Chapter 10
Chapter Ten
Arabella was just about to make her way to the breakfast room when Mrs. Robertson found her. It was later than Arabella usually ate, but she had slept in after everything that happened, and even when she finally woke, it took her a while to drag herself out of bed.
She had expected a maid to come and tend to her. Although she did not have such a thing at her own home, she knew a little of what a duchess might expect, and she lay in bed for well over an hour in anticipation of finally being woken up and told that her breakfast was waiting.
When such an eventuality did not occur, Arabella decided there had to be a reason for this. Had the Duke expressly asked that she be left alone? Was he so determined to remind her of her place, to rely on him and him alone, that he had gone out of his way to cut her off from the staff? Surely not.
That hour was spent thinking about the previous night. Still, Arabella could feel the Duke’s lips on her own, and it made her skin prickle and her legs shake if she dared to concentrate on it, which she did far more than she wanted to do.
It had only been a kiss, but all his talk of control implied that he intended to do more than that.
Now that she was alone again, and a night had passed since the incident, Arabella liked to believe that she would have denied him, as if she had that much self-control.
But the more she thought about it, as well as how her body had responded, the more she was forced to admit that she was not that strong.
It is a good thing that he stopped himself….
The Duke had appeared angry with himself, too, as if he had failed somehow. That was something that she did not understand, and it only added another layer of confusion to what was already a most confusing situation.
Not knowing what to expect or what had happened, Arabella reaffirmed her decision from last night. Distance was what she needed from the Duke to treat him as a stranger. Only then might her life be her own. Which was what she wanted!
So, she spent the morning getting ready alone, then she left her room to find the breakfast room. However, the moment she stepped into the hallway, she came face-to-face with Mrs. Robertson.
“Good morning!” the elderly maid beamed. “I am so glad to see you awake, Your Grace.” She looked positively delighted.
“Oh, Mrs. Robertson.” Arabella blinked back her surprise, caught off guard by the woman’s positive attitude. “Good morning…”
“I do wish to apologize, Your Grace,” she continued merrily.
“I meant to wake you earlier, to see you ready for the day, but I decided against it.” Her smile held.
“It was not personal, of course. Heavens no!” she laughed.
“But I was on my way to wake you, and I said to myself, ‘Mrs. Robertson, I am sure that the last thing she wants this morning is you disturbing her. After the night she had!’” She laughed again with delight.
“So, I thought it prudent to let you sleep in on your first morning here. I hope you do not mind.”
“You…” Arabella frowned. “So, His Grace did not ask that I be left alone?”
“No, Your Grace, certainly not.”
Arabella breathed a small sigh of relief. It was such a silly thing, but she was pleased to see that he was not so petty. Then again, did that mean that he had not thought about her at all?
And why do I care? I should want that!
“In fact, if you have time later, I hope that we might discuss your morning routine and what you expect from us,” Mrs. Roberston continued.
“If you wish to be woken with the sun, if you prefer to sleep in, and at what time you usually break your fast. This is your home now, Your Grace, and it is yours to command.”
“It is?” She blinked again.
“Of course,” Mrs. Robertson said with cheer. “Whatever you wish, however you wish it, just say the word.”
Arabella found herself smiling. While the Duke was a storm of sorrow and moroseness, Mrs. Robertson was the complete opposite. And while it was still so early, far too soon to know what to expect, Arabella felt a small flutter of relief erupt in her stomach.
She was in charge of her home, which was very unusual for her, but also exactly what she wanted.
“We can discuss such things later,” Arabella said. “For now, I am ravished. Might you show me to the breakfast room?”
“Certainly,” Mrs. Robertson said. “However, I must inform you that His Grace wishes to see you at once. He did not clarify if it was to be after you broke your fast, but based on what I know of him…” She continued to smile, but it was not quite as warm. “I would suggest not keeping him waiting.”
“He does?” Arabella swallowed. “Did he say what for?”
“Not to me,” she said. “Likely, he just wishes to make sure that you are settling in.”
That seemed unlikely. Arabella had decided she needed to stay away from the Duke at all costs, especially after what happened the night before. Given how it ended, she expected him to think the same way.
But why did he want to speak to her so soon?
Her mind turned as she tried to fathom the reason.
Perhaps he just wanted to check on her? Perhaps he wished to apologize?
Or maybe, and most likely, he was set on doubling down on what he had told her last evening.
That he wanted to ensure that Arabella knew her place.
To avoid him was right, smart, and how close Arabella came to ignoring his request to speak.
No… this is my home, and I need to start acting like it.
Arabella wanted her freedom, but that could not exist if she was too scared to speak to the one man who could give it to her. What sort of life would it be if she spent it in fear and hiding? Certainly not her own, and certainly not what she was promised.
Besides, seeing him again might be a good thing. Maybe, if she were able to assert herself as she needed to, she could finally put her confusion to bed and confirm with the Duke once and for all what she expected. She had to believe that she could.
“Lead the way,” she said to Mrs. Robertson as she brought herself up, took a calming breath, and braced for what she was certain would be a most awkward encounter.
One minute later, Arabella was stepping into the Duke’s study.
She knew the moment she did it that it would not be a repeat of the night before.
The room was cold, and she started to shake as soon as she walked in.
It was dark too, but not in an atmospheric way.
The Duke sat behind his desk, his head bent over his work, and she sensed a guarded determination in him not to look at her—to act as if she did not exist.
“You… You sent for me?” she asked, her voice breaking.
“I did,” he said, still not looking up; whatever he worked on, it held his full attention. He let that statement sit between them, the scratching of his quill the only noise present. It was sharp, and Arabella winced as it cut through the parchment.
“Might I ask why?” she offered when he did not speak.
“I take it that Mrs. Robertson spoke to you this morning?” he said, still not looking.
“She did.”
“Good,” he said. “She will be your point of contact for all things. Whatever you need, you are to go to her directly. And if you need anything from me, seek her first, and she will pass your message along.”
Arabella frowned. She was not so much hurt by his cold detachment but surprised by it. After how he had behaved last night…
“Is that all?” she asked him, making her voice cold. “I spoke with Mrs. Robertson already, and she told me the same.”
“No, that is not all.” Another pause as he worked. She glared at him with anger that she did not expect but clung to anyway. “I will be leaving today for London.”
The statement took a moment to hit.
“Oh…”
“And I expect to be gone for a few days,” he continued.
A final flourish of his quill, and he put it down.
Only then did he finally look at her. He sat perfectly straight, no emotion on his face, and his gray eyes were empty as if he looked past her, rather than at her.
“During which time, I expect you to become familiar with the running of this estate. This is your home now, and as the duchess, you will be tasked with its upkeep.”
“A few days?” Arabella’s frown increased. “Where are you going?”
“I told you, London.”
“What for?”
He raised an eyebrow at her. “Business, and that is all you need to know.”
“You are leaving me here?” The question came out accusatory.
“Is that a problem? As you so keenly observed, we are little more than strangers, and I sensed that you wanted such a thing. In fact, I was assured that you wanted your own life.”
Arabella could not explain why she felt such anger.
She ought to have cried with relief, sung the Duke’s praises, and told him that he could stay away for as long as he wished.
This was what she wanted! Not just to be left alone, but to be left in charge of the estate.
Her own person… control of her own life.
I ought to be thrilled!
But her thoughts could not help but return to the previous evening. Even with how cold the study was, she felt that familiar burning rush across her body. She pictured the look in his eyes, saw their desire, and felt his kiss on her lips, so that they prickled with his taste.
Arabella was not so foolish as not to know what the Duke was doing. Whatever had happened between them, he was determined to see that it would not happen again. She doubted that he had business, just as she knew that he was running.
Disappointment washed over her, but she pushed it aside, determined to focus on the good in this news.
“It is not a problem,” she said with a slight sneer. “In fact, I suggest you stay away for as long as you need. I will be fine here on my own.”
“You will not be on your own,” he said. “While I am gone, I expect you to introduce yourself to Timothy, as I expect you to develop a relationship with him. That was, after all, why I married you. The only reason.” He let that final statement sit between them.
“Of course,” she said with a fake smile. “I will do as I promised, just as I am pleased to see that you are doing the same.”
“Did you expect anything else?”
“I guess not.”
They exchanged a silent glance, as if he were testing her, daring her to complain. Was he hoping she would ask him to stay? Arabella might have refused once, but after last evening…
“Is there anything else?” she asked, pushing that thought away.
“No.” He bent his head back over and picked up his quill. “That will be all.” And then, he went back to work, the scratching of his quill the only sound heard.
Arabella continued to glare as if she ought to be angry, but the Duke did not see it. So, she turned and left the study, careful not to slam the door closed.
Once she was alone, she ran through their conversation in her head. It was a good thing, she knew. It was what she wanted. Despite these assurances, Arabella could not escape the feeling that she had just lost something.
And all the while, the feel of the Duke’s lips as he kissed her with passion and unkept desire continued to make her skin prickle…