Chapter 31
OLIVIA
Someone doesn’t need to make it to the last page of your story for their impact to resonate through your entire life.
—Olivia’s Secret Thoughts
“It was a beautiful service, honey,” Mom tells me as she pours herself a cup of coffee from one of the two carafes set up in the kitchen by the caterers earlier today. Jasper loved this ranch like it was a member of his own family, so it was only fitting we celebrate his life here.
“It was.” I shake my head when she offers me the cup.
Avoiding caffeine has been much easier than avoiding electronics since I’ve come home from the hospital, but my head is finally starting to feel somewhat back to normal, so I can keep it up for a few more days at this point.
“It still doesn’t seem real. I keep expecting him to walk around the corner and call me St. James, like it’s the worst insult he could possibly come up with. ”
“Really?” She smiles such a genuine smile, it settles my heart.
My mother has stepped up for my family in ways I could never have asked her to do.
With grief sitting so heavy on the rest of us, Mom came and helped plan the services.
She organized the caterers, the flowers, and the servers.
She helped Waverly go through Jasper’s office to find all his documents.
His will. His everything . . . All the things no one could bring themselves to do, my mother did without ever being asked.
Just another reason I’ve spent my life wanting to be her.
“Have I ever told you he didn’t like me right away? He kind of hated that we got married in Vegas,” I admit, remembering the look he gave me that first night.
“It’s hard to realize you can’t always protect your siblings, Livvy. Especially when they’re your younger siblings. He was probably struggling with that. But I doubt he hated you.”
“Maybe.” I shrug and turn to look through the window to the backyard where Knight is chasing Magnolia, while Brynlee and Deacon stand off to the side, watching. “Mom . . .”
She brushes my hair over my shoulders and wraps an arm around them.
“Thank you for everything. For being such an amazing mother and role model. For giving me everything and showing me everything. For not losing your mind when I told you I was married . . .”
“I’m just glad you finally came around and realized anyone who wanted you to prove your worthiness to work with them by getting married didn’t deserve your name on their letterhead, Olivia.”
I turn my head to hers as her words register, and my world tilts. “You knew?”
“Oh, honey . . . There’s nothing in my world I don’t know.” Her blue eyes crinkle as her lips purse. “But don’t worry. I didn’t tell anyone else.”
“Not even Dad?” Oh, this is so bad.
“Not even Dad,” she confirms, and I’m shocked.
“Why?”
“Because I raised you better than that, Liv. Because I know you, and I had faith. Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely would have told your father, who may or may not have maimed your husband if he knew, but I wanted to give you a chance first.” I narrow my eyes in question, and her all-knowing smile grows.
“During dinner at our house . . . it was immediately obvious there was more to the two of you.”
I look back outside and see Logan and Rafe join Brynlee and Deacon, and the emotion that’s been simmering just under the surface bubbles up again. “So it was a test?”
“Not really, Liv. It was more a confirmation. It was always going to be you and Logan. I just needed to see it to make sure I was right.”
“What do you mean?” Deacon says something to Logan and Rafe that has them laughing, and my heart skips a beat. I’m not sure there’s been much laughter in our house in the past week.
“Just trust there are certain things a mother knows, Olivia, and that boy looked at you like you hung the moon.”
“At your house?” I ask, and she shakes her head.
“No, honey. When you were in college. He’s not the only one who was watching back then, Liv.”
I look at my mother like I’m seeing her for the very first time. “You’re a little scary sometimes, Mom.”
“I’m more than a little scary, Livvy.” She kisses my temple and steps away.
“I need you to know how proud I am of the woman you’ve become.
You’re stronger than I ever was. You’re motivated, you’re intuitive, and you love with your whole heart.
Remember that when things get tough, and you and Logan will be just fine. ”
“I love you, Mom.” And as I step outside and the cool fall air wraps around me, I take my first deep breath in what feels like forever and look over at my family. At my husband and my daughter. The two loves of my life. And my heart settles in a way I’m not sure I knew it could.
I step over the toys splayed out on the patio and into Logan’s open arms. “Hey, Olive.”
“Hi.” I ghost my lips over his and rest my head on his shoulder. “You doing okay?”
“Not really,” he admits and drops his hand to my hip. “But I will be.”
“We all will,” Rafe adds, and we stand there, watching Magnolia chase Knight in circles, her happy laughter bittersweet as Rafe wraps an arm around my back, sandwiching me between the two brothers.
“Hands off, asshole,” Logan growls, but I think it’s more joking than menacing.
“But I’m sad,” Rafe jokes, and a smile curves my lips.
“But he’s sad, Logan . . .” I tease as my husband tugs me away from Rafe.
“Go find your own wife to cheer you up then,” Logan jokes, and the steel band around my heart loosens. “I saw Serena around here somewhere.”
Rafe arches a brow, and I shake my head. “Don’t even think about it, Langley.”
“Let him go,” Logan grumbles and pulls me against him. “How are you doing, Olive?”
“Pretty sure that’s my line, Adler.” I hold him close, the way I’ve done every day since I woke up in that damn hospital. “Are you okay?”
“No. But I will be. We all will. The best way to honor my brother is to live a life he’d be proud of.”
“He was already proud of you, Logan,” I remind him, even if it hurts to hear. “He loved you so much.”
“You know he loved you too, right?” Logan asks, and my stomach drops. “The last thing he told me was to never let you go. He knew you were the best thing that ever happened to me.”
I pull back and run my fingers along his temple, staring into those beautiful blue eyes. “Yeah well, he knew you were the best thing that ever happened to me too, husband. I love you.”
“I love you too, Liv. Always. Forever.”
“Forever, Adler.”