ALICIA
It feels so strange walking into the house together with Ryan. Strange, but amazing. I have everything I ever dreamed of -- a fantastic job, a gorgeous boyfriend, and a baby on the way.
When we step into the kitchen, Jackie looks up at us and grins. “You told him?”
“I told him,” I say, and me and Ryan join my sister at the kitchen table.
Jackie has a smug look on her face.
“Don’t say I told you so,” I tease, and Ryan arches his brow questioningly.
“I’d never dream of it,” Jackie says, rising from the table to put the leftovers in the microwave. “Everyone has been fed, bathed and done their homework, and I’ll get the kids to school tomorrow.”
I stand up and pull my sister into my arms. “Thank you so much for everything. Mom and Dad would be so proud of you.”
Tears glimmer in Jackie’s eyes. “I’m only doing this, so you don’t blame me and my detox tea.”
We both laugh, and then the microwave pings and Jackie serves up our dinner.
As she places the plates in front of Ryan and I she adds, “Seriously though, after Mom and Dad died, this family would have fallen apart without you, ‘Alicia. You’ve been a rock to all of us, but now it’s my turn.
Let me share some of the burden with you. ”
“We’ll sort something out so no one is burdened,” Ryan says around a mouth of roasted Amish chicken and wild mushroom risotto.
Jackie smiles. “I like him,” she says, then quietly leaves the kitchen.
We eat in silence for a few moments, both absorbed in our food, and our thoughts. When the plates are empty, Ryan takes them to the sink and washes up without me even having to ask.
“Do you want me to make you a drink or anything?” he offers.
“Actually, what I’d really like is to take a shower and then snuggle in bed. Come on.”
I take Ryan’s hand and lead him through the house to my room. “Do you want to shower first or should I?”
“You go first,” Ryan insists. “I should have brought an overnight bag.”
Gathering my toiletries, I chuckle. “I’d lend you one of my T-shirts, but I don’t think they’d fit. I have a robe for when you’re done in the shower though.”
I take my things and head to the bathroom, still not able to quite believe what’s happened.
I never expected for Ryan to be this okay with the pregnancy, let alone so supportive of me, my family and everything we’ve got going on.
I try to take him at his word, and not let myself worry everything will someday become too much for him and he’ll leave.
If I allow myself to think like that, I’ll drive myself crazy.
After my shower, I return to the bathroom dressed in a long T-shirt I usually sleep in. Ryan glances at my legs and his eyes widen. “I know there were perks to spending the night.”
I laugh and shake my head. “You won’t be saying that in a few months when I’m the size of a beached whale.”
Ryan stands from the bed and pulls me into his arms. He kisses me gently, then gazes down into my eyes. “Alicia, I’ve already told you, you’re the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever met. And when our baby grows, I’m sure you will be glowing.”
My cheeks heat and I take a step back. I grab my bathrobe and thrust it at Ryan just to put some distance between us. He makes my head spin.
Seeming to understand, Ryan slips out of the room, leaving me alone to catch my breath.
I sit down on the bed, and start applying moisturizer, and as I do, I realize if Ryan and I are going to have any chance of a future together, we need to be up front about everything, and then once we are, I have to stop worrying.
When Ryan is done in the shower, and is now looking adorable wearing my fluffy bathrobe, he sits down on the bed beside me and takes both my hands.
“Alicia, while I was in the shower, I did some thinking and--” My heart hitches.
He’s changed his mind. No. I couldn’t bear it.
I start to cry -- damn pregnancy hormones -- but Ryan gently puts his fingers to my lips.
“No, please don’t cry. I’m not breaking up with you.
Quite the opposite in fact. I want you to marry me. ”
“You want me to marry me?” I squeak out. “But we’ve barely been dating a few weeks!”
Ryan chuckles. “Yes, but you’re having my baby, and I don’t want anyone else, Alicia.”
I sigh and spill out my heart. “You say that now, but what in a few months? Or a few years. This isn’t just about me and you. This is about the baby, and my brothers and sisters too. It’s a lot to take on.”
Ryan nods. “I know, and therefore I want you to marry me, so you see how serious I am about everything. Alicia, I love you. I want a future with you, and if that future involves your five siblings, so be it. It’s worth it to have you in my life.”
“You don’t know what you’re saying--” I begin to protest, but Ryan presses his fingers to my lips again.
“Do I strike you as the type of man who does something they’re not sure about? Alicia, I’m sure, so please. Trust me.”
I look into his blue-grey eyes, and for once, they don’t warn of a fierce storm to come, but rather offer steely protection and security.
“I trust you. But we must take this slow. Please, no talk of marriage just yet. Let's just take the next nine months for us to date and get to know each other. Then when the baby is born, we’ll work out what comes next.”
“Okay, we’ll take it slow,” Ryan agrees. “But I’m promising you now Alicia, I love you, and some day, you’re going to be my wife.”
I don’t argue this time, instead do what I promised myself I would. I take Ryan at his word and wait to see what the future holds.
Instead, I pull back the covers, and climb into bed, patting the space beside me. Ryan joins me in an instant, wrapping his arms around me and pressing his lips to mine.
This time, I let myself melt into the kiss, knowing nothing is going to interrupt us. Ryan’s hands start in my hair, but soon trail down my body, stopping at various places along the way to stroke and caress various areas.
He cups my cheeks, stroking them with the pad of his thumbs, and staring deeply into my eyes. Reflected at me I see a heart full of love, and a perfect future spreading out ahead of us.
Then, Ryan’s lips are on mine again, and his hands are snaking down from my face. He stops at my breasts, massaging them gently.
“This isn’t too rough, is it?” he whispers gently in my ear.
I shiver at the sensation of his breath on my neck, and reply, “No, it’s just right.”
Tenderly, he kneads my breasts, rolling the nipples between his thumb and forefingers until they’re stiff peaks, and I moan against his lips.
“I didn’t hurt you, did I?”
“No. It feels good,” I reply breathlessly.
Ryan keeps tugging on my nipples, his fingers being replaced by his lips as he sucks on each one in turn, until my breathing becomes ragged. Then, slowly, he manoeuvres down the bed, and settles between his legs.
“Am I safe to kiss you down there?” he asks, nudging my knees apart.
“I don’t see why not. From what I’ve read online, sex in the first few months is fine.”
Ryan’s gaze locks with mine and he grins. “Perfect.”
He nudges my knees apart to spread my legs, then lowers his head.
His tongue swipes up from my opening to my clit, and then swirls around it.
He sucks greedily, like he did on my nipples, and my hips buck.
He inserts two fingers inside me and curls them slightly, then starts pumping vigorously.
I feel my climax building, and my inner walls clench.
My legs lock around Ryan’s head, my hands fisted in his hair, as I come and he continues to lash his tongue over my clit and opening, until my whole body is shaking.
To stop myself from screaming out, I bite down on my bottom lip as the orgasm claims me, and the waves crash over my body. Ryan slows his pace, until my body is spent, and then carefully sits up.
He gives me a moment to catch my breath, then positions himself on top of me, gazing lovingly down into my eyes.
“Am I safe to…?”
“Please, god yes,” I reply breathlessly, and he slips inside me.
His fingers link with mine as he slowly moves inside me, our gaze never breaking. I lift my arms to loop around Ryan’s neck, bringing our bodies closer together. Our chests touch, and I can feel his heart beating against mine.
“I love you,” he says, and my heart bursts with happiness.
“I love you too.”
A moment later, Ryan grunts and I feel him come. We lay tangled in each other's arms until I’m almost asleep, then Ryan gently slips out of bed.
“I’m just going to wash up,” he whispers softly.
“Yeah, I should too,” I say, forcing myself out of bed.
In the bathroom, we clean up hurriedly, and then rush back to my room and dive under the covers.
Ryan wraps his arms around me, tugging me close so I’m spooned in his lap and his head is buried in my hair. Wrapped together, we slowly drift off to sleep…
All too soon, I’m awoken by the sounds of my siblings getting ready for the day. I groan and roll over in bed, then get hit by a wave of morning sickness.
I jump out of bed, grab my robe and rush to the bathroom to throw up.
When I return, Ryan is out of bed and dressed in his shirt and pants from the day before. “Are you okay?” he asks.
“Yeah, just the little one letting Momma know they’re there.”
“Nothing is wrong with the baby, is it?” Ryan asks, and the concern in his voice is so sweet all my annoyance at being woken early fades away.
“No, it’s fine. Apparently, the sickness is a good sign. Though from what I’ve read online, if it doesn’t calm down in the second trimester, I should speak to my doctor.”
“Is there anything I can do to help?”
“No, I’ll be okay soon. Let’s go down and grab some food while there’s some left.”
We head downstairs, and when we enter the kitchen, everyone looks at us. Dave smirks, Billy and Tommy seem unperturbed, and Evie jumps out of her seat to greet Ryan.
Shifting my weight awkwardly from foot to foot I say, “Well, I guess now is as good a time as any to let you all know Ryan and I are together.”
“Alicia has a boyfriend!” Tommy teases in a sing-song-voice and Billy starts snickering. Then the boys make kissing noises and pretend to gag.
“Is Ryan going to live with us now?” Evie asks.
“Not yet, sweetie. But he will be visiting a lot, and there’s something else we need to tell you. In about nine months, Ryan and I are going to have a baby.”
Billy, the youngest of my brothers, blinks at me curiously and then says, “Miss Johnson had a baby. She said the stork brought it to her. Will the stork bring your baby too?”
“What’s a stork?” Evie asks, dancing around Ryan’s feet, and I feel a migraine coming on. It’s too early in the morning to have this conversation.
Sensing my distress, Ryan says, “Who wants pancakes before school? Come on, everyone, grab your stuff and I’ll drop you off afterwards.”
The mention of pancakes has my siblings rushing to grab their school bags and coats, and I glance cautiously at Ryan.
“You don’t have to do this, you know?”
“I know, but I could see they were asking a lot of questions. This way, they’re distracted until we can come up with the best way to have ‘the talk’ with them.”
I glance at Jackie who smiles and shrugs. As pancakes for breakfast sound much more appealing than explaining where babies come from, I don’t protest any further.