49. Chapter 49
forty-nine
“Chad!” I pause from unloading sacks of cow cake to call my new store manager, mopping sweat from my neck. “Let Audrey handle the register and give me a hand.”
My back’s killing me. Did something to it fighting that fire Saturday. Or maybe it was when I ended up on the living room floor, where I woke up yesterday morning. Jesus, was I so wasted I passed out and don’t remember it?
Maybe. No knots on the head.
Memory’s fuzzy, though.
I told Tanner when he showed up the next day, don’t bring another bottle of that shit in my house. Not for a while, anyway. Not ’til I get her out of my system and who the fuck knows when that’ll be.
Chad throws himself in, lifting, tossing fifty-pound sacks, working beside me. Should’ve promoted him earlier. Hell of a hand.
“Calder Boone, you’re needed at checkout.” Audrey’s voice comes over the intercom.
My shoulders go tight. “Finish this,” I tell Chad, straightening.
“No problem, boss. Only a few left.”
I head to checkout, dreading what I may find. I’ve been half-expecting Laurel. I haven’t returned her call or texts.
Instead, my shoulders ease, seeing Callie holding Bowie.
“Calder!” he reaches for me.
I take him, sweaty as hell.
“Hey, Bowie. Whatcha doing?” Can’t stop the grin seeing him, no matter what’s happened between his mother and me.
“Shopping. Mommy’s at skull and Pop-Pop’s at work.”
Gotta chuckle. He can’t get the ool in school.
“Whatcha going to buy today?” I ask, his elbow resting comfortably on my shoulder.
He purses his lips and draws his brows tight. “I don’t know. But I have ten dollars!” He shoves his Mason jar at me proudly.
“Wow. Pop-Pop’s been at it again?”
“Yeah.” He giggles.
“What about some garden tools, so you can help your Grammy?”
His eyes shift to Callie, at my side. “I don’t know…”
“Well let’s at least look,” she says, holding out her hands to take him.
He wraps his arms around my neck. “Calder will show me.”
I tuck my hand around him, warm and snug. “Okay, let’s look.”
Carrying him to the toy aisle—where we have all kinds of plastic kid garden tools—I set him down. “Pick what you want. Bucket, rake, hoe.”
His eyes roam the shelves.
“Calder?” Callie looks up at me. “Why don’t you come to dinner?”
Hits me cold and hard.
Off-guard, I blink, shaking my head. “Mrs. Hayes—”
“I’ve told you. Callie. You have no idea how much you mean to us… after all you’ve done.”
“I did it for everyone in that café. I didn’t know y’all were in there ’til I saw Dabbo’s car.”
“That’s just it. We know that. We know you’re the kind of man who walks into fire. Not away from it. Calder she sent Grant home the night of the fire.”
Takes my breath.
“I just…” We share an extended stare since I can’t find my fucking tongue. “I don’t know.”
She nods slowly, letting out a long sigh. “Well. We consider you family now. And this little boy loves you.”
“I love him, too.” Comes out rougher than I want.
“I need tee-tee!” Bowie’s clutching himself, his eyes desperate.
“I’ll take you,” Callie says, reaching for him.
“No. Calder.”
Fuck.
“Come on, Buddy. I’ll take you.”
Carrying him into the men’s bathroom, I set him on the floor, and he shoves his pants and pull-ups down as fast as he can to let go—but he’s too short. He looks up at me with pleading eyes.
I lift him, holding him under his arms as he lets go a long stream, and I can’t stop the chuckle. “Boy, Bowie. That’s a big tee-tee.”
He looks over his shoulder, up at me, grinning. “Just like you! I’m gonna be just like you!”
My fucking knees quake, and it’s all I can do to bite back the goddamn tears.
“Mercy’s not coming back,” Tanner says flatly as he cuts up his chicken-fried steak.
I freeze, fork in mid-air. “For sure?”
“I think she took a job in Austin.”
“You think? Have you talked to her?”
He just stares at me. That’s all I get. I don’t push.
Kind of like feeling that a tick’s on the back of your neck—there’s more to this than I know. But I know him. I’ve got to wait until he’s ready.
“You okay?” I ask.
“Why the fuck wouldn’t I be?” He chews.
Been there done that. He’d rather have his tongue cut out than talk about what’s gutting him.
So, I change the subject. “Chad’s doing good.” I shovel a bite of mashed potatoes into my mouth.
You’d think neither one of us has eaten in a week. “Should’ve moved him up before I did.”
Tanner nods. “Heard Darla moved, too.”
“Don’t give a shit as long as she doesn’t come back through our door.”
“Mind if I join you?” A deep voice at my side.
I look up to see Dabbo standing over our table.
I’m trying to untangle my tongue when Tanner says, “Of course not. Have a seat.”
Dabbo takes the chair to my right. “I’ve got a solution to your firetruck problem,” he says, then looks at the server at his side. “I’ll take what they’re eating. To go.”
He looks between us. “I haven’t had a decent meal since I had that damned heart attack. Can’t have anything fried.” He winks. “I figure, one time. What Callie doesn’t know can’t hurt her.”
Something inside locks tight. All the years I hated him. I never really knew him.
“Anyway.” He takes a long drink of the ice water she set in front of him, setting it back down.
“I talked to the bank directors after that rescue. We can’t wait on the damned wind power company.
The fuckers. The town needs that truck. First National will donate it.
It’s in the town’s and our best interest.” He waves his hand.
“And let’s be real. It can be a tax write-off. ”
I’m speechless, staring from him to Tanner. “Damn. Thanks.”
Dabbo lets out a hearty chuckle. “Good thing Bowie’s not here. Callie’s turned him into a little potty police monster.”
We all chuckle.
But something about it’s… hollow.
Jesus, I miss that kid. I miss his mother. And it’s been one day. One fucking day. How the fuck am I going to survive?
“Tanner?” Dabbo looks directly at him. “I hear Mercy moved.”
He nods.
“I know that girl. She’ll be back.”
Tanner shrugs. “She made her choice.”
“Well, son. Not all choices are as clear as they may appear.” Then Dabbo looks at me, straight and hard.
“She never wanted to leave in the first place. Begged me to let her go to Tarleton. I made her go to Rice. That was on me. But this’ll be on you.
My daughter loves you, not that jackass she married.
I’ve seen Bowie with you and him both. Grant didn’t give him the time of day while he was here.
Left without saying goodbye when Laurel finally got it through his head she wasn’t going back.
She and Bowie love you, Calder. Not him. ”
I’ve lost my ability to breathe. And my damned tongue.
We just… stare.
“Here’s your order.” The server holds out a plastic bag for Dabbo.
Taking it, he stands. “Laurel’s fighting for you whether you see it or not. And you—” He points a thick finger at my chest. “You love her, too. It’s all over you. No one’s standing in your way anymore. Not me and not Grant.”
I look down at my plate, my jaw tight.
Dabbo softens, just barely. “Son… you matter. To her. To that boy. To this family.”
I feel like something just squeezed my heart like a goddamn vise.
As he walks away, Tanner whispers, “Well fuck me.”
“Yeah.”
“She does love you, Calder.”
If there was a next time—it’d kill me.