Chapter 29 #3
Victor’s instinct for self-preservation told him to fight back, but he stymied this, remembering what Lydia said.
His brother had a right to be angry.
Victor needed to let him feel these emotions.
So, he stayed silent, and it was Lydia who calmed Harry. She placed a hand on his arm and gently pulled it away. The other soon followed.
“Lord Harry, that’s not important right now. But what is important is that your son is in the same house as you. You should go to him.”
Harry looked as though a trance had been broken. He ran a hand through his hair, leaving it tousled. Victor adjusted his collar.
“Yes… yes you’re right, Lydia,” he said and moved out of the room. Lydia and Victor followed some distance behind as servants rushed into the room, disturbed by the sound of smashing glass.
The three of them made their way to the nursery where John was crying. Georgia was rocking him back and forth, shushing loudly. She gave a despairing look to Lord Harry, John, and Lydia as they entered the room.
“I’ve tried giving him a feed, but he’s not hungry. I don’t know what’s wrong with the little mite. He might have a tooth coming through, poor thing,” she said.
“I’ll take him.” Lord Harry strode towards Georgia and took John in his arms without a second thought. Georgia gave a somewhat puzzled look to Lydia, who dismissed her. She and Victor remained near the doorway, giving Harry a moment alone with his child.
Victor looked at the two of them together.
Now that he knew the truth, he could see a lot of Harry in John and wondered how he could have been so blind to it before.
Harry paced back and forth, holding John over his shoulder and stroking the baby’s back.
For all the pride Victor had felt about caring for John, it had never been like this.
The boy was with his father, and the only reason this had not happened earlier was because of Victor. His obstinacy had made not only Harry suffer but John as well. Cracks appeared in his heart, and he looked over towards Lydia, whose eyes were filled with emotion.
“I need to change,” she said and quickly rushed away before Victor could say anything.
“There, there, you don’t have anything to worry about.
I have you now. Papa has you,” Harry said, and it was as though a veil was lifted from Victor’s eyes.
He saw Harry as he had never seen him before, not as a younger brother who let his emotions get the better of him but as a man whose heart was ready and willing to love and who was far more of a natural fit for this child than Victor could ever have been.
Harry turned.
“You don’t have to hover there, Victor. The child is safe with me. I won’t drop him.”
“That’s not what I’m thinking. I’m actually thinking that fatherhood suits you,” Victor said in a gentle tone. “And I’m sorry for preventing you from enjoying this before.”
“This doesn’t make things right between us, Victor,” Harry said, turning his back on his brother.
“I know, but I do hope there is a way to make things right, Harry. I am beginning to see things differently. I thought I was acting in your best interests, making a rational decision when your heart betrayed you, but I was wrong.”
Harry turned around as Victor uttered these words. It was a rare occurrence for Victor to admit he was wrong. Victor took a deep breath.
“I shouldn’t have allowed our family’s reputation to get in the way of everything else.
The ton is the ton, and it will always believe what it wants.
We should not allow others to dictate our fate.
That baby has taught me a great deal, far more than I ever realized was possible, and I can see the error of my ways.
I do not know what is coming, and I know you may never forgive me, but I want you to know that you have my blessing to live freely.
Pursue your heart, live the life you want, and do not think about Society’s rules.
Do what is right. That is what Father did, and I fear that I lost sight of that for too long. ”
“Even if I still love Juliet?” Harry said softly.
“Even then,” Victor replied.
Harry’s raw emotions were mollified, and there was a moment of openness shared between the brothers. John had quickly calmed in Harry’s arms, and his head nestled in the crook of his father’s neck. John looked as though he was made to be there.
“I’m not sure how she’ll feel about me after all this time. Everything that happened must have taken a great toll on her. I’m not sure what will happen.”
“There’s only one way to find out, and it seems we won’t have to wait too long,” Victor said.
“No, I suppose we won’t.”
Victor decided to leave Harry to spend some time alone with his child, making up for all the time that had been lost. He walked to his own chambers but paused before Lydia’s door.
He raised a hand, intending to knock, but then thought better of it and paced to his own room, bringing the night to a close.
It was odd, he thought. He had only just been getting used to the idea of being a father. Now, it was over, and he wondered if he had ever actually been a father at all.