Emery
When I walked into Grace and Lace three hours later, I was just as confused as I had been when I woke up in Noah’s arms this morning. So many feelings, so many emotions were rushing through me, and no matter how much time passed, every ache felt as poignant as ever.
Minus the fact that I actually slept in—that hadn’t happened since Carson passed away—I shouldn’t be this bothered by sleeping in the same bed as my fake future husband.
The memory of kissing him last night until I was breathless shouldn’t be burned into my brain.
If our relationship was fake, my feelings shouldn’t be real… so why did I feel this way?
For some asinine reason, my heart pounded every time Noah glanced over at me with his ridiculous half smile.
I was acutely aware of every time his arm brushed mine, causing my skin to tingle.
And somehow, my thumb always seemed to find the ring he’d slid onto my finger, and I found myself playing with it when I was lost in thought.
I knew that our relationship was fake, but my reaction to Noah seemed to tell a completely different story.
My feelings for Noah had grown and, if I wasn’t careful, I was going to violate our rules and fall for my fake husband.
Maybe I already had.
“Good morning, ladies,” the woman at the front desk greeted us. She removed the glasses that were perched on her nose and let them hang by the chain that wrapped around the back of her neck. “What can I do for you?” She’d moved around the desk and was now standing in front of it.
“My sister-in-law needs a dress,” Abigail said.
I was grateful to have her here with me.
My mind was racing a mile a minute, rendering me incapable of forming coherent sentences.
The timeline for this dress was super short, and I didn’t have time to get major alterations done, so I was going to have to get one from off the rack.
That was going to greatly limit my choices, so I was okay with Abigail taking point.
“Wonderful.” The woman’s attention was on me. “My name is Nancy, and I’d love to help you with that. When’s the wedding?”
“Saturday.”
Her eyes flew open as her lips made an “o” shape. “Oh my,” she whispered. “That’s soon.”
I gave her an apologetic smile. “Yes, I know. I’m so sorry.”
She shook her head. “No, no. It just doesn’t give us a lot of time.” She ran her gaze over me. “I think we might have some dresses that you can walk out with today.” She turned while waving her hand for us to follow. “Come on back.”
I couldn’t help but feel guilty that I was putting my tight timeline on this woman, but we were in here at Abigail’s insistence.
I tried to tell her at breakfast that I had plenty of dresses that would work, but Abigail just shook her head and told me that this was a special day—even if it was fake.
She’d even sent Noah, Bash, and Timothy off to find something to do until we were ready for them to come find a tux.
I was grateful for the distance from Noah.
It was easier to think without him standing just a few feet off.
My brain was so muddled and hazy because of that man, and I was ready for a break.
After Abigail and Nancy did their rounds in the store, I found myself sitting in the dressing room with wedding gowns hung up all around me.
Abigail kept asking me what style of dress I liked, but I couldn’t find it in me to decide.
I just told her that I would be happy with anything.
That all of this was just a ruse. Abigail sighed and shook her head before she whispered that I deserved to look nice regardless.
The thought of choosing a dress—of actually marrying Noah— was making it hard for me to breathe. Why did this have to be so complicated? Why did I go into his room last night? Why did I kiss him?
Then the memory of my conversation with Abigail before kiss-gate slammed into me.
My current state of confusion was her fault.
She’d told me that I needed to let go of my reservations. That I should knock on his door and kiss him. She was the reason I was in this mess to begin with.
“Yes, Nancy, I’ll let you know if we need any help,” Abigail said over her shoulder as she pushed open the door and joined me. Nancy said something back, but Abigail closed the door before I could catch it fully.
Now alone, Abigail sighed as she turned to face me. “That woman is nice, but she is nosy.” She clapped her hands together. “Now, let’s try some of these dresses on.”
“I’m mad at you.” The words blurted from my lips before I could stop myself. My cheeks turned red, and I pinched my lips together as I stared at Abigail’s startled expression.
“Because I insisted you try on a mermaid dress? You don’t have to—”
“No, not because of the dresses.” I waved my hand towards the gowns hanging up around the room.
“Because, you…well, you...” How could I say that I made out with Noah and fell asleep in the same bed as him without making it sound like the experience had affected me?
How can I be specific and aloof at the same time?
“Because I…?” She dragged out the words as if hoping that by the time she was done, I would have finished my sentence.
Throwing caution to the wind, I decided the best course of action was to just speak. “I did what you said. I went over to Noah’s room last night. I…kissed him, like you said I should do. And…”
Abigail’s eyebrows were up so high that they almost disappeared into her hairline.
She didn’t look upset or frustrated. She looked…
excited. And from the way she was working her lips, I could tell she was forcing herself to remain quiet until I finished.
Realizing that my anger might not be having the effect on her that I wanted, I clamped my mouth shut and glared at her.
“And?” her voice was higher as she looked expectantly at me.
“And…” I folded my arms across my chest. “And I shouldn’t have done that. It wasn’t the right move.”
Abigail’s expression fell as she tipped her head forward and gave me an “Are you serious?” look. She parted her lips before her gaze dropped down to my left hand, which was currently holding onto my right elbow, and her eyes widened.
“Is that a ring?” she asked as she closed the space between us at a speed that rivaled NASCAR.
She grabbed ahold of my finger and brought it up so she could study it.
“It’s a ring.” Her voice was low, almost like she was choking on the words.
Her gaze whipped up to me. She was expecting an explanation.
I didn’t know what to say, so I decided to go with the truth. It wasn’t like Abigail wouldn’t find out eventually. “Noah gave it to me this morning.”
Abigail made a noise that sounded like she was drowning. For the first time, she was speechless. I’d actually managed to render this woman incapable of speech.
“It does not mean what you think it means.”
Abigail blew out her breath, making her lips vibrate against each other. I waited for her to respond, but nothing came out. Instead, she dropped my hand, and it fell to my side. Now free, my thumb went up to the band, and I began spinning the ring around on my finger.
“I saw the ring in his wallet last night when I freaked out at the bar. He thought part of my freak-out was because of the size of the ring. I told him to give it to someone he cared about. Then this morning, I brought it back up, and he told me it was his grandmother’s and he wanted me to wear it.
” My eyes widened as the memory of him kneeling in front of me raced through my mind.
Even though my heart started pounding at the image, I decided it was probably best to leave that part out.
Abigail looked like she was moments away from collapse.
“And?” Abigail stepped closer to me, her eyes wide.
Too late. She could tell there was more.
“And…” How did I get out of this? I sighed. I didn’t. She already suspected too much. “And he got down on one knee and fake proposed.”
Abigail squealed. Loud and gleeful as she clapped her hands. “I’m so happy,” she whispered.
I frowned. “Did you miss the fake part?”
Abigail shook her head. “No.” Her happy expression didn’t change.
I narrowed my eyes. “I think you did, because you look like a proud parent at a kindergarten graduation.”
Her smile widened. “It’s because I am a proud parent. My kids are growing up.”
I brought my hand up to pinch the bridge of my nose.
“Abigail, this is all fake.” I pulled my hand away and held up the ring once more.
“He didn’t ask me to be his wife because he loves me.
He’s just…playing a part.” I scoffed. “He even said that if he didn’t propose the right way, his grandmother would haunt the two of us from the grave.
” I paused. “Meaning he contemplated the wrong way.”
“Mm-hmm.” It seemed like Abigail wanted to respond because that was what was socially expected, not because she actually believed me.
I sighed. I was frustrated that I’d told her everything, but I was even more frustrated that she wasn’t validating me.
I was determined to convince my heart that, to Noah, I was only ever going to be his fake wife.
Noah didn’t love me. I was a job for him, whether as my bodyguard or, now, as my fake husband.
That was all we were going to be because that was what he’d signed up for. That’s what we’d agreed to.
“Abigail.” My tone was soft. I needed her to understand what her reaction was doing to me. This wasn’t the time to confuse me. I was already so twisted up in my relationship with Noah that I couldn’t think straight. The last thing I needed was for her to give me hope.
Hope? Was that what I was feeling? Did I want my relationship with Noah to be real? Did I want our kiss to mean something? Did I want to wear his ring because I was the woman he wanted to give it to?
Was I…falling for him?