Chapter 29
Casimir
“Did you see how they lit the backdrop at the end? I still can’t believe you got such good tickets.” Atlee sounded like a total theater nerd as he gushed about the play, finally sighing out another round of praise about the seats and a variety of technical things I couldn’t track at all.
He was adorable, but my favorite part was the way he scooped the cherry off his sundae and popped it into his mouth. For a man who loved the theater and getting dressed up, he’d gone wide-eyed over getting ice cream for dessert.
“I know people.” I shrugged as he chuckled, but I was telling the truth. “And I thought of you when I saw an ad for it.”
Atlee’s beaming smile gave him that cute puppy look he loved to deny he gave off. “Really?”
“Yeah.” Of course. “It came up online and then I saw some posters for it at that weird coffee shop near my work.”
Just thinking about them made me frustrated. “Hippies with no sense of time should not run a business like a coffee shop, no matter how good their coffee is.”
Nodding sagely, he was trying to keep a straight face but he was doing terrible at it. “Thankfully they’re not close enough to my office that I don’t have to deal with them.”
Have to…
He didn’t have to deal with them.
I leaned back in my chair and raised one eyebrow. “How often do you go just to watch the chaos?”
Ha.
A blush crept over his face as he squirmed in his seat and found the last couple of bites of his banana split monstrosity fascinating. “Um, lately I’ve taken a few long lunches to run some errands and I might’ve ended up near there.”
Laughing, I shook my head. “I knew it. You love their insanity, don’t you?”
He still looked sheepish, but with it out in the open he nodded and gave me a wide-eyed look that was fascinating. “Just in the past couple of weeks. You mentioned it on one of our first dates and I was curious.”
The pink crept back over his cheeks, but he spilled his thoughts as he wiggled. “There are so many…people…well…I don’t know how to describe them but it’s fascinating.”
Weird people.
There were so many weird people.
“They’re weird.” It seemed like I had to give him permission to use that label. “I’m good with all kinds of BDSM, even in some public situations, but that old guy who chases people around with the wooden spoon is just too much and that lady with the pup…”
That was way too much.
Atlee looked like he wanted to giggle but swallowed it back as a bashful expression creeped over his face. “I…I might’ve made it clear that I was taken and couldn’t be…couldn’t be threatened with the spoon.”
His gaze dropped down to the table again but he managed to keep going. “Several of those older women who all seemed to be married to the man with the spoon tried to ask questions but I mostly stuck with I’m taken and my Dom doesn’t share like that.”
Lord.
“You’re right. You’re very taken and I don’t share.” My slightly dramatic tone got a smile from him and seemed to give the confidence to peek up again. “I might show you off a bit in the right situation but that coffee shop will never be the right situation.”
There were others we could go visit on a Saturday, though.
He must’ve seen something on my face because he shifted in his seat and managed to take another bite. “What kind of place would be right to be…shown off? Just a bit.”
My curious boy.
“Well, there’s one thing I have to do before we go out anywhere like that.
” I paused long enough to get another wiggle from him before ignoring it completely.
“But after we clear that point up, there’s a coffee shop about an hour from here that’s got nearly as much color and drama but it’s well run and no one will chase you with a spoon. ”
Some people needed a reminder about limits and public boundaries.
Atlee blinked for a moment but finally cleared his head and got back into the conversation. “Um, I think I might be interested in social situations with more interesting individuals than I’m usually around, but I’d like it to feel less like a circus.”
It was an accurate description but I rolled my eyes. “At least a real circus would open and close on a regular schedule.”
His frown was adorable and made him look like a confused puppy. “The last time I was in there they closed before I’d even gotten my coffee. It wasn’t even two o’clock in the afternoon.”
Atlee’s adorable confusion had me trying not to smile. “They took my order…got distracted…then everyone was told to leave because they were done for the day.”
I shrugged. “Yep. I’ve seen it happen a few times. I try to support local business, especially ones where I know the owners are in the lifestyle, but they’re insane.”
And not in a good way.
Face still scrunched up, Atlee sighed. “I think I’m at the point where I’d like a more well-run establishment to…get exposure to the community.”
I loved the way he described things.
“That’s a reasonable goal.” And it was one we could gradually stretch over time. “I think that other coffee shop I told you about would be a good place to start. They’re colorful and interesting but not in the same way.”
Atlee chuckled. “No being chased?”
I barked out a laugh that had a few people glancing toward us. “Oh, there might be some chasing but it’s generally the owner chasing after his Daddy to get attention.”
That had Atlee going still and blinking a few times. “I don’t think I’ve met anyone like that.”
I didn’t think he had.
“Most of the time you wouldn’t notice. He’s so feisty you’d think he was a Dom but he and the locals around the area are very open.
They’ll respect our boundaries, though, and even at our most boring we won’t stand out.
” People came from far and wide to see the insanity, so we’d just be another set of nosy tourists.
“Then once you’ve gotten used to that kind of casual openness, we can go somewhere a bit more private and slowly inch toward finding where your limits are.” It might take us a while to figure them out but research could be fun.
“You’ve…you’ve mentioned different options.” Atlee looked like he was doing his best to sit still but he was definitely getting wiggly as the conversation went on. “I’ve been thinking about it and I don’t think inching is the way we need to approach the situation.”
Oh.
Interesting.
Before I could decide how to tease him, his voice came out in a rushed whisper. “Not that I’m telling you how to manage that side of things.”
Worrywart.
“I know, baby.” Had that been something he was stressed about? “You can always come to me with fantasies, ideas, or questions. Always. If there’s a topic you want to explore or somewhere you want to go, we’ll talk about it and figure out how to make that work within our limits.”
That time when he went still it felt more thoughtful than fearful, and I knew I was right when he let out a long breath and nodded. “We come to a compromise based on our limits, but we’ve already found so far that your outer limits are a lot wider than mine currently.”
He was going to need a few more reminders about that.
“Because this is new to you and you’re still figuring out what parts you like.” That was perfectly normal. “It’d be weird if you already knew everything you wanted and you didn’t want to explore anything.”
I’d met people who liked that kind of box around them, but I couldn’t relate to it.
“It doesn’t matter if it’s a new hobby or a new job, everyone starts at the beginning.” Sitting straighter, something shifted perspectives in his sexy brain. “You’ve made sure I have good information to help with research and I’m feeling more confident about it.”
We were tucked far enough back in the restaurant that as long as we were quiet no one would hear, but I dropped my voice just in case. “Why are you so confident about this? I know that sounds like a ridiculous question but part of me wonders why you haven’t had a big freak-out moment.”
Might as well get that question out while I had dessert at the ready for emotional emergencies.
I wasn’t sure if I’d just fucked things up or not but I loved the way he frowned thoughtfully instead of just reacting. He had to test my patience and my ability to sit quietly, but eventually he came back to life…still frowning and looking adorable.
“Well, I’m going to retain my right to have a freak-out at some point. I think that’s reasonable just in case.” I wasn’t sure about that but it was funny. He was still in his serious headspace, though, so I tried to match his expression as I nodded.
It seemed to hit him right because he relaxed again and settled back in his seat more comfortably as he lost interest in the last of his dessert. “I think I’m going to start with this is the first time in my life that I don’t feel stressed or awkward.”
It was definitely a good place to start.
“I don’t have to keep guessing what will make you happy. I don’t feel like I’m always behind relationship-wise.” He chuckled as he shook his head. “My blood pressure was so much lower in my last physical my doctor wanted to know what my new routine looked like.”
I tried not to laugh but ended up choking and still drawing attention to us. When I could breathe again, I shook my head. “I never thought to help you prep for that kind of question.”
It hadn’t occurred to me that it could have that kind of measurable effect on him.
“He really didn’t like it when I had nothing to say about it.” Atlee’s frustrated huff had me fighting back more laughter. “It seemed to have personally offended him.”
I could understand that.
“Maybe you should’ve said you’ve been meditating? It’s almost the truth.” He certainly spent a lot of time being very still and focusing on one thing…me.
Atlee couldn’t seem to decide if he wanted to laugh or shake his head, so he shifted back to the original question.
“For some people this would’ve been a bigger shock.
I’ve seen that online with some of the personal stories subs have shared.
But pieces just fell into place for me, and let’s face it, on a very practical level you’re good at explaining this. ”
My not-so-humble shrug had his smile peeking out. “You make me feel very normal, which might be why it’s so confusing to watch other people at that coffee shop. They don’t come across as normal in any way.”
Rolling my eyes, I sighed. “They’re not a good example of anything related to being a human. We need to introduce you to more reasonable people in the lifestyle.”
It wouldn’t be hard to find because nearly anyone would look saner compared to Spoon Guy.
Some men never grew up no matter how antique they got.
“It is normal for us. We’re both getting the things we need to be relaxed and steady, a lot of people take a while to see it like that.” Atlee was brilliant in a lot of ways but not when it came to relationships, so I still felt my question had been reasonable.
“If it’d made me feel off-center to begin with or if you’d have come across as more nervous, it might’ve been different.
” He shrugged as he went quiet like he was trying to picture the different path we might’ve taken.
“I liked the very concrete base you started us out with. If it’d been a trampoline, it would’ve made me uncomfortable. ”
Giving him a smirk, I raised my hands to the side. “What can I say? Steady is sexy and sometimes underappreciated.”
“Not by me.” His quiet response went right to my heart and I found myself reaching for his hand. As I squeezed it, he smiled. “Steady is very sexy and truly appreciated.”
“You keep being this sweet and you’re going to test my ability to make good decisions in public.” He just made me want things when he looked at me like that.
“Then let’s go home.” His grin said I looked entirely too eager for it. “I’m ready for your best bad decision.”