Chapter 26
I follow Caleb onto the back porch and close the door behind me. Lauren and Aubrey aren’t around, and I’m glad for it. Whatever he’s going to tell me can’t be good. He already looked too-serious, and with him pacing on the weathered floorboards out here, he’s clearly antsy with the things on his mind.
“Spit it out,” I request. I hope he doesn’t hear the worry in my voice.
“My publicist just called.” He pauses his pacing and faces me.
“What did that asshole do now?” I’m aware of my friend’s legal team working on bringing Jeremy down. He’s also got his hands busy with trying to punish Lauren’s father. If I were to tell Caleb about what Jeremy’s done to Aubrey, he’d be even more livid. Caleb looks after his own. That has always included me and Claire. Now it extends to Lauren. And Marian. And because of Lauren, Aubrey as well.
“Huh?”
If he spoke with his publicist or lawyer, it has to be an update about Jeremy. Maybe now is the time to speak up about how he ended Aubrey’s career. Since we’re on the topic of that jerk.
“Jeremy,” I say obviously.
“No. Not him. It’s not about him.”
I furrow my brow. “Just tell me, man.”
“I know you don’t follow social media,” he begins.
I don’t. There’s no point. I have a large staff to handle things for the foundation work. And I have a supervising secretary who doubles as a social media manager as needed just so I have a professional presence.
But I know Johanna lives on it.
“Shit.”
He nods, knowing I’ve caught on already.
“What has she done?”
Caleb and Lauren were embroiled in a mess with threats. He had to deal with scandals tied to his name, and he was in the news. Jeremy tried to exploit that and further smear his name. If Johanna is trying to spread crap about me online and ruin my reputation, that’s too much of the same bullshit we’re dealing with.
“What did she say?”
He shakes his head. “It’s not so much what she’s saying. It’s what she’s trying to make happen.” He gets his phone out of his pocket and unlocks it before he swipes, scrolling to whatever damage Johanna is trying to do.
She’s got nothing on me. I won’t try to think I’m squeaky clean. I’ve made mistakes. Everyone has. But I’ve avoided scandals, mostly because I prefer to be quiet. I don’t make a lot of noise because I prefer to listen and observe, not act out. When Caleb and I drank and partied a lot in the previous decade, he was the one who always made the news. Between the two of us, Caleb’s the one in the public’s eye. He was the more outgoing playboy and the media has always been more interested in him and what—or who—he was doing.
I know Johanna can’t be claiming I impregnated her. She can’t accuse me of taking anything from her because I was the one treating her and paying her way. And most importantly, I gave her my loyalty. I was committed and faithful. She was the one who wronged me. I’ll be damned if she tries to play the victim.
She’s not trying anything of the sort, though. I glance at Caleb’s phone and wish I was seeing something fictional. A joke. Even a prank. But it’s neither.
The picture attached is a form that I would have once been happy to turn in to the state of New York. I obtained the document first. I did it the same day I purchased the engagement ring I wanted to give to Johanna when I planned to propose. I’d been so serious about making her my wife that I obtained a marriage license application from the courthouse. I never got to the point of asking her to fill in her name. After the sudden discovery of her infidelity, I dismissed the paper. I must have stashed it in my desk at home to be forgotten about. The ring, I know I got rid of. I promptly returned it to the store, wanting no reminder of the emptiness the little box made me feel when I spotted it.
“What the hell?” I whisper, stunned to see not only the paper again but also with her name filled in. I never showed her the document because she ruined it before I could. She’s found it somehow though, and has filled in her name.
“That’s your handwriting,” Caleb points out.
I choke on air as I struggle to breathe. “Yeah. I know.” I glance up at his shocked expression. “I picked this up after I got the ring. I didn’t want to wait. I wanted to propose that night and show her the form to prove I didn’t want a long engagement.”
“Did you give her the paper?”
I scowl at him. “No. When I saw her in bed with him, I didn’t even get to the step of showing her the damn ring! I never showed her this form.”
“How’d she get it then?”
I stare back at the image. She’s holding the form next to her smiling face as she stands in front of the courthouse. Her other hand is up and showing the tops of her fingers. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen her face, and it peeves me to have to face her now. But just seeing her isn’t as bothersome as the intention behind her very public post that’s captioned About to get a ring and get hitched!
“The hell you are,” I mutter at the phone. She’s not getting my ring or my name. She’s getting nothing from me. Is this why she’s been contacting me so much? Because she found that form I never threw away?
“She must have conned the doorman to let her in or something.” I shake my head. “I changed the locks because she had the key.”
“Wouldn’t they have known to not let her in?” he asks.
“Of course. Unless she bribed one of them. You know how she is.”
He scoffs. “Manipulative? Yeah.” He crosses his arms. “And stooping to trespassing, taking your personal property, and lying.”
He’s really been on a roll with coming after others to be so quick to list those charges.
“It won’t work.” I shake my head, needing the physical gesture to emphasize it to myself. “We both have to be there to sign the license application at the courthouse together. It won’t be notarized.”
“Not to mention it’s way past the date it would be approved even if you were there,” he adds.
It’s a small measure of relief. But it doesn’t last long. She’s blasted this everywhere, tagging my business profile. Everyone will see—
I jerk my face up as my stomach clenches. “Aubrey’s going to see this.”
He holds up his hand. “Not so fast. I showed Lauren as soon as I saw it, before I headed to the big house to find you. She took off for the library, to make sure Aubrey doesn’t check her phone. Reception’s been spotty for her, and Lauren says Aubrey’s been on a self-ban from using social media for a while. She’s not likely to look right now, but still.”
I whoosh out a big breath. I’m on the edge of telling Aubrey I want something lasting with her. I’m so close to getting the courage to lay it all on the line with her and just be honest that I’m falling for her. And now this. This is the last thing I need thrown in her face as she tries to consider me as something more than a just-for-fun hookup.
“I’m pissed, man. I wish you didn’t have to deal with this.”
“But it’s all my fault.”
He snorts. “The hell it is.”
“No. I mean it’s my fault that she’s getting so ballsy to pull a stunt like this. She’s been trying to contact me and I haven’t given her a minute of my time.”
“Yeah. I told you to block her.”
Like blocking her would’ve helped. She still would’ve done this, trying to force me to talk to her. My reluctance to hear her out is biting me in the ass. If I’d just sat down and talked, she would’ve given me a chance to tell her I’d never marry her.
“But you’ve got to talk to her now. You’ve got to tell her to knock it off once and for all, or else.”
Or else I sic my lawyer on her. I nod, hating the tight spot she’s put me in. “I know. I will. I do need to.” This kind of conversation would be best in person. Where she can’t manipulate what I say. Texts are too ambiguous. A phone call wouldn’t show her how I’m expressing my anger. Even a video call feels wrong. I need to speak with her, now, and that means I’ll need to go back to New York immediately. I can’t let this circulate and go untended before it causes more serious damage. I have to address it sooner than later, and that’s going to shift my flight back to the Big Apple to tomorrow instead of next week.
“I need to talk to Aubrey first,” I say aloud. I’m not telling Caleb, just voicing my worries and concerns. I’m grateful Caleb and Lauren are rushing to prevent this news from reaching Aubrey, but I cannot ignore the need to be upfront and honest with her.
“Yeah, you really do.” Caleb frowns at me, sympathetic but firm. “If you’re thinking about getting this serious about her, you cannot let this be a misunderstanding that brews more trouble. You’ve got to come clean about just how bad Johanna wants you back.”
“I’m not going back to her.” I say the words I’ve thought so many times, but speaking them to him feels so definite. Seeing that form pulls back so many memories though. It’s hard to forget the exciting hope I felt at that time. Johanna squashed that hope and optimism for the future, but now that I’m recalling the experience, I miss that feeling of knowing I won’t be alone for the rest of my life.
But not with her. I rub my head as tension gathers there. Not with Johanna. Since meeting Aubrey, I’ve fallen into the dream of her, but with this hiccup, I feel like I’d be an ass to expect her to commit to me when my past is still such turmoil. Aubrey doesn’t deserve this crap either, and I hate that I haven’t just moved on and sealed a stamp of closure on Johanna yet.
“Lauren’s going to tell her to come back for dinner. We’ll make sure you guys can talk,” Caleb says.
It doesn’t escape my notice that Aubrey is already falling under his protection. If I were to hurt Aubrey, that would be indirectly hurting Lauren because the women are such close friends. He’s not telling me what to do. I already know that I have to be honest with her and explain this bullshit.
I need to lay everything out on the table now. It means putting my heart at risk of being hurt, but I have no other choice.
I can’t hide behind the walls anymore. I’ve got to take a chance that Aubrey won’t reject me, that she’ll believe me when I say I think I love her—three words I vowed I’d never tell a woman ever again.