Chapter 41
Serenity
“ARE YOU REALLY DOING THIS?” my dad asked slowly, a forlorn expression deeply etched into the lines of his face.
My shift was over in ten minutes, which meant I only worked for this man for a handful more of minutes. It was almost over. This tie to a job and people who held me back was truly almost gone. But with that last stretch of time remaining, I was faced with this final battle—my Dad and step-mom.
Dad sat in his chair behind his polished desk while his flawless wife perched on the armrest of that chair. They stared at me like I’d lost my mind for thinking I could walk away from this business and toward a career I’d chosen for myself.
“I am,” I finally answered him, a rush of pride flowing into my words. “I’m going to be a fulltime author now.”
Scarlett sighed and shook her head. “You really want to resort to a life of mockery and misfortune? So you’ve made a bit of money in the last few weeks.
That isn’t going to last, Serenity. I swear, instead of maturing with age, you get even more childish in your way of thinking.
You aren’t seeing the bigger picture and thinking clearly about your future.
What about your father and his business?
What about your responsibility to him and this family? ”
I didn’t look at the woman as she spoke. My eyes stayed locked on Dad’s gray ones, so much like my own. I smiled softly. “Mom used to tell me how much we looked alike. She said I had my daddy’s eyes. I was his little mini me. I was his most precious.”
Dad’s eyes tightened, and a flicker of hurt darted across them. A sudden spike of unease filled the air, but it wasn’t from me, for once. It was from them.
“I still remember,” I said slowly, “how you used to pick me up and spin me around the room. I still remember how you’d pick me up when I fell and dust off my scraped knees.
I still remember how you used to tell me my smile would live with you in your memories forever, making even the hardest of moments easier to get through. ”
Dad opened his mouth, but no sounds came out. He just stared at me.
“My smile,” I mused somberly. “It’s sad that the thing you used to love the most became so unfamiliar to you that you couldn’t even tell how broken it was. How much of a lie it was.”
“What has gotten into you?” Scarlett asked, her worried gaze bouncing between me and Dad. She placed her hand on Dad’s back and leaned in closer to him. “Where is all of this coming from? What—”
“I wanted to die,” I told Dad flatly.
His eyes widened, and his face went white. “Wh—What?”
I cracked a smile. “Yeah. I figured you didn’t notice. You never noticed the bruises your wife left, nor the wounds I gave myself to smother the pain that came with being alive.”
“You’re crazy!” Scarlett shouted in alarm. Like a perpetual damsel, she leaned into her husband. “Darling, I told you. She’s ill. She needs—”
“For you to shut the fuck up,” I snapped, finally looking at her.
My voice had gone dangerously sharp, and my gaze narrowed with every bit of hatred I’d tried fighting for so many years.
“That’s what I need. I need you to shut that stupid, useless mouth so I can talk to my dad for one fucking second. ”
Scarlett’s mouth went agape, and even Dad had gone rigid, his brows in his hairline and mouth hanging wide.
I snorted a sardonic chuckle and shook my head.
“I held it in. I always held it in. And I nearly died because of it.” I met Dad’s eyes.
“Your wife is a monster. But you know that, don’t you?
It was just easier for you to pretend to not see what she did to me and how she made me feel.
It was easier for you to pretend that she was the perfect wife, and I was just the crazy, lying, disappointment of a daughter.
That way you could feel better about choosing her over me.
That way you could sleep at night. I only realized this after I myself had become an expert at pretending. Pretending I was okay when I wasn’t.”
Dad’s gray eyes, a mirror of my own, pooled with tears, and they slowly slid down his pale cheeks.
The sight made my heart break, but it wasn’t for him.
Where were those tears when I’d come to him, seeking safety from his abusive lover?
Where were those tears when I’d told him of my dream, only to be told I was a “disappointment?” Where was my dad when I needed him?
“I’m leaving here today,” I told them. “I am starting my life, my way, and I’m doing it with people I love. With people who love me.”
Faces flashed in my mind. Iyla, Addie, and Harper appeared with their faces lit up in laughter as we sat around each other’s rooms. Penelope and Franklin filled my head, their tan bodies nestled in my arms or running around as we played in the yard.
Dante outshone them all, though, his signature smirk softened by a tenderness we shared, wrapping around my head and heart with his overwhelming support.
These people were my family. These were the ones who saw and loved me for who I was.
And because of them, I was okay letting go today.
I was okay walking away from the man who should’ve been, but failed to be, the one always on my side.
“I’m moving on, Dad,” I told him with a smile, and I wondered if he recognized it as the one he hadn’t seen since I was little. “Your most precious is saying goodbye.”
I stood from my chair and turned my back on him as he’d done so, so long ago.
“Serenity,” he choked out behind me, the sound of his cries tearing through the whisper.
I paused, but I didn’t turn around. I notched my chin higher and walked out the door, stronger than I had ever been before.
Finally, the last weight, the last chain, had been broken.
I’d discarded the remnants of what had been holding me down in dark waters so that I could leap into the air and soar toward something better—my shining place in the night.
“CHEERS!”
Our group of nine clinked our glasses together over the center of the table, the alcohol sloshing out a little from the joyous smack. We all drank hearty sips while the club music played around and beneath the VIP lounge we gathered in.
“Woo!”Addie chirped as she slammed her empty glass onto the table. “That hit the spot. We’re going to party so hard tonight to celebrate Serenity quitting her job and officially starting her full-time author career!”
Everyone looked at me and clapped or raised their glass in my direction. An embarrassed heat swept up my neck and face, but more than that, an overwhelming sense of love, pride, and belonging filled me until I thought I might burst.
“Thank you, guys,” I gushed. “But there’s more to celebrate here. Like Iyla’s upcoming piano concert.”
Iyla’s smile widened, and Zagan looked down at the girl beneath his arm like she was the greatest gift to ever appear before him. He placed a kiss on top of her head, and she settled into his arm.
My gaze swung to Harper, who was wrapped in Perseus’s embrace. His chin rested on top of her head while he held her from behind, and there was a certain look of safety perpetually in her soft smile as she stood with him.
“We’re also celebrating Harper’s amazing return to the stage in Dancing in the Dark,” I continued.
“Hell yeah, we are,” Perseus beamed, glancing down at her.
“Addie’s new house that’s almost done,” I went on.
Addie bounced on her toes. Coldin, who stood beside Addie, watched her from the corner of his eye with a silent threat to stop hitting him as she moved happily. Or maybe he liked her brushing up against him. I honestly couldn’t tell with him.
“Not to mention the comeback of Sinners Do It Better,” I grinned at all five members.
Xander raised his glass high and cheered.
“We all have something to celebrate tonight,” I declared enthusiastically.
That was right. Everyone at this table had something going on.
Each and every person here struggled with something—inner demons or physical ones—but in this moment, I realized we were so much more than that.
I was more than my dark thoughts on my bad days.
I was more than the punching bag for others’ enjoyment. I was more than my insecurities.
After another round of drinks, people started splitting off to dance or get more refreshments.
“Wanna dance?” Dante whispered in my ear.
I turned in his arms. “With you? Always.”
He took my hand to pull me away from the table toward the private VIP dance floor. But that wasn’t where I wanted to dance tonight. I tugged him down the stairs where the public dance floor was. The last time we’d been here, I’d been too afraid to dance with him in front of so many people.
Today, I wasn’t afraid.
I knew that voice of uncertainty would come back at times, because getting better in my mental health didn’t mean never falling again.
There would be days I’d struggle and question and have to let go of the fight, something I only now realized was okay.
So I wanted to claim tonight’s victory with him.
I wanted to have the memory for my future self to look back on and know that good times, better times, would come. I just had to hold on and remember.
“Have I told you how beautiful you look today?” Dante asked with his head dipped close to mine as we began to dance to the upbeat tempo.
“Only a few times,” I laughed.
“Let me say it again then. You’re gorgeous, Star.”
I held on tightly to his neck while he cupped my hips in his large hands. Hands that meant safety, meant home. Hands that guided me through the dark and saved me when I’d been ready to give up.
“So this is what it feels like,” I mused with a smile firmly etched on my face. “This is what it feels like to be excited for what’s to come instead of afraid.”
Dante pulled back to look down at me, his signature smirk adorning his lips. “And it’s only the beginning. Your greatest story is just starting.”
My story. One of longed-after dreams. One of my chosen family. One with the kind of love I’d always hoped for.
I stood on my tiptoes to kiss Dante. “I can’t wait!”