Chapter 19
JACE
Ash didn’t even make it halfway through the movie before they were out cold.
They warned the doctor earlier that the last time they were on anything stronger than acetaminophen with codeine that they had some weird side effects, so the doctor prescribed Dilaudid for them.
According to the doc, it should keep him relaxed and pain free for the next couple of days.
He said most people just report needing to sleep a lot while on it.
My anxiety always creeps up when someone I love has to take prescription pain medication because of my mother.
She was always just one back spasm or sprained ankle away from me almost dying on the streets because the rent money and food stamps card would get handed over to her dealer.
There was almost always a delay between her falling back into her addictions and when social services would step in because I never turned her in.
I wanted her to choose me over the drugs, the booze, the revolving door of men and parties…
“Can we watch another one?” Gerry asks softly when the credits start rolling on the television.
Glancing at the time on my phone, I want to say no.
It’s now well after ten, and his bedtime for the summer is an agreed upon eleven each night.
However, I also don’t know if Ash is going to have any issues tonight.
Some people have vivid night terrors on pain medication, and I don’t want to have Gerry ever be scared of Ash.
“I’ll lift the time restrictions on your TV for tonight only, but you gotta go take your bath now and get ready for bed.”
The joy on his face gives me the warm and fuzzies even though I know he’s just happy he gets to watch cartoons in bed all night. He will likely fall asleep before midnight, but the constant noise all night will help to drown out anything with Ash at the back of the trailer.
That’s another reason I asked Jackson, Matt, Theo, and Eric to put Ash’s bed in the back bedroom.
Not only is his bed the only thing that would have fit in the smaller room, he would also be sharing a very thin wall with Gerry.
He shouldn’t have to sacrifice his… personal time…
for my little brother’s sake. My own extra curricular activities will be happening at the workshop for the foreseeable future.
With my brother using the shower in the hallway, I carefully lift the sleeping Ash into my arms to carry them back to the bedroom.
After tucking them under the blanket, I remove the brace and place their arm on top of Sox.
He might not be the prettiest bear, but he is soft and extra squishy since Clarence gave him a makeover last month.
“Is Ash really gonna be okay?”
I glance up from the person in my bed to see a side of my little brother I have never seen but that his therapist has mentioned to me.
I don’t like seeing the worry and insecurity on his face and hate that it mirrors exactly what I was feeling during those agonizing moments after hearing Ash scream earlier.
Fuck. Was that really just hours ago?
“Ash’ll be just fine in a couple of days,” I tell him and open my arms for his goodnight hug. “Nothing is broken. The medicine for the pain just makes them sleepy.”
Gerry tightens his arms around my waist and it takes every ounce of self control in me to not react to his whispered words.
“Dad was supposed to be just sleeping because of medicine, too.”
Part of me wants to strangle Mrs. Stevens for putting that idea in his head, but I can’t really blame her.
The social worker likely couldn’t say anything at the time of placement since it was so sudden and we didn’t really know anything yet.
Explaining severe head trauma to a terrified eight-year-old kid without basically saying “prepare for your dad to die, kid” couldn’t have been easy.
Only now, the glimpse of hope she gave him is going to haunt him every time someone he knows needs any kind of sedation.
Making a mental note to email his therapist before I turn in myself, I lead Gerry to his room and set him up to start a One Piece marathon.
Even if he somehow manages to stay awake all night, there are more than enough episodes to drown out anything he might end up hearing until morning.
Sure enough, the sounds of Luffy and his adventures come through the shared wall while I grab some clean underwear so that I can take a quick shower and grab my stuff from the master bathroom.
Ash appears to be sleeping pretty peacefully, only having kicked off the blanket while I was gone.
Since they don’t appear to be cold at all, I leave them be to head into the bathroom.
It will be easier to shower back here and then carry everything in the towel since I have to throw the dirty towel in the washing machine anyways.
Plus, I would rather be closer to Ash in case they need me so that Gerry doesn’t get disturbed.
In the shower, my thoughts wander through the events of the day. It started off so well. Mama Sue met Gerry through a video call over cereal. She is loving the cruise with all of her poker buddies from the VA. It was actually her suggestion to treat Ash to something nice.
I just wish the rest of the day went according to plan.
Between the injury and me destroying their home, I can’t decide what the worst part was.
Perhaps it was my own feelings of incompetence for how they were treated everywhere we went.
It was aggravating seeing so many people misgendering them between the urgent care and the pharmacy.
They were dressed in loose shorts and one of my t-shirts because it was what was in the van and the people at urgent care said they couldn’t come in without a shirt or shoes.
Even with writing it on the physical paperwork and the online forms, the people in the office still used “he” and “mister” and “sir” the entire time we were there.
The pharmacy was worse. At least at urgent care, there wasn’t already a file for Ash.
I know for a fact that it is in the system at the pharmacy that Ash is to be addressed by gender neutral pronouns because the name on the prescription says “Mx Ashton Harper” and not “Mr. Ashton Harper” on the label.
The pharmacist herself is really good about being respectful.
The technician today was just a bigoted bitch that I now know to avoid in the future.
Shutting off the water, I hear a noise from the bedroom and pop my head out of the bathroom to see Ash is starting to get dangerously close to the edge of the bed with his squirming.
Considering he is seconds away from ending up on the floor, I forego putting on my boxers and rush over with just the towel around my waist. With probably half a second to spare, I manage to put my body between him and the floor, nearly knocking the breath out of my lungs.
Having his warm body on top of mine makes my dick start to take notice again, and I curse under my breath at my body’s extremely inappropriate timing.
While trying to re-learn to breathe and not wake the slumbering person now squirming on top of me, I can’t help but notice that their breathing has gotten more shallow.
Looking down at them on my chest, I meet their hungry gaze.
Okay, so I guess they are not asleep anymore.
“Mmmm. My naughty Biker Bear.” Ash mumbles after licking one of my tattoos and starts actively rocking their body against mine, making the towel completely fall away.
Now, I have always prided myself on having self-control out of the wazoo. I have zero clue where the fuck it is at this moment while I am practically frozen in shock at the way Ash is looking at me.
“Be my teddy tonight and let me play.”
The whisper of a yes barely leaves my lips before Ash crashes his mouth to mine and removes my ability to think at all.