CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE
Thelma, the bulldog puppy, growled, wrestled, and attacked Sawyer’s foot as he sorted through the stack of photos that had been kept in the top dresser drawer. In one after the next, he saw what his future had been. Then it was gone. Penny had been his world, and they’d had great plans. Their child had been a promise of what he hoped was the first of more.
Reverently, he returned the photos to the keepsake container and picked up Thelma. Jared had had a lot to say about safe houses. The best ones were rarely the most obvious. They weren’t the ones with the best security systems or weapons stashed around every corner. The best ones were the comfortable ones, the ones that met unanticipated needs and provided a sense of safety beyond simply securing their occupants.
Boss Man wasn’t known for talking in code, and when Sawyer had asked if they were really discussing the philosophical aspects of safe houses, Jared had simply said, “What do you think, dipshit?”
They hadn’t been talking about safe houses. They weren’t even talking about Angela. At one time, Sawyer thought he had it all together. Life had punted that plan to kingdom come. When the pain stopped, he stopped. It wasn’t that he didn’t live or feel. Working for Titan packed enough adrenaline for a dozen lifetimes. But Sawyer hadn’t tried to live again.
Then Angela came along. Everything changed. The transformation hadn’t been abrupt. Hell, until today, he hadn’t noticed how long their situation had been in the making. Now that his eyes were open, he understood that if he didn’t take a leap of faith and love Angela the way she deserved to be loved, his soul would shrivel and wither. He’d return to the shell of a person he’d been after Penny and William died.
Sawyer didn’t know what that leap would look like. But he was done hiding from the risk. Fear wouldn’t determine his future—their future.
Angela approached Sawyer’s bedroom. The closed door offered a layer of privacy that didn’t abound in the cozy house. She appreciated it, but at the same time, as she closed in on the threshold, her heart hammered. All she had to do was find the right words.
Angela knocked on his bedroom door.
“Come on in.”
She twisted the doorknob and crept in. Nervous energy swirled in her stomach.
Sawyer held the puppy to his chest, and Angela wished it was her who held Thelma. The squiggly little pup would keep her heart from jumping as she walked closer. “Hey.”
A wary expression clouded his beautiful face. Something—maybe caution or carefulness—stormed in his blue eyes.
She bit her lip. “That was a weird phone call.”
“Did Jared talk in codes and metaphors?” Sawyer repositioned Thelma in his arms.
“Not really.” She inched closer and wished she could decipher his body language. “Should we compare notes?”
“Did he talk to you about various weapons stashes and the makings of a good safe house?”
Her brow knit. “No.”
Sawyer nodded as though that made perfect sense.
If it did, Angela didn’t get it. She asked, “Did he mention rumors and the trial to you?”
“No.” Thelma squirmed to be let down. Sawyer set her by his feet. She scampered to the bed and grabbed hold of the dangling corner of the bedspread. A little growl and head-shaking attack ensued.
“Don’t,” he scolded her and redirected the pup to a rope toy. After ensuring Thelma wouldn’t chew on the covers again, he returned his focus to Angela. “What rumors?”
She remembered how Jared’s infinite wisdom included relationship advice. Friendship was the basis of so much more. Her heart tripped over itself, but Angela wasn’t ready to explain that to Sawyer, so she changed the subject. “I’m going to let the Marshals tuck me away until the trial.”
His expression flipped. With knitted brows and a scrutiny she wasn’t expecting, he managed a tight, “That’s the right thing to do.”
“Yeah,” she agreed.
His lips pressed together. “You worked out the details?”
She shook her head. His about-face didn’t make sense. Her nerves were already sky-high and tangled. Now, they faltered.
“What’s going on?” he asked.
Angela studied Thelma for an unnerving moment and licked her lips. This was Sawyer. She could tell him anything. Ask him anything. And, sure, they’d set up rules and had their reasons, but Boss Man wouldn’t lead her astray. Sawyer wouldn’t. He was her everything. “Come with me.”
Now his lips parted. His expression changed again as though he didn’t understand and was about to ask where she wanted to go.
Angela prayed she wouldn’t lose this man. “Come with me. As Sawyer. Not as the man who keeps saving my life. But as the man in my bed. Who I—” There was so much to say, and most of it would send him away. She wanted him to know how much she loved and needed him, but she couldn’t. “I know I can’t ask you for more—”
“Wait.” His voice had dropped to a bottom-of-a-barrel rumble. Its vibrations rolled over her skin, and goose bumps spread down her arms and back. Her frenzy of electrical sparks contradicted what he’d said. Cut off, she closed her eyes to whatever he would say in his best, most caring way to let her down.
Sawyer wrapped her into his arms. Her eyes pinched tighter. His lips dipped to her temple, her cheek, and finally, her forehead. She couldn’t help but lean her softness into the rock-hard protection of his hold.
“Look at me, Ange.”
Her reaction to this was something else she couldn’t help. Her head tipped back. If only they could stay like this forever.
“You can ask me anything,” he whispered in a way that made his chest rumble again. “Always.”
“Maybe.” Her voice trembled. She was terrified, and he could see it.
Sawyer cupped her chin and then eased back until he sat on the edge of his bed. He held her between his legs, eye to eye. “You can. And you know why? Because I have been in love with you since… I don’t know. Since I first met you? When we first became friends? Or I first kissed you?” The corners of his lips curled into a sexy, soul-stealing smile. “And I keep falling in love with you. Over and over again. In so many different ways. So you can ask me whatever you need to ask of me.”
Her heart raced. “ Sawyer… ”
“But you have to know this. I will always be the man willing to save your life, Angela.” Sawyer cupped her chin in his hand. His thumb caressed her cheek. “I didn’t think I could have a woman in my life again. When I told you that, I believed it. But I was wrong. I couldn’t share my life with anyone again until I did so with you.”
“ Sawyer .”
“You deserve the world. You deserve to feel safe and loved.”
Tears slipped down her cheeks.
“I want to be the man who gives you everything.” He swiped away a tear. “I love you.”
More tears spilled as her heart exploded. “I love you too.” She wrapped her arms around his neck and buried her face against it. Relief and excitement raced through her veins. She laughed, and Sawyer draped her over his chest as they fell backward onto the bed.
He threaded a hand into her thick hair and pulled her face close. Their lips tangled. He rolled over and caged her to the bed. “You are my everything.”
A flood of tears returned. “Stop making me cry.”
He laughed, shaking his head.
She caught his cheeks between her hands. “You’ll go into Witness Protection with me? It shouldn’t be for very long.”
Gently, he kissed her lips. “I will go anywhere with you. Always.”