33. Chapter 32 Carter
J une 2024
Rather than flying out to Omaha with the team I train with, I decided to fly out with Kat and everyone else. Unsurprisingly, Bryce has been asked to do some interviews and signings during the meet, so he needs to be there almost as early as I do. Those extra few days will give him and Josie a chance to see her parents, who are stopping off at home for a couple of days before heading down south to do more exploring.
It’s not what my coach would necessarily recommend for me, but he doesn’t really argue either. It’s my last Olympics and I’m nearly thirty; I can make the choice not to travel with a bunch of college kids. Especially since I’m one of the few pros who train with them.
Omaha is just how I remember it, but there’s also something different about it this time around. It’s not just another city I travel to for a meet or another city a friend of mine has lived in. Instead, this place has a small piece of Bryce and Josie that it didn’t have before. No matter how fleeting it is, they built a life here, and it’s one of the few aspects of my best friend’s life I never had a part in.
After getting loaded into the rental car Bryce secured, we start the somewhat familiar drive into the heart of downtown from the airport. It’s changed a bit, but most of it feels eerily the same. Bryce and Josie point out Hunt he didn’t like when I didn’t offer more to an outing than simply existing. He wasn’t a bad guy, and one of the few I saw a forever with at one point, but he fought too hard to understand something he likely never will. Instead of trusting me to handle it, he tried to fix something unfixable.
It wasn’t long after we split up. I’d gained more notoriety after my silver medal in Tokyo, and he wasn’t sure he wanted to be the partner of a professional athlete anymore. I got it then and I get it now. We both were looking for something the other couldn’t provide, so we stayed friends and parted ways. Now he has his almost-husband and I have a good friend, who texts me well wishes, and an amazing girlfriend, who is sitting beside me now.
Kat might not get it. She might not understand the sport, or the way it can consume a person’s life, but she gets someone needing space. She never tries to force me to talk about things I’m not ready to talk about, nor does she try to get me out of my head. She reminds me she’s here for me, a gentle but formidable force at my side. With her there, I feel steadier than I have in years.
“And here it is!” At Josie’s words, my gaze drifts back to the passing scenery. She’s motioning to Riverview Convention Center as Bryce turns the corner to pass by it. This is one place that hasn’t changed. “Our home away from home for the next week. Your ass will be numb by the end of the week.”
Mia laughs, but is nodding in agreement. As we pull up parallel to it, I take in all the decorations adorning the building. Suddenly, I feel a little nauseous as we come to a stop at a red light and I’m staring at a massive photo of myself plastered above one set of doors. I didn’t know it was happening, nor would I have been expecting it, but there it was. The photo was taken during Worlds when I’d won a gold medal in the 400 IM.
“Oh, my god, Carter!” Kat already has her phone out, taking about a hundred pictures.
My cheeks are flushed pink, but I focus on the rest of the decorations. Every year it feels like they take up more room to help hype the meetup. Omaha’s always turned up for US Olympic Trials and the athletes are always grateful for the fantastic meet they put on.
Bryce is making a face as he looks up at the photo. “That’s going to be weird. Do we have to go through that door? I’m going to feel weird walking under Carter.”
“You’re just pissed they never put your pretty face up on a window,” I tease, reaching forward to swat him across the head before the light changes. “All you got was a door back in 2021.”
“You’re right,” he comments, flipping on his turn signal to turn into the hotel. “My face is pretty. Thanks, man.”
Rolling my eyes, I turn back to the window, watching the remainder of the building pass us by before Bryce is pulling into the drive of the hotel so we can all get checked in.
“This is going to be great,” Kat promises, her arms winding around my neck as soon as we get out of the car. “I’m excited to be here with you.”
Placing my hand on the small of her back, I pull her in closer until I kiss the top of her head. “No one else I’d rather have here.”
“Well, I take offense to that,” Mia teases, hoisting her bag over her shoulder. “Come on, lovebirds! I want to take a nap.”
Laughing, Kat and I each grab our carry-ons while the valet and bellhop take care of everything else. For the most part, the Riverview Convention Center is obscured from my view as we walk in, but I can see the corner of the picture. The picture that’s making me realize how many people are paying attention—how many eyes are on me. If I’m named to the team, I’ll be one of the oldest. They’ll look to me as a veteran to show the others the ropes and be there to help with everything that goes into being an Olympian. I’ve been a team captain for an international meet before, but somehow this feels different.
A couple of hours later, we’re all hanging out in the hotel lobby. Most swimmers are arriving tomorrow, but there are still a few people we know who are coaches, media personnel, or even swimmers themselves. After tonight, Kat will room with Mia for the remainder of the meet, giving me plenty of space to ensure I’m well rested and not getting distracted; it was the one thing my coach made me agree to when I told him I’d travel out here alone. Now, she’s standing across the room with Bryce, chatting with one of our old coaches from Arizona, while I sit on one of the couches, lost in thought.
“Hey, buddy!” Josie is grinning as she plops down on the couch beside me. “How are you feeling?”
“Oh, I’m freaking out.” My tone is casual as I wrap my arm around her shoulder, pulling her into my side. “Happy to know you’ll be there cheering me on, though.”
“Of course I am! I wouldn’t miss this, and I’ll be there to do it again in Paris.”
It’s never been difficult for me to understand what made Bryce fall for her—she’s vibrant, open, and the type of person who always makes you feel seen. She’s beautiful, inside, and out, and I’m lucky to have her as a friend.
“You’re going to be there if I make the team?” I haven’t had the chance to talk about it with Bryce, not knowing if they’d be able to get away with everything going on back home. They have the pool, the house, and it’s expensive. Sure, our team is starting to develop with Bryce now utilizing at least one pool, but we’re not rolling in money yet.
“Stop.”
Startled, I glance down to see Josie glaring at me. I frown in confusion.
“Stop whatever is going on in that head of yours. Just stop it.”
Busted. “You and Bryce don’t have to come. That’s all I was going to say.”
“Yes, we do,” she insists. “It won’t just be us, either. Mia and Kat are going to be there, too.”
I knew about Kat, spent many nights trying to convince her she doesn’t have to come, but I didn’t know about the rest of them. “You’re kidding me.”
“Um, no, absolutely not,” she says. “Come on, Carter. Did you really think any of us would miss this?”
Warmth floods me as I glance over to where Bryce stands talking to Kat. He never said anything to me, but I know he’d have given just about anything to have that moment with Josie back in 2021. He knows he’s the reason he didn’t get it, and there’s no dwelling on the past. If anything, I just want to acknowledge that I know how lucky I am, and I don’t want to take it for granted.
“You know, I missed you when you and Bryce broke up, or whatever you call it,” I admit, turning back to her. “It sucked I lost you, too.”
Her smile dims ever so slightly. “I missed you, too. I thought about reaching out but never did because I didn’t think you’d want to be friends with me after everything. I respected you and your friendship with Bryce too much to put it in jeopardy.”
“He was an idiot for letting you go.” I want her to understand how much I mean that. How many times I told Bryce that same thing after the breakup and before, knowing he’d regret it if he lost her. “I told him that so many times. He knew I was right, but I kept telling him losing you would end up being the thing he’d regret the most.”
“I know.” She bumps my shoulder with hers. “He told me. Thanks for having my back.”
“But I should have been a better friend to you—”
She cuts me off. “Don’t do that to yourself, Carter. He needed you more, and I had Mia. I don’t blame you for how any of it went down.”
“He pissed me off, seeing him treat you like that. It wasn’t like him, and I was so angry.”
“And he knows that.” Her gaze drifts to him before looking back at me. “Can I tell you something?”
“Anything.”
“The time apart did us all some good. We lived in this dream world where anything was possible, and nothing could touch us. We all had some growing up to do, reality to see, and we had to do it on our own.”
I look over at my best friend, who’s so at ease with himself and where he is in his life right now, and I know she’s right. He’s the one person who’s been by my side my whole life, constantly proving he’ll always be there. Bryce and everyone else in this room are the family I choose, and I’m pretty damn lucky.
“You two are good now, though, right? Because I don’t—”
“Bryce Clark is the love of my life.” There’s not a flicker of doubt in her features, and I’m fighting the urge to smile. Maybe scream aloud, because my best friend found it. “He’s it for me.”
Bryce found something solid, real, and good. He’s not going to freak out this time. I’ve always wanted him to find happiness—real and true happiness, but I never would have guessed it’d come in the form of a spunky, yet shy, curly-haired blog owner who saw the future impact he’d have on the sport of swimming. Yet here we are, and I got to be part of their story the same way they’re part of mine.
“You know, I think you might have saved him.” My tone is quiet as I lean closer to her. “He hated that job; he hated doing the responsible thing. You were the thing that kept him sane again and helped him see what else is out there.”
Josie smiles back at me. “I think we saved each other. He’s always been the one person who can make me be brave.”
“Nah, Jos.” I wave her off. “You’ve always been brave. He might shine a spotlight on it, but it’s always been there.”
A blush coats her cheeks. “That’s sweet of you to say.”
“It’s true, Josie, and Bryce sees it, too. He’s told me so many times how fearless and strong you are,” I counter. She needs to hear it. “I know you always told me you’re a big Bryce Clark Fan, but I think he’s a bigger Josie Martin fan.”