Chapter 2
Atlee
“I’m going to need a better definition of what you think dating looks like since we’re clearly living in completely different worlds, and which fucking neighbor tattled on me that I’m single?
” The strange man actually glared toward the front of the house.
“It was probably fucking Betty and that goddamned microphone.”
As Casimir mumbled something about her cheating, I rolled my eyes. “You told me last month that you’d stopped dating the…guy you’d been seeing. With his bail being revoked, you said you weren’t going to wait for him, and you also haven’t been going out lately.”
And yes, Betty had dropped a few hints about that but only because she’d been trying to decide if Casimir might want to date her second cousin’s great nephew or someone like that. Her family tree was more confusing than mine, so I’d tuned her out early in the one-sided conversation.
“Ugh.” Flopping back in his chair, he groaned. “I make such bad decisions.”
Correct, but it seemed like this time it was going to work in my favor.
I wasn’t in danger of going to prison no matter how frustrating my family was. I couldn’t say we wouldn’t end up screaming at each other in the garage, but I didn’t think that was high on the list of possible ways I’d entertain the neighborhood this time.
Casimir seemed like the type to get even, not loud.
“You just haven’t found the right partner.” There was no way I was going to agree with him about the quality of men he’d brought home. “I’m just asking to use your spare time until you’re ready to date seriously again.”
It was an efficient way of managing resources.
Cocking his head, he studied me for a moment. “You are really the strangest man I’ve ever met.”
There didn’t seem to be a polite or even slightly impolite response to that, so I ignored it and just waited. For whatever reason, it got another smile from him. “Alright, first question. Are you actually bi enough to date a man convincingly?”
Before I could do more than roll my eyes, he huffed. “Your jeans are pressed and you’re so uptight you squeak. Under most circumstances I’d never ask about your sexuality because it’s rude, but these are not normal circumstances.”
He had a point, even if I didn’t like it.
“Yes, I am bisexual.” I didn’t care if I didn’t look bi because no one could ever tell me what that meant anyway. “I’ve been told that if there is a scale from very straight to very gay, I’m on the slightly straighter side of the spectrum.”
Casimir’s head cocked the other direction that time. “Who told you that?”
Numerous people.
“Most of the non-straight people I knew in college and several of the first women I dated.” Everyone always had an opinion of what side bi people were closer, which was weird and seemed inappropriate, but I’d long since stopped trying to make people seem reasonable.
Casimir’s eye roll said he might be on my side with that.
“Good fucking grief. Okay, stop letting other people label you. If you like a label or need it then that’s fine.
But only you know how you actually feel.
I’m gay. Period. Women have never done anything for me, even the ones who are nice and aren’t insane. ”
Life would’ve been a lot easier if that was the case for me.
“I’m not really worried about labels but people like them. It makes them more comfortable in relationships and social situations.” That was the only thing I was concerned with. “I just wanted to explain that I have no problem dating a man. I just haven’t done it in a while.”
Because unlike my ex, I didn’t cheat.
“Alright.” He still looked skeptical but he didn’t make me wait long to hear what he was thinking. Standing up, he opened his arms. “One test. Give me a hug.”
He wasn’t going to be the bossiest person I’d ever dated or the most high-maintenance, but he was going to drive me insane in interesting new ways.
Still, it was a simple request…or maybe order…and it was unexpectedly logical, so I didn’t fight with him.
Getting up from the couch, I rolled my eyes but I took two steps closer and wrapped my arms around him. He was lean and more muscular than he’d first appeared but the way the loose fabric of his pants and shirt draped around him made him look like he had more curves than he actually did.
It was on the more feminine side of clothing but he wore a lot of clothing like that. I wasn’t sure if it was a personality choice or just because the fabric was softer than most men’s clothing, but it made feeling his body easier even if I kept the hug appropriate. “Well?”
He frowned, shifting his hands on my shoulders and clearly unimpressed. “Like you mean it. I’m going to look like a real date or we’re not doing this. I have no desire to look like I’ve tortured the straight guy into submission.”
I’d underestimated how difficult he was going to be…but he hadn’t told me no.
So…
Like I meant it…
Not like he’d tortured a straight guy.
He wanted it to look like we were comfortable with each other and not like he was chasing a straight guy. I’d never been in that kind of situation but it would have to be frustrating. He probably also needed to be desired on some level.
No one wanted to feel like a burden.
I could make him more comfortable.
Raising one eyebrow, he made it clear he didn’t like waiting. It was a challenge I couldn’t quite ignore, even if the way he ordered me around was confusing.
“Do you have any boundaries I need to be aware of?” It’d been a while since I’d dated guys but everything I’d heard lately said limits were something I’d need to be more conscious of. “I want to make sure I don’t take things too far in trying to prove my point.”
That had his wicked grin peeking out again, but he shook his head. “I don’t think so, but just to be on the safe side, clothes stay on.”
I could make that work.
“I’ll remember that limit even though it might be difficult.” My dry retort had him smirking at me. It was sexier than I’d expected, but I pushed that thought to the back of my mind.
“I know you can do it.” His tone was just as dry and made it clear how much he doubted my abilities. But while I was out of practice for a variety of reasons, it wasn’t hard to imagine holding him more intimately.
“Thank you for the vote of confidence.” Tightening my arms, I brought the front of his body flush with mine and slid one hand lower to cup his ass.
The thin, draping fabric made it easy to feel every muscle and curve, but I did my best not to go too far. There had to be another limit besides leaving his clothes on, and I wasn’t eager to be screamed at because I hadn’t read his mind.
I seemed to have gotten it right, though, because Casimir nearly purred, snuggling against me as his gaze went warmer. “Much better.”
Telling myself that felt good simply because I liked doing everything well, I massaged the cheek I was still holding and stroked my other hand up to play with the hair at the back of his neck. “What would I do next if I had an audience to impress?”
His smirk came back as I barely rocked him against me. “You’d have to kiss me, of course. They’d need to see that to believe we were an item.”
He just had to keep pushing…but I wasn’t one to back down, even from bad decisions.
“I can be very believable.” Instead of doing what he probably expected and going for his lips, I leaned down and kissed the base of his neck, right above the silky shirt. “I like being thorough.”
And once upon a time I’d enjoyed pleasing my partner, but it’d been a long time since I felt any desire to do it.
Casimir was different, though.
And wasn’t that the best understatement ever.
Oh.
He moaned.
My tongue against his neck earned me the sexy sound and a kiss right under his ear got a shiver, but shifting to work my way along his jaw got a frustrated huff out of him that made me want to smile. “Rushing just isn’t believable and I want to prove I can do it.”
If it ruffled his feathers a bit, that would be a bonus…
and his feathers were good and fluffy by the time I got to his lips.
The part of me that wasn’t very bright when it came to decisions related to my personal life wondered what he’d do if I made him crazy.
However, I was smart enough at the moment to keep that inappropriate curiosity in check as I finally gave him a soft kiss and a gentle nibble before I straightened.
I didn’t release him yet, though. I simply raised one eyebrow, mirroring his earlier expression, and kept a neutral look as he glared at me again. “How did I do?”
“If you’re not careful, all that sass is going to get you in trouble.” His fiery expression was distracting enough I almost forgot to wonder what he meant. “It’s believable.”
I hoped so because I was fairly certain we were both harder than I was going to draw attention to…mostly because I wasn’t sure what the rules would be around getting turned on by my fake date.
Well, possibly fake or maybe just practical date.
“I’m glad.” That seemed to mean I should let him go, but that was more difficult than I wanted to admit. Eventually I relaxed my hold and stepped back without looking ridiculous, but sitting back down on the couch without him felt wrong. “What other issues do you see us running into?”
He rolled his eyes. “One of us finding our common sense.”
“Mine left the building when my mother started demanding that I plan a second wedding with my ex.” As he stopped and blinked at me, I shrugged. “We need to restart things with good memories…which seems to need a budget of about fifty-thousand.”
“Lord.” Casimir threw up his hands as he collapsed back into his chair in a dramatic heap. “Ten grand would get you a suite on a cruise ship and the captain marrying you. That’d be a much better story. Hell, you could probably elope to an Italian castle for a fraction of the price.”
He was odd…but those were much better suggestions than a sit-down formal dinner with people I really didn’t like.
“Please feel free to tell those options to anyone who asks you if we’re serious or not.” His laugh had me finally smiling. “Most of my family gets incredibly seasick so that would make it even better.”
Shaking his head, he sighed as he smiled and sat straighter in the chair. “You’re making it very hard to tell you no. This plan is ridiculous and we both know it.”
It really was.
“Think of all the stories you’ll have.” I might not know Casimir very well, but I was beginning to discover his weaknesses. “We might start with a few dates out in public but eventually one of my relatives is going to track you down.”
He was strange enough that he took it as a game and clapped instead of taking it like the warning it should’ve been. “That’s going to be so much fun.”
He was frightening.
“How nice do I have to be to them and how appropriate do I have to be?” Looking down at himself, he frowned. “Are they going to believe you’re dating someone on the more fabulous side of gay?”
That was what we were calling it now?
“I can tone it down. I do it for work all the time, so it’s not going to send me on an emotional roller coaster to be boring for a few dates.” He glanced back up at me. “How boring are the men you usually date?”
That was an interesting way to frame the question.
“I’ve never brought a man home.” When Casimir immediately opened his mouth, I cut him off with one hand. “Only because I’ve never dated a man that I was serious about. The closest I came was in college, but we broke up right before I was going to ask him to come home with me.”
Looking back, he wouldn’t have been able to handle my family but we didn’t have to live through that train wreck because he’d decided to go explore himself.
Leaning back in his chair, Casimir nodded slowly. “Okay, I can understand that. Your family is the type to see a formal introduction as something significant.”
“Exactly.” Especially when I was younger. “I’m not sure how they’ll behave, so I’m not going to curtail your behavior.”
The way he blinked said Casimir hadn’t been expecting that response. “Really?”
For a single moment I felt bad about letting him loose on my family, then I remembered the email my mother sent me earlier.
An updated list of who to invite to the second wedding…which was somehow longer than the first.
There was no way fifty would cover what she was planning.
“I’m fairly certain being polite and level-headed has been what’s gotten me into this situation.” More drama from me might’ve led to less ridiculousness in the long run. “I’m done with being seen as the calm, rational one who makes the logical choices.”
Instead of being offended, he smiled. “I’m your newest bad decision, huh?”
He was underestimating how well-behaved I’d been when I was younger. It wasn’t something I bragged about at this point in my life, but I wasn’t going to hide it from him. Shrugging, I tried to sound nonchalant. “I’m pretty sure you’re going to be my only bad decision.”
I liked structure and rules and logic, and bad decisions generally didn’t have any of those.
My interesting new friend blinked a few times then sat forward and smiled. “You say the most tempting things.”
He really was odd.
I couldn’t say that, though, so I gave him a curious expression and waited. Silence was definitely safer until I figured out what made him insane and what kind of response would sound like teasing.
“Fine.” Throwing up his arms again, he fell back in his chair. “I’ll do it.”
Relaxed relief should’ve been the emotion I felt at having my plan come together, but for some reason, fear and a sprinkling of what-the-fuck were the strongest feelings running through me.
Casimir smiled like the Cheshire Cat. “This is going to be fun.”
Yes, fear had been the right emotion…clearly I was smarter than I’d thought.