Chapter 37
Chapter Thirty-Seven
LOLA
It is hard to breathe, and my throat is closing over as my pulse pounds hard.
Shit.
I'm glad that Enzo has stepped out to do God only knows what. But it doesn't stop the panic or the ache inside, and it doesn't stop the anger at myself.
For giving over my initial hate of Enzo to lust and mistaking it for genuine feelings.
I hover at the edge of reason, at least for the moment, and I'm cut free, bobbing on uncertainty with paranoia breathing down my neck, bringing with it a slew of what-ifs.
"Don't you think, Lola?"
Lyndall's voice drags me out of my thoughts, and I smile at her, forcing the curve of my lips.
"Sorry, I was thinking about work."
The girl rolls her eyes. "Work? Boring."
"Leave poor Lola alone, kid."
Enzo's friend, Cade, is here.
He ruffles her hair, and she playfully swats him away. And yes, I see why Lyndall had a crush on him. He is cute and sweet, and he treats her like an equal.
Beyond that crush, they are comfy with each other.
She might trust him, but I don't.
I don't think I trust any single one of Enzo's friends.
Enzo...with all those photos. The ability to spy on me. Does that mean all of these guys who are in the hacking world with him have seen me? Naked?
My stomach turns.
I didn't see anything of me and Alex, which would have let me see him, but clearly, he got into my system.
Enzo would have seen, right?
Suddenly, anger flares, scorching me.
Enzo couldn't even include a photo of Alex.
I take a breath. I'm focusing on the wrong thing.
All these men, though. Have they seen me naked?
Do they all stalk as a group?
But isn't Cade married? I glance over, and his ring glints in the light coming in from the kitchen window, and right now Lyndall is asking after Vi, his wife.
I pick up a cloth and start to wipe the island.
Okay, maybe none of them know that Enzo has been stalking me, but it is like my thoughts are spiraling fast, down into dark and horrible depths.
I grab the edge of the island as my world tips, and my balance heaves off-center.
Lyndall comes at me with a spoon. "It needs salt. Don't you think?"
Cade and Lyndall have been cooking some spaghetti sauce for later tonight—they raided the freezer and the bag of groceries that apparently Lyndall unpacked early this morning.
I take a tiny taste, then pick up the chopping board to take to the sink. "The sauce is good."
"Yeah, but... salt."
"Umami." Cade snatches the spoon, tossing it in the dishwasher. He takes the board and knife and hand-washes those, making Lyndall sigh. "And we will adjust later."
"Look at you, cooking."
He shakes his head and sets the board and knife on the drying rack. "A little. I cook a little."
"I think you're brilliant." Lyndall has seemingly forgotten about her woes that brought her here, and the young man...which really drives home to me they weren't having a relationship.
She is fifteen. If she had gone and entered a relationship, then she would be all about that inappropriate guy.
But none of this means I can trust any of them. Except, I think, Lyndall.
Who is only fifteen. And the man I don't trust is her brother.
I don't even know...I can't think... "Hey, guys. I'm gonna get back to work."
I'm almost out of the kitchen when Cade speaks. "We should probably all hang out together."
"Am I in danger? Here? With you?"
It is the closest I get to asking him point-blank if it is a scam.
And then I remember the dead bodies.
I want to ask him if they were really to do with me or if they were about something else.
Enzo isn't just a CEO. He is mafia through his father, and he is a hacker. Playing in the shadows and on the wrong side of the law is in his blood. Someone could come after him for something he has done. And he could have used it to get me alone.
With his sister and his friends.
My head starts to pound.
Cade winces. "C'mon, I'm a married man. You're safe with me. Actually, I might need protecting. This young violinist has designs on me—ow!"
He rubs his arm where she punched him.
"Don't be mean. I think you're a nerd."
He shakes his head. "Lyndall, I will tell Vi you're mean to me."
She pokes her tongue out at him. "Vi would agree with me."
He points at her with his thumb. "See? Mean."
"She just likes me best."
"Probably," he says.
Their banter is cute and comfortable, and he doesn't seem the type to want to get thrills by spying on me with Enzo. Or helping him do that.
Maybe it is all real. Or maybe Enzo is the one I can't trust.
I don't know.
Which is the point.
I don't know anything. The dynamics, or what the hell Enzo is doing with a computer full of me. I just can't stop spinning, and my thoughts keep eating themselves.
What if they don't know he is some kind of psycho, either?
"I'm not leaving the house. But I do need to finish work."
Lyndall rolls her eyes. "Ugh. Don't be lame."
"I'm not lame."
"You are. She's lame, right?" And she looks to Cade for backup.
He scratches his head, nearly knocking his glasses off. "Why don't we put this ragu on low, let it slowly simmer, and we can play cards?"
"Poker?" she asks.
"I'm not teaching you poker, kid." He grins at me with a wink.
She goes to the pantry and comes out with toothpicks. "I know how to play. We can play for these."
He nods. "Okay. But after that, we're playing Go Fish."
She turns to me, all big eyes and pleading expression. "Play? Puh-leaze?"
I crumble. "For a game or two, but then—"
She scowls. "Work. Yeah, yeah."
Reluctantly, I join them.
The game starts with Cade shuffling the cards, going over the rules, which has Lyndall putting on her best poker face, which isn't good at all, probably down there with mine.
But she wins the first game, and the cards are dealt a second time.
It is hard to concentrate, and I know I need to relax. Enzo isn't here, and...maybe I'm not in actual danger.
Oh. God.
What if this is an elaborate ploy to get me alone, somewhere isolated?
But if that is true, why would it be here, with his friends, and why would he bring Lyndall?
And why the hell would he want me alone anyway? What would he do?
Murder, rape, torture, they all pass through my head, and my brain snags on rape, because that one doesn't fit. He knows I want him, and he wouldn't need to get me alone.
He has had me. So...
Shit, I need to stop being so paranoid.
I can't breathe all over again, and I look at them both, lingering on Cade because there is a concerned expression in his gaze, one that tells me he knows a lot more than he is letting on.
Or maybe it is my rampant paranoia.
"I'm folding. I...I need to do some work." I make myself say his name. "Enzo wants it for Barwon."
I don't wait. I get up and scurry to the study. But all I do is grab my phone and lock myself in the bathroom off the study.
And I take a breath, turning on my phone.
Messages come in. From Ruby. And one from Alex.
I desperately want to respond to that, but I can't.
I shouldn't even have my phone on...
Fuck it.
Me
I will explain when I see you.
I press send.
Alex responds seconds later.
Alex
Explain what? Where are you?
And for the first time since we started texting, I think of lying to him. I shouldn't even be texting. Sucking in air is like breathing in shards of broken glass.
Me
Long story.
Alex
Explain.
So, I lie, and it fucking hurts.
I like him as much as I like Enzo...as much as I liked Enzo.
Me
Something happened. I'm away. Let's just say it's a work thing.
Alex
Ok. Where are you?
If I'm wrong about Enzo, then I could be putting Lyndall in danger.
Me
Connecticut. Anyway, not ignoring you. Will explain when I get back.
I take deep, hulking breaths and then I look up the hospital and Simon Black.
Simon is there. Listed on the page.
Shit, here I was thinking he might be lying or worse, he might be this Silas, the PI. But there he is, on the website, complete with his picture.
A respected trauma surgeon. Which, to be honest, explains this property.
I have got Silas's number programmed in, and I call him.
He picks up, and I jump right in.
"Silas? This is Lola Carino. I-I was wondering if you could help me. I will pay, of course."
"Consider this added to Alex's bill. What help do you need?"
"It's about Enzo. The guy you researched? My boss?"
"What about him?"
I suck in air. "I think he might be stalking me. He has pictures of me and... Just in case, I need something I can use against him."
"Fuck."
"Yeah. If it helps, I have files I copied that I found on his laptop."
"Can you email them?"
"Yes."
And then he says, "Do it. I will see what I can dig up."
"Thank you."
When I end the call moments later, I try to breathe out relief. But honestly, I just hope and pray he comes up with something that will get me out of this mess.
Or even clear Enzo's name.
But it is not about want. Because if it were, I would want the latter.
It is about what I need.
And I need the truth.
And maybe a path out.
I hope Silas can find it.