Chapter 42
We sat in the tub only a little while, and once I’d fed enough to at least prove I had, I stopped.
Even if it was the hardest thing I’ve had to do in quite some time, I’m proud of my restraint. Her energy is bright and soft—fluffy—unlike Kayn’s, whose is thicker and richer. She tastes like spring, he like winter.
After helping her out and handing her a towel, I stepped out of my bedroom to get her some clothes.
The only person I’d dare ask for that from is my mother, and when she didn’t answer her door, I slipped inside and stole a full-length dress from her closet.
Nothing she owns is modest, but at least this would cover Amarah’s breasts and ass.
When I returned to my room, the bathroom door was open just a crack, and the moment I stepped inside, she peeked her head out.
I offered a smile that she didn’t return and handed her the dress.
She shut the door swiftly, leaving me to sit on my own bed, alone, and feel every second drag like a century while she got dressed.
“Zuhara.” I reach out to my Familiar while I wait. “Is Kayn okay?”
She sighs through the bond—long, theatrical, and full of irritation. With this attitude, I’m denying her any mortal-world treats for a decade. “He is okay,” she finally says. “Quite angry with you. And with me right now.”
“As is his right.”
“How is the girl? He demands to know.”
I wet my lips, lean back on one hand, and rake the other through my hair. “She’s okay. Desperate to see him, but fine. Did he tell you who she is to him?”
“No, but let us be honest with each other—it’s pretty obvious.”
I’m not stupid. I know exactly who she is to him. Kayn has never claimed anyone. At least, that’s what he told me once. He even begged to do it to me, but I told him it wasn’t a good idea. And look at that, turns out I was right.
What are the odds that the man I love is with the woman I haven’t been able to stop thinking about since the moment I laid eyes on her? I can’t tell if fate is an evil cunt for that, or if she’s actually trying to tell me something.
“Lucifer?”
I shoot to my feet at the sound of her voice. “Yes?”
Her head peeks out from between the door and its frame. “Do you have anything else I can wear?”
I let out a low chuckle. “I was going to have you wear a pair of my sweats and a shirt, but I don’t think that would bode well.”
I can’t be rock-hard at dinner, and seeing her in my clothes would guarantee exactly that. Plus, my father wouldn’t appreciate her showing up anything less than presentable.
She sweeps her long white hair over one shoulder, eyes closing briefly. “Do you have anything to go over my shoulders? Maybe a jacket? I may get cold.”
I manage not to laugh. She’s in the Beyond—this part of it doesn’t get cold. If anything, she’ll get a bit warm. “Don’t worry, you’ll be fine. Come on out, let me see.”
She hesitates, scanning the room as if expecting someone else to appear, and then finally steps out.
I’m suddenly very glad I didn’t find anything else for her to change into and equally glad nothing hides a single part of her frame. Yes, I saw her naked, but only in passing. I was too preoccupied with the fear of my father catching Kayn’s scent on her to actually look.
Now I can appreciate her.
Her figure is a damn masterpiece. From the fullness of her bust to the curve of her hips—round, soft and perfect—she’s breathtaking.
The black dress does everything for her, and while I know it’s probably a size too small, I love it even more because of that.
The thin straps rest against the small swoop of her shoulders, and although I noticed before, now I truly take in the twin puncture marks right where a Vampire claimed her.
When I was holding her in the tub, that was where I rested my head.
Right against the marks. The smell of both of them was intoxicating, and if it weren’t for how traumatic her response was when I told her I needed to feed from her, I don’t know if I would’ve had the strength to stop myself from taking her right there.
It’s why I kept my jeans on; I didn’t want any extra temptation.
“What?”
I lift my gaze to hers, and the uncertainty in her eyes makes me clear my throat. “Just appreciating you.”
Her cheeks flush, the red pooling beneath her freckles, and it only enhances her natural beauty.
“Why do you want to change? You’re stunning.”
She crosses the room, one hand wrapped protectively around her waist while the other rubs at the back of her shoulder. “It’s just… a lot of skin showing.”
“We’re in a world built on lust, dollface. You’re practically modest compared to the women we’ll come across.”
Slowly, she wets her lips, drawing her bottom one between her teeth. It’s insane how attracted I am to her. The memory of kissing her—her taste, the sounds she made—I can feel myself drooling over a moment that lasted mere seconds.
“It’s… alright. This is fine. Let’s just get this over with.”
I step beside her and rest my arm across her shoulders. She doesn’t tense or pull away, and my Vigoro hums in satisfaction.
“I’ve got you. I promise nothing is going to happen to you.”
She lets out a sigh. “Lucifer… you may be having a meal with your family, but to me, you’re taking me to dinner with Belial. The ruler of the Beyond. The thirteenth banished from the Vayl. This isn’t a simple ‘promise to keep me safe’ situation.”
I let out a soft chuckle and place my fingers under her chin, tipping her face up to mine. “Trust me.”
Her chest lifts as she draws in a deep breath. “I want to. I do.”
I nod. “Good enough for me.”
Leaving my bedroom, I guide us into the open foyer. Four floors spiral around the main entrance, each level wrapping the double staircase that sweeps upward into the rest of the manor.
The moment we turn toward it, she stops dead.
“Where are we?” she whispers. “That door did not lead to this when we came in.”
“You probably came through the Expressway, which by the way, is something I want clarification on. Not just anyone can land here. How exactly did you end up in my bedroom?”
She slides an arm around my back, fiddling with my black button up shirt. “Luck, I suppose. This place looks like a gothic mansion.”
Guess that’s one way to describe it.
Everything is dark gray or black, with painted murals of creatures from the Beyond.
Dozens of chandeliers, candles, and ornate rugs fill the forty-plus-bedroom home of my father.
Not every room is occupied, but enough are that I’m not surprised when a few maidens pass by with their Blightborns: Mundanes who sold their souls.
“Lucifer,” one of the women says, bowing her head. “His lady.”
Great.
“Carry on.” I pull Amarah closer and guide us toward the stairway.
“His… lady?” she says with a bit of irritation.
“Everyone belongs to my father.” She tenses, and on instinct alone, I tighten my hold on her upper arm. “Don’t worry. You’re mine here.”
I glance down at her as she clears her throat. “Why does your father want me to come eat with you?” Cute deflection, dollface. “I wasn’t even aware you Demons eat.”
“We don’t need to eat,” I say, steering her aside when one of my father’s sentinels barrels up the steps.
“What the fuck is that?” she whisper-shouts.
The golem-like construct halts mid-step and turns its head toward us. Forged of molten glass and brimstone, it snorts a gravelly growl. I wave a dismissive hand, shooing it off.
“A Sentinel. A guard, basically. Don’t worry, they’re harmless.”
For being nearly eight feet tall and made of solid mass, they’re surprisingly useless. Slow as Beyond and good for little more than serving as stepping stones for people who can’t fly.
Once again, I lead us down the curved staircase, guiding us toward a set of double doors that open into a long hallway.
“You never answered my question.”
When I glance down at her, she’s taking everything in. Her eyes flick from one piece of artwork to another, then to the rich red carpet, before the crown-molding that frames the ceiling. The wonder in her expression is… honestly adorable.
“Which one?”
“Why your father wants me to come.”
It isn’t my father who wants that—and bloody Beyond, that thought alone makes my dicks hard. Gods be damned.
“No clue. Could be innocent—maybe he’s shocked I’d bring anyone to the Beyond, let alone into my bed.”
It’s not that I ever intended to be celibate, but it always felt like cheating on Kayn. Even if I ended things by leaving, it still felt wrong. I was ready to let myself wither into hibernation, but because my father needs me, and I love my mother, my Vigoro won’t let it happen.
She grips the fabric of my shirt. “Innocent and Belial should never be in the same sentence.”
I shrug. “True. Poor choice of words, dollface. My apologies.”
When we reach the door, I place my hand on the knob. Just as I’m about to turn it, I pause. I can sense both my parents inside, and they know I’m standing here.
I draw in a breath, lean back slightly, and turn to her with a small smile. Summoning my shadows, I let a few tendrils glide across her face. I don’t speak, and she seems to understand I’m doing it deliberately.
Gently, I sweep her hair behind her shoulders, letting it fall down her back. Then, with careful precision, the shadows slip into one of her ears.
She’s about to gasp when I cover her mouth with one hand, the other settling at her upper back.
“Shh.” I murmur it so quietly it could pass as a draft brushing the door.
Her eyes widen as my shadow settles into the apex of her mind.
“Can you hear me?”
She nods her head slowly.
“Very good. I should’ve done this upstairs, but I was… distracted.”
Her cheeks darken, and that simple reaction makes me suck in a deep, steady breath through my nose.
“You can talk to me through this, like you did when you were having a panic attack earlier.”
It takes her a second to hit the right vibration for my mind to catch it, but when it does, I smile.
“Like this?”
“Just like that. Now—if you doubt anything, speak to me this way, okay?”
“Okay.”
She reaches for my shirt, gripping it tight, and the directness of the gesture surprises me.
“Lucifer, I need you to understand something.”
“Hurry, dollface. They know we’re here.”
She nods quickly. “My life means nothing to me.”
The words hit hard enough that I shake my head immediately.
“Kayn is all that matters. I would die in this room if it meant he got home safe… with you. He deserves that.”
My mouth parts to speak aloud, but she continues before I can form a single word.
“Your father scares me. If he didn’t, I’d be an idiot. And that’s one thing I’m not. But it isn’t because I fear death. It’s because he could take the one thing I’ve come to care about more than my own life and anyone’s I’ve ever met.”
She looks at me, and the sadness in her expression hits me with the same force as the night I left Kayn. That same sickening drop in my gut, that vow-never-to-feel-this-again sensation.
“Protect Kayn above everything, above me, because if anything happens to him… I’d follow him into whatever fate he’s given.”
“He’s safe, Amarah.”
She shakes her head. “You know what I mean.”
And in this moment, I do. Perfectly.
“I’m fully capable of protecting you both.”
Her smile is warm, but the stillness behind it is chilling. “If that were the case… you’d never have left him in the first place.”
She puts her hand over mine and pushes the door open before I can drag this conversation on any longer. Images flash behind my eyes—Kayn on his knees, my father looming over him—and a chill runs through me.
“I did what was right for him,” I slip in as I step through the doorway with her into the large dining hall.
What surprises me is that I can hear emotion in her words through the link. Everyone’s mental voice comes through calm, nearly monotone.
But not hers.
I hear every emotion. Including the pain as she says, “He deserved the truth. What you did wasn’t right for him… and you know it. You took the easy way out. The coward’s way.”