
The place is busy. Kids are talking, counselors are moving around, church members are everywhere, all of it loud and full of energy.
As I walk deeper under the large cafeteria port, my heart once again kicks into gear.
It’s that familiar feeling I thought would leave after I took a break, but it’s still here, clearly, because as soon as my eyes land on Erica, my heart begins pumping more blood throughout my body at a pace that feels like I can’t keep up with.
Erica is with Zosha behind the bakery area. Oh yeah, apparently Zosha is back.
I feel nervous. Why am I nervous? But I have to say good morning to them.
Walking up closer to the bakery, I see both Zosha and Erica are deep in conversation. The closer I get to the two women, the more nervous I feel, the more my legs seem to feel unsteady.
I stand there. Erica looks at me, then looks away. Zosha brightens up.
“Oh my gosh, King! It’s nice to see you.”
At least someone’s happy to see me.
“How was Poland?” I ask.
Zosha smiles wide. “I got to see my older sisters and my mom, it was absolutely amazing. We spent time in Kraków and Warsaw, walked around the old towns. The Christmas markets were beautiful. There were lights everywhere. I can tell it did a lot for Mom, being with family.”
“That’s nice,” I reply. “Sounds like a real blessing. We did something similar at church.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Mm. We pleaded the blood of Jesus over the year, and spoke life and blessings into it.”
“Oh I figured you guys would watch the ball drop,” she says.
“Eh, nah. Worshiping in the new year is way better than watching the ball drop. You should have been there.”
“It sounds magical,” she beams.
“It was. What do you got today?” I ask.
Zosha starts rattling off the pastries while pointing at them. “We’ve got cinnamon rolls fresh out, blueberry muffins, chocolate croissants, these lemon scones, and the apple turnovers are still warm. Oh, and the cheese danishes are going fast.”
This entire time, my eyes are partly on Erica too. She says absolutely nothing.
Is she not going to talk to me? Is she not even going to say good morning?
“Good morning, Sister Erica,” I say. My voice comes out a little too rough.
She only answers with a glare, but says absolutely nothing. Wow.
Zosha looks between the both of us, probably confused and feeling embarrassed on behalf of her friend.
I take my pastry, a roll that I know I’m not going to really eat much of, add that to my plate, and head for a nearby table.
Some other guys from my church are there, the ones who’ve been stationed up here at the youth camp for a while.
As I’m eating, since my back is to the bakery, I look over my shoulder and notice Erica filling up her little bag to put on that push scooter she usually uses, probably going to deliver to other areas on the youth camp.
I turn back around and keep eating along with the bacon I took. A sick feeling hits me, a hollowness in the pit of my stomach that makes me feel sad and lonely all of a sudden.
There are people around here, people I can talk to, people I know, but Erica being cold toward me feels like it’s taking the life out of me. And it shouldn’t, because I’m supposed to be staying away from her. Yes, it’s true.
I’ve been avoiding her. She texted pictures from the Christmas get-together of me with her and her family, asked if everything was okay, tried to reach me, and I’ve been ignoring her. Well… yeah, treating her the same way she’s treating me now.
I needed to get my spirit right. Surely she understands that.
If I told her what I was doing, it would raise more questions and start a fight I couldn’t stomach, especially after everything that happened at Christmas.
I didn’t set a very good example for her at all.
And she doesn’t respect my boundaries, so was I really that wrong?
Scripture says in 1 Corinthians 15:33, “Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners.” Or Proverbs 4:14-15: “Enter not into the path of the wicked, and go not in the way of evil men. Avoid it, pass not by it, turn from it, and pass away.” I did the right thing to protect my spirituality.
A little later, I’m fixing an AC unit at the back of the sports building. Down the path from there is the obstacle course, where a bunch of kids are being trained.
The survival guide is there.
Seo-Jun.
I head down to the obstacle course. Not because I necessarily have to, but… well, why not? And it’s not necessarily because Erica just happens to be there, standing next to Seo-Jun. I’m free right now, and I’m just curious.
It’s fun watching everyone train, almost like a competition. The kids get very competitive, and sometimes the counselors jump in.
There are a few counselors there, some twenty-somethings. One girl I’ve noticed looks a little older than the rest, maybe mid-twenties or early thirties.
It’s hard to tell because she wears these very thick-framed glasses and has messy brown hair that’s bone straight, looking like a mixture between white and Asian.
The only reason I noticed her is because she’s always staring at me whenever I’m around. At first, I thought she was one of the congregation members, but I think she was just hired as a counselor here.
As soon as she sees me, Seo-Jun calls out, “Who wants to have the next round?”
“Me! I-I w-will!” she says nervously happy, skipping forward. Seo-Jun smiles brightly and sets up the timer.
The girl goes up against two other counselors, one a short-haired red-haired woman and the other a curly-headed blonde guy whose age I don’t even know.
Seo-Jun blows his whistle, pacing slowly, watching everybody take off.
As soon as the girl with the glasses hits the monkey bars, she face-plants, slipping right off and landing in the dirt.
Her glasses and face get messy. The kids all laugh, with only a few asking if she’s okay.
Spitting out the mud, she gets up before anyone can help her and runs off away from the kids and the area.
Wow. That was very embarrassing.
Is someone going to go after her?
The blonde-haired guy with curly hair runs after her, thankfully.
I walk closer to the area, leaning on one of the wooden structures. The kids see me and all scream out my name.
I jump back a little in shock as what seems like about fifteen of them flock me, all talking at once so it’s hard to hear them. Looking over, I see Erica staring at me, Seo-Jun standing right next to her.
A little girl who looks about seven takes my wrist and starts pulling me closer into the area, a small clearing in the obstacle course where most of them are gathered.
“What was it like?” some ask.
“Is it true that you really fought a bear?” most of them ask.
“Was it scary?”
“How big was the bear?”
“Were you scared?”
All the questions come in at once. Erica just looks at me, then to the kids. Holding up my hands for them to quiet down, I point to one of them. It’s not their fault they’re curious.
A small kid wearing glasses asks, “Did you really fight a bear?”
I smile humbly. “Yeah, I… I guess I did,” I say.
“A black bear, which is much smaller than a grizzly,” Seo-Jun suddenly cuts in flatly to correct them.
I mean, a bear is still a bear, so why did he feel the need to add that in? Of course he wants to be competitive. What matters is that Erica and I are alive. But he’s right, it was a small bear.
“Yeah, but that black bear was really large,” a counselor cuts in.
“Yeah, but it was still a black bear, which are small. Most people have a chance in a fight like that,” Seo-Jun states.
Now normally I wouldn’t care. If someone tells me something I did wasn’t that miraculous or spectacular, I’d agree and tamp down my pride.
That’s something I’ve had to work on. I know a lot of people struggle with it, and I don’t need to look good in front of people.
Most of the time, honestly, I don’t want the attention on me.
But right now… I don’t know. Erica is looking at me, and I don’t want her to see me as weak.
I want to look strong for her. She was out there with me, so she knows, but I don’t like the survival guide’s energy.
He’s standing very close to her, and that smug look on his face tells me he doesn’t want Erica seeing me the way people see him.
“He’s right,” I start to say. The kids all quiet down. Seo-Jun smirks condescendingly at me. I know that look… because I’ve given it to people.
Walking in front of the crowd of kids and counselors, I stare down at the ground, then at them.
“The bear was much smaller than a grizzly bear, and I am so glad that it wasn’t a grizzly bear.
I’m glad we don’t have those around these parts.
The bear was big… and I was… incredibly humbled with how strong it was for its size.
I’m pretty sure that, had Seo-Jun been out there, weakened from days of exhaustion and near starvation and weakness, that he would have been a better match for the bear, but I did my best.”
“But… Erica was incredibly brave. She helped me.”
“Yeah, well, in moments like that you don’t have time for fear,” Seo-Jun says.
“That’s right. And I do admit that the only thing I was thinking about in that moment was protecting Erica because the bear was going after her,” I say. The kids all gasp.
Another kid asks, “Were you afraid?”
“Yes, I was,” I say honestly.
Seo-Jun scoffs.
“But that’s where faith in God comes in,” I add. “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind” (2 Timothy 1:7).
Seo-Jun rolls his eyes.
“Well,” Seo-Jun starts, “that’s why we have these classes, so that we don’t end up stranded unnecessarily long in the forest like King over here.
I’m glad that you and Erica made it back okay, but…
all of that could have been avoided if he had the skills to navigate and to survive and to avoid attacks.
Since my event, I have been out in many a wilderness, and I have never been attacked again.
Sure, I’ve encountered wildlife, but they know not to mess with me because I made sure to prepare myself.
And that’s something that God wants, right?
For people to be prepared. Because you never know…
when something will come up to take you. ”
“Like the rapture,” a little girl calls out.
“ Exactly, like the rapture. That tornado was like the rapture,” Seo-Jun says.
Erica stares at him, then her eyes flick to me. Seo-Jun completely takes back the kids’ focus. That’s fine.
I head back to my cabin.