Chapter Three
I am laughing so hard that tears are wetting my cheeks. Thane just watches me with a smile until I can speak. “I just fucking humped you like a dog, and you praised me like one. What the fuck?” I laugh.
“Should I get a newspaper and punish you for making a mess of my leg instead?” he questions with a smirk.
“No,” I giggle, but then stop. I feel frozen at the realization.
“What is it?”
“I’m… happy,” I say. “I haven’t felt happy in… a long time. Why am I happy?”
“Pretty girl, I am a sex and trauma therapist, not a psychic. Why are you happy?” Thane asks, resting his hands on my thighs as I straddle his lap.
“This,” I say. “I’m just… comfortable.”
“For now,” he says. “I’m not pushing you out of your comfort zone yet. You are hypersexual, and I’m allowing you to feed that trauma response in a way that isn’t triggering you.”
“What would trigger me?” I ask.
“Want me to show you?” he asks, and I nod.
Thane suddenly stands and spins me around before shoving me over the side of the bed.
It flips a switch in my head, and I instantly panic.
“Wait! Stop!” I yell as he positions himself between my thighs, where my feet are dangling.
I try to push back to get up, but he pulls my arms behind my back to hold my wrists with one hand.
His other hand moves between my thighs and starts rubbing my clit, making me audibly sob.
“You have a safe word, Ayla. Use it when you need, or I won’t stop,” he warns.
I try to thrash out of his hold. I don’t want him to stop, though.
How fucked up is that? I want him to force me; I just don’t want to hurt.
I can’t help but wonder, though. If I say the safe word right before he is going to come, would he stop?
Thane has me moaning into the bed in short order, but I’m still crying. When he grabs my hips and slowly pushes his cock into me, I freeze as he stretches me.
“Fuck,” I growl. “Too big.”
“Mine,” he groans. “All mine now.”
“Prove it,” I challenge him. I want to get him worked up and then see if he is true to his word. This may be a stupid way of finding out, but I have to know. Thane holds onto my waist tightly as I grip onto the blanket, screaming into the mattress as he fucks me hard and deep.
My eyes roll back, and I am on the verge of coming when I realize that no one has come in me since the professor raped me. The mere thought of him instantly flips that panic switch again, and I scream the word.
“Red!” I shout. “Red! Red! Please stop. Please don’t. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” I hardly got the word out of my mouth, and he instantly stopped and scooped me into his arms. I still go on a spiral of saying the word over and over again while apologizing for something that he clearly saw coming.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry,” I cry into his chest as he holds me.
“Shhh, Ayla. You did so well,” Thane says gently. “I’m so proud of you.”
“Why?” I sniffle and sit back to look at him. “I never intended to let you finish.”
“I know,” he says, cupping my cheek. “I never intended to either.”
“Why?”
“Because I wanted to find where that line was for you,” he tells me.
“The last person to come in me was the professor,” I say. “I knew I planned to see if you’d stop, but then I was about to… and I thought maybe you would… I’m sorry.”
“Are you sorry because you think you’ve done something wrong?”
“Kinda,” I admit. “But I just feel bad that you wanted to come.”
“Considering you swallowed my come, Ayla, I think I will be perfectly fine if I don’t come for a second time,” Thane says with a smile.
“How many people have you trained?” I ask.
“Formally in this setting?” he asks, and I nod. “None.”
“That’s comforting,” I say with a frown.
“Ayla, my name is Thane Meridian. I own this facility. Reid knows where I do the best, and he feels that we would make a good team,” he says.
“Oh shit,” I say. “Well, that actually is comforting. Why don’t you train, though?”
“I usually am just in charge and help where I am needed,” he tells me. “But I have a thing for cute little brats.”
“I’m afraid I will get used to you and then feel abandoned when the six weeks are over,” I admit.
“As long as we don’t hate each other at the end of this, I will be more than happy to keep working with you outside of here. It’s not unheard of for that dynamic to continue after the program,” he says. “For now, we just focus on goals.
“Which are?”
“Coping skills, including preventative measures, daily living, and anger management, are the most important,” he says.
“So you need to be able to identify when you are triggered before you spiral. Being able to identify it before it gets out of control is the first step. You seem to be progressing nicely with that. I’ve caught you a few times identifying when you are getting upset. ”
“Sometimes I can, just not with anger. It’s like I’ve replaced wanting to kill myself with wanting to knock the fuck out of everybody who pisses me off.”
“So, our first step is to be able to identify when you are getting mad and then just focus on separating yourself rather than reacting. Learning how to walk away is the biggest skill you can master. Once you walk away, that’s when you can truly find a way to cope,” he tells me.
“So, understand I’m going to intentionally and repeatedly try to piss you off.
I don’t want that to make you feel guilty, because I’m absolutely doing it intentionally. ”
“But I’ll still get punished if I hit you,” I laugh.
“You will, but you must learn that people do have self-restraint. Me pissing you off and not reacting to your anger is going to show you far more than you realize.”
“Like when I said the safe word, and you stopped,” I say.
“Exactly. It’s immersive therapy. That doesn’t always work for everyone, but I think you are one of the ones who will manage best by facing everything head-on.”
“What now?” I ask.
“Now, you can mingle and meet the others, or you can relax here,” he says.
“Or…” I say slowly. “You can finish fucking me.”
“How do you suppose we do that without triggering you?”
“Is there a position that doesn’t put me on top, but you don’t have me bent over or under you?” I ask.
Thane smiles at me before turning and laying me on my side. He straddles the leg closest to the bed as he brings the top leg up to hook over his arm. He grips onto my thigh as he slowly fills me with his cock, and my eyes flutter closed as I relax into the bed.
“Oh, that’s good,” I groan.
“I’m going to fill you with my come, Ayla. You’re going to take me like the good girl you are,” Thane grunts. “Fuck, you feel incredible.”
“More!” I pant.
“Tell me what you want,” he demands, slowing his pace.
“Thane!” I complain.
“Tell me,” he repeats.
“Hard! Please, just… hard,” I groan. “Fuck, please.”
“Is my sweet girl asking me to hurt her?” Thane grunts as he pulls out of me.
I open my mouth to respond as he slams his cock into me so hard that my back arches as I scream out.
He does it again and again, quickening his pace with every violent thrust. Soon, he can’t get the leverage he needs to fuck me, so he rolls me to my back and pushes my knees to my chest. This allows him to start in on a frenzy where the triggers don’t even know where I went.
This man fucks me so hard and fast that I’m screaming through orgasms so intense that I can’t think.
Before I know it, he is exploding inside of me. “Fuck!” I gasp, “Oh, fuck! I can feel it. Jesus, you’re too big.”
“Jesus, Ayla. Your cunt is a drug,” he grunts as he drops my legs and buries his face between my thighs.
He dives into my pussy as he wraps his arms around my thighs to keep me pinned in place.
As he eats his come out of me, he brings orgasms to the surface that leave me sobbing.
By the time he finally pulls away, I am unable to speak or think, and I’m shaking so badly that all I can do is melt into his chest when he lies down with me.
“I’m already so fucking hooked on you, Ayla. How am I ever going to give you up?” Thane murmurs into my hair.