Chapter 8 #2
“I knew I should’ve made you breakfast this morning even though you said you weren’t hungry.” He releases her with concern etched in every line of his face. “Let me take care of you and get you something to eat.”
They spent the night together.
The realization hits me like a punch to the solar plexus. Again, I have to suck in a ragged breath.
While I was in Malaysia choosing my business over her, she was here falling back into the arms of the man who wrecked her for years.
Cash addresses me, his voice casual but full of concern. “She picked sleep over food. I should’ve made sure she got both.”
“Callum, stop.” Livianna’s voice is sharp and desperate. “I’m sure he couldn’t care less about the details.”
She peers over at me with something that might be an apology gleaming in her eyes, but it only makes the betrayal cut deeper. Because I do care. I care more than I ever let myself admit. I care about the woman who demanded exclusivity.
And most of all, I love the survivor who built an empire while carrying the weight of everyone else’s secrets and lies. I love the firecracker who broke every rule I set because she somehow knew I needed her to.
Cash nods. “Right. I was just making an observation.”
My fingers tighten on the magazine. I brought it in with me to confront her with it, but now it’s evidence of how thoroughly I’ve lost her to her first love.
I step to them and hold it out. “My flight attendant shared this with me. Maybe you two want this copy to memorialize your second chance at love.”
He takes it and unrolls it. The cover shows Livianna smiling as she holds out a piece of pie and a cup of coffee. The headline confirms their reunion in bold, unforgiving print.
Livianna’s head snaps up to meet my empty stare. “I was just giving them a story and being nice. The media have always hated me, and I thought—”
“You told me that night you were ready to work with them this time instead of rubbing them the wrong way.” He studies her.
Her gaze bounces between us. Cash and me, her first love, and the man who loves her with no words.
The complicated dilemma swirls in her expression. Her hands wring together like she’s trying to hold herself together through sheer force of will.
But I know her tells. I know the urge she has to scratch at her wrists when she’s fighting panic and how her breathing changes when she’s overwhelmed. I know all of it because I’ve spent over two years discovering every beautiful, complicated piece.
My insides spiral into the abyss. I’ve been gone for two and a half weeks, and she’s already moved on. Or maybe she was never over him.
Either way, I’ve lost her to the man who was her first everything. Me… I’m the secret no one will ever know about.
“Cash, it’s great to see your dreams coming true.” I dip my chin at Livianna. “Livianna, have a wonderful time enjoying your relationship blossom again. If you two will excuse me, I have a conference call I need to get ready for.”
I leave them in the hallway. The second I’m through the door, I storm into my comfort zone. But it doesn’t help.
My legs tremble like I just lost a billion-dollar deal. My breathing kicks up and the blood whooshes through my ears.
Calm down, Jaxon. What you’re feeling isn’t real. They’re just emotions that can flow through you if you breathe.
I haven’t felt this kind of agony since… A flash of losing my entire family in one devastating explosion takes me over the edge. I loosen my tie, and my chest tightens with the kind of panic that makes me believe I’m suffocating.
My hands shake as I rush to the bookshelf behind my desk and press a hidden panel that reveals the entrance to my biometric blackout suite.
The elevator whisks me up to the private space above my office, my sanctuary designed to recalibrate my nervous system after high-risk decisions. It’s just like the one I have in all my headquarters.
The curved, seamless walls immediately shift to a deep crimson as the biometric sensors detect my elevated stress levels and the crushing loss I just experienced.
The air fills with bergamot and sandalwood, scents programmed to trigger calm, but nothing can quiet the tornado raging inside me.
I sink into the cushioned floor space, finally allowing myself to feel the full weight of cosmic cruelty. I financed his business, backed the label that gave him freedom, and helped create the man who could finally be worthy of her love.
And I did it all without knowing I was orchestrating my own heartbreak. It’s overwhelming how intertwined I’ve been in making their reunion possible.
The lights pulse between blue and violet, responding to the chaos of my emotions. This room has seen me through hostile takeovers, billion-dollar deals gone wrong, and government investigations that threatened everything I live for.
But nothing has prepared me for this…for the realization that I played architect to my own destruction. The dread arrives like a wave and leaves like wreckage.
When I can stand without falling over, somewhat composed but still gaping with a wound that will never heal, the elevator delivers me back to my office.
I step back into the room, adjusting my tie, and then my eyes meet hers. She’s standing by the window, pacing with her arms crossed like she’s hugging herself.
“Livianna—”
She motions behind me with concern painted on her face like a worried lover. “You have one here…the panic room?”
My stomach hardens. “I have one in all my headquarters.”
“Why did you go up there just now?”
“That question is irrelevant.”
“Is it?” She points toward the hallway. “Is what just happened out there irrelevant? Was what you did to me irrelevant?”
“What I did to you?” My broken laugh tumbles from my chest. “Fascinating.”
“Don’t mock me, Jax.”
“Please call me Jaxon. Jax has lost the charm.” It seems bitterness is easier than grief.
Agony swirls in her gaze, but is replaced in a flash. “Fine, Jaxon. I get it. This is what you do.”
“What’s that, Livianna? Hold you to some boundaries?”
“No. You flip into business mode the second things get too hard.”
I take two strides to get right in front of her to the point she has to lift her chin to see into my stupid, love-struck eyes. “It only took you two and a half weeks to move on, Livianna. I don’t need to discuss anything further.”
“It wasn’t like that. Besides, you’re the one who told me you thought we needed a breather while you were away. You told me to explore any relationship without any guilt.” A tear slips from the corner of her eye, and she bats it away. “Then you gave me your house as a goddamn consolation prize.”
“That wasn’t what I did.” I step back because I have a desire to kiss this all away. “I told you to breathe without me so you could see if you wanted in with me…for good.”
“Why?”
“You told me once you were in a relationship where you were unable to reach each other, and it destroyed you. I didn’t want that. I wanted you to trust in us and the foundation we created. And I sure as shit didn’t think you’d go off and hook up with your ex.”
Her face drains of color. “Then why didn’t you just say that?”
“Did you bother reading the letter I sent with the paperwork, or did you get defiant as soon as you saw it and write your goodbye email?”
She studies me as if she thinks I’m testing her. “What letter?”