Chapter 52 Evan
EVAN
When I crack my eyes open from the deepest slumber I’ve ever experienced, I soon come to realise I wasn’t sleeping. I was practically in a coma. Every inch of my body feels like it’s been stuck back together with glue.
I’m brittle, frail, broken.
A choked sound falls from my lips as I stare at the wires hanging from my body and connected to the machine beeping beside me. I blink heavily to find myself back at Jaxon’s pack house, in his infirmary.
I don’t remember much after Ryker flung my body around like a ragdoll with the inhuman powers he has, even for a wolf. It’s not right. It’s not fair that someone so vile gets to inherit those kinds of abilities.
My breathing hitches suddenly. Where is Caleb?
The door to the room opens, and I flick my attention towards Gemma, who looks relieved to find that I’m awake.
“Hi, Evan,” she says softly. “How are you feeling?”
“Where’s Caleb?” I croak.
Her expression doesn’t change. “How are you feeling?”
I shake my head, tears swimming in my eyes. “In pain.”
“You went through a lot, but you’re still here. I’ll give you some more painkillers,” she says as she steps around the bed and fiddles with my IV drip.
“Where’s Caleb?” I demand again. My heart thrashes when she doesn’t answer my question. “Is he okay?”
Gemma sucks in a short breath. “I’ll go get Alpha Jaxon.”
Before I can say anything more, she leaves. My ears start to vibrate from the silence of the room, excluding the irritating sound of the machine beeping. Soon, Ava and Jaxon step inside, and I release a soft cry.
“Oh, Evan.” Ava rushes towards me and takes my hand. “I’m so glad you’re awake.”
I sniffle softly as I rest my pounding head back against the bed. “Where’s Caleb?” I whisper shakily.
Ava swallows and glances at Jaxon. “He’s here.”
Relief fills me to know he’s okay. “Where?”
“Are you okay, Evan?” Jaxon asks.
“No,” I croak. “Ryker tried to kill me. What happened? I need to know what happened.”
Ava squeezes my hand gently. “Take a breath,” she says with wobbly lips. “We’ll explain everything.”
I do as she says, desperate to know the truth.
“Ryker knew what Caleb was planning,” Jaxon starts. “We went to his territory, and we killed his men, but Ryker wasn’t there. And when Caleb realised, he abandoned the mission and came straight back home to—”
The door cracks open, and my eyes flick to Caleb as he stands in the doorway. A soft cry escapes my lips at the sight of him. His gaze hardens as he studies my face, and sorrow meets his expression.
Ava blinks at me with a half smile. “We’ll give you two some time alone,” she says. “We’ll be back later.”
I nod, not taking my eyes off Caleb as they step around him. I notice the way Jaxon squeezes his arm on the way out and the sympathy on his face, but something about it doesn’t seem right.
The second the door shuts, Caleb walks towards me, and I stretch a hand out to him. He takes it within a second and presses it to his cheek, kissing my palm as he sits in the chair beside my bed. It’s all it takes for all my emotions inside me to calm down. For my mind to go quiet.
Caleb’s eyes drag over my face before landing on my throat as he curses to himself. He kisses my palm over and over until I’m crying from the sensations of the safety it gives me.
“What’s going on?” I whisper.
He lowers his head and closes his eyes. Panic starts to lace through me at his reaction, and suddenly I’m filled with dread as everything grows cold.
“Caleb, talk to me. You’re scaring me.”
After a few moments, he raises his head, his eyes burning with sadness and hurt. “How are you?” he murmurs.
“I’m okay,” I rasp, but it’s far from the truth.
My lips part at the sight of how devastated and destroyed he looks.
“Caleb—”
“I need you to listen to me,” he starts. “And I mean really listen.”
I flick my eyes between his cautiously as tears blur my vision.
“I’m going with my father.”
My brows pinch together tightly as I stare in disbelief. “What?”
“When I came back to the house, I found you there on the floor, unconscious and bleeding. He knows that you’re my mate.”
I sniffle and shake my head. “W-why would you go with him after what he did?”
Caleb presses his fingers into his eyes and releases a haunting breath. “Because he’ll make me kill you if I don’t.”
Everything starts to spin out of control, my heart thrashing against my ribcage, making the machine I’m wired up to go crazy.
“What are you talking about?”
He snaps his head towards me with tears staining his cheeks. “He forced me to strangle you last night, Evan,” he chokes out. “That bruise on your neck is from me.”
I raise my hand and brush over the tender skin. I don’t even remember.
“I did that to you.”
“What—” I say as my face twitches in deep confusion. “No, you wouldn’t hurt me.”
“I’d never hurt you, but he made me. He made me do it, and it almost fucking killed me to see my hand wrapped around your throat, and the way your face turned purple,” he says through gritted teeth and endless tears.
I can’t stop my own eyes from leaking.
“And the only way to make sure you stay safe is to go with him. He said he wouldn’t hurt you again if I did,” he whispers painfully.
“No,” I whimper as my heart shatters into a million pieces. “No. No. Please.”
Caleb leans back and tilts his head up to the ceiling. “Fuck.”
“We’ll—” I think for a moment through my hazy head. “Uh, we’ll leave. Go somewhere else. Run and hide and—”
“No, pups.” He shakes his head.
“Caleb, please.”
“He will find us, and he will make me do terrible things to you.”
“B-but he might not,” I sob in despair.
“He will,” he states heavily. “Everything he did to you last night, it’ll be a thousand times worse.”
The cry that tears through me hurts more than any of the injuries I endured. “We can fight back,” I gasp. “We can do something. Anything.”
“I’ve run out of time,” he croaks. “And even if we did, as soon as he knew we were planning something, he’d come for you, and I’m not letting that happen. I’m not risking your life.”
“I can’t be without you,” I whine.
Caleb nods as he scoots closer and cradles my face in his hands. “You can, and you have to. I’m doing it to protect you. My father will not let this rest.”
“But I love you,” I cry desperately. “I love you, and you’re leaving me.”
The words I’ve been dying to say for months in circumstances I wish were different, not like this. But he has to know how I really feel.
He presses his forehead against mine and releases a long, trembling breath. “Ah, fuck,” he says hoarsely, as if he’s about to break down. “I love you so much, Evan, but you have to let me go.”
My heart feels like it’s being stabbed a million times over.
“No, please. I can’t.”
“I’ll find my way back to you one day,” he whispers as he strokes my cheek tenderly and brushes away my tears. “I promise you I will. But I need to go before I lose you for good.”
Another sob bursts from my lungs. “Don’t do this.”
“Don’t come looking for me,” he says before kissing my cheek. “Don’t risk anything for me, okay?”
“How can you ask me to do that? Don’t you hear me? I said I love you, and you want me to do nothing! Please, Caleb. Don’t do this.”
Caleb’s eyes tilt to mine with deep-rooted agony that tells me this is destroying him the same way. “I love you. That’s why I have to do this. Because I’d never forgive myself if something happens to you. You need to understand that. I’m sorry.”
“No,” I rasp. “No.”
“One day, I’ll come back,” he mumbles beneath his thick tears. “I’ll come back, no matter what it takes. I just need him to get off our backs first.”
I close my eyes so tightly that it’s painful.
“And I’m sorry for what I’m about to do. I have no choice. He’ll check, I know he will.”
“Wh-what do you mean?” I blurt as I open my eyes.
Caleb hesitates for a moment, green eyes dull and regretful.
“I, Caleb Vella—”
Realisation washes over me as I cry harder.
“No, please don’t do this.”
“Reject you,” he carries on.
“Caleb, please. Don’t. Don’t do this.”
“Evan Wolfe, as my mate.”
The world stops.
Everything inside me falls apart. And once again, I’m filled with misery and numbness.
My heart squeezes so intensely it could splatter against my ribcage.
I scream out with suffering as the bond between us explodes into fragments.
There isn’t any room for breath. I’m choking as he drops his hands from my face and stands up on unstable legs.
“I’m sorry,” his voice cracks. “I never wanted to do this, but I have to. You’re gonna be okay, Evan. I promise. Don’t look for me. Just live, okay? Live for me, and I’ll be thinking about you every single day.”
Nothing comes out of my mouth as my throat burns dry.
“You’ve brought me so much happiness,” he cries as he grips the fabric of his T-shirt that rests over his heart. “And one day, we’ll have a lifetime more. Look after yourself, take your medication, and talk to Gemma or Nathan. Just fucking live. Don’t let it go to waste.”
I’m shaking my head over and over as he removes his necklace and slides it over my head slowly. “A part of me will always be with you,” he whispers as he rests his hand over the necklace and my beating heart. “And I’m coming back.”
He places a quivering kiss on the top of my head, but it doesn’t last long enough. Without another word, he turns to leave, shoulders heavy as tears drip off the edge of his jaw.
“No,” I yell out to him. “Caleb, please. Please.”
I rip the IV from my hand with the last ounce of strength I have as he reaches the door, but doesn’t look back at me. Blood drips down to my fingers as I throw off the covers with a groan.
The second the door swings shut, I fall onto the infirmary floor, trying to crawl my way back to him with my body broken and my heart obliterated.
I scream out his name, over and over, until my voice is hoarse.
But he’s gone.