Chapter Fifteen
Middle Of The Night
FBI West
Back Entrance
Yes, it was official. Elizabeth was bone-weary tired. At that very moment, the weight of the world was crushing down on her, and there was no doubt that she was at her max for this.
Chasing Devon was wearing her down, and that part of his plan was panning out.
If she didn’t get her head on a pillow, or a balled-up jacket in a corner and soon, she was not going to be able to pull this off. Someone needed a nap.
Granted, as soon as she closed her eyes, she was going to see the nightmare she’d just left.
No.
Doubt.
Only, that was neither here, nor there. She still had a job to do, and that was to eliminate the threat to her family.
For now, Devon was ahead.
While he had time to prepare, eventually, she’d catch up.
Yes, she was running on fumes.
No, she wasn’t giving up.
Now, she was so angry she could chew through steel to get to him.
All she had to hope was she held on. Deep down, Elizabeth knew that something was going to give, and it was likely going to be her.
With Rayna onboard, and the police cruiser being brought in by one of her security guys, Elizabeth had to hope that something would be found by way of a clue left by the man.
Granted, she knew it wouldn’t.
Slater was too good at this game, and she’d caught him off guard. There was no way he had time to plant any clues to give her a hint.
This would be an impromptu kill fest, leaving her behind in the game.
And that was on her.
After all, she’d pushed his buttons.
Still, she had to hope that he’d leave one little breadcrumb for her to use against him.
Fingers.
Were.
Crossed.
As they placed Rayna’s body in the body elevator, Elizabeth rode up with her. In that moment, she felt the need to apologize.
“I’m sorry, Rayna. I’m sorry that I didn’t strong-arm you more to make you come in for protection duty. More so, I’m sorry because I’m going to have to tell Caspian that he’s lost you. I hope you forgive me.”
Because that was what she needed.
For what happened.
And what was coming.
As the elevator moved slowly, it hummed as the cables carried them up.
“I’ll make sure he’s okay. I know he’s going to hate me, but I’ll carry it. I’ll make sure he gets through this, and that he gets justice—as do you.”
She placed her hand on the bag and stared down at her scabbing knuckles.
The rage was gone.
Now, all that was filling her was pain—pain for herself, and pain for everyone this had touched. Yes, she knew this wasn’t her fault.
How was she supposed to know that twenty years ago, a serial killer would see a news story about an up-and-coming agent, and he’d become fixated?
She couldn’t.
But as the head of this family and the boss at the FBI, each and every death was on her.
Jet Donato.
Vivian Hill.
Rayna RunningWolf.
She’d carry those bruises to her heart because she’d chosen this path.
Or this path had chosen her.
She wasn’t quite sure which it was anymore. What seemed like choice now felt like Fate handing her a bucket of shit.
Honestly, more times than not, this was a burden and a curse. Wading through the blood of the dead was not something she’d wish on just anyone.
Trust and believe.
As the elevator came to a stop, and the doors opened, Chris was standing there.
Watching her.
He was taking it in, and his wife looked beyond tired. With everything that had happened in the last year, he knew she was wearing thin.
With Charlie, their daughter, nearly dying.
With Wyler’s cancer coming back.
With the chase to this side of the country.
To Ethan telling her he couldn’t go back to DC.
And now this?
How much more could his woman take before she cracked?
He wasn’t one hundred percent sure, but he knew her breaking point was right there. They were merely dancing around it, flirting with the disaster that would happen when it shattered apart around them.
Then, it would be cataclysmic.
He could tell.
“Elizabeth.”
When he headed in, she moved into his body and just put her head on his shoulder.
She was broken inside.
Not all the rage and revenge in the universe would make any of this right. The twisted evil of one man, taught to his son, had pretty much decimated their world.
And she didn’t know how to undo it.
For the life of her, she didn’t think she had the strength to fix them when she didn’t know how to fix herself.
This was going to take time to fix, and she knew it. What she didn’t know was if she had the strength to do the repairs. For the first time in her life, she was officially done.
Empty.
Yes, she’d wanted to walk before, but not like this. This wasn’t a ‘walk away from the job’ kind of a thing.
This was a ‘RUN from EVERYONE’ kind of a moment.
As he held her, Chris picked up her one hand and kissed her knuckles, seeing them damaged.
He knew what went on because Gene had warned them after her retreat to the gym.
Now, it was about handling the problem at hand.
“I don’t want anyone to know what happened to her,” she whispered. “I don’t want Caspian to ever find out the truth, Christopher. He’ll die. I can’t bury another Marine. Ivan can’t lose another friend, and we can’t lose another son.”
He knew how she was feeling, and that was exactly why he’d said he’d help her. It wasn’t a favor she needed to request. It was an obligation to their family, and being part of that family meant carrying the weight, too.
Way too often, they let her carry it, and that wasn’t fair.
Lifting her chin, so she was staring into his eyes, he was more than willing to go rogue for his wife.
There was no person on this planet that he would do that for but her.
“I need a favor back,” he admitted.
She stared into his eyes, and he saw the exhaustion of being asked one more thing of her. Chris knew she’d given everything she had to being a mother, a wife, and the Deputy Director of the FBI.
And she was empty.
“What?” she asked.
He took her face in his hands.
“When this is over, take some time to recover. You never take time for you. That’s what the doctor is ordering. I’m not going to bitch about how you’re working with a sore arm, or how you’re running on fumes, but when this is over, I need you to rest for a bit.”
She said nothing.
So, he continued.
“I’m willing to break the rules, but I need you to heal, too. You’re not coming back from this if you keep going, Elizabeth. I’ll take care of the kids. We will cover for you. Just think about it.”
She closed her eyes.
Oh, if he only knew the conversation she had with Ivan. She might suspect he told Chris, but she knew Ivan wouldn’t do that. He was loyal to the family, but he was more loyal to her.
Brother to sister.
When she opened her eyes, she was honest.
“I need you to remember something,” she stated.
Chris waited.
“That day in Colombia, I meant every single word I said in that church. The day I married you, I meant it for life.”
He held her.
Deep down, he wanted to freak out by those words, but he refused to let the fear win.
Chris had to believe she’d make it through this storm.
“Me too, Sweetness. I love our family, and the men we’ve bound ourselves too, but you were always the core for me, and you always will be.”
She nuzzled him, taking in that scent so she could find more strength. Chris was one of the strongest people she knew. He fought valiantly with his HIV, and to stay by her side. She respected his integrity, his sweetness, and his tenacity.
“You’ve been the best partner when I needed him the most,” she said. “Even when we broke up, I held you in my heart, keeping the faith.”
He knew she did.
“We will get through this. I promise.”
Elizabeth wasn’t so sure they would, but she wouldn’t say shit to make him worry. God knew he worried about her plenty.
“Thank you for doing this,” she said. “Caspian will come to see her. Please don’t let him unless she’s…better.”
She didn’t have to explain. He was fully expecting her body to be one hell of a hot mess. He’d put her back together again and then have her cosmetically fixed for burial.
“Don’t worry. I have a plan.”
Thank God someone did.
She was flying by the seat of her pants on this one.
“Where is he?” she asked, knowing he’d be well aware of who she was referring to.
“He’s with Ethan in his office suite. Do you want me to tell him?” he asked. “I will.”
She shook her head.
“No. He’s going to lash out. It’s best he only hates one of us, and that it be me.”
Chris reminded her.
This was NOT her fault.
People had free will.
Sometimes, unfortunately.
“You told Rayna to head in. You personally went to her and tried to get her to go into custody for her safety. Ethan tried too. Caspian tried. We all tried, Elizabeth. We told her the outcome, and if I remember correctly, she laughed and said she was a cop and could hold her own. I’m not one to blame the victim, but free will matters, and it also plays into it when there is a bad outcome. ”
She was aware.
Still, it was her job to protect, and Elizabeth knew the potential outcome.
“Maybe I should have just forced her,” she said. “My gut told me it was dangerous.”
He was to the point.
“You can’t make a person bend their will when they don’t want to,” he reminded her. “She told you no, said it was ridiculous, and wouldn’t take your advice. We offered, Sweetness. In life, we all have to make choices, and she made hers. Do you know how she was taken?”
Elizabeth was piecing it together.
“We think she met him somewhere between the bar and her place. I’m thinking she saw someone who didn’t belong there, or needed her assistance.”
He was curious.
“Did you find how he got onto the rez?”
She shook her head.
“He wouldn’t use his own vehicle. It will be stolen or rented.
Unfortunately, we drove back going that way, and there was no sign of anything.
It’s a big Rez. If we have to waste time calling every car rental place in Utah, I’m going to be behind.
Plus, he likely didn’t use a car from around here.
He’d pick a different state, again, to slow me down. ”
Speaking of being behind…
“The tip line?”
He had spoken to Callen not long ago, and he’d updated him on that.