32. Chapter 31 Carter
M ay 2024
As soon as I’m off the podium, any niceties I feel compelled to display vanish. I bypass the media without a single comment and, for the first time in my career, the kids asking for photos and autographs. The sound of their disappointment follows me, and it breaks my heart, but I need to get away from here. Away from him.
“Carter Abrams, fleeing the scene!” Will’s voice is taunting as it echoes behind me. Thankfully, we’re out of the public eye, but there are still plenty of people around to witness this. “Why am I not surprised?”
Taking a deep breath, I turn to face him, standing tall, and staring him head on. “What do you want, Jacobson?”
Ever casual, he shrugs. “Just want the chance to catch up with an old friend. Where’s the harm in that?”
I cross my arms over my chest, glaring at him. “We’re not friends and no one thinks we are. Now please, do me a favor, and fuck off.”
I turn, ready to get away from him and leave him in the past for good this time. I can see Bryce weaving through the crowd toward us, still able to get back to where the athletes are with no problem. Several other people are lingering around us, clearly pretending not to listen, but I know they are.
“She’s going to leave.”
I freeze at his words, which are said with a slightly raised voice.
He’s trying to get people’s attention. “When the project is done, she’s going to leave. She’ll move back to Charleston, keep working for Thomas, and will eventually see that I’m the best option for her.”
He doesn’t know; I realize. He doesn’t have a clue about what’s happening in Kat’s life, despite the apparently close relationship he has with Thomas and her mother. Two people I’m not sure I’ll ever meet, but have an opinion of already.
I turn to face him, knowing Bryce is coming to stand by my side. “What are you talking about, man?”
He’s smug—so fucking smug I want to smack the smirk off his stupid face. “Katrina, obviously. What else would I be talking about? I can tell by the way she talked about you that you have a little crush on her, but she’s going to realize I’m what she needs, and she can’t have her career without me.”
“What?” Bryce asks, confusion evident in his voice.
I stop him from saying anything else, taking a step closer to Will with a glare. “I hate to break it to you, Jacobson, but you lost. Again. You lost the best—and only good—thing that will ever happen to you. She’s not going to take you back because you blew it. You refused to see the great thing you had before you and screwed it up. I’d feel sorry for you, but it’s typical behavior for you, isn’t it? So unable to get your head out of your own ass that you lose things.”
With clenched fists and a flushed face, he takes a step toward me. Bryce steps closer, but I do not back down. “You don’t know what you’re talking—”
“But I do,” I cut him off. It’s not my place to tell him what happened with Katrina, but I’ll make damn sure he knows he doesn’t have control over her anymore. “Katrina has nothing left in Charleston; she’s not going back. To you or to that life. Listen to the words I’m saying, Jacobson, you lost.”
He jerks toward me, hands shoving at my shoulders until I stumble back. Everyone around us is suddenly moving. Bryce steps between us, takes the next shove, but stays standing. A couple of the coaches run over, asking whether things are good. My coach is one of them, lingering after we all assure them we’re good. We’re all adults; it shouldn’t come to this.
“Let’s go, Carter.” Bryce grabs the sleeve of my shirt to tug me away. “He’s not worth it.”
Will, who always has to have the last fucking word, laughs. It’s a cruel, humorless sound. “Yeah, Abrams, do what Clark says. We already know who the man is in the relationship.”
I wrench my arm out of Bryce’s grasp, but don’t get back in Will’s face. “What the fuck does that mean?”
If I turn to look at Bryce right now, I know he’ll be tense beside me. I can practically feel the anger radiating off him, but he doesn’t say anything.
“I’m bi, but that doesn’t mean I get with every person with a dick,” I snap. “Bryce and I have never dated. We will never date. He’s straight and not my type.”
“I’m too high maintenance,” Bryce says so casually I know he’s shrugging. “And Carter snores.”
I do not snore, but that’s beside the point.
“Look, I don’t get what your problem with me is besides the fact I’m queer, but this is ridiculous. Let it go, man, you almost ruined my life ten years ago. How is that not enough? It didn’t ruin me then and it won’t ruin me now.”
“Everything came easy to you,” Will shoots back.
“That’s your perspective, man,” I tell him. “I put in the work, every goddamn day. You didn’t make the team, I did. Bryce did. That’s being willing to put in the hard work and the fact you don’t do that is no one’s fault but your own.”
He snorts. “I’m a doctor, Abrams, not chasing a kid’s dream.”
“Then why are you here? Why can’t you let it go? Why did you show up at my business to start shit with two people who don’t care about your shitty opinions?” He opens his mouth to say something stupid, but I don’t let him. “The choices you’ve made in your life are your own. You’re mad at me because I’m the way I am, and you think I deserve less, but I got more. I’m sorry you feel that way, but don’t you dare tell me I got it handed to me. You walked away.”
“Okay, Abrams,” Coach calls, clearly worried it’s getting heated. My voice is rising, and people are watching. “Wrap it up.”
He’s not telling me to walk away. He’s telling me to get my points across and let it go. I’ll take it.
“You walk away when things aren’t handed to you because you don’t want to put in the work. Don’t pretend. You retired when you didn’t make the team. You kissed ass to the one doctor who could elevate your career and then you started dating her daughter. For two years, you destroyed her, and never once put in any effort. Your choices have led to the life you have and if you’re bitter about it, dude, that’s on you. No one else.”
I take a small step back, mainly because I’m afraid he’s about to throw a punch. He’s so red, hands clenched into fists, I think he might explode. Maybe there’s one more thing I can say to him.
“And Kat’s not choosing me over you. She’s choosing herself, and if I get to be part of that, then I consider myself damn lucky. You lost because you didn’t want to work for it. Never forget that.”
I turn to Bryce, pushing his shoulder. “Let’s go. I’m done here.”
Bryce follows me as we walk away from Will, hopefully for the last time. Bryce waits until we’re an appropriate distance before bending over his knees to laugh hysterically.
“Holy shit, dude!” Amazement glimmers in his eyes, but he can’t stop laughing. “Where the fuck did that come from?”
“A long time coming.” I shrug, reaching down for my stuff. “And I do not snore.”
“Whatever you say.” He cackles, following me out to the stands to watch the rest of the meet with the girls. “But I get to tell everyone about what happened.”
“Whatever you want, Bryce,” I say with a chuckle. When we walk toward the stands, I can see Will arguing with my coach and a couple of officials. It looks like they’re trying to kick him out. Apparently, the status of this being his home pool isn’t nearly enough to make up for what just happened.
Which is fine because I’m not sure I’ll be asked to come back to this pool either.
“I don’t want to talk about it, Kat,” I warn. She shuts the door behind us as I tug my sweatshirt over my head. I’m a ball of anxious energy, adrenaline pumping through me. The last thing I want to do is talk about the run-in I had with my girlfriend’s ex. Who also happened to try to ruin my life. “Please leave it alone for now.”
“I’m not going to make you talk about it,” she promises.
In a couple of short steps, she closes the distance between us, her hand reaching up to cup the back of my neck. After a few shaky breaths, I’m able to meet her gaze. Her eyes search my face, worry evident in them, but she doesn’t push.
“I want to make sure you’re okay, that’s all,” she whispers, her voice low, and her breath fanning across my face.
I want to assure her I’m okay. That I’m here and I’m not going anywhere. That I will not shut her out or pretend what happened didn’t take a lot of energy out of me. I refuse to pretend around her. Open, honest communication is the goal I’m striving for, even if I can’t produce it in words.
I hum, hoping she’ll take it as confirmation I’m okay, before lowering my head so I can capture her lips in a light, lingering kiss.
She lets me get away with it for a few glorious moments. Lips gliding together, hands pulling each other closer, but all too soon, it’s over. She’s back to staring up at me with a slight frown, but her cheeks are flushed and her breathing just slightly erratic.
She places a hand on my chest, firmly keeping the distance between us when I try to pull her in again.
“Kat,” I whine, not even caring how ridiculously desperate I sound.
“You’re avoiding the question, Carter,” she scolds, but she’s giving me a playful look.
“I’m not avoiding the question.” I grip her hips in my hands, stepping backward until I feel the bed at the back of my knees. I drop down onto it, pulling her between my legs. I lean my head back until I can gaze up at her. “I’m choosing to answer it with actions instead of words.”
She rolls her eyes, but still her fingers find my hair to comb through it. I let out a groan as her short nails scratch against my scalp, my head dropping forward to rest against her chest. Any other time, I could just stay in this moment for hours, being close to her, and slowly relaxing, but it’s not enough right now. Right now, I want her in whatever way she’s willing to give me.
Lifting my head, I crane my neck to look at her, but she’s already leaning down for a kiss. This one is deeper than the previous ones. One hand tangles in her loose blonde waves, the other draws her in closer until she’s straddling my lap, her thighs on either side of mine. I can’t help but groan as she settles in my lap.
She sighs against my lips, briefly parting just to change the angle before she dives back in. I let her take control this time, following where she leads. My hand moves to the small of her back, fingers dipping beneath the hem of her shirt, which is a loose-fitting coral top that highlights her tan and brings her eyes to life. She had my attention from the moment I spotted her in the stands today. When the tips of my fingers ghost along her spine, she shivers in my lap. Fighting back a grin, as I’d rather not end the kiss, I trace the pattern once more.
“Carter.” She squirms, laughing softly as she catches her breath. Her lips are still brushing against mine. “Stop it!”
“Why?” I tease, tracing her spine one more time. It has her arching against me in an enticing way. “Are you ticklish?”
“Yes!” She squirms against me and, this time, I relent.
Flattening my hand against the small of her back, I use the hand in her hair to pull her back down for a kiss. Instantly, her mouth opens, granting me entrance to deepen it further. Everything moves syrupy slow from there. We stay in that position for God only knows how long, just making out before I pull her in closer and move us until she’s laying beneath me, more fully on the bed.
She blinks up at me, eyes hazy, and a little breathless. “That was very smooth.”
Chuckling, I capture her bottom lip between mine for just a moment. “You sound surprised.”
“Not surprised.” Her leg hooks around my hip and she just as fluidly flips us, settling against me. Now it’s my turn to stare up at her, stunned, her hands flat against my pecs. “But I was rather enjoying being on top.”
Groaning, I push myself up until I can kiss her again, my hands already pushing her T-shirt up. When we part, I pull it off the rest of the way, my fingers dipping down to toy with the front-clasp of her bra. “I rather like you being on top of me too, love.”
Her hips grind down against my rapidly hardening dick, her gasp mingling with a grunt of my own. As we strip one another and ourselves, we only part when we absolutely must. I move my kisses down her neck as my fingers dip into the front of her panties. She tips her head back, letting out a gasp before squirming in my lap in a completely different way.
This woman is going to be the death of me. She’s so responsive to every touch, every breath against her skin, and everything feels so much stronger because I know I’m falling in love with her. I know she’s the one I want by my side as this all comes to an end. She’s the one I want to start the next chapter with, and, hopefully, who I’ll have with me for the rest of this life.
I’m lost in every small feeling as we move together. Every time we do this, it gets better and better, but this might go down as some of the best sex of my life. Even the logistical side of safe, comfortable sex with a partner you care about and trust feels exhilarating in a way I’ve never felt before. When she slowly sinks down on me, I throw my head back and I swear I’m seeing stars.
Her moan echoes through the otherwise still and empty room. Her fingers squeeze against my pecs, and I want this moment to last. Every urge in my body is telling me to roll us over and take control, but it’s not what I want. Not really, I’m fine letting her lead this and as her hips start on a slow grind, those urges are silenced. Hands gripping her hips, I help guide her, but don’t take an ounce of control, allowing myself to be fully at her mercy.
The curtain of her blonde hair falls against the side of my head as she bends down to kiss me. The kiss turns from sweet and languid, to one that’s just as dirty as the grind of her hips. When both our orgasms have ripped through us and we’ve started to come down from the high, she lays down beside me, hand resting against her stomach.
We both stare up at the ceiling, our labored breaths trying to catch up with what we just did, but I feel my body melting against the plush mattress. Turning my head, I take in Kat’s profile and the small, content smile she has on her lips. Unable to resist the gorgeous woman beside me, I roll onto my side and lean over to kiss her.
I love you. It’s on the tip of my tongue, but I don’t let myself say it. I’m worried it’s too soon, and it’s definitely too cliché to say it right after intense sex, but it’s there. I can feel it hanging above us like the sun behind a cloud, just waiting for the barrier to move so we can both bask in the light.
Eventually, we get up to shower and change into clothes more comfortable for sleeping in before we climb back into bed. The meet is over, and tomorrow I’ll head to one last training camp in Colorado Springs while they go back to Columbia. This is the last time we’ll see one another before we’re getting ready to head to Omaha. If there was any moment to tell her, it’d be now.
Still, I can’t bring myself to say the words.
She’s practically asleep in my arms by the time I finally switch off the TV, bathing the hotel room in darkness. Just as I’m about to drift off to sleep myself, she shuffles closer, and kisses the underside of my jaw.
“You okay?” The words are barely a whisper, just wanting to check in on her.
“I’m so good,” she promises, sleep heavy in her voice. Her eyes flutter open to meet mine in the dark. “I love you, Carter.”
Just as I expected, the cloud hanging over us moves and we’re basked in warmth. I know my smile’s big, but hers mirrors it. I brush the lightest of kisses against her lips. “I love you, too. Now get to sleep.”
“M’kay,” she agrees, settling back down against me and almost instantly drifting off.
Still smiling to myself, I quickly followed her lead.