Chapter 10
brADY
By the time I get home from the stadium, I’m feeling a lot more grounded. I still can’t believe that in a few months I’m gonna be a dad, but the panic is slowly fading and I’m starting to feel a little excited about it.
I never pictured having a baby this young, but hey, I never pictured having to step up and be the guardian to my siblings when I was just eighteen, either. That turned out okay, and so will this.
Besides, anything that brings the woman I haven’t been able to stop thinking about back into my life has to be a good thing.
Now I need to come up with a game plan for how to approach the next few months with Sage. How to earn her trust and get her to let me in so I can be a part of my kid’s life.
Step one of this plan: finding a job to supplement my baseball income.
But as I open my computer to start searching, a video call from Blair comes in, and I’m quick to answer that instead.
“Hey kids! How’s it going? You better not be skipping class to call me,” I say, teasing. My words find their mark in my sister.
“Oh my God, Brady, we’re eighteen. Not kids. You don’t have to be all bro-dad with us anymore.”
I swear, if Blair’s eyes could roll any farther back, they would.
“We’re totally fine, we’re safe, we’re studying. Relax.”
I clear my throat and look pointedly at Barrett on the screen. “How ’bout you, B?”
“He’s fine!” Blair says. “Besides we like, just saw you yesterday.”
“Thanks, Blair, I heard you. Now can I hear from your brother?”
She grumbles something, but I’m focused on Barrett. His soft smile comes quickly and easily as he jerks his head in a nod. “It’s all good, Brady. Really.”
“Can I talk now?” Blair moves back into the frame, her arms folded over her chest.
“Only if you’re gonna act like the adult you seem to think you are and stop pouting,” I point out. “How many times have I told you to stop talking for your brother? Let him answer sometimes.”
She lets out a huff but stays quiet. I look at the two of them, and it hits me. Their lives are also about to change in a major way when I tell them my news.
After all the awkward as fuck conversations I had to have with them about safe sex, now I have to admit that I managed to get a one-night stand pregnant.
Blowing out a breath, I sit up straighter. “I need to tell you two something. It’s, ah, kind of a big deal.”
I see them glance at each other, then lean in closer. Their faces look worried.
“It’s not a bad thing, I promise,” I hurry to reassure them. “Just big.”
“Okay, well then, freaking tell us already,” Blair says impatiently.
“I’m gonna have a baby.”
I blurt it out before I can lose my nerve. Blair’s mouth falls open, and Barrett leans back and runs his hand through his hair.
“Excuse me, what? Did you seriously just say baby? You. My boring older brother who has no social life whatsoever. You’re having a baby? Since when? With whom? How did this happen!”
Blair’s voice gets increasingly higher pitched and louder until Barrett is visibly wincing next to her. He puts his hand on her leg and leans forward.
“What she said, bro.”
I give them the short version, that I met Sage when I was back in Manitoba tying up loose ends for my move. That we didn’t stay in touch, so I had no idea she was pregnant until today.
Am I cringing the entire time? Yep. Nothing like discussing your fucking sex life with your younger siblings to humble a man.
But by the time I finish, Blair’s grinning and even Barrett has a pleased expression on his face.
“I’m gonna be the best auntie ever!” Blair cheers. “Oh my God, this is so cool. So, when is it coming? Wait, it’s not an it. Is it a boy? Or a girl? I hope it’s a girl, we need to even things out in this family. Ooh, maybe it’s twins! They’re genetic, you know.”
My stomach plummets to the floor at her words. Twins? No, Sage would’ve said so. If she even knows… I pick up my phone and open her contact, typing out the message on autopilot.
brADY: Do you know if it’s just one baby? Twins run in my family.
I stare at it without hitting send. I can’t say that over text, what if it freaks her out even more? I delete it and then set my phone back down and look back up at the twins, who are now talking quietly about something.
Clearing my throat to get their attention, I say, “I have no idea if it’s a boy or a girl. I just found out about the baby yesterday afternoon, so I’m still getting used to the idea. When I know more, I’ll tell you.”
“Brady, you better get used to it fast. Your baby mama has had a lot longer to adjust, and she’s not gonna want to wait for you to catch up.”
Blair’s words hit their mark.
“I know. Trust me.”
“How do you feel about it?” Barrett asks quietly.
I blow out a breath. “Million-dollar question, buddy.” I stop and try to make sense of all the tangled feelings swirling in my head. “I think at first I was panicked. A baby’s a big deal. An expensive big deal. And I’ve already got you two chuckleheads to worry about.”
Blair makes a sound of protest, but Barrett shoves her and she stays quiet.
“I definitely didn’t plan on having a kid. Not for a long while, at least. But it’s happening, and I’m not going to waste anyone’s time by being upset about it. There’s a lot to figure out, but I guess overall, I’m excited.”
“You’ll be a great dad.”
I blink at Barrett’s simple words. He doesn’t talk much, but when he does, fuck, he knows what to say. My eyes are burning, but I’ll be damned if I let any tears fall.
“Thanks, B.”
Blair sniffs and turns her head to the side, and I know I’m not the only one feeling emotional. But then she wipes her face and looks back at me. “Alright, tell me everything about her.”
“About who?”
Blair rolls her eyes. “The baby mama, duh. Is she pretty? She better be, my nibling needs to be cute.”
“What the hell is a nibling?” I ask, completely baffled.
“Well, since I don’t know if it’s a niece or nephew, it’s a nibling for now,” she answers matter-of-factly, as if this should have been obvious.
Nothing like a younger sister to make you feel old as dirt.
“Anyway. Tell us about the mom. What does she do? Where does she live? Are you guys going to live together? Ooh, are you dating her?”
Jesus, her questions are coming hard and fast and I don’t know how to answer them. Which is making me appreciate Sage’s insistence that we need to get to know each other a hell of a lot more. Because the fact that I can’t even answer the question about what Sage does for work is not acceptable.
I want to be a part of my kid’s life, which means I’ll be a part of her life, too. And that opens the door to possibilities I haven’t let myself think too much about…
“She’s very pretty, she’s staying with a friend in a nearby town, and the rest is none of your business,” I say firmly, staring at Blair through the screen.
“I’ve already told you more about my personal life than I ever wanted to.
So you’ll stop asking about it unless you want me getting just as nosy about yours. Got it?”
Blair rears back, holding her hands up. “Okay, geez, no need to go bro-dad again.”
She says it a little too quickly, and I narrow my eyes at her. “So, there’s no fake ID or sneaking into bars?”
“Definitely not, bro-dad, sir.” Blair shakes her head firmly but judging by the sideways look Barrett’s giving his twin, I’m thinking maybe I do need to stay on top of my sister’s social life now that she’s out of the house.
Then again, she’s smart. They both are. And right now I don’t have the mental capacity to worry about whether she’s drinking underage.
I do, however, make a mental note to text Barrett separately later.
“Okay. So, moving on.”
The twins and I talk for a while longer, and while it’s always good to talk to them, it also makes me miss having them around, even if they were just here. When I close my computer, the apartment feels quiet and empty without their voices.
I get up and head to the bathroom, but as I’m washing my hands, I find myself staring at the sink. There’s none of Blair’s stupid long hair clogging the drain here.
It’s such a random thing to notice, but I guess with having just talked to the twins, they’re on my mind.
Back in the kitchen, I open the fridge to get a beer, and don’t have to move countless cans of Barrett’s favourite pop aside to get to one.
Damn, I miss them.
Beer in hand, I move back to the couch and drop down on it, grabbing the remote. I get to choose what to watch, every night. There’s no one here to fight me on it. I get to pick what I want at the grocery store and what to cook for each meal.
It’s great. For once, I get to be selfish. I don’t have to consider anyone else when I make day-to-day decisions. Hell, I can walk around naked if I want. I’m living the life I would’ve had all along if my parents were still alive.
And it feels so empty.