Chapter Six
Erik
Things turn strained between us so quickly that I feel like I’ve got whiplash. In a few short hours, I find myself robbed of that sunny smile and the soft look she carried in those beautiful brown eyes when she’d look at me.
“I love you so much!”
The words ring in my head, like they have from the moment I heard them, as we head back to the island for the last time.
I’ve thought of those words, played them over and over in my head, convinced myself that it was the heat of the moment and that she didn’t mean them.
Surely no one falls in love that fast. Right?
But I know the answer as soon as I have the thought. It is absolutely possible to develop feelings in a few days. I know because I’ve done it myself.
Goddamn it!
I turn to where Astrid is seated, arms folded over the railing as she stares out at the water. She hasn’t said more than two words to me since we found Moon. She’s shut me out. And fuck if that doesn’t sting, but it’s my own fault.
I don’t have a choice though. I can’t risk opening my heart to Astrid only to lose yet another person. Losing Astrid might be the thing that finally breaks me.
Falling for Astrid was out of my hands but admitting it out loud and asking for more is out of the question.
She’s meant to travel the sea and follow her sharks where they lead her, and I am meant for this island. Asking her to stay or me to leave is unfair to us both.
And she would stay. A part of me believes she would if I asked, but what kind of an asshole would that make me?
I am in love with her. The woman with the prettiest smile, eyes the shade of rich soil, a body that could send a man to his knees, and a pure heart I want to protect. The same heart I broke when I met her confession with silence.
Goddamnit!
I am in a terrible mood when I dock the boat. Astrid is already climbing out before I can offer my help, and she doesn't wait for me to secure the boat before she’s off without a single word. My jaw clenches as I fight the urge to call out to her, to give her what she wants, but…I can’t.
I won’t.
No, I will not be the selfish son of a bitch who asks her to abandon her dreams, so I linger outside, giving myself and her some space.
Still, my effort to respect her distance falls apart when I remember that tonight is the last night I’ll have her with me.
Tomorrow, Josh will show up and ferry her away.
Will I ever see her again?
Fuck!
I storm to the cottage, determined to talk to her and make her understand why we can never work, but I step inside just as she’s stepping out of the bathroom, hair dripping with water and a small towel wrapped around her waist.
For a long moment, we stand frozen in place, watching each other as one would a ticking bomb. There is no stopping my eyes from running hungrily over her body, and I know…fuck, I know I ought to keep away. For my own sanity and hers. But I don’t.
I start to move before my brain can come to terms with what I’m doing, and I have her pressed up against the wall, pinned with my hips before I have a chance to stop myself. She doesn’t stop me either. Those beautiful eyes meet mine with such hunger that it sends my cock hardening to steel.
I love you . It’s at the tip of my tongue. Stay .
My hands move of their own accord, dropping down from her waist, under the tiny towel, to her ripe ass. Her lips part in a whimper when I knead her cheeks roughly, pulling her flush against my erection and humping her against the wall.
Frustration claws at me as I stare into her eyes, hating that I can’t give us the one thing we both seem to want. That I am not brave enough to admit it to her when she’s been nothing but honest with me. Nothing but perfect.
Mine.
She’s still mine until sunrise. Until Josh’s boat arrives and she has to leave. She’s still mine, goddamnit!
“Touch me, angel,” I growl, squeezing her ass cheeks hard and groaning when those delicate fingers dip between us.
She runs her palm over my erection first, then lowers the zipper, the sound obnoxiously loud in the small hallway.
I groan when she takes me in her hand, those pretty eyes locked on mine as she strokes me, her gaze flaring with need and affection.
“I want to hate you,” she whispers, brushing her lips softly over mine as she pushes down my pants, raises her leg to my waist, and guides the tip of my cock to her wet, pulsing entrance. “You are so cruel, but I can’t hate you on our last night.”
“I don’t want you to hate me, baby.”
“Then what do you want?”
“You!” I growl as I slam forward, driving my cock hard and deep into her. She cries out, her back arching off the wall and eyes rolling back as pleasure rolls through her body, turning her pussy wetter. “I want you.” Always.
Mine.
The thought is possessive, dangerously so, but I surrender to it as I rip the towel off her and toss it away before lifting her off the ground and bracing her to the wall with my cock buried in her.
She throws her head back, thumping it against the wall when I pull out, leaving just the tip before driving back into her wet cunt.
“Erik!” she cries out, gripping my shoulders hard when I begin to ride her like a maniac.
I dip my head to her chest and suck a nipple into my mouth, drawing at it as I pound my cock into her, violent in my thrusts.
I can't help it. Can't control the need burning inside of me.
That need reminds me that this may be the last time I experience pleasure this consuming.
“I love you so much.”
“Mine!” I growl against her breasts, fucking her against the wall like a madman, squeezing her ass cheeks as I claim her. As I mark her for myself, selfishly hoping she’ll never want the touch of another man.
Mine!
“Harder, Erik,” she sobs, gripping tight on my shoulders as she rolls her hips to meet my thrusts. “Harder…yes! Oh God!”
I graze my teeth over her nipple as I hammer into her, causing her to erupt.
She screams, legs flailing around my waist as her pussy ripples around my cock.
Her climax is as beautiful as the rest of her, and I file away the memory of it even as I peel her off the wall and lower her to the floor where I dropped her towel.
She’s limp from pleasure, her arms falling weakly off my shoulders, but I am not done.
Blood pounds wildly in my ears as I slam back into her, feral with need to possess her. To give her pleasure over and over again until she remembers nothing but this moment. Not even the heartbreak that will follow.
None of it.
“You’re mine!” I growl, cupping her jaw so she’s looking me in the eyes and reading there all the words I can’t say. All the words I can only prove to her in our lovemaking. “Say it, angel. Say that you’re mine.”
“No.” She shakes her head as tears gather in her eyes. “It’s not true.”
“It is!” I grind out, pulling out and thrusting into her, watching those glistening eyes roll back with pleasure. I roll my hips, pressing hard into her. My balls threatening to release, but I hold back. Not until I get what I want. “You will say it before the night is over. You’re mine!”
“No!”
I slam my mouth back to hers, tasting the tears and her stubbornness on her lips when she opens up for me. She returns the kiss with just as much hunger, meeting my tongue needily with hers. “Say it, baby.”
She moans, bucking wildly at the threat of another climax. When I slow down, she whines, scratching at my back in frustration. “Erik!”
“You’re mine. Say it, baby. Say it, and I will give you that sweet release.”
“Erik,” she whines, dropping her hands to my hips and trying to get me to move faster, but I hold back, torturing us both with my slow pace. “Okay! I’m yours. Please…please.”
I rear back and slam hard into her, sending us both off the edge.
She screams, pleasure rolling through her body, her pussy seizing around my throbbing cock as I stroke into her, painting her walls with long ropes of my own release.
I roar as every muscle in my body strains against the climax, my breathing shot.
“You’re mine,” I rasp, burying my face in her neck and losing myself in her soft, feminine scent. For long moments, neither of us speaks. There aren’t words for what happened, but I have no intention for it to end just yet.
I want her. Still.
She doesn’t protest when I lift her off the floor and carry her to the bedroom; instead, she clings on to me as I lay her down on the bed and make love to her all over again, slow and sweet.
For the next several hours, I don’t stop until she drops face down onto the bed, limp with exhaustion, and immediately shuts down.
She barely stirs when I leave the bed or when I come back with a wet towel to clean the mess between her thighs.
She doesn’t move an inch when I join her in bed and pull her into my arms.
I don’t sleep.
Not for one second during the night do I close my eyes, and when dawn lights the room, they’re still open. I wake her with my lips on her skin, and she’s fully awake when I slide into her wetness. There’s longing in her eyes, mirroring the ache in my chest.
The ball is in my court. I could ask her to stay. I could…
I shut down those thoughts, hugging her close to my chest as I send her over before following.
She barely glances my way when she comes back from the shower and begins to pack. There are no words traded between us as she gathers her things and hides her reaction from me when I offer to carry them to shore.
Josh arrives moments later with his boat, and if he notices the strange tension between us, he doesn’t speak about it.
Instead, he unloads my supplies and loads her things onto the boat.
I feel a twinge of jealousy when he offers his hand to help her on board, and a part of me wants to snatch her away, carry her back to the cottage and lock us in but… I don’t.
“Astrid,” I call out to her, noting the way she stills but doesn’t turn around to look at me. “Take care of yourself.”
She doesn't respond. Instead, she walks to a seat, leans over the railing, and stares out to the water. Josh’s eyes shift between us curiously before he decides to mind his own business.
“Almost forgot your mail!”
I grab the package he tosses at me before he starts the boat and begins the delicate process of pulling away from the rocky shore. I stand in place, watching the small vessel disappear on the horizon, and even after, I linger.
Mine.
She hasn’t been gone for more than five minutes, and I miss her so much that it’s clawing at me. I press a hand to my chest when the ache intensifies, and I realize that I’ve made the biggest fucking mistake of my life.
My heart is in my throat as I glance down at the bundle of mail in my hand. The top envelope is from the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service. I can tell by the stamp on the envelope, and even without opening it, I know deep down it carries answers to my fate on the island.
Still, as I stare at the letter, I realize that what’s inside doesn’t matter anymore.
For eight years, I’ve poured my heart and soul into this island. But now, how can I stay here when the two most important parts of myself just left on a boat minutes ago?
There’s nothing here for me anymore.