Chapter 41
Each minute passed with a glacial slowness Teddy had never experienced before. He leant forward and Sam’s gaze shot towards him.
“Where are you going?” Sam asked, his good arm reaching for Teddy. Sam’s eyes were dull, but whether it was from the painkillers or the pain, Teddy didn’t know.
Teddy scooted his chair closer to the bed, offering his hand to Sam. The little boy grabbed at his fingers, clutching tightly.
“I’m not going anywhere, bud. Just stretching my back.”
“Oh.” Sam sucked his bottom lip into his mouth, his forehead scrunching the same way Jessica’s did when she frowned. “Mummy?”
“She’ll be here soon. Promise.”
Teddy tapped his phone awake. No new messages since Jessica’s last one saying she was half an hour away.
“Excuse me?” said a loud voice from outside. “Sir, you can’t just walk in here.”
“I’m looking for my son.”
Oh. Teddy sat up in his chair.
“Hey, buddy. Can you give me two seconds? I promise I won’t leave the room, okay? But I need to talk to someone. You’ll be able to see me the whole time.”
Sam’s lip wobbled. “I’m scared, Teddy.”
Rob strode into the shared emergency ward where Sam and Teddy had been placed. The older man was in a rumpled suit, and his tie had been pulled loose.
Teddy stood and Sam clutched his hand tighter. “Look who’s here,” Teddy said in what he hoped was a soothing tone.
“Daddy, I broke my arm,” Sam cried, big tears sliding out of the corner of his eyes. He sniffed, and Teddy reached for the tissues next to the bed, but Rob snatched them away, plucking one out and wiping his son’s face.
“I’ve got it from here,” Rob said to Teddy.
No greeting. No thank you. Not that Teddy needed a thank you.
He was happy to do this for Sam. Well, happy wasn’t the right word, but there wasn’t a single thing Teddy wouldn’t do for Sam.
Or Jessica, which was why Teddy nodded and crouched so he was eye-level with Sam.
“I’m going to wait for Mummy outside now that Dad’s here, okay?”
“But I don’t want you to go.”
“Only one adult is allowed to be in here, Sam.” Rob slid his black backpack onto the overbed table.
“We have to follow the rules, mate. Dad’s going to take great care of you.” Teddy offered Rob what he hoped was a friendly smile.
“Unlike someone else,” Rob muttered. His words hit Teddy right in all his soft, vulnerable places, doubling the guilt that was already too much to bear.
“Hello, everyone!” A friendly orderly popped their head through the gap in the curtains. “It’s time for an X-ray. Who’s coming with us?”
Rob lifted his hand as Sam said, “Teddy.”
“Uh …” Teddy froze.
“I’m his father,” Rob said.
“But I want Teddy to come too.” Sam’s voice was rising, a reedy edge smothering the little-kid lisp that still sometimes made an appearance when he was tired.
“Hey, hey, Sammy. I’ll go find Mummy, alright? You’ll see me again soon,” Teddy promised.
“But not today,” Rob said, and Teddy’s head snapped up. “We’re only supposed to have one person in here. Jessica will make two, which I’m sure will be fine because we’re Sam’s parents.”
The unspoken ‘and you’re not’ hung heavily in the air, mixing with the antiseptic and bleachy smell all hospital wards held.
“But he’s my Teddy!” Sam was getting hysterical now, his cheeks reddening, mouth puckered in a permanent cry.
Teddy gritted his teeth together.
“And I’m your dad.”
“Teddy’s my stepdad.”
Shit.
“No, he isn’t,” Rob said. “Tell him, Teddy.”
Teddy scratched the back of his neck. Should he lie? What would Jessica want him to do in this situation? “It’s, uh, complicated.”
“You and Jessica got married?” Good thing they were in a hospital, because if Rob’s eyes bugged out any more, they’d probably burst.
“We did.”
Rob scoffed. “It won’t last.”
Suddenly, Teddy was in danger of needing his own doctor. “Excuse me?”
“I asked around about you, Teddy. I know all about your reputation. Jessica deserves better than you, and so does Sam. Look at what happened to him in your care! You might enjoy playing pretend families, but for how long until you get bored?”
“Shall we all walk to the X-ray room together?” the orderly suggested before dropping their gaze to the floor when Rob shot them a glare.
The ringing of Teddy’s phone interrupted the tense silence in the room.
“There we go,” Rob said. “Teddy’s busy now. Let’s go.”
“That’s not—” but Teddy didn’t get the chance to finish his sentence before Rob cut him off.
“We’re ready to go now, please. Even if Teddy is Sam’s stepfather”—he said the word like it was poisonous—“I’m in charge.”
“Teddy!” Sam wailed, the sound cleaving Teddy’s chest in two.
“Should I push this or will you?” Rob asked the orderly.
“I’ll go find Mummy,” Teddy promised Sam, swallowing the bitter taste in his mouth because Rob was right. He’d really fucked this up. What else would he get wrong? How would his mistakes hurt the people he cared about?
Sam nodded, his chest shuddering with the great, halting breaths that seemed too big for his little body. “Love you, Teddy.”
Teddy squeezed Sam’s hand. “Love you, too, bud.”
The ache in his chest intensified when Sam’s bed disappeared out the door and he was left standing all on his own.
Never had Jessica been so relieved to see Teddy. Standing tall outside the main entrance, his hair pulled up into the tightest bun she’d ever seen it in, hands pushed into the pockets of his grey sweatpants … waiting for her.
“Christ, am I happy to see you, Starshine,” he said as she collapsed into his arms.
“How is he?” she sniffled, leaning even further into Teddy’s strong arms, pressing her face against the Nate James Foundation hoodie he wore.
“He and Rob went to X-ray about twenty minutes ago.”
She dimly registered that Teddy’s answer was for a different question than the one she’d asked, but Jessica shook that thought away, unable to cope with more drama than was already on her plate right now.
“Okay.” She took a deep breath and automatically tilted her head for a kiss.
She loved that he knew she needed comfort right now, nothing else.
Later, when everything had calmed down and her heart rate had returned to normal, she’d make sure he was okay too.
But first, she needed to see her son. “Let’s go find them. ”
Linking her fingers through Teddy’s, Jessica let him guide her through the maze of hallways until they were outside a brightly lit ward with a large cartoon echidna wearing sunglasses on the door.
Teddy slowed as they neared the door. “They’ll be bringing him back to the third bay on the right.”
Jessica almost tripped over her own feet when she realised Teddy wasn’t following her. “Are you not coming in?”
His lips twisted into a sad smile. “I need to tell you something.”
She frowned. “Can’t it wait?”
Teddy slipped his hands into the front pouch of his hoodie. “Rob knows we got married.”
Her mouth dropped open. This was a disaster. Now he’d be able to say that she was a liar as well as a negligent mother. “What? How?”
“I panicked when the ambulance arrived and thought they wouldn’t let me travel with Sam, so I told them that he was my stepson and then when Rob arrived, Sam …”
She squeezed her eyes shut. Shit, shit, shit.
“It just came out. I wasn’t thinking clearly, and Sam was upset, so I was upset.
He never should’ve got hurt in the first place, and then I went and made everything even messier.
I should’ve lied when Rob asked, but then I thought that would just make things worse in the long run because eventually, he’s going to find out that we are married and it would only be more ammunition for him to use in mediation or court.
I can understand if you want me to leave.
I clearly don’t know the first thing about being a parent.
Not that I am Sam’s parent. I didn’t mean to overstep. ”
The poor guy looked so broken; she had to put him out of his misery. “Teddy—”
“I should go, anyway. Better than standing here like a ginormous reminder that I can’t be trusted with your kid and your ex hates me. I just had to see you and hold you and tell you how sorry I am before I left.”
Jessica wrapped her arms around Teddy. Any hesitancy he might’ve felt appeared to fall away as he relaxed against her. She waited until he was looking at her. “It’s okay.”
“It is?”
She shrugged. “It’s not ideal, but it is what it is. We’ll add it to the list of things we need to figure out together later.”
Teddy huffed, his chest rising underneath her cheek. “I can’t believe this happened. I just keep going over everything and thinking about how I could’ve prevented it.”
Jessica stretched up onto her tiptoes and cupped his jaw, pulling him closer to her. “Do you have a time machine? Or eyes in the back of your head?”
“No, but I could’ve …”
“Accidents happen, Teddy. Don’t beat yourself up.”
Teddy’s eyes filled with tears. Oh. This big, strong man. Jessica was so in love with him for so many reasons. But the way he loved her son? It was right at the top of the list. “What if he needs surgery?”
She took a steadying breath and pressed her feet into the linoleum floor. “We don’t know that yet.”
“But what if he does, Jess? I’ll never forgive myself. And Rob—”
“Hopefully, he doesn’t. And don’t worry about Rob. I’ll talk to—”
“Mummy!”
The gurney rolled towards them, Sam propped up against the raised bit of the bed, a new teddy tucked under his good arm.
His injured one was still covered in a temporary splint.
Teddy unwrapped his arms from around Jessica and nudged her forward.
Lord. He was such a good guy. A good friend, brother, partner …
husband. He was going to be a great dad.
She coughed because, woah, one step at a time, girl.