Chapter 53 Caleb
CALEB
The sound of Evan calling out my name is enough to haunt me for the rest of my life. Reminding me how I wrecked his heart and rejected him when he needed me the most. But I’m running out of time.
There are only six hours left on the clock before my father will be back to collect me and demand that his orders have been met.
I could have stayed there for longer, but it would only have delayed the inevitable. He might have talked me out of it if I watched another tear leave his eye, but now I know there is no choice. To keep him alive, I had to reject him, leave him, break him—and my own heart in the process.
When I leave the infirmary and try to push out the sounds of his desperate pleas to come back, I’m cornered by Jaxon.
“Caleb—”
My fists tighten, and I want nothing more than to send them flying into the wall in frustration.
“Protect him,” I murmur heavily. “Please. Do anything you can to make sure he’s okay.”
“We can do something.”
I clamp my eyes shut and shake my head. “We can’t,” I say as I bite down on my jaw. “There isn’t enough time, and I’m not risking his life.”
“But to go with your father?”
“I have no choice!” I bellow, my voice echoing off the walls. “I’ll figure something out, but Evan needs to stay away. If he tries to leave to find me or plan anything, you have to stop him. My father will tear him to shreds if he thinks he’s coming back.”
Jaxon’s chest heaves, but not nearly as fast as mine.
“And you can’t look for me either,” I state. “If he even gets a whiff of someone trying to save me, then he’ll go straight to Evan to punish me, okay? You need to keep him safe.”
He stares at me for a long moment before nodding. “Okay.”
“I’m not giving up,” I say as I swallow. “But I have to do this. I’ll be back. I know it. Keep an eye on him. I don’t want anyone else dying for me. I have to be the one to take him out.”
“I hear you, Caleb,” he says solemnly. “I’d do anything for Ava.”
My nose tingles as I wrinkle it. “We’d do anything for those we love, even if it’s painful.”
Before I know it, Jaxon draws me into a tight hug, and I exhale a sharp breath despite feeling crushed inside. My wolf is crying, but so am I.
It’s soul-destroying. To watch his face as I said those words. It’s something that’ll be ingrained in my memory forever.
“We’ll always have your back.”
“I know.”
When I leave Jaxon’s pack to head home and prepare myself for whatever my father has planned, nausea washes over me. I’m disoriented and hollow.
No matter how much I know it’s the right thing to do, it’s not easy to accept. Evan might hate me, he might never forgive me, but I know for a fact I will find him again. He’s my only reason for living at this point. It’s only the beginning; we didn’t have nearly enough time.
The moment I arrive back at my pack house, it’s obvious the dynamic is off. We lost some of our wolves in the attack on Ryker’s pack, but now they all know he was here last night and what happened to Evan.
Felix and Zara greet me, and without saying a word, they bring me into a tight embrace. They take me upstairs to my office for some privacy, where Carson and Aimee are already waiting.
“We’ve been making a plan,” Felix says sharply.
“No.”
“What?”
“I said no.”
“But—”
“We don’t have time, and Ryker will go straight for Evan. He’s already vulnerable, and if I put Jaxon’s pack, or any pack from the district, in a compromising position, then more wolves are going to die because of me, and I can’t live with that.”
Zara shakes her head. “But most of his pack is dead.”
“Who’s to say that he doesn’t have another army? You’re right, we might be able to take him out now he’s lost some men, but I still can’t risk Evan’s life. Okay? I can’t do it.”
“At the expense of your sanity?”
“I don’t have a choice, Zara!” I exclaim. “We all know he’s practically indestructible—with or without a pack. And I’m not dragging anyone else down because of him. He’s my blood, and I am going to deal with it alone. It’s no one else's fight but mine.”
They all stare back at me as the room turns silent.
“I’m the one he wants,” I grit out. “And I’m not letting anyone else die. So I need you to stay put.”
Felix curses and starts to pace. “We can’t just sit here and do nothing, Caleb.”
“You have to.”
“You’re asking for the impossible.”
“I need you to look after the pack,” I say as I approach him and place my hands on his shoulders. “Keep everything in check while I’m gone. I trust you with my life.”
Felix’s jaw clenches. “Then let me save you.”
I shake my head once. “No one can save me.”
I’m the only person who can get myself out of this situation.
“What happened at Jaxon’s?” Zara asks gently.
My chest quivers at the memories. Our matebond is gone. And I’m barely holding on by a thread.
“I rejected Evan.”
They all stare back at me, wide-eyed.
“Fuck. Are you okay?”
“No, Zara,” I confess. “I’m far from okay. I’m fucking broken.”
“I’m so sorry, Caleb,” she whispers as she steps forward to wrap her arms around me.
When she pulls away my head falls into my hands as my body starts to shut down from being drained of all my energy.
“Don’t look for me,” I demand again. “Please.”
Felix’s nostrils flare. “I want to kill him with my bare hands.”
A cold laugh escapes my lips. “Trust me, you’re not the first.”
“What if he hurts you?”
I shrug. “Better it be me than anyone else.”
“Alpha–” Carson steps forward with a cautious expression.
“Whatever you’re going to suggest, save it. I’m not allowing you to put your lives at risk and everything else.”
Carson releases a sigh. “Very well.”
“Someone tipped him off about the attack and that I’m mates with Evan,” I mumble. “I know people have been talking, but we have someone here we can’t trust, and I need you to figure out who.”
Felix points a finger at me. “I’m on it, and I’m going to make them pay.”
“This isn’t the goodbye I wanted,” I rasp.
Zara shakes her head. “This isn’t a goodbye,” she says. “You’re coming back. I know you will.”
A sad smile graces my lips. “Yeah, I will.”
“For Evan.”
My eyes ache at her words. “For Evan. For you guys. For our pack.”
“Make him suffer,” Felix says darkly. “Don’t let him go out easily.”
“Oh, believe me, I’ll make him beg me to kill him. I’m not giving up, regardless of his powers. I’ll find a way.”
They both nod at me, but there is apprehension behind their eyes.
“We’ve got your back, brother,” Felix says before slapping a hand onto my shoulder. “I’ll see you soon. Like Zara said, this isn’t a goodbye.”
He pulls me into another hug, and I tell myself those words, over and over.
No goodbyes because I’m determined to come back and seek justice for everyone who has suffered at the hands of my father.