21. Emery
EMERY
I was tired and sore as I gripped onto the sides of the pool and hoisted myself out. Water dripped from my bathing suit as I walked over to the table, squeezing the ends of my hair as I went.
Timothy had abandoned the pool thirty minutes ago and was practically dry with his feet up on the deck chair and a towel wrapped around his waist. He was playing a game on my phone, completely oblivious to the world around him.
I yawned as I grabbed a nearby towel and wrapped it around my body. I ran my fingers through my hair before pulling the nearby chair closer to the table and sitting down. Abigail never went back in after eating pizza and Bash and Noah were finishing up their laps.
“Feel better?” Abigail asked as she set her phone down on the tabletop and turned to face me.
I nodded. “I needed that. It’s been a few days since I’ve worked out.” Planning a wedding in a week wasn’t conducive to a workout regimen.
Abigail snorted. “We’re so different,” she said as she laced her fingers together and stretched out her hands. Her expression turned mischievous as she glanced over her shoulder to the men and then peeked at Timothy before she leaned in. “So tell me what happened at the bridal store after we left.”
I flicked my gaze at my son, but he didn’t flinch. His eyes were hazy and his cheeks pink. He was tired but engaged. I doubted he had the energy to eavesdrop on our conversation even if he wanted to.
“It was fine,” I said with a nonchalant shrug.
Abigail’s expression fell flat. “What?” she asked. She didn’t try to hide her disappointment.
I turned my gaze toward the ceiling as if I were attempting to recall the events for Abigail even though they were seared on my soul. “I mean, I tried to get off the pedestal and fell. Noah was there to catch me.”
Abigail let out a soft gasp.
“And I had to have had him help me...” My gaze shifted to Timothy who hadn’t even moved.
“Help you?” Abigail was sitting forward, her eyebrows raised as she stared at me.
I chuckled. “Help me unzip my dress,” I whispered. Even if my son wasn’t paying attention, this wasn’t a conversation I necessarily wanted him to hear.
Abigail’s mouth seemed frozen in a permanent o shape as she slowly relaxed against her chair.
“It’s not a big deal,” I hurried to add.
The last thing I needed was for her to read into this more than was necessary.
It was one thing to let my own mind run wild with interpretations of what the day’s events meant.
It was a whole other thing to breathe life into those words by speaking them so they can live rent free in someone else’s mind.
And from the expression on Abigail's face, she had no intention of bringing her thoughts back down to reality. She had opinions and nothing I could say would dissuade her from having them.
“Emery, what are you talking about, that’s not a big deal.” She blew out her breath causing her lips to vibrate. “That’s a huge deal.”
I shook my head. Even though I wanted to convince her that what had happened between us had been a mundane event, I couldn’t ignore how my heart pounded when I thought about his fingertips as they brushed the skin on my back.
Or the way I could feel his warmth as he stood behind me.
It had been so long since I’d been close to a man and for the first time, that thought didn’t terrify me.
“That’s it,” Abigail said as she clapped her hands and straightened in her seat.
I frowned as I glanced over at her. “Wha-what’s it?” Was it wrong that I was a tad bit scared by her reaction. Abigail seemed determined to force me out of my comfort zone and I feared what she had planned for me next.
“No, no.” She raised her forefinger. “We are going to capitalize on this.” She held my gaze. “I am going to take Timothy tonight and you are going to…” Her eyebrows went up as if that was all she needed to do to finish her sentence.
“I’m going to…” I repeated, not sure where she was going with this and fearing that she was saying what I thought she was saying.
“You’re going to have another night with Noah.” She paused. “Like the other night.”
My cheeks instantly warmed at the mention of the other night. The night where I tossed all inhibitions out the window and kissed Noah. And straddled him. And fell asleep in his bed.
“What? No,” I said as I shook my head.
How would I even pitch that to him? After all, I asked him to help me get over being touched by a man.
It was pretty obvious after spending the night wrapped in his arms I didn’t really have any more issues in that department.
Asking him to do it again just exposed my truth: that I wanted to him to touch me because I wanted him to touch me.
“Oh, girl.” Abigail’s soft voice had me turning to face her.
I frowned. “What?”
“Oh, you have it bad for that man.”
My cheeks were on fire now. “I do not.” I peeked over to the pool where Noah and Bash were chatting while they walked through the shallow end to the stairs.
“Yes, you do.”
I glared at her. I was already so confused about my feelings and the last thing I needed was her assumptions to sway me one way or the other.
“Just, let us take Timothy tonight. If you want to spend it desensitizing yourself to Noah’s touch, you have the freedom to do so. If you just want a good night's sleep, you can do that as well.” She grinned at me. “I just want you to be free to decide.”
I glared at her, but then sighed. Having a night to myself to decompress and think sounded like heaven. “Fine,” I said and then gave her a stern look as Noah and Bash approached us.
“What are you two ladies talking about?” Bash asked as he moved to stand behind Abigail’s chair.
I narrowed my eyes in Abigail’s’ direction once more before shifting my gaze up to Bash. “Not much—”
“Just tonight’s plans.” Abigail turned to smile at Bash. “I told her we could take Timothy again so she could relax.”
Bash glanced over at me. “Yeah, I’m down with that.”
All attention was now on me. Noah, Bash, and Abigail. I felt pinned to my spot. Any rejection of this plan would seem silly so I just smiled.
“I love that idea.”
“Great,” Abigail said as she sent a wink my direction. “Let’s get the table cleaned up and we can get out of your hair.”
All of the garbage was gathered and in the trash in record time. Bash hoisted a squealing Timothy over his shoulder while Abigail assured me that she had a toothbrush, a pair of pajamas, and a Timothy approved nightlight at their place—no need to go up to the room.
Before I could blink, Bash, Abigail, and Timothy were gone leaving me standing next to the pool with a towel wrapped around my body acutely aware of Noah’s presence.
He seemed just as whiplashed as I did. I peeked over at him to see that his gaze was still trained on the doors that Abigail, Bash, and Timothy had just walked through. Heat pulsed through my veins as I studied him. For the first time in years, I felt…desire.
I wanted to kiss Noah. I wanted to kiss kiss Noah. I didn’t want to ask for help and the last thing I wanted was pity. I wanted to kiss him like a woman kissed a man. And I wanted nothing more than for him to want the same.
“I should go to—”
“Wanna go to the hot—”
We both spoke at the same time. I pinched my lips shut as I studied him. His unfinished sentence repeated in my mind as I realized what he wanted to say.
I needed to redeem myself and fast. “Yeah, let’s go to—”
“You want to go to the hot—”
We both spoke and stopped at the same time. His eyes were wide and his cheeks seemed flushed. Was it wrong that I thought he looked adorable?
He raised his eyebrows as if he were inviting me to speak first. Knowing we couldn’t spend the night speaking in half sentences at the same time, I decided to take charge.
“I was going to go to the hot tub,” I said, softly, my heart pounding at the thought of Noah joining me.
“Oh,” he said, his gaze drifting down to the top of my towel before he yanked it back up.
“And you’re going to bed?” I asked.
He cleared his throat as he pushed his hand through his damp hair. “Yeah, I was thinking about it.”
My heart sank a bit. That was the last thing I wanted. When I didn’t know his plans, inviting him seemed like the neighborly thing to do. But I also didn’t know how to ask him to join me without it seeming like I wanted him to join me.
I nodded, not sure where to go with this conversation until I decided that a harmless invite was best. I wanted him to feel free to reject me if he wanted to.
“Well, if you’re sore, you’re free to join me. I hear it’s insane.” I smiled at him. “But if your bed is calling you, I understand.”
Noah’s gaze was trained on me, causing my heart was pounding so loud I could hear it in my ears. What I would give to read this man’s mind. He had to have been a good Navy SEAL. He gave away nothing.
“Are you sure you don’t want some you time?”
I could hear the concern in his voice. He really did think of me all of the time. Too bad this was the one situation where I wanted him to read between the lines and see what I was really asking.
“It’d be nice to have some company.” I offered him a soft smile, making sure to look up at him through my lashes. I wasn’t sure how else to show this man that I was interested in him without saying the words, ‘I like you.’
His eyebrows went up. “Okay.”
The speed in which he responded to my statement startled me. I blinked as my brain tried to process what that meant. Did he just want to spend time in the hot tub and wanted mask that with some push and pull so he didn’t seem to eager? Or did he really want to spend time with me?
“Okay?” I asked, my voice soft.
His expression fell. “Unless, you don’t want me too…”
“I want you too.”
He closed his lips as he studied me. Heat pricked my skin under his scrutiny. I felt like I was back in high school, analyzing his every move. I wished I had Bobbi Jo Pearson here so I could ask her to pass a note to Noah, asking him if he liked me. It was a lot more straightforward back then.