Chapter Two
Magnolia
Hands are tight around my throat, and I can’t make it stop. I can’t breathe. I throw myself out of bed, but I am brought back to reality when strong arms wrap around me. “I’m sorry,” I say tearfully.
After leaving the shop, we stopped by the diner to get food to take back to Beau’s house.
I hardly got through the meal before exhaustion took over.
We tried to watch a movie on the couch, but I fell asleep with my head in his lap.
I am in his room now, so he must have carried me in here.
“You’re okay, Maggie. I’ve got you,” he says softly before sitting on the edge of the bed.
“How long was I asleep?”
“Uh. A while,” he chuckles. “It’s ten at night.”
“Ten?!” I ask, sitting up. “I slept for a day?!”
“You did. I had Henry run the shop, and I stayed here with you,” he says, cupping my cheek. “You need to eat.”
“Why did you let me sleep for so long, Beau?”
“Because you needed the sleep. You don’t look half dead anymore,” he smiles. “Feel better?”
“Yeah,” I say. “I’m surprised I slept that long, is all.”
“You slept pretty soundly when I was next to you. You only ever stirred around when I would leave the room,” he says.
“Was that the only nightmare?”
“Oh, no. That’s the only one you fully woke up for. You have night terrors,” he says.
“I’m sorry,” I frown. “I can-”
“If you suggest that you move somewhere else again, I am going to duct tape your mouth,” he says, and I smile at him.
“You come down from them fairly easily. You have a lot of lead up before you get there, so many of them were avoided by me just lying with you. If you did panic, I would just hold you and you’d settle. ”
“You slept with me?” I ask.
“Not in a creepy way, but yes,” he chuckles.
“Define creepy?” I ask, joining him in laughter.
“I mean I didn’t fuck you in your sleep or anything, but you did sleep cuddle up to me a lot of the time,” he says.
“Seven years and you still have the mind of a teenager,” I smile.
“Baby, men get older, but they never grow up,” he says with another playful grin.
“For the record, I didn’t think you’d fuck me in my sleep, or at all, really. I am surprised that you stayed by my side for an entire day.”
“First, I will be by your side for the rest of our lives. I meant it when I said that you are my girl. No matter if I get to make you my wife one day or if you are just my friend, I will always be here,” he says. “For the record, I would do filthy things to you. Don’t tempt me.”
“I didn’t take you for the desperate type,” I laugh. Beau grabs my waist and abruptly pulls me into his lap to straddle him, and my breath catches in my throat. “Beau, I am touch deprived. Please don’t fuck with my head.”
“What is it going to take for you to understand how fucking serious I am?” he asks.
“Serious about what?” I ask.
“You. This. Us,” he says. “I have spent seven years dreaming of you coming back. Seven years of playing a fantasy through my head of what I would say and do. Tell me right now that you never loved me, and I’ll drop it.”
“I can’t say that,” I whisper.
“And why not?” he asks, taking my face between his hands.
“Because I loved you then and I love you now, Beau,” I admit.
“Chris… he… I still don’t know how he did it.
I had a goal. I had dreams, and he crushed every one of them.
He made it look like it was my idea. He made me feel special and loved.
I was desperate to try and replace you in my mind, so it was easy for him to overwhelm me with affection.
Once I was hooked, he showed me who he really was.
It took less than two months for him to scream at me for the first time.
It took six months for him to hit me and eight months for him to break my wrist. I was hospitalized with a concussion after eighteen months in.
It took me six years to realize that I was being abused.
Six long and painful years for me to want to escape.
The first time I tried to leave, he beat me unconscious.
The next five times I ended up with burns, scars, broken bones…
but… the last time is what did it. I had finally pushed him too far. ”
“What did he do?” he asks gently.
“He strangled me,” I say. “He was on top of me with his hands on my throat. No matter how hard I hit him or how much I thrashed my body to try and get out from under him, he wouldn’t let up.
I knew he was going to kill me if I didn’t fight harder.
I knew that he would finally destroy the last shred of my soul if I didn’t get away from him.
I was able to grab hold of a book that had fallen off the shelf, and I hit him on the side of the head with it.
He was dazed just enough that I was able to get up and run out of the house.
I didn’t stop running until I finally saw a car.
Luckily, it was a cop car. I filed charges and went to a shelter.
They helped me through the court case, and I suppose I could have stayed there, but I just wanted to come home.
I didn’t think I had anything left to come home, too, but I missed being here.
I sold everything of value to buy that piece-of-shit car, and now I have nothing left. ”
“You have me,” he says with a soft smile. “I’ll give you the world, sweet Magnolia. My girl will never know pain like that again.”
“I can’t get hurt again, Beau,” I tell him. “I want to give you what’s left of my heart, but I don’t have much else to give. I do not want you to be disappointed when you realize that the girl you used to know is gone.”
“She’s not gone,” Beau says. “She’s a little scared, but she’s still there inside of you.”
“I want to find her. I just don’t know where to look,” I admit.
“Do you trust me, Magnolia?” he asks.
“With my life,” I say confidently.
“Let me help you find her,” he says, brushing his lips across mine as he moves his hands to my waist.
“You better not make a joke about finding her inside of me,” I smile.
“I was going to say you need to relax in order to escape the demons, but I think I like that one better,” he laughs.
“How do you suppose you can help me relax?” I ask.
“Well, you have a few options,” he says as he moves me to lie on the bed and he settles between my legs.
He has his hands on either side of my body.
Beyond his positioning, he is hardly touching me.
It is I who has my hands on his chest. I am letting instinct lead, and it’s brought me to lying under him with an urge to beg him for more.
“Oh?” I ask.
“We could meditate. We could try yoga. I could give you a massage,” he says.
“Or?”
“Or I can fuck you,” he says with a devious smile.
“I can help you escape your mind while reminding you just how much I care about you. Understand that if you let me inside of you, Magnolia, you will be mine and I will spoil the shit out of you. I will show you all the love that you have been missing.”
“I’m not after anything materialistic, Beau,” I say. “Please don’t think I…”
“I know, sweetheart. I know that’s not what you are after.
I think you would be content living in your car still, which is why I am so confident in this.
We have a lot to learn about each other, and maybe it won’t work out.
Maybe six months down the road, we will decide that we are better off as friends.
I want you to have the reassurance that no matter what happens, I am here.
I will not hurt you, no matter what you say or do.
If you end up moving on to be with another man, I want you to go into it with confidence that you are deserving of love, and you never settle for the abuse that Chris gave you.
All I have ever wanted to do was make you happy, so I’m asking for a chance for you to put a little bit of your trust in my hands. ”
“Okay,” I smile. “Help me escape.”
“Yeah?” he asks with a smile.
“I really need for you to quit being sweet for a moment and fuck me like it’s a punishment for running away,” I say.
“Oh, sweet Magnolia,” he says as he sits back. “Be careful what you wish for.”
Beau and I are driven by pure instinct as we get undressed.
He is moving slightly faster than my anxiety is building, and I’m incredibly thankful for that.
He moves down my body, gently kissing every scar and physical reminder of the abuse I endured.
As long as I stay focused on his touch, I can relax.
“My sweet Magnolia,” he sings as he settles on the bed between my legs. I am nearly panting when he wraps his thick arms around my thighs. “I wonder if you taste as sweet as you look.”
“Beau,” I whimper softly. Something about the subtleness of his dominance is indicative that he is going to absolutely wreck me.
Instead of responding, he flicks his tongue across my clit. I gasp and arch off the bed, so he keeps doing it. “Oh my God,” I moan.
“I am your God now, Magnolia,” he says as he looks up at me from between my trembling thighs. “Now, pray for me.”
When he returns his mouth to my pussy, he starts sucking on my clit.
I’m starting to come undone at the seams already, but this sends me headfirst over the edge.
I twist my body, and he promptly rolls and pulls me on top of him.
I grab hold of the headboard to keep myself steady as he wraps his arms tightly around my thighs to ensure that I cannot escape his mouth.
His wonderful fucking mouth. Christ, is this what I’ve missed out on for seven years?
All my worries feel insignificant when he is making me feel this good.
I can finally see the light, and it reminds me that it was always there.
I just had to open my eyes and look for it.
I am looking now, and all I see is Beau and his radiant soul drawing me in.