Chapter 9
brADY
I don’t recall driving home from the store. Guess I was on autopilot. I spent last night staring at nothing, trying to wrap my head around what happened.
Never in a million years did I expect to see Sage again, and pregnant with my kid at that.
What are the chances she’d end up visiting a friend here, of all places?
Now it’s the next morning, and I’m headed to the stadium. As I load my gear into my car, a woman walks by me, pushing a stroller. I freeze, watching her.
In less than a year, that could be Sage and our child.
I’m having a baby.
And I don’t know the first thing about what that means. Well, that’s not entirely true. I did spend way too much time last night googling, and panicking.
Turns out, despite their small size, babies are expensive. They do nothing but eat, sleep, and poop, so they apparently go through diapers faster than a Formula One racer goes through tires.
And then there’s Sage. I’ve never been around a pregnant woman, but I’ve seen enough movies to assume she’s going to need a lot of things. Special pillows, late night snack runs, and who the hell knows what else.
Not me, that’s for sure.
My stomach has been churning all morning, worrying about how the hell I’m going to afford it all when I’m barely making it work for me and the twins right now.
For once I wish the drive to the stadium was longer, simply so I’d have more time to try and get my head on straight.
Instead, my jaw is starting to ache from how tightly it’s clenched as I walk toward Dom’s office.
I’m nervous for this meeting, that’s for damn sure.
But it’s necessary. I’d texted the CEO of the Thunder last night, once I got my shit under control mentally, to let him know I needed to see him and the head coach ASAP.
They have to know what I’m dealing with, in case it interferes with anything the team needs.
Still, I’m terrified about what the outcome of this meeting might be.
There’s a chance they won’t want to deal with their new player suddenly finding out about a baby he never knew existed, to say nothing of how they might react if I need time off for appointments with Sage or anything else that might come up.
I feel sick.
Dom’s waiting for me. “Dixie. Take a seat,” he says, gesturing to a chair before coming around to lean against his desk in front of me. “I asked Isla to join us, she’ll be here in a second, along with Rafe. Do you want to tell me what’s happening or should we wait for them?”
“We can wait,” I say nervously.
The door opens to reveal Isla, the new head of marketing, and Luca, the former owner. They’re together now, which is why Dom took over running the team so Luca wouldn’t be dating his employee.
“What’s going on?” Isla asks as Luca closes the door behind them.
Thank fuck, Dom answers for me. “Dixie’s got something to share, we were just waiting for everyone to get here so he only has to say it once.”
There’s another knock, but without waiting for an answer, Rafe walks in, coming straight to my side and crouching down. “Dix? What’s up? You okay?”
This is it. Once I say this, once I verbalize it to other people in my life, it’s real. I mean, I know it already is, but there’s really no going back as soon as I put the words out into the world myself.
But maybe I’ve been keeping too many secrets for too long. Maybe it’s time I tell them my whole truth.
“I’m okay, but…” I pause and take a shaky breath. “Fuck. I can’t believe I’m gonna say this. I didn’t…I never…”
“What is it, Dixie? Just say it,” Rafe says firmly.
I look at him. I’m sure he can see the overwhelm etched across my face.
“I’m gonna be a dad.”
The room is so silent you could hear a pin drop. It’s now or never. If I’m going to tell them everything, share my story for the first time in eight years, it might as well be now.
“The reason I never played college ball or went pro is because my parents died in a car crash almost eight years ago, and I had to step in and raise my younger siblings. It was hard, but we made it. And now they’re good, in university, and I’m here.
And I’m freaking out, because the season just started, and I want to play ball.
Fuck, I need to play ball. It’s who I am, it’s all I know. ”
It’s hard to breathe. I have to focus on the action, to draw air into lungs that currently feel like they’re caving in. I can’t look at anyone’s face; I don't want to see pity there when I don’t need it.
“I never thought about having kids of my own, kinda figured that was it for me with the parenting gig. But this is happening. I just found out a girl I was with a couple months ago is pregnant. I don’t know what to do with babies.
I was grossed out by the twins when they were born because I was eight and I just wanted to hang out with my friends. And holy shit. I’m having a kid.”
I drop my head into my hands, all of a sudden feeling lightheaded.
Back home, our town was small enough that word spread quickly, and everyone knew what had happened to the Dixon family.
Aside from the therapist the twins and I went to, I’ve never once had to tell anyone what happened.
My aunt and uncle took care of contacting the college I was meant to attend.
At the twins’ school, everyone that needed to know already knew, and I was able to retreat behind a wall I built without even realizing it.
A protective wall that allowed me to pretend I didn’t feel any resentment over having to give up my dreams, and that I wasn’t so goddamn angry at my parents for dying and leaving me in charge of the twins when my own life was meant to be just beginning.
But now I’ve told my story. The short version, at least. And I’m totally unprepared for how to handle whatever reactions my new employers might have.
“Dixie, breathe.” Rafe’s voice penetrates my chaotic haze, and I lift my head, my eyes unfocused, not really seeing him. “That’s it. Breathe, kid.”
I do as he says, sucking in several deep breaths.
“Brady, I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t begin to imagine what you went through.” Isla’s soft voice filters in next, and I feel her hand on my shoulder.
“It takes a strong man to step up like that,” Rafe says gruffly.
I blink at them, my vision clearing.
“And I can tell it took a lot of courage to tell us. Thank you for trusting us with your story,” Dom says solemnly.
My head tilts down in a quick nod.
“As for the news about a baby, well…” Rafe clears his throat and gives me a small, rueful grin. “Believe it or not, you’re not the only person in this room to be taken by surprise by a kid at some point in their lives.”
Isla snorts a laugh from behind me. “That’s for darn sure. Try finding out you’re pregnant at seventeen.”
“Try finding out you have a kid when that kid is already a teenager,” Rafe fires back.
My gaze bounces between the two of them. They’re looking at me with compassion and support. And when I look at Dom, I see the same.
Not pity, just understanding.
And the anvil sitting on my chest suddenly feels a hell of a lot lighter.
“We’re here for you, Dix. The Thunder are a family. That’s what Luca wanted when he got the crazy idea to turn this team around, and that’s what we promised you when we convinced you to join us. Whatever you need, we’re here.”
My shoulders sag with relief. “Thank you.” I swallow around the lump in my throat. “I, ah, I need to find a job for the offseason.”
Fuck, this is awkward.
Rubbing the back of my neck, I drop my gaze to the floor as my cheeks heat. “Not that you don’t pay us fairly, but I’m gonna need more if I have a baby to support. So, I guess if you hear of any jobs that might work with our schedule, could you let me know?”
“I’ll put some feelers out,” Luca says promptly. There’s not even a hint of judgment in his voice despite the fact he’s a literal millionaire, and I just admitted to needing money. “No matter what, it’ll be okay, Dixie.”
For some reason, I believe him.
Once again my entire life has been turned inside out. But this meeting went better than I could have ever hoped.
The panic and overwhelm is still there, but along with it is a strong determination to prove myself worthy to Sage.
Dom said it took courage for me to tell them my story.
What kind of courage did it take Sage to find out she was pregnant and decide what to do, all on her own? The strength, compassion, and selflessness in her that made her choose to keep the baby and try to find me has me in awe.
I don’t know what it’ll take, but no matter what, I’ll be there for whatever Sage and our baby need.
They won’t be alone ever again. Not if I have anything to say about it.