Chapter 24
24
‘Please, tell me you’re kidding.’
‘I’m deadly serious. Think about it. How many people will come through here today, do you think? Five hundred? A thousand? Multiply that by the entrance price and you’re looking at a serious amount of cash, and that’s before they buy any drinks or lunch, or their children go mad in the gift shop.’
To my mind, there’s so much wrong with this plan that I don’t know where to start, but I know I have to tread carefully so as not to upset her.
‘There are a couple of snags though,’ I say carefully.
‘Such as?’
‘Well, I don’t imagine you can pick up animals like these at the pet shop, for starters. Plus, I don’t know about you, but I don’t have the first clue how to look after monkeys or lemurs, or even meerkats and penguins.’
‘I wasn’t thinking we’d have animals like this,’ she tells me, undeterred. ‘I was thinking more of a farm-type vibe. You know, chickens, pot-bellied pigs, pygmy goats, those kinds of things. We could open the mill as an attraction, sell flour in the gift shop. We could even have an on-site café and a soft-play area in one of the barns.’
‘Let me get this straight. You’re proposing, based on a single visit to a zoo in the pouring rain, that we completely change our business plan and do something neither of us knows the first thing about?’
‘Look, I know it sounds crazy when you say it like that, but you’re forgetting the aces up our sleeves.’
‘What aces?’
‘Ben and George. I bet Ben knows all about keeping animals, or he’ll know someone who does. George knows all about the mill, and I bet we wouldn’t be the first HIBT partner to do something like this.’
‘OK, but even if that’s true and they’re willing to help, where is the money going to come from?’ I persist. ‘We’ve just about got enough to build the extension on the cottage, but this would cost a fortune. The cost of the fences alone is making me feel faint, and that’s assuming the council will let us do it, which I’m almost certain they won’t.’
‘We don’t extend the cottage.’
‘I’m sorry?’
‘We get it up to standard but don’t extend it. That’s where we’re going to live. It’s like it was meant to be, Thea. Our plot may be “too big to garden, too small to farm”, but it’s just the right size for something like this.’
I study her for a while. Her face is lit up with enthusiasm, and I just don’t have the heart to pop her bubble. Her plan is so full of holes that I’m confident it will sink quite happily on its own, so I decide to humour her.
‘OK. I’m not buying into this yet,’ I tell her. ‘But I’m happy for you to talk to George and Ben to see what they think.’
I’m certain they’ll both think the same as me, that this is the worst idea ever. Rebecca evidently doesn’t see it that way, however, as she leaps up, comes round the table we’re sitting at and envelops me in a massive hug.
‘Thank you,’ she breathes after a few moments.
‘What for?’
‘For being such a good friend and listening to me. I know you think it’s bonkers because I can see it in your face, but it’s got to be worth a look, hasn’t it?’
‘There’s certainly no harm in finding out more,’ I tell her as she releases me. I feel like a terrible coward for not saying no straight away, but maybe it’s kinder to let her discover the flaws in her idea on her own.
George’s traction engine turns out to be located in an industrial unit not far from Tenterden. It’s nearly four in the afternoon when we get there, so we’ve told the boys this will be a flying visit. Despite their earlier enthusiasm, that seems to go down well as they’re both flagging after running rampage through the soft-play area for over an hour.
I was expecting to be confronted with a load of rusty-looking bits of metal when I stepped through the door, but the engine appears to be almost complete, and it’s absolutely massive.
‘Wow,’ Rollo breathes as he takes it in. Louis appears to have lost the power of speech completely.
‘Hello?’ I call, my voice echoing in the large chamber.
‘I’ll be with you in just a sec,’ George’s voice calls back, and a few moments later his head pops up in the area where the driver would stand. His smile is wide and, even though he’s dressed in the filthiest overalls I think I’ve ever seen and he has grease smudges on both cheeks, my stomach still flips at the sight of him.
‘What do you think?’ he asks the boys once he’s climbed down and greeted us properly. This is the first time that Saffy, Rollo and Louis have met him, and I can sense Saffy sizing him up.
‘It’s awesome,’ Louis practically shouts. ‘Can we climb up on it?’
‘I’m not sure that’s a good idea,’ Rebecca says quickly. ‘It looks dangerous.’
‘It’s OK,’ George tells her. ‘They’ll be fine. You’ll be careful and do exactly what I say, won’t you, boys?’
Rebecca and Saffy look on nervously as George carefully guides Rollo and Louis up onto the traction engine, before showing them around and explaining how it all works. I was expecting this to be a ten-minute visit, tops, but George is doing that thing he does so well, which is pitching his explanations at just the right level to keep the boys interested, so nearly half an hour goes by before they reluctantly climb down again. While we wait, I allow my fantasies of George and the traction engine free rein in my head, with the result that I’m feeling nearly as jittery as Rebecca and Saffy by the time they rejoin us, although the reasons are very different. I was right. Seeing George has pushed Alasdair back into his box.
‘That was the best thing I’ve ever seen,’ Rollo enthuses.
‘Say thank you to George,’ Saffy prompts the boys.
‘Thank you,’ they chorus obediently.
‘Ah, you’re welcome,’ he tells them. ‘I always like showing off my engine, so thank you for being so interested.’
‘I bet you’d like to see his engine,’ Rebecca murmurs to me suggestively. ‘Go on, ask if you can climb on top of it. It’s so big, you need a ladder to get all the way up.’
‘Stop it,’ I whisper back before turning to George.
‘It’s certainly impressive,’ I tell him, causing Rebecca to snort with laughter next to me. ‘How many of you are involved with it?’
‘There are four of us,’ he explains. ‘We each own a quarter share and we spend every weekend working on her. The others would normally be here, but I explained I had some VIP guests coming, so they decided to give themselves the afternoon off.’
‘It’s quite an undertaking. When do you think it will be finished?’
‘We’re going as fast as we can. This place costs a fortune, so that’s quite an incentive. We’d like to be ready for the summer show season next year, but a lot of that will depend on whether we can get the remaining parts and the necessary certifications in time. Oddly, you can’t just pick up bits in your local auto centre, and the health and safety people aren’t keen on the idea of a catastrophic explosion, especially if there are members of the public nearby, so she has to pass a boiler inspection before she’s allowed out.’
‘I notice you refer to it as “she”,’ Saffy says. ‘Does she have a name?’
George smiles again. ‘Indeed she does.’ He walks over to a stack of metal sheets leaning against one wall, pulls one out and turns it so we can see.
‘Harriet. Nice,’ Saffy tells him.
‘We didn’t give it to her. It’s the name she came with.’
‘Where do you even go to buy something like this?’ Rebecca asks. ‘It’s not exactly the sort of thing you’d pick up on eBay, is it.’
‘No, but there are online marketplaces for pretty much everything, including traction engines.’
‘Is there a traction engine equivalent of HIBT?’ I ask. ‘I can imagine this being the kind of thing that would attract hordes of Ernests.’
‘There is,’ he says, laughing. ‘But it’s more of a club than anything else.’
‘So they’re advisory Ernests rather than mandatory Ernests,’ I continue.
‘Something like that.’ There’s a twinkle of mischief in his eyes as we banter and he’s grinning. I’m going to need a cold bath at this rate. How does this man manage to have such a mesmeric effect on me?
‘George,’ Rebecca begins tentatively, popping the bubble George and I seem to have found ourselves in. ‘Can I ask you something about the mill, quickly?’
‘I’m afraid not,’ he tells her. His voice is serious, but the twinkle is still there as he glances back at me. He’s definitely flirting.
‘Oh. Why not?’ Rebecca sounds mildly affronted.
‘It’s the weekend. I don’t know anything about mills at weekends.’
‘That’s ridiculous,’ she scoffs. ‘You know about your traction engine during the week. I’ve heard you talking about it.’
‘I always know about traction engines because they’re my passion. But mills are work, so I only know about them during office hours.’
‘OK, how about I tell you something about the mill instead,’ she says after considering his reply for a moment, and I have to admit I’m impressed with her ability to think on her feet. ‘I don’t expect it to make sense now, but it might on Monday morning when you know about mills again.’
‘I might not remember,’ he warns her, still grinning.
‘I’ll take the risk. Thea and I are thinking about opening the mill as a tourist attraction, with a sort of petting farm thing attached, and maybe a soft-play area, café and shop. What do you think?’
His expression turns serious as he pivots his gaze to me.
‘I haven’t signed off on it yet,’ I say defensively. ‘I’ve just suggested she talks to you and Ben. Nothing to do with me.’
‘Why does it matter what I think?’ he asks cautiously.
‘Because you’ve probably got other HIBT people who’ve done similar things with their historic buildings,’ she tells him. ‘You might have useful advice for us.’
‘I see. Well, it does sound interesting. Shall I give you a call on Monday?’
‘Do you think,’ I say, sensing an opportunity, ‘it’s the kind of thing that might warrant a site visit? Big plans like this are best discussed face to face, don’t you agree?’
‘I can certainly ask,’ he replies, and his expression is unreadable. I don’t care though. Rebecca’s plan may be mad, but if it gets George on site for a day, that’s a big plus in my book.
‘This is more than you just fancying him, like Rebecca said,’ Saffy says matter-of-factly later that evening. ‘I’m smelling full-on crush here. Am I right?’
Rebecca’s gone to spend the night with Ben so I’ve agreed to help settle Rollo at Saffy’s for the night and stay for dinner with her and Tim. The boys have had baths and are currently totally engrossed in a PlayStation game, and we’re sitting at the kitchen table with glasses of wine while Tim cooks.
‘You’ve seen him, right?’
‘Oh yes, and he’s undoubtedly good looking, but I’m afraid I agree with Rebecca. He’s like a cardboard cutout of a beach hunk. Beautiful, but lacking in substance.’
‘No, he isn’t.’
‘He is, sorry. He’s nice enough, but I think he’d bore you long term. You need someone with more oomph.’
‘Maybe I don’t want oomph.’
‘You might not want it, but you need it and I’m afraid I don’t think he has it. Not enough, anyway. You’re welcome to prove me wrong, of course.’
‘Why, thank you,’ I say, slightly petulantly. ‘I might just do that.’
Annoyingly, Alasdair chooses this moment to escape from the box I pushed him so firmly into earlier. I wonder what Saffy would have made of him, if she’d met him. I have no doubt that he would have charmed her, because he’s unable to do anything else, but would she have decreed him to be ‘enough’ with the same certainty that she’s now dismissing George? It’s all academic, I decide as I mentally shove Alasdair back into his box once more. He belongs in the past with ‘old’ Thea and I don’t want any crossover from my old life contaminating the new. As far as George is concerned, there’s only one way to find out if Saffy and Rebecca have a point or not, and that’s to spend more time getting to know him. I just need to engineer more ways to do that.