Chapter 18
BANG! BANG! BANG!
“Urgh, what the hell?” I wake to the sound of someone banging loudly on my front door.
On a quick assessment, I decide I’m hungover as hell - I turn over to check what time it is and a wave of nausea hits me.
Eight-thirty. Jesus. Who the hell bangs on a door like this at eight-thirty on a Sunday morning?
I roll out of bed, fighting back the urge to run to be sick. I have one of Nathan’s t-shirts on – I’m pathetic. I search for my dressing gown, slip it on, and make my way downstairs to more banging, unsure if it’s my head or the door!
I check through the front window, and my stomach lurches. There, outside my door, is Nicki. Oh shit . . . this can’t be good.
I slowly unlock my front door and squint at her as the daylight hurts my retinas.
She eyes me up and down “Seriously, this is what he's been hankering over?”
“What do you want?” I ask, my voice sounds hoarse, and I have no doubt that I look like death.
“We need to talk.” She says seriously.
I shake my head. “We don’t have anything to talk about. If you want to know anything, ask Nathan, and if he won’t tell you tough - it’s over - so it shouldn’t matter.”
“Can I at least come in?”
I sigh, I’d rather do this inside than make a spectacle out of myself in front of the neighbours. I walk off into the kitchen. “I need a drink anyway.” I head to the kitchen and pour myself a glass of juice from the fridge. I don’t offer her any, she won’t be staying long.
I take a gulp of juice and turn to her. She’s sneering at me. “I can't believe this is my competition.”
It's going to be like that, is it? I'm not in the mood for this shit, especially after last night.
“Say what you want to say, Nicki, then leave, although why you have any kind of problem with me at all, I have no idea.”
“You have no idea?” Anger flashes in her eyes. “Well, I’ll tell you why, shall I? All I've heard from my daughter since I got back is Kate this and Kate that, you’d think you were a fucking saint. Then there’s Nathan - I know you were with him last night, bitch.”
I go cold. How the hell does she know about last night? “What are you talking about?”
“You know what I'm talking about. You saw him last night . . . something happened.”
I swallow, trying to keep my cool. “I was out last night and he was there, that was it... It was just a coincidence.”
“Oh, give me a break - I've seen the texts.” Texts? What bloody texts?
“What the he'll are you talking about?”
“You check your phone this morning?”
Oh fuck. I shake my head.
“Well, Nathan sent you some very interesting messages – alright, you might not have answered, but it was pretty clear reading them that something had happened.” She leans in menacingly, “Stay away from my man.”
I wince. “Trust me, Nicki, I don’t intend to go anywhere near your man. He made his decision when he chose you.”
“That’s right, he chose me, and he always will.
Just remember that when you’re playing second best.” She eyes me up and down again and shakes her head – “I mean, look at you, you’re no threat.
” She turns to leave. “If I see any more texts like that, our next meeting will go a whole lot differently.”
“You don’t get to come into my house and threaten me – you can’t keep your man on a leash, that’s your problem, maybe you’re doing something wrong.
As for your daughter, you want to try being an actual mother for once - where exactly have you been the last four years?
No wonder she talks about me, because for once, she actually felt like she had a mother figure in her life.
That’s something you’ll never be – even if she is your flesh and blood. ”
“What did you say?” she says in a whisper, stepping towards me.
I hold my hand up in her face to stop her getting closer “We’re done here, or I’ll be calling Nate - and I'm guessing he has no idea you’re here.” Her face drops. “I didn’t think so.”
I glare at her until she makes a ‘humph’ sound, and she turns and leaves.
When the front door slams shut, I slump against the wall. I run upstairs to check the texts.
2 am Are you awake?
2.05 am Kate, I'm sorry, I miss you.
2.07 amI didn’t mean for that to happen, to hurt you more than I already have.
2.20 amI swear, Kate, nothing has happened between me and Nicki, she’s in the spare bedroom.
3.03 amNight baby, fuck I wish I was lying at the side of you.
No, that’s not good. I can see why she wasn’t too happy. She must have checked his phone this morning.
Nothing has happened between them? Can I believe that?
I'm sure that if he didn’t want anything to happen, she would have orchestrated something in her favour by now.
I like still being the last one he had sex with, but then I have to chastise myself - I need to be getting over him, not permanently obsessing about him.
I bet he is still in bed with no idea that she’s been around here.
I shake my head. I hate the thought of her in that house, going through that front door, lying in bed beside him. A new bout of nausea waves over me, so I take painkillers and go back to bed until I have to get up for Jess.
The thing that hurts the most is that I miss Lucia almost as much as I miss Nathan, and she’s talking about me all the time, which means she misses me too - I hate that she’s hurting and there’s nothing I can do about it.