Chapter 28 #2
“So why aren’t there more locations they can be watched from? Like in the glade?”
“That would put the full burden of watching them on someone else. It’s my job.”
She frowned. “That’s too much for one person though. You’ll get sick. Nobody can function on no sleep. Have you ever asked for help? Told someone it’s simply too much?”
“I have help now. Seir and Coltor can assist. Occasionally, Seir calls in a favor, and the majority are monitored from Hell. Merry has taken over the familiar bonds, and you’re here for the deals.
It’s infinitely better than it was. But I’ve done it this way always.
For centuries.” I bit back the lie that almost slipped out, the one where I told her I was fine.
I knew I wasn’t. I was better, but I had been slowly breaking for a very long time, and it would take a while for me to be fully back to myself.
“But it’s still too much. And it sounds like you’re doing things the old way just because. Maybe there are more efficient methods you could employ. You know, if you asked some questions?”
“You sound like my brothers.” I couldn’t stop the smile that tugged at the corners of my mouth.
“I can’t help it if they’re right.” She huffed. As she reached for a teacup, her eyes widened in alarm, and her body stiffened.
“Phin?”
“Wings.” She panted the word just before they slowly slid out, flexed, then retracted. “That one was better.” Her upper body trembled. “Didn’t hurt as much.”
“That’s good,” I said, remembering the items in my pocket. “Here.” I dropped her jewelry into her hand and set the mirror and elixir vials on the tray next to the cups. “I thought maybe these would help.”
“Thank you.” She looped the necklace over her head and fastened the bracelet around her wrist. She picked up the little vials and inspected them both, the shimmer catching the light.
“Greta said the blue for healing, the light green for the other things, and if you needed anything, to reach out. I’m sorry, I wish I would have remembered earlier. Would it help to speak with her? I know you did earlier, but perhaps whatever this is changes things?”
“Yes. I think I should.”
I activated the mirror, and Vassago’s face popped up.
“Miss me so soon, Tap?” he teased.
“Hardly. I’ve seen your face more in the last few weeks than in the last several decades, brother.”
Vago snorted. “And what a treat that must be for you, you’re welcome. What can I do for you, brother?”
“Phin would like to speak with Greta, if she has a moment?”
Vago’s playful expression dropped into concern. “Of course. I hope everything is alright.”
I looked at Phin, who was taking in the device with wide eyes. “Not really. Phin is experiencing some odd symptoms.”
“Odd how?” Greta’s face joined Vassago’s in the glass. She pulled a pair of protective spectacles up off her eyes, resting them on the top of her head as she looked between us.
I hesitated again, but Phin nodded that I should continue. “She’s been feverish. Her wings broke through and retracted many times over the last couple of hours. They are unresponsive to her control.”
“Mm. Phin?”
“Yes?” Phin, who had been allowing me to guide the conversation thus far, clutched a pillow to her chest.
“I don’t know how long it will take me to make a new batch. Not long, once we can find some of the difficult-to-locate ingredients, but that has to happen first.”
Phin clenched. “Ophelia destroyed what I had left.”
“So you said, I’m sorry. But she was right, it was for the best. Are you taking the light-green elixir?”
“I will.”
“Every day, or at least as many as possible.” She raised an eyebrow and Phin nodded that she understood. “You’ve mentioned not feeling like yourself several times, what does that mean exactly? I want to be sure I get this right.”
Phin shifted next to me, picking at a thread on the shirt.
“Before I moved to the crossroads, my freezing episodes were more frequent. Now they aren’t as often but they’re unpredictable.
I was pretty numb when I lived at the church, if I’m honest. I thought at first when I got here that maybe I was just remembering how to feel again.
” My heart squeezed for her, for all the years she’d been forced to exist as a shell of herself.
“Now, everything is extremes. My emotions, my hunger, even my … temperature.” Phin’s eyes widened and Greta nodded gently.
“I’m moving as quickly as I can, I promise. But I think you need to prepare for the possibility that it’s already too late. You will likely start to heal from the side effects of the harmful parts of the old formula as well, which may cause new symptoms.”
My stomach rolled. “Too late? For what exactly? And what are we healing?”
Phin’s mouth tightened, but she didn’t address my questions.
“The apothecary had only guessed what herbs would work based on the sample from your original version of the tincture. I was thinking maybe we’d try shepherd’s plight?
It’s difficult to find, perhaps more so even than bride’s bane, but wouldn’t come with some of the negative side effects.
Given what Ophelia tasted …” Her mouth tightened with frustration.
“I want to find you the right recipe, Phin. We’re basically starting fresh. ”
“The trio of angels visited not long before they could no longer produce it for you, didn’t they?
” I asked, remembering Father Morton mentioning that during our first visit.
Phin nodded. I made eye contact with Vassago, and he quirked an eyebrow.
Perhaps the apothecary had been encouraged by the visit to stop making the thing that kept Phin safe.
That was a mixed blessing, given that they were poisoning her to keep her hidden.
I spun my ring, wondering if I could work in a little bit of time with my tattooing quill.
It seemed the beginning and end of my stress came back to setting ink lately.
“There are several places that might be suitable for Rylan’s poison garden I haven’t had a chance to explore yet.
Either of those herbs might grow wild in those places.
We can check? If it will help.” Anything to help.
And I wasn’t even positive I knew what we were talking about, though if bride’s bane was involved, I could make a reasonable guess.
“Yes. Please,” Phin answered quickly.
“Of course. I’ll ask Seir if he can mind the hall so we can explore a few starting tomorrow morning.”
Greta nodded, expression grave. “Good luck. I’ll see if there’s anything else I can find in the meantime, and I’ve already asked Rylan to check with his sources to see if they have any leads.
Starting the mix without either bride’s bane or a suitable replacement and an incomplete formula won’t do much good.
There are other elixirs in my books, I’ve just not found one that meets all the requirements yet. But I’ll keep searching for you.”
“Thank you, Greta.”
“Best to you both. We’ll be in touch soon.” I severed the connection, which left Phin and I to stare at one another.
“I won’t pressure you for details you don’t want to share, Phin, but could you reassure me that you’re alright at least?
” My pulse was loud in my ears, my hands unsteady from the way my blood was surging.
It wouldn’t have surprised me if my demonic features had started to show as out of control as I felt.
“I’m okay. I mean, I’m not sick. It’s a … fertility thing.”
I inhaled slowly through my nose. “I do most of my tattooing when I’m agitated, and I could use a little bit of focus right now.” I realized as I said the words she might think I was implying something more since that’s what had happened before. “Just tattooing, not—”
She cracked a smile and silenced me with a finger to my lips. “I know. But could you do it in here instead? I wouldn’t mind watching, but I also don’t want to leave.” Even she seemed confused by that, but I was proud of her for asserting her desire.
“Of course. I’ll go get my things.”
I left her there, looking adrift in her sea of blankets and pillows, every part of my routine upside down.
She looked like every dream I’d never allowed myself to have. I hoped I’d get to keep her.