Chapter 43
Chapter Forty-Three
Simon
A baby. Now that was three things in my life that went unplanned.
The first was falling in love. The second was getting married.
Now I was going to be a father. Jesus Christ. I couldn’t believe it.
The second I saw the two lines, there was no disappointment or sudden panic over everything I was about to lose.
Because I wasn’t about to lose anything.
I was going to have a son or daughter. A little person who was half me and half Bella.
I could already picture her pregnant, which was insane since we’d just found out five minutes ago.
Nothing would be quiet in the penthouse anymore once the baby arrived.
The thought made me smile. My father was going to lose his fucking mind, and I couldn’t wait to tell him.
Then something hit me. Becoming a father meant being responsible for a child in a way I’d never been responsible for anyone before. I knew how to run a multi-billion-dollar company. I knew how to negotiate deals and manage thousands of people. I didn’t know the first thing about raising a child.
“What’s wrong?” Bella asked, sitting down on the couch.
“I just realized that I don’t know the first thing about raising a kid. We’re going to be responsible for an entire person.” I ran my hand through my hair.
“I know.”
“A person who will eventually have thoughts and opinions and problems because of the shit we did.”
She let out a laugh.
“Why are you laughing?” I narrowed my eyes.
“Because you sound like you’ve just discovered what parenting is.”
“Now that the shock has somewhat worn off, I got to thinking.”
“Clearly,” she said.
I walked over to the couch and sat beside her. She brought her hand up and ran her fingers through my hair.
“What have you been thinking about?” she asked.
“That we’re going to fuck this kid up.”
She laughed again.
“I’m serious, Bella.”
“Simon, we’ve known I’m pregnant for less than an hour.”
“So? It doesn’t change the fact that we’re probably going to fuck it up somehow.”
“Your confidence as a future father is inspiring.” She rolled her eyes.
“Think about it for a second. We both have issues,” I said.
“Excuse me?” She cocked her head.
“You know we do, sweetheart.”
“I have considerably fewer issues than you,” she said.
“That’s debatable. Especially since you started working for MDG.”
She bopped her head back and forth. “Maybe. What exactly are you afraid we’re going to do to this child?”
“I don’t know yet. That’s the problem.”
“No couple in the world could foresee that,” she said.
“I’d prefer if I could.”
“Of course you would.” She laughed.
“I like being prepared. You know that.”
“You can’t prepare for everything in life, Simon.”
“I hate when you say that.” I frowned.
“Because it’s true, babe.” She smiled.
“I’ll probably be too strict out of fear,” I sighed.
“Definitely.” She replied way too quickly.
“Really?” My brow raised. “You didn’t even think about what I said.”
“Because I’ve met you.” She grinned.
“I’m not that controlling, Bella.”
“You wrote out ten rules I had to follow in order to live in your home for one month.”
“You were a stranger. I couldn’t trust you not to disrupt my life.”
“You gave me a tiny cabinet to keep my food in because I wasn’t allowed in the rest of your cabinets.” She laughed. “And you wouldn’t let me have guests over. Oh God, our child is screwed.”
“Exactly. Now you get what I’m saying?”
“Don’t worry. My parenting skills will balance out yours,” she said.
“Right. Because you’re going to let the kid do whatever the hell it wants.”
“I most certainly will not,” she said.
“Bella, you couldn’t follow ten simple rules for one month.”
“They were stupid rules,” she smirked.
“They were reasonable rules.”
“Whatever. You couldn’t follow your simple rule either.”
“I didn’t have rules,” I said.
“Yes, you did. Don’t fall in love and get caught in the confines of a prison called marriage.”
I stared at her for a moment. She had a good point.
“Fair enough.” I smiled. “I’m just scared I’m going to make mistakes.”
“You will.” She squeezed my hand.
“That’s not comforting me, sweetheart.”
“I will too. We both will. And you know why? Because we’re human, Simon. We’re going to lose our patience sometimes, and we’re going to make the wrong decisions. We’ll probably even argue about what the right decision even is.”
“We already do that without a kid,” I said.
“Exactly. Look at that. We’re already experienced.” She grinned. “But seriously, we’re definitely going to fuck this kid up.”
“Hopefully only a little bit,” I sighed.
Bella placed her hand on her belly, and I placed mine over hers.
“What if it’s a girl?” I asked.
“What about it?”
“I already have a rule set in place. No dating until she’s thirty.”
“Okay.” She laughed. “I can’t wait to see how that goes over. And if it’s a boy?”
“Then we’ll have a different conversation,” I said.
“Oh hell no!” she said. “You are not raising our son with one set of rules and our daughter with another. See. We already found the first way you’re going to fuck up our kid, and we’ve already fixed it.”
“Christ,” I sighed.
“Look at us. Parenting already.” She grinned and laid her head on my chest. “Simon?”
“Yeah?”
“I think the fact that we’re already worried about fucking up our kid has to count for something.”
“We’re going to love this baby like crazy.” I smiled.
“And he or she will know it,” she said.
“Absolutely. Every single day of his or her life.” My arm tightened around her.