Chapter 70
Sana woke to an empty bed and frowned as she sat up, looking around the moonlit room. A steaming kettle of tea sat on the golden coffee table across the room in front of an empty makeshift bed on the deep blue settee.
Her heart thumped at Rhyel, his hair tousled and blowing softly in the gentle breeze as he stood on the balcony bathed in moonlight, leaning against the banister holding a cup of tea with Sune on his shoulder gazing out at the ocean.
Talk to him. Tell him about the memory I showed you.
Ember purred.
Tell him what's in our heart.
Sana clenched the blankets and nodded. "Okay," she whispered. Although she was nervous to truly open her heart to him, she felt a stirring and an ache to at least acknowledge his feelings for her.
Slipping out of the bed, she wrapped her arms around herself as she padded across the warm sandstone floor.
Rhyel stiffened and turned to her as she stepped out on the balcony with his tired eyes full of trepidation as she neared him. "Sana, are... are you alright?"
She nodded. "I am," she said, holding out her hand to Sune who fluttered to her palm. "And I'm not angry with you, Sune." She pet his fuzzy mane atop his head. "I forgive you."
He fluttered from her hand to press his head against her forehead and his black beady eyes glowed in a soft golden hue.
Thank you, little flame, but I promise I will never hurt you like that again.
"I know you won't," she said, clenching her hands together. "But can you give Rhyel and I a moment alone?"
Of course. I understand.
Sune fluttered away from her and grazed Rhyel's shoulder before he flew beyond the balcony to the flourishing gardens below.
Sana's heart was pounding as she gazed at Rhyel, unsure of what to say or how to tell him how she felt.
The same way you told Kal in our dream. They are one in the same.
Ember said, flooding her veins with a calming warmth.
You don't have to be afraid to tell him anything.
Sana let out a slow breath, nodding to herself.
"Rhyel, I...I'm not mad at you, either." She bit her lip, closing her eyes.
"And I'm so sorry for the future you had to live through on your quest," she said, looking up at him expecting to see a well of hurt in his eyes, but there was nothing but tenderness and understanding in his depths, giving her the courage to keep telling him what was in her heart.
"I'm sorry I... I can't tell you that I love you, but it's not that I don't have feelings for you.
It's just that until I met you, I've never known what it meant or what it was like to have someone care for me like you do. "
"I know." A small smile tugged at the corners of his lips.
"I don't expect you to love me back, Sana, unless you want to and you're ready to," he said, taking her hands.
"And I'm not sorry for what I lived through.
I needed to or else it would've taken me far too long to understand how much you mean to me and my purpose in your life. "
"But it's your life too," she said, squeezing his hands. "Are you sure you're okay with this and... and what I am?"
Rhyel chuckled softly, shaking his head. "I should be the one asking you that, but yes, I'm fine. I know who I am and where my heart lies," he said, caressing the back of her hands. "But are you okay with this and who you are?"
Sana nodded. "I'm more okay with it now then I was a few hours ago," she said, taking a deep breath.
"Ember, my phoenix, she showed me the Zarathos when they lived among the Barahaa.
" A smile graced her lips. "I listened to their powerful songs, I saw the family I could've had with a coven that was mighty and strong.
It made me feel like I could find that in myself, too. "
She pressed a hand to her heart as Ember trilled and purred inside of her.
"And when I saw you as the dragon Kaladin, Ember told me about his love for his phoenix, Ragna and his heartbreak over losing her," she said, sliding her hand to his cheek.
"I know Kal awakened inside of you because I'm an Erius and he wants to redeem himself for what happened to Ragna. "
"Yes." Rhyel nodded. "We've talked about that, but that isn't the only reason he awakened or why we've come to love you."
"I know," she said, caressing his cheek. "I think it has a lot to do with Ember because she always loved Kaladin."
Rhyel's eyes grew wide before his muscles bulged and his black horns and wings sprouted from his back and head. He cupped his big clawed hands to her cheeks with his glowing red eyes pooling with unshed tears. "Your... your phoenix is Ember?"
"Yes," she whispered and sucked in a breath as a tingling warmth spread through her veins as if Ember's flame was trying to jump from her skin.
He remembers me!
Ember trilled and squawked in glee.
Sana laughed softly, wrapping her hands around Kal's wrists. "She's happy you remember her."
"Of course I do. She was my best friend," he said, crossing her cheeks. "I'm so sorry I didn't recognize your flame."
"She's very weak and her memories are hazy since she's been lying dormant inside of me for so long which is probably why you didn't recognize my phoenix."
"Probably," Kal murmured. "But I'm so glad it's you," he said, pulling her in his arms and nuzzling his face against her hair. "I know I never said it back then because I gave my heart and my loyalty to Ragna, but I always thought it was going to be you. I thought you were going to be my phoenix."
He... he always wanted it to be me, too?
Ember whispered and the longing in her voice echoed through Sana's mind.
I'm so glad our souls found each other again.
Sana wrapped her arms around his waist and breathed in his musky pine scent.
"I'm glad you're my dragon in this life," she whispered.
"I'm scared for what's to come, but I want to become the phoenix I was born to be," she said, holding him tight.
"And I want to know if my coven is still out there. I want to find them with... with you."
"We will." Rhyel pressed a kiss against her head before pulling away from her as his transformation faded.
"I was born to use my gifts and abilities to protect and guide you, Sana.
Kaladin and I haven't fully merged yet, but now that you know who we are I'm sure it'll be easier now and Rhys has always been ready to be whatever you need. "
Sana nodded, sliding her hand over his heart. "Then when we go home I want to train like the warriors and I want you to teach me how to merge with my phoenix, so I can understand my gifts and this fire inside of me."
"I can do that," he said, curling his hand around hers. "But what about now? How do you want to spend the rest of the festive season?"
A smile graced her lips at the gentle beat of his heart, thumping in rhythm with her dragon's breath humming against her skin. "I want to spend this time as we have been," she said, leaning up on her tiptoes to press a kiss against his cheek. "I still want you to court me, my Lord."
"My Lady." A low rumbling purr vibrated from Rhyel's chest and a warm tingle slid down Sana's spine, pooling in her gut as he tightened his arm around her waist. "There is nothing I would love more than to keep courting you," he said, curling his fingers under her chin.
"I still hope for the day you deem me worthy enough to love. "
She curled her fingers around the thin lapel of his tunic, gazing into his heady blue eyes. "I'm sure that day will come," she whispered, aching to drown in the tantalizing taste of his lips.
"Yes it will," he murmured, capturing her lips as if he heard her silent plea.
Sana melted in his embrace while Ember purred with delight and although there was still so much more they needed to talk about—the impending unknown darkness and destruction being the most tenuous matter—she was content to push that aside and live in this moment with Rhyel, just for now.
She wanted to enjoy the rest of the festive season, knowing she was no longer the ungifted Lightbourne and Rhyel would be by her side no matter what dangers lie ahead of them.
A/N: I'm glad Sana was honest with Rhyel about how she feels. It feels better that they're both on the same page now. No more secrets, no more tiptoeing around the truth. And it's so cute that Rhen always wanted to be Ember's dragon too ??.