Chapter 14
SAGE
“You don’t have to drive out here tonight, we can get together another day when I haven’t had to work,” I say to Fiona as I walk back to the hotel from the hospital, fighting back a yawn. It wasn’t a super busy shift, but twelve hours on my feet is still a lot.
“Unless you tell me you’re so tired you just want to go to sleep, I still want to come. I don’t care if we order takeout to your hotel room or go to that diner where you and Brady had breakfast. I just want to see you and the nugget.”
I smile to myself. The nugget, also known as the baby growing inside of me, has finally popped my belly out enough to be noticeable.
Not a lot, I mean, I’m only seventeen weeks along, but my previously flat-ish stomach definitely has a soft rounding to it.
My jeans are getting snug, and I already had to buy bigger bras.
“Fine, come on out.”
“Joke’s on you, bitch, I’m already on my way.”
I laugh, shaking my head. “Why am I not surprised? See you soon.” Pocketing my phone, I walk through the sliding door of the inn, only to be flagged down by the person working at the front desk.
“Ms. McCallister, sorry to interrupt your evening, but do you have a moment?”
“Sure,” I say, changing direction and going to the desk.
The woman, whose name tag reads Ethel, gives me a smile. “I noticed you’re on a week by week booking with us and wanted to confirm you wish to extend your stay before we process the transaction tomorrow.”
“Oh. Yes, thanks, I’ll be staying another week.
” I try not to grimace. The truth is that my bank account is suffering with the cost of staying here.
But the rental market is truly abysmal, especially for short-term, furnished suites.
As disappointing as it is, this hotel is the most reasonably-priced option.
“Wonderful, you’ll receive your receipt via email tomorrow. Have a lovely evening, Ms. McCallister.”
I dip my chin and say, “Thanks,” before making my way to the elevator. Once inside, I lean back against the wall, my head hitting it with a light thump. “Fuck.”
I drag my feet down the short hall to my room and unlock the door. I only have five and a half more months on my contract at the hospital, before I go on maternity leave. Then there will be childcare to consider, plus supporting myself and a baby.
The mental math makes my head hurt. I have no idea how I’m going to afford everything.
And this feels like something I can’t leave up to chance.
Grabbing a pillow, I cover my face with it and scream.
I have to come up with a plan. Ugh.
When Fiona knocks on my door a short while later, I’m showered and changed, but no less frustrated. Which is why, as soon as she walks in, I collapse into her arms.
“Why are there no decent short-term rentals in this freaking place? Your couch is looking more and more appealing as the days go on,” I grumble half-heartedly.
Laughing, Fiona pats my back. “I’d be generous and give you my room.”
We pull apart and sit down on the edge of the bed.
“That’s very generous, and very tempting.
I’ve never had so much trouble finding somewhere to live,” I say, raking my damp hair back into a messy braid.
“It’s never mattered whether I’m in a big city or a small town; there have always been options.
I can’t believe that now, when I need somewhere to live more than ever, there’s nothing. ”
Fiona rubs my leg sympathetically. “And I’m guessing hotel beds are not designed for pregnant ladies’ sleep requirements.”
I wrinkle my nose. “It’s so lumpy, Fi. I have no idea how I’ll get comfortable in a few more months.”
Hopping up to stand, Fiona turns and holds out her hands. “C’mon. We’ll hit the diner for some burgers and shakes, and then, I dunno, go watch a movie or something. I know you’re tired, but you need to get out of this room. ”
“You’re not wrong there,” I say, standing and moving to the door where I left my shoes. “Not that I want much in terms of a social life, but spending my evenings here is a real downer.”
As we walk out the door of my room, Fiona asks casually, “Have you seen Brady?”
“Yeah, we’ve talked on the phone, and we’ve gone out for breakfast a few times. And,” I pause, chewing my lip. “He drove me home from work last night.”
“That was nice of him. So when do you have plans next?”
I shrug. “I don’t know.”
She’s quiet for a moment, but I can feel the heat of her gaze on me as I fidget with my phone.
“What?” I finally ask, the word coming out more curt than I intended.
Fiona holds up her hands. “Nothing. Just think it’s odd you aren’t prioritizing spending more time with the guy you’re literally here to spend time with. Has that been his choice or yours?”
I blow the air out of my mouth on a noisy exhale as we exit the elevator into the parkade, and I follow her to her car. “Mine, probably. I don’t know, I mean, I’m sure he’s busy playing baseball, and I’ve been working, and…” I trail off.
It’s a feeble excuse, and I know it. I’m sure if I asked, Brady would make time to see me. The man waited over an hour for me to get off work just so he could drive me home, for crying out loud.
“What are you afraid of?” Fiona asks gently as we get into her car. She doesn’t turn the engine on, instead shifting in her seat to face me. “Are you still scared he’s not going to be a good guy? Because you’ll never know if you don’t give him a chance, Sage.”
“I know,” I groan, letting my eyes close as I rub my temples. “Trust me, I know I’m the problem right now. The more time I spend with him, the better he seems. But what if it’s all an act? It’s happened before, I’ve dated guys that seem great at first, only to be real assholes later on.”
Her hand lands on my leg. “But they weren’t Brady.
What if he really is one of the good ones?
What if you’re wasting all this time being afraid for nothing?
I mean, I know I’m awesome and all, and I’ll be there for whatever you need.
Appointments, I got you. Birth class? Sure, I’ll learn how to breathe with you.
Heck, I’ll be in the delivery room if you need me to be. ”
I open my eyes and give her a grateful smile, but she’s not done.
“But I’m not the one who should get to do that with you. Your baby’s father is.” She inclines her head to the side.
“He wants to be at all the appointments,” I mumble quietly.
“Because he’s maybe—just maybe—a good guy.”
As if to prove her point, my phone chooses that exact moment to light up with a message. I don’t even have to look down to know it’s him.
But Fiona does. She grabs my phone from my hands and reads it out loud. “‘Hey, hope you had a good day. Baby is the size of a pear now.’” She looks at me, her hand going to her chest. “Oh my God, Sage!”
I gesture at the phone. “Keep reading.”
“‘My sister wants to know if you’ll be finding out the gender. I tried telling her it was none of her business, and your decision, but she’s forcing me to ask.
Sorry, hope that’s okay.’” She makes a squealing sound that hurts my ears.
“Okay, this man is adorable. And loves his sister. So far, green flag.”
My hand has drifted to my stomach as I try to imagine who’s inside. A little boy with Brady’s wavy dark hair? Or a little girl with my green eyes?
“Oh, he just sent another one!” she says excitedly. “Stop. He’s too cute.”
She clears her throat and reads the next message. “‘I went past a toy store today, and they had little plastic baseball bats and balls. It was hard not to buy them.’”
Dropping my phone, Fiona grabs my shoulders and gives me a gentle shake. “Stop getting in your own way, girl. It’s not just your baby that deserves to have him in their life. Have you considered that maybe you do, too?”
Ignoring her last question, I take my phone and read through the messages for myself.
She’s right, Brady has done nothing wrong.
I’m just the cynic who wonders if he’s too good to be true.
But I don’t want to be that way, really I don’t.
Which is why, before I can overthink it, I force my fingers to type out a response.
SAGE: Hi, I’m just going out to grab a bite to eat with my friend Fiona so can’t chat long. The baseball set sounds perfect for when they get older… but maybe not quite yet. And let your sister know we haven’t decided yet? I guess we should talk about that kind of stuff.
I bite my lip, then type another message.
SAGE: My first appointment with the local midwife is this Monday. I’m sorry I didn’t give you more of a heads up but they just confirmed it this morning. You don’t have to come if you’re busy with a game or whatever, but if you want to, it’s at 3, the clinic is close to the hospital.
In the two seconds it takes for him to reply, my mind goes through a dozen different scenarios. He’ll be busy, he’ll make up an excuse, there’s no way he can be available so last minute, he’ll get mad that I didn’t give him more warning.
But once again, I’m wrong.
brADY: I’ll be there.
“Well? What did he say? What did you say?” Fiona asks impatiently. “You’re smiling, so it’s gotta be good.”
I look up at her after shutting off my phone. “He’s coming to my midwife appointment on Monday.”
“Good. I’m proud of you.” Her tone has grown serious. “Just remember, everything he’s said and done up till now has been positive. Right?”
At my nod, she continues.
“Trust that. Trust your gut. Give him a chance to continue to show up, and who knows, maybe everything will work out even better than you think.”
Her statement is loaded with unspoken meaning, and I shift in my seat, not wanting to acknowledge it.
I’m only just wrapping my head around the idea of being a single mom. I’m nowhere near ready to consider the possibility of not being a single mom.